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Journey to Latias

+el_pal

Call meh Zee. Really.
    • 1,259
    Posts
    21
    Years
    ((This is my first try! I'm not sure if it's in the right forum ^__^; ))

    Chapter One: The Book of Latias's Secrets
    In the middle of summer, Emily ran through the field letting her hair flow with the wind. Her little Plusle, Sparky ran along side Emily like she was a magnet. Sparky would never leave Emily and Emily would never leave Sparky. The ran playfully through the summer fields wishing it would last forever. Sparky fastened her pace and didn't notice the obsyacle in her way. Emily tried to stop Sparky but Sparky had already tripped over a thick book on the floor.


    "Ooh, my back," Sparky whined. Emily quickly picked up Sparky and brought her inside. Her mother took care of Plusle and Emily went to investigate the book. She lifted the book from the grass and using her hankerchief she wiped layers of dust from the book's cover. She could vaguely see a Pokemon on the worn cover. It looked like a red dragon. There was a look of inocence in the dragon's eyes. She ran as fast as she could to get back in the house with the book.


    When she got in she showed the old and worn book to her mother. Her mother told Emily, "This book has a Latias picture on it! We should keep it safe for it might keep secrets that none should know." Just as Emily was going to reply the door crshed open. Sparky rushed to Emily and Emily's mother shielded them. It was a Houndoom and a scary looking man in a long flowing black coat.


    The man spoke in a low voice, "Hand over the book."


    Emily threw the man an angry look and yelled at him, "NEVER!!" The Houndoom gave a mighty bark at Emily and growled. The stranger looked and smirked. The Houndoom barked at Emily's mother and snatched the book from her hands. Sparky tried to shock Houndoom but Houndoom was too quick. The man quickly exited the house with Houndoom. Sparky, so devastated, fainted. The others just stared.
     
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    It's a nice start. But I recomend seperating quotes from paragraphs...then it would be more fun to read! ;)
     
    Okay, thanks, I'm going to try that! Uhh, I actually don't know exactly how to do it but I'll try!
     
    It's not very long, but I don't have the time!

    Chapter 2: Broken Pride

    "How could we let him get away!!" Sparky stomped the ground almost crashing throw the wodden floor, "He has the book!! I was soo stupid!" Sparky pulled her ears so hard it looked like they were going to rip off.

    "Now, now, Sparky we'll get it back!" Emily tried to pat Sparky but Sparky threw static at Emily. Sparky continued to whine and complain. Emily's mother tried to calm Sparky but she just wouldn't.


    "That book could be his key to world dminanace!!" Sparky picked up a vase and threw it out the window. Emily started to boil up and just then one of her Pokeballs opened up with another Pokemon in it.


    "I have had enough of you, Sparky!! You're just a spoiled brat with too much pride!!" It was Roller, the Phanpy. He hit Sparky hard. "You spoiled little-"


    "I am not a spoiled brat!!" Sparky slapped back. They started to fight more and more.


    "Spoiled Plusle brat!!"
    "Good for nothing Phanpy!!"


    "STOP IT!!" Emily yelled at the two. Sparky and Roller threw her a solid look panting. Emily turned to Sparky, "Stop your jibber jabber complaining! We'll find a way to get the book back!!

    Sparky took a deep calm breathe. "But how?" she asked. Emily pointed out the window at the ground. "See those foot steps and dog prints? We can follow them!"

    Emily's mother had a worried look. She really cared for them but she felt as if they had to. So she let them go into the fields to follow the muddy steps and pow prints left behind.
     
    Eheheh, okay no comment? Next chapter...

    Chapter 3: The Dragonite Lair

    "The fields are starting to dry up," Sparky said as she trotted along the trail of footsteps and pawprints, "I think were approaching something dangerous..."


    "Don't be a worry wart, Sparky!" Roller chimed, "I have been to places like this and there was no danger! There must not be a lot of fertile soil or rain here." Suddenly they heard a bomming roar. The ground started to shake a little. Then burrowing out from the ground flew out a black dragonite! Its eyes were piercing red and its body was pitch black. Emily, Sparky and Roller tried to run away but the Dragonite had already shot a flamethrower at them. They tried to run faster but Emily had tripped. Sparky and Roller ran to Emily and tried to get her up. But the three knew they were going to burn up. The suddenly when the fire was a few inches away from them light blue forcefield shrouded them. Behind them was Latias!


    Latias violently headbutted the Dragonite. The Dragonite was no match for Latias. The three were saved!
     
    Actually, I don't have a lot of time, so (I don't want to make you read em again but no choice)... So I can't construct all that I want!
     
    They are a bit too short, and I'm at a loss for a plotline.... What is with the book and why did they find Latias so soon? But, you're doin awesome with puctuation, grammar, and paragraphing. That's a good thing because it makes reading your fic much easier and smoother.
     
    I read all three chapters! They are great! Question. Is this gonna be some sort of Role Play or something. I mean like can sertain people join as a character in the storyline?
     
    The story will fit in alog the way. OKay, due to me not having a lot of time. It's going to be a LOT slower because I need to find some time to make it decent legnth.
     
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