View Full Version : Ash & Dawn (Rated PG-13)

Sweet Candace
February 8th, 2008, 5:44 PM
WARNING: This is prediction of life if Ash and Dawn marry. Basically, it's a sitcom. Rated PG-13 to be safe

Chapter 1

It was an average morning in Kanto. Several Pidgey were chirping in the trees. It was several years since Dawn and Ash married. Dawn became the professor in Kanto. They had three kids, Mary, Brandon and May. Ash became the Gym Leader in Viridian City. Sometimes, Dawn and Ash do tag Gym Battles

Pallet Town had grown into a nice little city, and is still the site of Prof. Oak's Lab

Everyone sat at the table when Ash made an announcement
"Kids, we're all going on vacation !" Ash said
"Wow ! Where ?" the kids replied
"To Mt. Coronet !" Ash replied
"Uh, Ash. Mt. Coronet doesn't have any snow" Dawn stated
"Okay, we're going to Mt. Snow !" Ash replied. They piled all their snow equipment into the minivan and drove off to Mt. Snow (the place doesn't exist, so don't ask)

Dawn parked the van in the parking lot and they walked into the lodge
"Hello, how long will you be staying ?" the attendant said
"Just a day, nothing more, nothing less" Ash replied
"Okay, then just sign here" the attendant replied. Ash signed them in and they were given a key to their room
"Oh, it's beautiful !" Dawn said
"It's got a beautiful view of the mountain, too !" Ash replied. They got into their snow equipment and skied to the chairlifts
"Uh, on second thought, I might as well stay back in the lodge" Dawn replied
"But, Dawn. This is a day for the family !" Ash moaned
"And I'd like to go with you, but I told you, I'm scared of heights !" Dawn replied. Dawn skied back to the lodge

After skiing for a while, Ash and the kids walked into the lodge. Dawn was sitting in a chair, sipping hot cocoa when Ash walked up
"Hi, honey, feeling any better ?" Ash replied
"Yes, in fact, I might as well ski for a little bit. Come on !" Dawn said, energetically. The chairlift let off Ash and Dawn on a steep incline. Dawn looked down nervously as Ash was trying to talk to her
"Now, if you need to fall, just fall down. Okay ?" Ash said
"Okay" Dawn replied and they skied down the mountainside. Halfway through, Dawn's ski tripped over something and she tumbled down the mountainside before stopping some 10 flips later
"Dawn, honey ! Are you all right ?" Ash shouted
"No, I think I felt something break !" Dawn shouted. An ambulance zoomed Dawn to the hospital, with Ash and the kids in toe

"I'm afraid Dawn broke both her leg and her arm. She'll have to be in a wheelchair for several weeks" the doctor said
"Oh, that's super !" Dawn shouted
"Dawn, I know you aren't happy, but if you need any help, I'll be there" Ash said, lifting Dawn into bed and piling up pillows to support her knee and her arm, "If you need me, just ring this bell and I'll run up here"
"Okay" Dawn replied

Several weeks later...
"I have good news, we can take off your casts, Mrs. Ketchum" the doctor said
"Oh, that's good to hear !" Dawn replied
"You're first few movements with your leg and arm will be stiff, but the stiffness will go away" the doctor explained. Dawn slowly wobbled to the van and drove home

END Chapter 1

Please read and rate !

February 16th, 2008, 6:59 PM
This is good. Keep it up!

February 16th, 2008, 8:49 PM
Please change the font of your chapter. I use a white-background skin, and it took me several tries to find a dark-background skin. Just use the forum default to make it easier for people to read so that they don't have to change skins to read your fic. Or highlight the text.

And I'll review tomorrow since I have the time.

February 18th, 2008, 7:12 PM
You just copied someone elses story! It is at www.fanfiction.net/s/4067004/1/Ash_&_Dawn_Rated_T See! that is not nice, and I think it is plagiarism, or something.

February 20th, 2008, 5:20 PM
Dawn Ketchum, sounds... not right

Lunar Glaceon
February 23rd, 2008, 11:59 AM
Dawn Ketchum, sounds... not right

It sounds... odd. Kinda very odd.