For enter hero name, all you need to do is install the patch correctly and then choose in your event "Enter Hero Name," select the hero you want to name, and click OK. The End.
As for changing your hero's sprite, all you need to do is in your event choose the command, "Change Hero Walk GFX," choose the hero you want to set, and then choose the new graphic. This can be combined with the command "Show Choice" that enables the player to make a decision in the game (Yes/No, True/False) with up to four choices. In field 1 you can enter "Male" and in the second field "Female." In the handler for each decision put the graphic change command. That way when they select "Male" the sprite of the character is male, and when they click "Female" they play as a female character. Capiche?
Here's sample code for the intro:
<>Message: Hello, I'm Oak and welcome to the world of Pokemon!
<>Message: Erm, what was your name again?
<>Enter Hero Name: [Choose initial name in database [F8])
<>What gender are you?
<>Show Choice: Male/Female
:[Male]Case
<>Change Hero's Walk Graphic : [Inital Name]->[file of new sprite]-1 Set
<>
:[Female]Case
<>Change Hero's Walk Graphic: [Initial Name]->[file of new female sprite]-1 Set
<>
:END Case
<>
That's it! Of course that's the basics and it can get more complecated. Just make sure you have the charaset (sprite) for Male and Female. Here's a start:
http://gamingw.net/file/resource/makers/rm2k/character/pokemontrainers.png
Just let me know if you don't understand something!