Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted

Granted. Tomorrow, it will change into something even creepier.
I wish I could bring stuff to life.

Granted. You bring abunch of wierd killer maniacs to life that haunt you the rest of your life.
I wish I had ice cream...

Granted. I put it in the microwave first.

I wish that the next person would rate my sig.

Granted. I'll let the next poster rate your sig.
I wish the next poster will rate jigglppuff8's sig.

Granted, you turn on your car and get under it :P

I wish that I had a car.

You get a brand new car but then someone steals it and you never find it again.
I wish I had a mansion.

Granted. However, one day 2 girls come and knock out the gate guard, steal the library's books, knock out the entire maid staff, and play with the devil locked that was locked in the basement.

I wish I knew what win felt like.

DENIED DENIED DENIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I could unread that.

Skipped machop's.GROSS!!!
Granted. Then in a few minutes a mod will see machop's posts. I hope...
I wish I could unread that too.

Granted but then the potato was poisoned and you die. THE END.
I wish machop stops posting gross stuff.

Okay that is GROSS!!!
Not granted. Totally NOT granted.
NEXT!

Granted. Just use the report button and leave it alone.

I wish that trolls didn't come to this website... That's why I left my last one.

Your wish was about to come true, but then you got banned from this website. Bye bye.

I wish I had an infinite amount of wishes! *evil laugh*

Granted. But then a fairy found out and got those wishes back.
I wish I got ghost powers.

Well, you already have an infinite amount of wishes, but that doesn't mean all of them will come true.
Hopes and aspirations. Oh how droll.

I wish that the person viewing this thread besides me doesn't beat me to post.

edit And my wish has been horribly mutated.

Granted. There is no on else viewing this thread.
I hope I get to have a real life Mew.

Granted. The Mew loves you so much, that you never get sleep again because you're constantly playing with it...
I wish all my wishes could be what I want them to be.

Granted. One day, you got mad and wished you were never born and POOF! You're gone.
I wish I had superpowers.

Granted. But sadly, now that you're a superhero, THOUSANDS of villians try to kill you and you're always busy.
I wish Disney would stop taking over every TV station with things like the Jonas Brothers....

Granted. Disney went out of business and you became the president of the most successful TV Station ever so all the TV stations joined forces and put yo out of business too.
I wish there would be a villain who will actually beat the hero once.