My mother belivie that everyone has some attractiveness for both genders inside of them ,even if its a little tiny bit of difference. My parents are perfectly ok with who I am.
I actually want to just kind of talk about something, its a bit personal, but I'd rather dump it here to see what people think about what I have to say. It is about my sexuality, my "gender", and even my apperence.
I had a lot of phases where I thought I was gay, bisexual, transgender, or all sorts of sexuality, but right now I'm just myself and pansexual. I am a natural born male, but I have came to the conclusion that I'd rather be known as some where in the between. Where I can be able to pass as both and kind of be a 50/50. I find people who give off that kind of apperence to be attractive, and I'd love to strive to be that. However, I am not that; I am more masculine physically, more neutral in RL appeal, and a lot more feminine in online talk.
I feel as if I can't really give myself the label of "gender-nuetral" because I'm not aligned in the middle in all of my situations, when I would rather be. A big part of my desire to become one in the middle is a bit because I have an attractiveness for people like that, and part of it is because its something I would want to do.
I never really felt like this until some time last year when I started going through these weird phases, but this feels like the final answer to what I need. I don't want to be a girly-male, or a trans woman, I kind of just want to be on my own in a way. I don't want to grow a beard and be muscular, nor do I care to be wearing skirts and trying to take hormones.
I don't know, maybe I am weird for this, but I'd rather be weird than sheltered from myself.
TL;DR - I feel like that my sexuality has shifted to something I have a high agreeing on and that is being someone who has an unidentified gender and belong in the pansexual flag.
I may follow up later, I may not; just want to talk.