Fanfiction Lounge

[.Ozymandias]

Have you ever written a part of a story and liked it, but when you read over it again you hated it and changed it completely?

All the time! I am very bad for doing this with stuff I've written a while ago and decide to pick up again after a few months break from it - I'm currently on a third rewrite of one fic on my ff.net profile, much to the entertainment of the OC in this story.

Your character has a LiveJournal. How about giving us a sample entry?

Elise - Just when I thought I actually understood something, it jumped in the air and ran around my bedroom naked and screaming, and I realised that I will never understand everything in this life. Work is boring and long, and I have good reason to believe that Venusaur and Swampert are plotting my demise. Gardevoir has just pointed out to me that you aren't paranoid unless people really are out to get you. A comforting thought to go to sleep with, no?

 

[An-chan]

Did it ever occur to you as kind of funny that PFF&P is in "Alternative Pokémon Discussions" as opposed to Other Writing's "Creative Discussions"?
I kind of found it funny when I realized it. I don't know why.

Have you ever written a part of a story and liked it, but when you read over it again you hated it and changed it completely?

A basillion multi-gilliard times. But that's how you improve, right? I'm actually writing several (intended) actual books on the moment, and I take full advantage of that phenomenon. I write scenes, then stop writing for a week or a month, after which I read the thing I wrote. Because it's totally hateable by then, I fix it and modify it to be good again. After a few cycles like that, it stops being hateable when you go back. Kind of like how wine matures over time...

Anyway, it happens to me all the freaking time and I don't know what I'd do if it didn't.

On another note, I also proofread my texts at least two times. That also gives you chances to fix mistakes and make it all a lot better. Of course, when writing in English, I tend not to notice all my mistakes and awkward sentences. That's why I need you guys.

...I have a math test tomorrow ;_; Not that I don't like math, but I definitely do not like math tests! I always screw up in some stupid way... I'm not that good in proofreading my math, really.

 

[Heart's Soul]

Have you ever written a part of a story and liked it, but when you read over it again you hated it and changed it completely?

I never changed it, because I don't have enough time. ROM Lists and my fanfiction cancel each other out.

 

[txteclipse]

Have you ever written a part of a story and liked it, but when you read over it again you hated it and changed it completely?

I typically rewrite each of my chapters three times or so. And that's full-blown rewrites, not edits. So yeah.

 

[Gummy]

Have you ever written a part of a story and liked it, but when you read over it again you hated it and changed it completely?

This is why the fifth chapter of Divine Intervention was never completed. I got about half-way through it around three of four times before trashing the entire thing. Funny thing is, I'm still thinking up ideas for that fic.

 

[Heart's Soul]

I now officially want to force my own body to create a new chapter instead of Chapter 1. Back then, I had no idea who Neo was, although his personality rarely changed... I'll still keep the 2nd part, though... it's mostly in the beginning.

 

[Astinus]

I have a question that came to me when I was writing earlier today in work.

One of the things that I apparently like writing about is friendships/relationships where one half of the couple has trust issues. (One is lied to all his life; the other is just never around humans, and had her trust broken by her family.) The other half of the couple is the only one/one of the very few that the untrusting half actually trusts.

Now, the part that made me want to ask this question is when the untrusting half of the friendship gets lost in town, and she doesn't want to ask for directions to find her friend because she doesn't trust the people in the town. I got stuck on this part because I was writing this part while standing next to a picture of the Twilight movie, and so unhealthy dependent relationships were on my mind.

So my question is: How does one write a relationship where one half of the couple sees the other half as a "security" without making the relationship sound like an unhealthy one?

-

On an unrelated warning note: I won't be around at all next week. Work has increased my hours to almost full-time, and I'm going to be rather ragey all next week.

 

[Bay]

Hm, tough one. I would say that the person that has trust issues can use their friend as security for some time, but they to eventually be able to open up more about their feelings to more people. Also, that other person has to tell them that they need to learn to trust more. That's the power of character development. :)

Also Astinus, hope things will go well at work next week!

 

[txteclipse]

So my question is: How does one write a relationship where one half of the couple sees the other half as a "security" without making the relationship sound like an unhealthy one?

Erm. Well, if one depends on the other for security, and the other in turn depends on the one for something else, you have a healthy give-and-take relationship. I don't really understand the question, I guess.

 

[JX Valentine]

So my question is: How does one write a relationship where one half of the couple sees the other half as a "security" without making the relationship sound like an unhealthy one?

As a warning, half asleep right now, so if I don't make sense, sorry.

That said, the key to making this sound like a healthy relationship is partly in how the other person (the one being seen as a security) reacts. If the person takes advantage of the first person's trust, then, no, it's not healthy. If the person babies (read: smothers) the one in need of security, then it's still not healthy. If the person does something in the middle, where they assume that it's a normal relationship and/or acts as a supporting pillar to say, "Look, I know you have trust issues. We're going to do this so you can work through your issues and become a better person or at least not be a parasite to me," then it's somewhat healthier.

Although everyone wants to have reassurances of security in a relationship (even on a subconscious level), your character seem a bit on the messed up side, so your relationship may come off as ****ed up either way just because the people involved will be ****ed up. However, the difference between Twilight and writing a believable relationship is trying to avoid the abusive/submissive, I-need-security-so-I'm-going-to-cling-the-crap-out-of-you kind of situation and having at least one person in the relationship serve as a guide and friend, not as a dom.

Likewise, it's usually not a good idea to have the submissive person be overly clingy to the only person she trusts because, really, that makes it look like she's some crazy stalker. Unless she actually is, at which point... um, yeah. (Hello, Anthy.) In any case, remember that the kids won't die if you separate them. Unless they're stupid. Or, um, lost in a city. (Maybe she finds a map? After all, it sounds like she'd also be a bit more independent.)

 

[Astinus]

Thanks for the replies, everyone.

Hm, tough one. I would say that the person that has trust issues can use their friend as security for some time, but they to eventually be able to open up more about their feelings to more people. Also, that other person has to tell them that they need to learn to trust more. That's the power of character development.

That's actually what happens in the fanfic I got stuck in (which would be Lucidity). Main character learns that not everyone is bad; her partner learns to trust her to go do her own thing and return safely.

Well, if one depends on the other for security, and the other in turn depends on the one for something else, you have a healthy give-and-take relationship.

Apologies for not being clear with the question, first off.

Secondly, you actually did help me. What you said reminded me that both characters in the relationship get something in return, so it's not an unhealthy one-sided relationship.

However, the difference between Twilight and writing a believable relationship is trying to avoid the abusive/submissive, I-need-security-so-I'm-going-to-cling-the-crap-out-of-you kind of situation and having at least one person in the relationship serve as a guide and friend, not as a dom.

Fortunately, both relationships have people involved that don't get clingy to one another. The friendship where actually both characters have issues (one character is the one who is lied to by family, her partner doesn't allow himself to get close to any humans in the fear that they will be taken from him, and he blames himself for the loss of his previous partner), both characters also realize that the other person is their own person. So they begin to understand one another, though where I am right now in the story, they've just barely started traveling together.

Likewise, it's usually not a good idea to have the submissive person be overly clingy to the only person she trusts because, really, that makes it look like she's some crazy stalker. Unless she actually is, at which point... um, yeah. (Hello, Anthy.) In any case, remember that the kids won't die if you separate them. Unless they're stupid. Or, um, lost in a city. (Maybe she finds a map? After all, it sounds like she'd also be a bit more independent.)

I will admit that the character does come off in a stalkerish manner, since she starts to chase after her partner in an attempt to make sure that he's all right. But she actually gets distracted by helping another character take care of some Pokemon, so she isn't bothered by her partner being by himself. And when the two meet up again, they find that there was no reason to panic. (Her partner actually comes off more like Edward, in that he gets angry when she doesn't allow him to protect her, but that either gets edited out, or changed through character development.)

And if nothing makes sense in my post, then I'll just say that I'm trying to give as much information I can that I have (knowing my characters well before writing is something I never do) without giving out spoilers, and the fact that its six in the morning, boiling hot in the room I'm in, and I just got done thinking up a Sims 2 challenge.

But this all has helped me, so I'm able to get back to writing my Pokemon fanfic.

 

[An-chan]

So my question is: How does one write a relationship where one half of the couple sees the other half as a "security" without making the relationship sound like an unhealthy one?

/For the sake of clarity and my sanity, the half of the couple who needs security is called Mary in this post. The other one is Paul./

Depending on the level of security Mary, you may not be able to make the relationship sound like a healthy one anyway. It's never really that healthy to cling on to someone very tightly. It doesn't even matter all that much if Paul takes advantage of her or not, because as long as Mary needs him to feel secure and good, it's not going to be a healthy relationship. Of course, it's even more unhealthy if Paul indeed does take advantage of her trust issues. If Mary's neediness is of a lesser level, then you might just be able to pull it off as a healthy relationship... It depends on so many things. Xanthine kind o covered this already, and I pretty much have nothing to add to her post.

Then again, I think it would be really interesting to start off with a highly unhealthy relationship between Mary and Paul, and then work it towards the end. It would really give room for character development and emotional growth for both of them. It would also give all kinds of neat problems to ponder along the course of the plot. Of course, that might not be what you want to do at all, but this sure stirred my imagination!

On another note, I'm also writing a story with a relationship remotely resembling what you have. In my case, though, the other counterpart killed the other's father unwillingly and by accident, for which he feels guilty and sees himself as unfit to bring up the kid. The kid, of course, is a lot younger than him, so she practically sees him as her father, albeit having a slight crush on him when she's older. The problems of their relationship are caused by the fact the man tried to find a stable home for the kid when she was still young, which made her think she was unwanted.

Also, in the end of the, she's so not going to fall in love with the man. For crying out loud, he's been the closest thing to father for her for over ten years! I hate those kind of stories that would make them fall in love. Not every goddamn story has to have a random kiss in the end. Although, this one might have.

On an unrelated warning note: I won't be around at all next week. Work has increased my hours to almost full-time, and I'm going to be rather ragey all next week.

..Shhhht! You're not supposed to say things like that in public... Who knows what kind of criminals we get here if you tell them you're going to be gone for a while? :<

 

[dumbpikAchu]

Well, I decided that before I make the youtube version, I am going to put it here. find it maybe in 5 minutes, I dunno.

 

[rocky505]

I am currently writing the 31st chapter of my fic which will be a two parter and I'd like for some of you guys to come by Fanfiction.net to check it out. The fic is called Sinnoh Legends.

 

[An-chan]

Okay now. Firstly, I have no idea what that youtube thing was about, so I don't know where that post belongs. Maybe I've missed some earlier post and that's why I don't get it. I don't know. Secondly, fanfiction announcements go to the Fanfiction Announcement Thread. If you need help, brainstorming or advice, you should do it here, but if you only want to announce your fic, you should do it there.

Also, I am highly amused by this april fools' joke. It does make some things relatively hard, but still very amusing.

 

[JX Valentine]

I am currently writing the 31st chapter of my fic which will be a two parter and I'd like for some of you guys to come by Fanfiction.net to check it out. The fic is called Sinnoh Legends.

Aside from the fact that you're assuming we're not going to ignore this message because you're basically asking us to go to a completely different website instead of using the fanfiction archive already here to copy and paste your story in a place where we can easily quote examples from your story, you probably advertised this on the wrong day. I mean, we can't really tell who you are, and attempting to go to your profile brings us to the actual user Todoroki (or, at least, the original user). Same thing if we try to search for your posts: it just comes up as Todoroki's. On top of that, this is what I get when I try to search your story.

TL;DR, can't find your story, gave up, please to be posting on PC instead?

If you're worried that thirty-one chapters is a ***** to copy and paste (which is understandable because in a sense, it is), it gives you time to revise if needed, and copy-pasting doesn't really take that long, either. It'll also break up your story (assuming you don't post it all in one go), so you'll actually get responses because we're not flailing over thirty-one chapters to read. (Some people do. Some flail because they'll be reading over fifteen pages in one go. You'll have things like that. Partly, it's because not too many people have time to sit down and read thirty-one chapters in one go, and not too many people remember to come back after that. Partly, it's because a lot of people are lazy.)

Also, I am highly amused by this april fools' joke. It does make some things relatively hard, but still very amusing.

Not gonna lie. I preferred last year's "lol imma mod!" bit. At least then, you had spamming in Celebrations. And an edit button. And mentions of nude pictures of Serebii in the announcement thread.

Oh baby. Nude webmaster.

 

[txteclipse]

lol hai guyz!!1! non of u no who I am so I cn post liek this and get away wit it!!11!

 

[JX Valentine]

lol hai guyz!!1! non of u no who I am so I cn post liek this and get away wit it!!11!

*waves* Hi, Astinus, dear.

 

[txteclipse]

lol hai guyz!!1! non of u no who I am so I cn post liek this and get away wit it!!11!

*waves* Hi, Astinus, dear.

And that's when I seriously considered playing along with the other member's misconception. Oh, the power I could hold!

 

[JX Valentine]

And that's when I seriously considered playing along with the Todoroki member's misconception. Oh, the power I could hold!

Sorry. I only obey half-crazed sci-fi fangirls who abuse Sims and know at least thirty creative things to do with whipped cream.

Do you know at least thirty creative things to do with whipped cream? Because if so, this is the perfect time to screw like bunnies on the FFL.