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Recent content by Fenikkusu

  1. F

    Nahio Saga

    G for General audience Episode 2: Seek and you shall find. A machine beeped. Footsteps echoed in the large house. It was midday; the sun hovered directly over the home and gave it a dark gloomy feeling. Quickly down the stairs came a small woman. Dressed in tight clothes she breezed over...
  2. F

    Nahio Saga

    Thanks for the tips, they are very spot on. You're right on everything you said. I'll try to put everything you said into practice with my next chapter (as well as improving this one). EDIT: Edited story, lots of improvements. Me sister helped me edit it. Again thanks for the advice.
  3. F

    Nahio Saga

    ~~EDITED VERSION~~ **G for General audience (may contain teenage boys screaming like little girls) Please give me constructive criticism at least. Any other mistakes, hints and most of all good feelings about it would be great to hear.** Episode 1: The Origin A small boy popped smoothly...
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