It would seem that you are new here, and I've noticed your recent addition to the Fan-Fic section. Welcome! I read through it quick, and I like the concept of the story so far. You've done a good job characterizing May and introducing conflict to the story.
As for my suggestions, the first thing is an aesthetic issue. I would advise not using enter after each sentence; it makes the paragraphs look choppy and disorganized. Second, you don't spend much time describing characters and background scenes; as a result, most of the scenes take place in a vacuum. You don't need vivid details, but a line or two to describe May and a couple more for the gym would help establish the scene.
The last point is a continuity issue, something super-nitpicky but I feel deserves to be said since you're using the canon. Gyms don't necessarily have to be handed down family lines - recall that Wallace received the position of gym leader from his mentor Juan. I think a more reasonable approach to May being forced to act as gym leader would be to wait for a more appropriate replacement, just a suggestion.
Alright, that's that. Again, welcome, and I look forward to seeing how the story continues.
