[Other Original] The Fallen Hero (temp title)

[HairyLoco]

Hi everyone,

I'll be posting a story that I've been working on, chapter one. The reason I'm posting is because I'm kind of stuck on where to go from here, and I would love to get some advice. If you're interested, please read through it, it would mean a lot to me.

A tale of magic, adventure and fantasy, that's how I can best describe my story. My inspiration, among many others but most widely known is Lord of the Rings and the Warcraft universe, and lesser known is the Raven's Shadow series. These examples will give you an idea of what awaits.
I'll be posting the story in several spoilers so as to prevent a massive first post. The first chapter is about 20 pages long.

(In this bit you'll find a few bold underscored words - they're just key words that I made more notable so that I can refer to that easier.)

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Leave your worldly logic behind as you enter the world called 'Garden of Nalmoreden'. A world that is both in the past and the future, one teeming with life. Different civilizations occupy the forests, the plains, the oceans, the sky, the dessert and so much more.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Over the ages, the Elves, Humans, Khalnir, Dwarves, Mintra, and Vieras had separated into their own civilizations, constantly at war with one another. Each has their own territory, culture, and talents.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Elves were the first modern race, the direct descendants of the titans that created and ruled over the Garden of Nalmoreden. They took great pride in this, and looked down on the other races who descended from them, and although they possess a profound wisdom, their pride would often lead to tunnel vision. Their stature was similar to a human, but they were naturally taller, had long, pointy ears, pale skin and were without exception very thin. They possessed great magical ability, but didn't lack in physical strength either. Although their stamina was low, their bodies regenerated swiftly by just a simple sip of water, replenishing their energy and healing wounds.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Humans were the direct descendants of the Elves. An arrogant people with many individually different talents. Their greed and lust for war separated them from the Elves in the Departed Era, and formed their own civilization. Though few in number, their settlements grew both in size and number. Their lust for war, strategic insight, and variety of talents won them many battles and their land expanded. The human population grew rapidly during the Dawn of Nalmoreden period, a time when the current geography was formed.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Khalnir were in appearance similar to humans, but that's where the similarity ends. Their skin was a pale blue, and their hair was usually coloured white. They had a strange potency for wielding magic, but not many Khalnir were ever taught magic. They were a brute people who would prefer the grip of an axe over a simple staff, they preferred the weight of their heavy battle armour over their light robe. Those who dedicated themselves to the art of war had enough strength and stamina to take on even the immensely powerful Dragons. The Khalnir are brave, but not wise. They have strength but lack the wits, and have been outmanoeuvred in combat throughout history.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Dwarves were a small and stout race. Cheerful and loved to party. The ground was their home, wherever there was rock, sand or clay, there would be Dwarves. They could survive for months or years without water, but not a single Dwarf would go a single day without a mug of ale. Dwarven Ale was known for its superior quality all over the world. The Dwarves are a neutral race, participating in no war, at peace with all the other races. However, the Dwarves were revered for their exceptional skill with the Hammer, the iconic weapon Dwarves wield in all forms and sizes. The very weapon they used for armour- and weaponsmithing. Their craft is known to be legendary, but only few non-Dwarves had ever owned Dwarven Equipment.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Viera used to be known as humans, except they have a strong affinity for magic, and could wield it with ease. They are a gifted people, who seem to be born to absorb large amount of knowledge in fast pace, but they had little to no physical skill. They could hold their own in physical combat due to superior eyesight, a power called Maeras Alvas, which was Vieras tongue for Future Sight, a skill every Viera has. They live with humans, but are treated as outcasts. They have their own society within the society.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Blood-Lords, the Shadows, the Nightwalkers. They had many names, but they call themselves Mindra. A race known for its cruelty and cunning, and the fact that they are nocturnal. Their skin was pale, almost white as snow. They have the odd power[/FONT][FONT=&quot]to manipulate and mutate the blood flowing through someone's veins, as well as extract blood without causing wounds. This power caused them to be feared. They are a stubborn and impatient race, and most of them are dishonourable, untrustworthy, but they respect a written contract marked by blood. [/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]One[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]Arithos[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]***[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]The sun shines down upon my head as I walk through a lush forest. It is a warm day, and the various insects and animals roaming the forest seem to agree, as their cries are heard all around me. A nice spring day like this always makes me feel so relaxed, as if nothing is ever necessary. I like walking around here, as it fits my mood on these days. The sky is blue, it's comfortably warm, and a fresh breeze blows through my brownish, red hair.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The Rangers are well off without me for a day. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]With that in mind, I stepped outside my house this morning, and started walking towards the forest I am at now. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Yes, I am an archer, or more like a scout, in a group of mercenaries called the Oathsworn Rangers. We're not much really, we get requests from the Council, and see to it that they get what they want. In return we get a place to call home, and enough money to make a living. We had sworn an oath to ever fulfil our orders, no matter what happens, no questions asked. If they ordered me to kill my family, then so be it. Luckily, that's not a very likely thing to happen, but you get the idea. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The forest cleared into an open field surrounded by steep cliffs. It's a wide area with grass everywhere, but there's one hill in the middle and on top of it, exactly in the middle, there's a huge oak tree. It's even taller than the cliffs that rise from the meadow. Many people used to come here, but according to legend, there's a "dangerous entity" lurking around here. Nobody has been able to describe it clearly, or even see it, but I know better. I come here very often, it's a great place to just lie down and watch the clouds. No one bugging you, no one around to even distract you, just the sound of the wind blowing through the trees, and the smell of grass. A beast that tries to kill you? Here? Ridiculous. This place is the embodiment of harmony, serenity, and peace. With my back against the oak tree, my arrow-filled quiver and my bow next to me, I sat down and took a deep breath. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]People are missing out.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] Is the first thought that comes to my mind. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]It's ridiculous how people believe in something someone came up with, couldn't describe clearly, but said it was dangerous. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Well, there's no need to risk your life unnecessarily, but they are so short minded to simply go along with a legend and miss out on this awesome place.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]On the other hand, I wouldn't want this place filled with people either. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]People tend to destroy that which they love, even if they don't mean to. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]They overcrowd places, taking up its resources and trample on its beauty. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]So in a way, I'm glad that legend exists, it allows me to simply lie here and relax for a while.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] With that thought, my eyes closed. I fell asleep.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]My nap did not last long, however. I was woken up by someone shaking my shoulder. Still trying to wake up, I could not clearly make out who it was, but in the silhouette I could make out long hair with two braids and a slim, female figure. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Sir, wake up, you shouldn't sleep in the sun! You could get sunburn...' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Her voice made her sound like a young woman, perhaps between the age of 15 and 25. I, still trying to make sense of it all, got a little annoyed by her intrusion. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Can't a man just sleep?' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I really didn't want to bother with this, but after a moment of waking , I realized I was lying in the shadow of the oak tree before I fell asleep. Have I been asleep for hours? It felt like just a few minutes. I apologized to her and explained myself. She sat down next to me and reached into her basket. She took out a loaf of bread, split it in two and offered me a half while smiling.
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]It wasn't until now that I could make out what she looked like. Who she was, was still a mystery to me. She had a few freckles on her straight face, blue eyes and blonde hair. She looked no older than 20, but had a particular look from her eyes I could not exactly place. She looked as if she has seen and experienced many, many things. As if she has wisdom that far exceeds her age. She wore a red dress with matching shoes. On her dress there was an insignia I couldn't exactly place either. It had the shape of a shield, in it was a fire and a green python rising from it. I had never seen the crest before. I happily accepted her offer and looked down into the grass.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]I was the first to break the silence. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'So, what brings you here anyway? Many people avoid this area because of the legend that haunts this place.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]She looked up, seemingly interested. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What legend do you speak of?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Aren't you from town?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'No, I'm not... I have no place I can call "home". My homeland was invaded by the army of the Gallerian Empire a few years back, and my hometown was destroyed. I've been traveling ever since. By the way, I am Serena. Serena Rayner.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Apologies. My name is Arithos, Arithos Marin. The legend I spoke of is a legend being told in my hometown close to here, Eldridge Town. It's a rather vague legend, but people actually seem to take it. They say there is a "dangerous entity" lurking about in this valley, but no one seems to have a clue of what it is, let alone what it looks like, or any other details. I've been coming here for years, and I have never seen anything weird here.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]She seemed to listen closely. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Does anyone have an idea what it could be?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'There's no one alive who has seen it, people seem to make up details about him, but always end up contradicting one another.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I took a bite off the bread and flavours exploded inside my mouth. How can plain dry bread taste like this? It was sweet but at the same time a little salty and left a bitter aftertaste. Regaining my composure, I went on.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'One says it has wings, another says it lives underground. One says it has scales, another says it has fur, and so on. It's all very vague, but, more importantly... What kind of bread is this? I have never eaten something like this before in my whole life!'[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Serena closed her eyes and smiled at me, which was when I realized this was the first time I saw her smile. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'It's conjured bread I had enchanted. I'm a Viera.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]And a damned good chef as well[/FONT][FONT=&quot], was the thought that first went through my mind. I had not yet seen many Vieras in my life. Most Vieras are outcasts and dedicate all of their time to studying the arcane. They seem to devote their time only to their training, and to disregard everything else. Everyone else take a disliking to them as well. They say whenever a Viera appears, he will only bring death and destruction. It's as if they assume them ticking time bombs. It's said that some some Vieras literally exploded by melding more energy than they could handle, and that has caused many casualties.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]However, Serena didn't seem so bad. In fact, I found myself enjoying her company. [/FONT]


[FONT=&quot]Darkness fell. Stars were lighting up the sky and the land bathed in the light of the moon. A chilly wind blew, and it had gotten cold. The temperature always drops quickly around these parts. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Well, I think it's about time we get back to town, it's getting rather cold and in less than an hour the temperature will drop below zero.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Serena nodded at my proposal and got up, stretched her arms and legs, picked up her basket and waited for me to get up. We walked back together towards the forest, leaving the meadow behind us.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Once back in town I asked where she stayed. She looked down shyly. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I stay at the Pale Mug Inn.' She said softly. And immediately the reason of her embarrassment became clear to me. The Pale Mug Inn is a very… low-budget inn. I doubt they have even heard of the word maintenance there. I've been there once, and that was the last time I ever went there. Beds were hard as rock, bloodstains all over the sheets and the floor, everything was dirty and dusty. On the outside it didn't promise anything good either. The roof had holes in it, and the wood is rotting, so much for good advertising. After my stay, I got out feeling ill as a sheep. I wonder if she realized what she got herself into, staying at an inn like that.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Wouldn't you rather sleep at my place? I've got a spare room you could use, and it will most certainly be better than that pile of misery.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Thanks, I would love to.' She said, smiling.[/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]The Council[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]A small shadowy figure stood in the middle of a small room on a circular device only slightly bigger than himself. The figure was no bigger than a dwarf, but the device made clear that it was a hologram projection by the blue glow that shone upwards and around the figure from a green circular platform. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Surrounding the figure were five kneeling people. They all wore a brightly red cloak with a green outlining, and in the middle was a yellow crest of three arrows pointing upwards. The crest of an Oathsworn Ranger. The only other things the five people had in common were their insignias, which bore the same crests as the one on their cloak, and their position. They were the Council of Five, the five leaders of the Oathsworn Rangers. They were all in a small square room, it seemed to be lit with natural light, for there is no illumination otherwise, however, the room is closed. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I assume you are all aware of her presence?' The shadowy figure opened.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The five leaders nodded.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'How she found a way out of the chaos of the Gallerian army still eludes me…' one of the kneeling leaders said. A tall, lanky man with a long beard, whose old age was only evident by the deep wrinkles on his face. He had deep silver eyes which almost seemed to glow, and a focused expression.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'That doesn't matter Rakuhin! What matters is she's in here, and she's dangerous!' Snapped another of the leaders. This low tempered man stood taller than the others, despite not bigger in size. He had an arrogant look on his hawk-like face, with blonde hair that hung low down his back and almost fully covered his long, pointy ears.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The shadowy figure merely seemed to nod. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'm glad I don't need to explain this one. I'm counting on you.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]By that, the shadowy figure vanished, and with it, the blue glow that surrounded it.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The kneeling leaders got up and exited via the only door in the room.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'The meeting was short this time.' One of them said. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'At least our assignment is clear.' Another responded. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I will instruct my Rangers at the next sunrise.' The one named Rakuhin stated. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]All of them bowed to another, and went their own ways. [/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Serena[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]The bright light of an early sunrise swiftly illuminated the room, and shone directly on my closed eyelid and in my still braided, golden blonde hair. I turned around, fighting my body's will to get up. No more than minutes later I heard some knocking on the door. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Serena, are you awake? I've got breakfast ready for you.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]That was Arithos. What was he doing up this early? Reluctantly I got up and looked around the room. It had been dark when I first entered it, and I couldn't make out most of the details of the room. I looked around to see clearly for the first time, a pretty empty room save for a desk and a chair, and a few ornaments. It was not a big room, nor was it a small room, but it was good enough for guests, I thought. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]'Are you sure you want to take in a Viera?' I had asked Arithos last night, knowing the way Vieras are treated and having experienced that first hand. Arithos merely shook his head. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Even if you were a demon, an elephant, or simply a commoner. I enjoy your company, and among these parts, you are the only one who has accomplished that. That's all that matters to me.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Somehow Arithos had smiled despite the sadness in his voice, a genuine smile. I had wondered if he was always alone…[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]After getting back in my red dress I got out of the room and joined Arithos for breakfast.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I had entered a room seemingly filled with books. Strange, it kind of reminded me of my own studies at home. There were about three book cases against the wall, filled with books, but many more books were littered across the room. Needless to say, it was a mess. On the side of the room was a table set for breakfast, next to a window, from which you can see two mountains in the distance, another house, much like his, and the forest from which they had come last night. There also was a plant next to each bookcase. All in all, this house seemed pretty lively, even with only one inhabitant.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]He had baked an egg with a slice of meat – which looks like bacon -, and two slices of bread, and a glass of milk. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'm not much of a chef, but I wanted to repay you for the lump of conjured bread you shared with me yesterday.' Arithos said, smiling. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'm sorry for the mess, I'm kind of a bookworm…' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He still stood in his white apron that covered his black and blue clothing. It was pretty strange to see someone with long, brownish, red hair pulled back over his head, and a long scar running down from his left eye to a few inches next to his mouth, standing there in his apron, spatula in hand, smiling at me as if he were just a common housefather. The sight actually made me chuckle a little as I took a seat and waited for him to do so too. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]We hadn't started eating for more than 5 minutes when there were three knocks on the wooden front door. Arithos sighed, apologized to me and got up, to answer the door. I couldn't quite hear what they were saying, so I would just wait for him to return. And when he did, the smile had vanished from his face. Worried, I had asked what happened. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I've been summoned to a meeting with the Oathsworn Rangers. I don't know the details yet, but apparently we're to be briefed about a new mission. An assassination.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]While uttering the last two words with disgust, it had darkened Arithos' expression, as if he had already been on the mission and had just returned. The frown on his usually friendly face made it evident that he really disliked that part of his occupation. To my surprise, though, he was already packing his bags, instead of continuing his breakfast. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'You're leaving?' Was all I could ask. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Yeah, when we are summoned, we are to leave everything and immediately move towards the gathering site. Please, make yourself at home, I will be back in not much longer than an hour. I'm sorry.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The words had sounded surprisingly friendly for someone with that expression… Looking back at me once more, he faked a smile and stepped out of the door, still putting on his brightly red cloak and adjusting his bow's position as he left.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]I still sat there, at the round, wooden breakfast table, trying to comprehend what just happened. We were eating in peace one moment and the next he's gone.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Make myself at home, huh?[/FONT][FONT=&quot] I have no idea how to be 'at home'. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]In silence I decided to finish my meal. A slice of bread and the remains of the egg later, I found myself wondering what to do next. At that moment a certain odour that had previously eluded me filled my nostrils. A smell of sweaty body odour. Upon realizing it was myself, I chuckled at my own ignorance. Yeah, I've been running around a lot yesterday in the warm sun, it's no surprise I've been sweating. I don't think Arithos would mind if I take a bath.[/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Arithos[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]It wasn't a cold day, but it wasn't warm either. The sun was out and there was a cold morning wind blowing. Because Eldridge Town was located in the mountains, the weather was often treacherous and sudden drizzles would appear and vanish as fast as they appeared. The town wasn't big, but wasn't small either. There were a few districts, connected by stone paths and separated by high walls. I live in the Commoner District, then there is also the King's Quarters, an enormous castle conveniently located on top of a hill, from where the King could see the entire village clearly just by looking out of the window. Then there's also the Nobles District next to the King's Quarters. Here everyone who had any influence on the King's decisions reside. Next to that is the Public District, where the inns and taverns are. And next to that is the Market Plaza where all the shopkeepers open their stalls and sell their products. The last district is the Guild District, where the guilds that assemble in Eldridge Town gather, including the Oathsworn Rangers. However, all this went past me as I walked through the market, still distracted. The merchants would let everyone on the plaza loudly know how cheap and high quality their products are, but I was too lost in thought to even pay them any attention.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Was it really alright to just leave her behind like that? [/FONT][FONT=&quot]This thought haunted me more than I would have expected. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]I was so distracted that I didn't notice the gargantuan building right in front of me. I had arrived. A twenty minute walk seemed to take only two. I stood in front of a white temple with three towers, two at the front and one at the back. There were six columns coming from the ceiling at the entrance, high enough to fit a dozen people standing on another's shoulders. The Oathsworn Rangers meeting site. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Still a little absent, I walked inside. There was one room only, big enough to house an army of hundreds, or perhaps even thousands of soldiers. With white walls and barely any decoration save for six orange banners with in the middle the crest of the Oathsworn Rangers, the room was undecorated and would be empty if not for the people gathered here. In the back of the room was a podium of some sorts on which three people were seemingly in deep discussion, for they had not noticed the ruckus in front of them. Two people had gotten themselves in an argument, which had turned violent. The two brawling figures were surrounded by a small group of bystanders, but many others paid no heed to them. Everyone assembled here, save for the three people on the podium, wore an identical cloak. They all wore an insignia with that very crest somewhere on their bodies. An Oathsworn Ranger was required to wear both the cloak and insignia at all times when on duty. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The ruckus ceased as the two brawling figures shook heavily. Panting, they both looked up to the podium to find one of the three people pointing at them both. The latter looked down at them from underneath his hood, his eyes not visible to anyone present.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I have sent a jolt of electricity through your bodies. This was merely a warning. Cease this nonsense immediately, and do not let me repeat myself again.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]His voice was deep, with no clear tone or.. emotion, yet he could be heard all over the room.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]With that, the hooded figure turned back to the two others and they appeared to have resumed their discussion.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The crowd had turned quiet and the group began to split up. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Moments later the three on the podium had stepped forward. A loud crackle filled the room, and it began to darken. The hooded figure held his right hand up, clouds seemed to spew out of it and a storm raged. Every member turned towards the podium as they held tight to whatever they could grab. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Varduk, Kanos!' the hooded figure shouted with a deafening roar, and it's echoes reverberated through the room as the storm raged. With earsplitting crackling, a thunderbolt came down from the clouds and hit the floor, barely an arm's length away from two of the people gathered.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] 'Now that we have your attention, we will begin the briefing of the next mission.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]His voice rising even above the sounds of the thunderstorm. By now, the storm had subsided and the crowd was recovering from the ordeal. Lost hats were picked up and cloaks were adjusted.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'A few days ago we noticed a certain person entering the barrier surrounding Eldridge Town. She has been wanted since she went missing during a war against the Gallerian Empire. We are targeting her because she poses a great threat to the world. She is a survivor of the Bloodbath, and the last in a bloodline of dangerously potent magicians.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The Bloodbath… Gallerian Empire.. Could they possibly mean to say Serena is the target? [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Arithos' eyes widened, his gaze downward. SHE poses a threat? That can't be right![/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Furthermore, we ask of you not to approach her alone. No, this is an order! Do not, under any circumstance approach her alone. Many before you have perished as a consequence.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Serena is kind as a child, I wonder where these guys get their information. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]I slowly raised my hand high into the air. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'My humblest of apologies for the interruption, may I speak?' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Several faces gazed at me, some thinking me a mad man, others worried, possibly for my well-being, others irritated. No one has ever dared interrupt the Council on the podium. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Speak.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The hooded figure uttered this command as if swatting a fly, with a hint of impatience. 'During my time off duty, I met with a young lady named Serena Ryner. We spent some time together and she currently lodges at my home. I suspect this lady is our current target since her story matches your description.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'It is indeed that person that we speak of. You say you are close to her?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I simply nodded, then gathered enough courage to speak up.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Yes, I am.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Very well, that makes things easier. Bring her here.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]And with that, the three figures vanished in a cloud of smoke. The meeting was over and the order was clear. The crowd slowly started to break up again. Several members were looking at me as they were whispering to one another. Others thought I wouldn't notice them if they would simply look at me in the corner of their eyes. At least I know that I'll most likely be the topic of the day. Oh how I wish I was back under my tree again.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The walk back home was long, I wasn't very pleased with the order. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I have my doubts that Serena would be capable of such things. She seems much too.. tender, as if she wouldn't hurt a fly. At least I know I have to do what I have to do, so now the question is how. I can't just barge in and tell her she's a wanted woman, or that the meeting was about her. But… If what the Council says is true, she would kill me right where I stand. Somehow I have to convince her to come along without raising suspicion. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I would hate to lie, but I think I have no choice. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]I've reached home still trying to decide the best course of action. When I opened the door, I found Serena reading 'City in Ruins', one of my books about a Dwarven city built completely underground several centuries ago, now abandoned and decayed. I felt like just looking at her would be betrayal. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Welcome back!' she said, looking up from her book with a smile on her face, which instantly faded as soon as she read the mood. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What's wrong, Arithos? You look beat.' [/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Serena[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]Arithos' expression had been grim ever since he came back. I wonder what kind of order he got, he did say it was an assassination and he looked as though he really hated that part of his job. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]We sat in silence, I was sat on a chair next to one of his bookshelves, reading a book while Arithos sat at his table at the other side of the room, gazing out of the window. We hadn't spoken a word since he got back. Finally, I couldn't stand the silence anymore.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'So what did happen at that meeting? You look even worse than before you left. Anything I can do to help?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He looked at me, first with an annoyed frown, but then that changed to concern. He didn't look away, just sat there quietly. Then he nodded as if agreeing to something in his mind.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'They mentioned you. They…'
He paused.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'They want me to bring you to the gathering site.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Surprised by the sudden announcement, I couldn't help but ask him why, despite knowing the answer myself.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'They said you are a threat, that you are the last in a bloodline of "dangerously potent" magicians.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]As expected, wherever I go, I will be hunted. So it has always been, and so it always will be. My past will always haunt my future.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Serena, tell me honestly. Is what they say true? Are you really dangerous? To me you look nothing more than an ordinary girl, I can't possibly imagine..'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'It's true.' I interrupted him. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What they say is true. Do you remember yesterday, when I told you about my destroyed hometown? Back then I couldn't stand watching my family get killed in front of me. I lost control. The army that had ravaged and plundered my town was wiped out by me. I've been hunted ever since.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos had looked at me in disbelief. We sat there for a moment, completely silent and just staring at one another.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'll go.' I finally said. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'If you promise me that we return to the valley we were in yesterday afterwards.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos shook his head at my proposal.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'No, Serena, I can't promise you that. Haven't you heard of the Oathsworn Rangers? We're mercenaries. Our… targets… only rarely walk away alive. And since they consider you a threat, I'm sure they'll…'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos couldn't stand to finish that sentence, but I knew what he meant. I had read stories about the Rangers, an elite team specialized in ambushes, assassination, theft and small skirmishes. They took orders from the Council of Five, a group of people with powers that equalled a country. Their role in the current war cannot be denied.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I know what awaits me, but I'm not planning to die yet. If they wish to see me, then so be it. I've been running, hiding and fighting my entire life. I am well prepared for this.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]My determination seemed to surprise Arithos, but rather than happy or sad, he looked as though he pitied me. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What are you planning to do?' He finally asked.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'm not sure. We'll see. But, I'll only go if you promise me to take me back to the valley where we met.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I finally managed a smile, but Arithos' expression still had not changed. Finally he nodded, and got up. He looked outside, still absent-minded, then suddenly turned his gaze back at me.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Do you have a coat by the way? It's colder than it was yesterday.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He finally smiled for the first time since he left to the meeting.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Here, I'll get you a spare coat, I have one in the back.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He disappeared into a room next to the one I slept in, and came back a minute later with a long orange coat. It looked like a robe I used to wear back in my hometown, when Father was teaching me in wizardry. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Don't mind the hideous colour, I bought it for the purpose of selling it later, but I hadn't gotten around to do that yet.' He then said.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Oh, I like it.' I said as I took the coat and put it on me.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos put his cloak and bow back on and stepped outside, his expression grim once more. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I quietly followed him as we walked to the gathering site. On our way there, we didn't say a word, the only sound came from our footsteps on the stone path. He was still lost in thought, and I was trying not to get lost. The town had a difficult layout, there were paths and houses everywhere and it all looked the same, apart from the market I walked past yesterday. I must remember to buy Arithos something later, as a thanks for letting me stay over. To my surprise, we walked right by the market I was just thinking of.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Hey, Arithos! Hold on, I have to do something. Stay here ok?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos nodded and sat down under a tree, looking up at the sky. Meanwhile I entered the market plaza and looked around the various stalls. The stalls were lined up on the side of the plaza and formed a circle. Between each stall was a path that led to another part of town. There was a total of seven stalls. One sold fruit, and the one on the right of it sold vegetables. Left of a fruit stall was a meat stall. There were two clothing stalls, the one on the left sold extravagant clothing, with much detail and attributes. The one next to it sold only plain and simple clothes. The stall next to Arithos sold potions and medicine. It probably belonged to the apothecary I visited yesterday. The last stall sold weapons. Axes, swords, bows, shields, daggers. Perfect. He is an archer, so he'll probably be happy with a new bow, since his looks pretty worn out and damaged. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Good morning, young lady! Might I interest you in a fine piece of weaponry for a fine lady?' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The old blacksmith proudly waved his arms over his merchandise, his eyes gleaming with pride and moustache dancing on his face with every word he said.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'May I see the finest bow of your craft, please?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The old merchant held his hand under his chin as he looked me over.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What is the price you are willing to pay?' He then asked.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Shit, in my excitement I forgot I didn't even have enough money to stay at a decent inn. I hope I can get something nice with what I have.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I have 60 gold coins and 83 silver.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The old merchant looked irritated.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Well, you sure can't afford my finest craft, but this here is a wooden long bow reinforced with steel. It's durable and light, will last for many year. It only costs 40 gold coins.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]40 gold coins, that's a lot for a piece of wood and a little bit of steel. I know steel is rare in this area, but there is plenty of wood around these parts. Let's see if I can get the price down a little.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I know that especially around here there is plenty of wood. You can't tell me a material as common as that would be hard to get. And I happen to know that there is a steel mine not far from here. The materials shouldn't be worth that much.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]By now the old merchant looked more and more irritated, but I went on.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'In raw materials the price shouldn't exceed more than 10 gold coins, but looking at this stall I can tell you take your work seriously. I'll pay you 20 gold for the bow.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Once again the old merchant rubbed his chin, and studied me intensely. His serious look faded and he chuckled.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I see, you have a good eye for detail, young lady!' He said.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'All right. I'll give you the bow for 25 gold coins, but that's the lowest I'll go. This bow took me nearly a week to carve out of a fallen 1000 year old oak tree.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I nodded and paid the agreed price, thanked the old merchant and walked back to Arithos. I hope this will also cheer him up a little.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I walked back to Arithos, with the bow held out in front of me. He didn't see me coming. Good. I can surprise him like this. When Arithos finally looked up, his eyes widened, then he frowned.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I didn't know you could shoot.' He said, surprised. I chuckled.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I can't. You're the archer here. It's a thank you for letting me stay over.' I said as I handed him the bow.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'You mean that you bought it for me? I don't know what to say… But, thanks. It's light.' Arithos held it out in front of him as he looked at the wood and pulled the string. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Hold on, let me see the bow quickly. Hold it out in front of you with the string towards me.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Arithos obeyed, and I stuck out my hands as I muttered an incantation. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Kor za'an he[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]My hands started to glow, and a soft light surrounded the bow. Arithos only watched in awe. A few seconds later the light dissipated and I put down my hands.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I've placed a spell on the bow, which reinforces the string and makes the bow more flexible. The old merchant said it's a very durable bow, but this spell adds even more to its natural durability.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Thanks, Serena. This means a lot to me.' Arithos said, the smile back on his face. I really do like him more when he is laughing. I'm glad I bought it.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Right, let's go, Serena.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Sure.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]As we walked, Arithos had not lifted his gaze even once from the bow I bought him.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I can't wait to test it out.' He said when he noticed me looking at him.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Thanks again, Serena.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]His smile faded again, however, when we arrived at the gargantuan building that looked like a temple. [/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Venn[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]Trouble is stirring up in the Eastern Region, I can sense it.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]With a wave of a purple hand, an orb floated towards the Elven-like man. He placed his scarred right hand on the orb and closed his eyes. Immediately his head was filled with the image of the Eastern Region. The image shifts towards the Khalos Mountains. The image shifts again, this time towards the Valley of Lost Hope. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I can see you…[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He took his scarred hand off the orb, and opened his eyes. The Elven-like man coughed and was out of breath, panting heavily. He was sweating and hungry and thirsty. A voice had spoken into his mind with a whisper louder than a siege cannon and filled with madness. This is ancient and strong magic. With a wave of his right hand he dismissed the orb, then drew a circle in the air with his index finger. The motion summoned a book onto his brown wooden desk. A thick, worn out book with black shaft, in the middle nothing but the letter A carved into the leather. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Could it be?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The Elven-like man spread his still shaking purple hand and the book opened. With another wave the pages flipped over one by one. His green eyes started to glow and his thick green eyebrows frowned. After a few moments, he relaxed again and the glow faded. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I see.' He finally spoke to himself.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]His voice deep, ragged. His green eyes peering across the circular room. It was filled with books and rolls of parchment and nothing else, save his desk and chair. The light came from a summoned ball of light, radiating a dim, blue light. His room had no windows and no door.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He leaned back in his wooden chair, decorated with a soft grey bear skin. For a few moments he sat still, pondering. He then slammed his fist on his desk and got up.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I must warn the Emperor, and notify the Ni'vess' He told himself.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Ni'vess, elven tongue for 'racial leader.' It was written that, In the early times, after the Great Divide 400 years ago, the Elves suggested each race to have a leader to speak for their race. In times of need, the Ni'vess could call upon each other. Every race agreed despite their intolerance towards another , except the Mintra. "Lesser creatures would just get in our way." The Mintra's Overlord, Arak Harsa had said. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]In reality, it were the cunning humans who were against the Mintra joining the Ni'vess, and talked the other races into agreeing with their selfish decision. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Soon after, the world divided, every race spread across the continent, unable to live alongside another. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The purple elven-like figure stood up and turned to the wall behind him. He drew a circle in the air the size of his torso with his index finger.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Rogg naz ri vuu[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. He muttered under his breath.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]A mixture of red, purple and green lights appeared where his finger had drawn the circle, and in the middle an image formed. There were red mountains, a clear blue sky above and a green forest below. The purple Elven-like man stepped entered the circle and found himself at the exact spot in the image. The sudden gust of wind blew his long straight green hair in his face.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]He stood on a small ridge high up in the mountains. Behind him was nothing more than a wall of red rock, in front of him was a 1000 feet drop. To his right was a downward slope which he used to move down the mountain. After what seemed like but a few seconds, the Elven-like man stood at the foot of the mountain and started into the forest. He was used to walking here, this was his home. He lives inside a mountain he raised himself, using extremely powerful magic.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Not half a day passed when the Elven-like man reached a gate surrounded by two great stone walls that rose high above the trees, and encircled the entire city. Looking up at these walls makes one realize how small he really is. The gate was guarded by four guards; two at the gate and two on top of the wall.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The gate opened and the two guards kneeled down.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'My Lord,' One of the guards said. 'Our scout had seen you heading this way. The Emperor has been notified, you can head to his palace whenever you want.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The Elven-like man waved his hand, gesturing the guard to stand up.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'There is no need to be so formal, my fellow man.' The Elven-like man said with a humble tone to his deep and rugged voice.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Once the guard stood face-to-face again, he continued.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Thank you for notifying the Emperor, this saves precious time that, unfortunately, is not in spare.' He grimly spoke. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Walking through the gate revealed a city mainly built with yellow stone. The wall on the side rising high above the buildings. The path also paved with stone, but with a layer of sand that entered Masius together with all the merchants and travellers who passed through the gate.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]With short paces he walked down the crowded road, where salesmen tried to vendor their products, housewives did their shopping and children played. But he paid none of this any mind. There was only one thing on his mind and that was to meet the Emperor.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]'My good friend Venn!' a jolly old man shouted at the Elven-like man as he entered the room filled with just a desk and some bookshelves. The desk was piling over with books and scrolls, leaving only place for his ink and feather. Behind the jolly old man sitting behind his desk was a window that displayed a view of the entire city.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Emperor Lon.' Venn said as he kneeled down. 'I see you still have enough time to get a good meal and a lot of ale, Emperor.' Venn pointed at the Emperor's round belly.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'And I see you still don't go out often, you look as pale as ever,' Emperor Lon retorted.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Both laughed a little, but swiftly the mood darkened. The Emperor squinted his eyes.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'It has been a while since you last visited. Around the time the Great War broke out, I believe? What brings you here now?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Venn said nothing and walked to the window.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Sadly I come again bearing grim news,' he finally said. 'I felt the presence of evil in the Valley of Lost Hope, a valley located just outside Eldridge Town in the Eastern Region.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The Emperor stood up from his chair and joined Venn at the window and Venn continued.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Upon investigating, it sensed my magic and distorted it. While doing that, it also managed to speak to me. Its magical aura felt familiar, and very strong. I was certain I recognized his aura, so I did some reading. What I found out is staggering, Lon.' Venn drew the circle in the air, and the black book fell down into his hand. 'This book tells Argoth, a Viera fiend with only malicious intent. I had defeated it not even 50 years back, that's why he felt so familiar.'[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The Emperor nodded, still staring out of the window, looking over his city.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'm sure you're not just here for a bedtime story, Venn. Why is this "Argoth" enough of a threat to drive you to my city? To me?' The Emperor said without looking away from his city.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'It will become clear if you read the book. Argoth and I fought 50 years back, but he was never able to so much as scratch me, and taking his lowly life didn't require so much as a flick of a finger. His magical aura was weak, the only real strength he had was his originality in torturing people. However, in less than 50 years' time he's managed to not only disrupt my magic, but cast counter magic as well. This growth in power is most unnatural, even to the Viera, even to the Elves. I fear there is more going on than this. And Argoth needs to be dealt with, again. Although I fear I cannot do it alone.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Should I prepare my soldiers and urge the other human leaders to do the same?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Only the very strongest you have. If I am indeed no match for Argoth right now, then most of your men will be nothing but mere puppets to him. And if my suspicions are correct, his resurrection won't be the last. We will need all the men we can spare.' Venn looked over at Emperor Lon who was trembling and plucked at his long, white beard, naturally shocked by this disgruntling news.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I understand.' Emperor Lon finally said softly. 'By the Gods, Venn! Once in a while, it would do an old man good to be brought some ale instead of such grim news.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Venn nodded in agreement. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'We should drink soon, my friend. But now, we must defeat Argoth. If we don't, I fear for the people in the Eastern Kingdom. I must go now, I came here out of personal concern, but I have things I must do. Be well, my friend. I trust in your wisdom.' he said as he walked away, back to the door. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Venn had almost left the room when he turned around and added: 'Oh, I forgot to ask, could you do me a favour?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Emperor Lon, still standing at the window gazing at the city didn't move.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What is it?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Could you please contact the High King in my stead? I wish to request an audience.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I'll see what I can do. The High King is stubborn, if he declines there is nothing I can do for you.' The Emperor wasn't surprised at Venn's request. He had asked for an audience with the High King before, and Emperor Lon had always requested it in Venn's stead.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Venn nodded even though he knew Emperor Lon couldn't tell.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Thank you, my friend,' Venn said.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Be safe, Venn.' The Emperor had not looked at Venn when he waved him out. Venn knew the Emperor was already lost in thought considering the countless options, possibilities and outcomes. The Emperor's strategic mind and advanced tactics are but one of his many talents. He can come up with hundreds of ideas immediately, but his real talent lies in picking the right one. It was a real shame he was not the High King, he was certainly fit to be one.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]And so Venn departed, leaving the Emperor behind him. [/FONT]

Spoiler:

[FONT=&quot]Arithos[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]*****[/FONT]​

[FONT=&quot]'I have a bad feeling, Serena. The men I serve, the Council, are dangerous men. Just, yes, but frightening. And if they want you, then what does that make you? You're just a woman, from what I've seen.' [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]We were on our way to the court, where the Council had requested I bring Serena. After what I've said, Serena looked annoyed, but then her expression softened. She sighed.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Listen, Arithos. There's something you must know before we go in there.' Serena's tone was serious and her look stern. It tensed me a little.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'What would that be?' My voice a little more nervous than I intended.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I know why they are after me. Well, I'm pretty sure, at least. The reason I'm wandering, as you know, is because my hometown was destroyed by the Gallerians.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Yes, you've told me this. What does that have to do with-'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Let me speak, Arithos.' She interrupted. 'That war, which was noted in the annals of history as "The Bloodbath", was indeed a massacre, but not the one the books speak of. My clan, the Frostmoon Clan, worship the Goddess of the Night, Nula, She who watches over us in the dead of night. The Khalnir of Galleria worship the Frozen God Kain, He who was frozen by Nula aeons far in the past. The Khalnir of Galleria of the West and the Viera in the Frostmoon Clan of Winterfall in the North had never been on good terms. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Then, out of the blue, a force of thousands of Khalnir soldiers appeared at our border. There has never been a declaration of War, they just attacked. Our force was outnumbered, but we had Nula protecting us. After a night and a day of battle, we emerged victorious. Only twenty-one of us, and hundreds of Khalnir remained, but they retreated. We thought it to be over. We were exhausted, fatigued, injured, but so were the Khalnir.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Serena paused.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'We thought it was over, we tended to the injured and recovered our losses. But two nights after, the remaining Khalnir returned. We were too tired to fight, and our spells grew weak. But the Khalnir…the Khalnir were stronger. And worse, now they also wielded magic. Somehow in merely two nights and one day time they learned how to wield devastating magic, and they were in perfect condition too. We had no chance. Twenty of our people fell that night, but the Khalnir only took minor losses. We had no chance.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Tears were welling up in her eyes, and her breath was getting heavy. This story took its toll on her, and this is probably the first time she had told it out loud. I listened silently, taking in this information. This was indeed not how it was written. And now it makes sense how the strategically inferior Khalnir would have been able to overpower the Vieras to such extend. But how did they come back so healthy?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Arithos, the reason I am being hunted down to this day, is because I know what really happened. They must have used some dark magic rituals on their soldiers to grant them this strength.'[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]It makes sense. If the Ni'vess find out about the use of dark magic, one of the biggest crimes one could commit, a massive war would break out, one the Khalnir of Galleria would surely lose. And if that is the case, it's no wonder they would hire mercenaries like us to find her. To do their dirty work for them.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I understand, Serena. I can see why the Rangers would be hired to track you down, but why didn't you run when I said you were my assignment?'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I have no intention of dying, not here at least. That's why I'm telling you this now.' She straightened. 'I suggest you turn back right now. When I go inside, your Council will be awaiting. I'm going to convince them to let me go – but don't misunderstand, I am not going to beg. Whether they accept or not, I will be walking out of this temple again.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]She's going to fight the Council? Is she mad?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'The Council is not an opponent anyone can handle! They're monsters! Their magic rivals that of the Ni'vess, their bloodlust rivals that of the Nightwalkers and their strength far surpasses the Khalnir. You would merely be throwing your life away by defying them.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I repeat, Arithos Marin. I suggest you turn back right here, so that you can continue living in peace as a Ranger. I don't want you to share in my fate as a jiran, as a traitor. I thank you for your company, Arithos, but now we must part ways.' She quickly turned to hide her tears and walked inside, leaving me standing there. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Serena! Wait, curse you! You're being hunted down for information you possess, the truth you told me. I have spent two days with you. If this information is as valuable as it sounds, then don't you think they wouldn't come after me as well? I mean, they will want to exclude every risk of the truth coming out – everyone you meet would be hunted and silenced! Whether I want it or not, by meeting you, I already shared in your fate. So no. I shan't turn back. You have my bow, Serena Ryner. Plus, I had been looking for an excuse to leave town anyway. The people here irritate me to no end.'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]A smile appeared on her face after the last comment. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Good thing she's so easy to convince. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]At last, she nodded and gestured me to follow.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Silently, we continued until we entered the great hall where the meeting was held. Somehow the hall looks even larger without all the Rangers present. It makes me wonder how the room even fit inside the building. Serena couldn't help but look around her, gaze in awe at the ceiling that was high above them. From it hung a chandelier, made of glass and metal, supporting at least a dozen candles. Along with every torch on the wall, enough to illuminate the entire hall in the dead of night. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]On the stage, one of the Council had stood, waiting. It was the one who spoke during the meeting. From up close, I could recognize his features. It was Rakuhin Shen, the oldest member of the Council. His age, however, uncontested by his prowess in battle, both physical and magical. Master Shen was often involved with Rangers during missions, accompanying and guiding parties. You needed talent to be an Oathsworn Ranger, but for talent to develop, you would need an adequate Master to teach you. Master Shen was a man of many skills, and could teach anything from tracking to spellweaving, and everything in between. He is wearing a bright orange robe and on his chest the insignia of the Rangers. On his back he wears a deep red cloak with green outlining – the same one I'm wearing.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'You did well taking her here, young Ranger. You completed your mission swiftly and accurately, and you shall be rewarded as such.' Master Shen opened.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Master Shen, I ask you to reconsider. She really means no harm. She is simply lost, her home was des-'[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'I will not have any of this, young Ranger! You know damn well how we operate: We assign you a job, you fulfil it. Now leave, Ranger. I have business with Serena.' Master Shen's voice went heavy and vibrating. It penetrated through the entire room and slammed my eardrums.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Master Shen,' Serena opened as she bowed down. 'I have no evil desire. I only seek to travel.' She added.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Enough of this nonsense. Arithos, you made the mistake of disappointing me. Now, get out of my sight. As for you, Serena Ryner, we have orders to execute you.'[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]The room flared a brilliant white so intense I went temporarily blind. It was only for a short moment, but when I could see again, he had Serena on her knees, holding her hands tight behind her back right next to me. By reflex, I grabbed my bow and notched an arrow. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Raising your bow towards me, however, is a bigger mistake. Put it down and I shall overlook this. Release the arrow, and the consequences will be dire.' Master Shen said. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Akun!' Serena shouted as she released a shockwave strong enough to create a fissure that spit the ground in two. For a second, Master Shen struggled to keep his balance and loosened his grip on Serena. Using the spur of the moment she cast another spell and moved herself to a safe distance behind me. By reflex I released my arrow, but it was deflected by a single wave of a hand by Master Shen. In that moment, Serena cast another spell and Master Shen's clothes and hair ignited in deep blue flames. A short scream of agony escaped Master Shen's tongue before he dispelled the flames. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'You disappoint me, Ranger! For you to attack your Master is unforgivable!' The age lines in Master Shen's face now more evident than ever. His voice turned deep and loud as thunder. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Inra!'[/FONT][FONT=&quot] Master Shen's shout produced a jolt of lightning that coursed through my body. My right arm went numb and I dropped my bow, but Serena reacted and cast a spell that froze the ground beneath Master Shen's feat. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The temperature in the room dropped drastically, and snow began to fall. The ice had almost reached my body when I felt myself being lifted from the ground. Serena had cast a levitation spell.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Iyak, zakan' Serena softly muttered as the falling snow froze in the air. The tiny ice particles in the snow reformed and turned into tiny little spears that now flung towards Master Shen. In the short moment between the two spells, Serena cast a barrier surrounding us both. The snow spears were pelting against the barrier, but apparently Master Shen had the same idea. In that same moment, Master Shen cast another spell that heated up the floor, melting the ice. Before Serena could react, he cast a spell that created a gale that pulled us towards it. My body was still numb from the attack earlier, and I was being dragged into it. Master Shen then flung a small fireball into the gale, which was enough to heat it up completely, turning it into a flaming tornado. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Nura helva!' Serena shouted as I was flung away from the tornado, landing softly on the watery ground. The numbness in my body faded and as if by calculation I landed next to my bow. I instantly picked up my bow and notched another arrow, while Serena cast another spell. Chains formed around Master Shen's feet and hands, and before I noticed I had released the arrow. It sunk into Master Shen's left shoulder and he staggered. The chains were instantly dispelled, but the wound slowed down his tongue. With a wave of his right hand he flung my bow out of my hands and into the wall. The sudden burst of force must have broken my arm, I couldn't make it move. With another swing of his arm Master Shen swung Serena into the wall behind her. Her head was bleeding, her eyes closed. She didn't move.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]The blood from Master Shen's wound dripped on the floor. With his right hand, he reached into his robe and took out a silver dagger. In a sudden burst of speed he stood beside Serena and impaled her right arm into the ground. She screamed in agony and instinctively cast a spell that blast Master Shen away with a mighty roar. With tears in her eyes she took out the dagger, and with another burst of speed she clashed with Master Shen, who in that same instant recovered and drew another dagger to parry the attack. The sound of clashing metal filled the room and the two took back their distance. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]By now I knew I could do nothing to be of aid. My right arm is broken, and they move so swiftly my eyes can hardly follow them.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'Nura lisan' Serena muttered softly, as she flung herself towards Master Shen and right before she was about to hit him, she vanished. Master Shen had already put up a defensive shield to deflect the attack, but Serena instantly reappeared behind him, at the shield's weak point. With a decisive blow, the shield shattered and the dagger penetrated Master Shen's back. He coughed up blood and his body stiffened, his back arcing forward, his body leaning backward. His eyes were open wide. Serena took out the dagger and, with one more slice through Master Shen's neck, he fell to the ground.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]It's over. We survived a confrontation with one of the Council…[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]My legs gave in. I could no longer stand and I fell to the ground. Serena slowly walked towards me. She was wavering, obviously exhausted from the devastating amount of energy she used up to cast that magnificent magic. I've never been this impressed at anything in my life. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I'm glad she's on my side.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] I softly cursed myself for this thought, but waved it off quickly. I should trust her. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]'We did it, Arithos.' She whispered as she dropped herself next to me. A faint smile rose upon her face as she lost consciousness. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]With my left arm, I took her by the waist and lifted her over my shoulder.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]But…what now? If we stay here, the Council will catch up on us, but with Serena in this condition we can't leave either…[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]With one last look on Master Rakuhin Shen's corpse and a whisper of apology, I turned around and exited the building. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]It won't be long until they'll start looking for us – especially with all the commotion we've caused. I need to find a place to hide.[/FONT]

If you have read everything up to this point, you have my most sincere gratitude.
Now, since I've posted all the sections that compose chapter one I can discuss my problem a bit more freely.

The direction of the story: I want it to be about Arithos and Serena being on the run; hunted down by the Rangers and the Council. In the meantime, Venn will travel to the capital City to relay a message to all Racial Leaders. Central to this chapter is an encounter between Argoth's minions and Arithos and Serena.

So as an example: The new chapter opens with Arithos and Serena sitting by a campfire in the forest out of town. Serena wakes up, they discuss what had just happened and what's going to happen. Venn will travel to the North, to the center of Nalmoreden to a messenger outpost, and send out messengers to every capital, then he'll go back South-East and travel to the High King.

That'smy plan for chapter two so far. However, doesn't it all sound a bit stale? The entire world sounds a bit stale. Should I put some focus on the other races as well?
I'd want to avoid the story to focus on Arithos and Serena completely, even though they're the protagonists. How should I do this?
I also am not planning to "ship" Arithos and Serena.
Please let me know if you need more clues or information, any feedback at all is welcome and advice is highly appreciated.

 

[Phantom1]

Hmm, this might be better suited for the Lounge part of FF&W. This area is for stories being posted.

My advice though would be this. We can't write it for you. The best I could say would be to use a third party's perspective. But again we can't write it for you. It's a part of being a writer is finding your own way through things.

 

[HairyLoco]

Ah, I'm sorry I must have phrased myself wrongly. I never wanted anyone else to write the story for me, I'm simply looking for advice on how to pick up on the story now, in order to keep it interesting.

While on that, I'm looking for opinions on what I have currently written. Is there anything I can improve on? Are there any sections you dislike? Is it clear?

Those are my questions and reasons for posting.

 

[Phantom1]

Ah, I'm sorry I must have phrased myself wrongly. I never wanted anyone else to write the story for me, I'm simply looking for advice on how to pick up on the story now, in order to keep it interesting.

See, that's the thing, that's your job as a writer. I gave an idea in my last post, but that's all I can give. I didn't mean to have someone physically write your story for you, I meant that if people give you all the ideas on how to 'keep it interesting', then it's really not your story, now is it? Writer's block, running into corners, it's all part of the job.

I'm not commenting on the sections because technically it's against the guidelines for the area to not post an entire chapter.

 

[HairyLoco]

See, that's the thing, that's your job as a writer. I gave an idea in my last post, but that's all I can give. I didn't mean to have someone physically write your story for you, I meant that if people give you all the ideas on how to 'keep it interesting', then it's really not your story, now is it? Writer's block, running into corners, it's all part of the job.

I'm not commenting on the sections because technically it's against the guidelines for the area to not post an entire chapter.

I understand. In that case, my post still has very little use for me. If you'd like, please take it down.

 

[Phantom1]

I understand. In that case, my post still has very little use for me. If you'd like, please take it down.

You keep looking over the advice that I did give. So I'll say it again, third party's perspective.

And it doesn't have to be deleted. Just ask for it to be moved. It isn't an issue really.

 

[HairyLoco]

You keep looking over the advice that I did give. So I'll say it again, third party's perspective.

And it doesn't have to be deleted. Just ask for it to be moved. It isn't an issue really.

It just now dawned on me what you meant. I feel like hitting my head against the wall - but my story would suffer if I did. ;)
First I thought you meant exactly to ask others (hence third party), but now I think you mean to write in a third party's perspective, rather than first person, is that correct?

I've spoken with Nolafus and we decided that my post is fit for FF&W, however, I've now edited my original post to make my questions some more feedback related rather than advice related.

 

[Phantom1]

It just now dawned on me what you meant. I feel like hitting my head against the wall - but my story would suffer if I did. ;)
First I thought you meant exactly to ask others (hence third party), but now I think you mean to write in a third party's perspective, rather than first person, is that correct?

I've spoken with Nolafus and we decided that my post is fit for FF&W, however, I've now edited my original post to make my questions some more feedback related rather than advice related.

I'm not talking the actual perspecitve, but, rather, having a third party experience the events. Create a character or work with existing characters that work with your other characters that you feel are getting too much lime light.

 

[HairyLoco]

I'm not talking the actual perspecitve, but, rather, having a third party experience the events. Create a character or work with existing characters that work with your other characters that you feel are getting too much lime light.

Ahh like so. That's actually something I hadn't thought about at all.
I'll have to think about how to work this, but this is really nice advice thank you very much!