Aaron's Poke'mon Adventure

Part 1 Chapter 1: The New Beginning.

A young boy named Aaron was 10 years old and he lived in Pallet Town. One day he woke up from the sun and took a shower. After the shower he got dressed and went downstairs. Downstairs, he ate breakfast and opened the door to walk towards Professor Oak's lab.

"Hello there." said Professor Oak.
"Why hello there to you." said Aaron.
"Your just in time for your first poke'mon." said Professor Oak.
"Really, what is it?" asked Aaron.
"Why it's a Bulbasaur." said Professor Oak.
"Why thanks Professor Oak." said Aaron. "I want to see it inside."

Aaron and Professor Oak went inside the lab to see Aaron's Bulbasaur. Bulbasaur was just waiting there on a brown table eating his breakfast.

"Hello there Bulbasaur." said Aaron.
"Bulbasaur, this is your trainer Aaron, he's going to take care of you for now on." said Prof. Oak.

Bulbasaur looked at Aaron and smiled.

"Bulbasaur likes me." said Aaron.
"Sure he does." said Professor Oak.
"I'm going to name him Bulba." said Aaron.
"Alright then, but if you want to name him that, he'll stick to the name as well." said Professor Oak.
"That's okay then I'll just call him that then."

Professor Oak went towards the other table next too the one where Bulba was on and he grabbed a red flat thing.

"What's that?" asked Aaron.
"Well this is a poke'dex." said Professor Oak.
"What does it do?" asked Aaron.
"It keeps record of all of your poke'mon catching and poke'mon events." said Professor Oak.
"Cool, can I go now?" asked Aaron.
"Sure you can but I got to give you your five poke'balls first." said Professor Oak. "Here you go."

Aaron grabbed Bulba from the table and brought him to the ground and then when Aaron was Bulba was walking out of the poke'mon lab, they seen a man that was the same age as him but wearing brown hair, a black t-shirt, and purple pants with black shoes.

While they were walking by each other, they both glared at each other. Aaron opened the door and when him and Bulba was outside he looked towards the trail and they started running.

When they were running along the trail, Aaron spotted a Pidgey up in a tree so he made Bulba use Vine Whip to bring it down. When Bulba used Vine Whip, the Pidgey flew away.

Aaron was bummed that Pidgey flew away so he kept on walking along the trail. When he was still walking, he saw the same Pidgey so he made Bulba use Vine Whip again to attack it.

Pidgey got knocked out by the vines so Aaron looked at Pidgey and threw a poke'ball at it. Aaron was excited to catch a Pidgey and then by time he was done, he followed the same trail again.

When he was entering Viridian City he saw a big gang of people walking inside the poke'center. Aaron decided to go inside the poke'center as well because he wanted to heal his caught Pidgey.

When Aaron and Bulba was inside, he saw the gang spreaded out. When he was walking towards the nurse, he saw a professor that was like professor Oak except for that he was bald, a man with blonde hair that wore an army uniform, a lady with black hair that wore a purple shirt and black pants, and another man that looked like a ninja.

Aaron was worried that he'll be caught so he ignored them and gave the nurse the hurt Pidgey. After the Pidgey got fully healed, Aaron grabbed the poke'ball and accidentally bumped into the man with the army uniform.

"Hey kid, watch were your going." said the man.
"I'm sorry, I was in a hurry." said Aaron.
"That's a cute Bulbasaur you got there." said the man.
"Yes it sure is." said Aaron.
"Want to battle me?" asked the man with a kindly voice.
"Sure I can spare a battle." said Aaron.

Aaron brought out the Pidgey that he caught before and the man brought out a Pikachu.

"Ha, you can't beat my Pikachu with that puny Pidgey." said the man.
"Yes your right, but it's worth a try." said Aaron. "Pidgey use tackle."
"Going to attack huh, okay Pikachu thundershock." said the man.

When Pidgey flew up high to land the tackle, the Pikachu's cheeks gave out an electric shock from its cheeks and the Pidgey flew back down without a battle.

"Ha, see told ya you can't beat Pikachu with a flying type poke'mon." said the man. "Is that it or are you going to battle with you cute Bulbasaur?"

Bulbasaur walked in front of Pikachu and looked at it.

"Bulba use vine whip now." said Aaron.
"Okay Pikachu thundershock." said the man.

Bulba whipped out the vines and whipped them at Pikachu and when Bulba was done, Pikachu's thundershock didn't really effect Bulba but it hurt it.

"Dang it." said the man.
"Had enough?" asked Aaron.
"Nope, not yet." said the man. "Pikachu thundershock."

When a big man with a black tuxedo came in, the man in the army uniform stopped his Pikachu from attacking.

"Who do we have here?" asked the man in the tuxedo.
"I don't know, who is it Surge?" asked the old man.
"It's a puny kid that bumped me." said Surge with an angry voice.
"Ha, a kid, what's your name and age kid?" asked the man in the tuxedo.
"My name is Aaron and I'm ten years old." said Aaron.
"I see, I saw that you met my colleage Lt. Surge." said the man in the tuxedo.
"Yes I did sir." said Aaron. "Can I leave?"
"Can you leave? sure you can but first you gotta meet the rest of my colleages." said the man in the tuxedo.
"Giovanni stop now." said the lady with the purple shirt and black pants.
"Stop what for?" asked Giovanni.
"Just let the boy go already." said the lady.
"Okay, if you said it." said Giovanni. "I guess you can go now, our meeting is over."

When Aaron and Bulba ran out of the poke'center, he ran as fast as he could to escape if they were on his trail. Aaron saw a bush so he jumped inside to hide.

"Where's that puny kid at?" asked Lt. Surge.
"Don't worry about the kid, later on we'll meet him because your the Virmillion City gym leader." said Giovanni.
"That's right, so I can crush him like a bug even further down towards the ground." said Lt. Surge.

Aaron saw them going on a helicopter so him an Bulba got out of the bush and started walking back towards the poke'center to heal his Pidgey again for the second time.

Part 1 Chapter 2: A Rumbling Showdown.

After Aaron went out of the poke'center and started to head towards Viridian City. When he was walking towards Viridian City he saw alot of poke'mon on the way. Later on, he was entering the Viridian City.

Inside the Viridian City, he saw a bunch of poke'mon and a cute little Pikachu. Aaron kneeled down to see the Pikachu face to face and when Aaron looked at it, Pikachu's cheeks started to electrify.

"Uh oh." said Aaron while getting up. The Pikachu stopped and smiled at Aaron and then Aaron smiled.

"Go Bulba." said Aaron. "Use vine whip."

Bulba's vines came out of Bulba and they hit Pikachu. When Pikachu got hit, Pikachu used thundershock. Bulba got hit but not much.

"Use vine whip again." said Aaron. Pikachu got hit hard this time and it fell. Aaron had the chance to catch it so he grabbed out a poke'ball and threw it at Pikachu.

"Yeah, I got it." said Aaron. When Aaron caught Pikachu, Aaron kept on wondering in the forest. Later on after Aaron got out of the Viridian Forest, he saw Pewter City up ahead so he went running towards the city.

Aaron entered the city and up ahead he saw a problem so he went to look what was going on.

"What's going on officer?" asked Aaron.
"Me, oh I wish I was an officer, I'm a security guard from the city museum." said a man that was wearing a suit.
"Oh, well what happend?" asked Aaron.
"Oh what happend? The thing that happend was that a gang of two guys and a lady broke in a house and stole the house owners poke'mon." said the man.
"Wow, that's harsh." said Aaron. "Anything that I can help with?"
"Yes, you can find who it was." said the man.

When Aaron was searching around to see who they were, Aaron stopped for a minute to think. Two man and a women stealing poke'mon.

"Hey I think who they are." said Aaron to the security guards.
"Yeah who were they?" asked the security guard.
"I think it was a man who wore an army uniform, a guy that looked like a ninja, and a women that wore dark clothes." said Aaron.
"Oh, well that's easy then, come with me." said the security guard.

The security guard and Aaron went to talk to the real policemen.

"Hey I think this kid knows who the burglers are." said the security guard to a police man.
"You know who they are?" asked the police man.
"Yes I do, it was two guys and a lady, the lady wore dark clothes, one guy wore a military uniform, and the other guy wore a ninja suit." said Aaron.
"Yes, we got them." said the police man. "Who are you?"
"My name is Aaron and I live in Pallet Town." said Aaron.
"That's a long way from here." said the security guard. "What's your name again?"
"My name is Aaron." said Aaron.
"Aaron huh, hold on, I got to go change." said the security guard.

The security guard walked back towards the museum and while he was walking back towards the poke'center, the police man walked to talk to Aaron.

"The crooks were the Team Rocket, we tried to find them for awhile now." said the officer.
"Really?" asked Aaron.
"Yeah, we need to catch them quick before they do it again." said the officer.
"What's your name?" asked Aaron.
"My name is officer Jenny." said officer Jenny. "Look the security guard is coming back."

Aaron looked around and the officer was right the security guard was coming back.

"Hey, are you joining the poke'mon league?" asked the security guard.
"Yeah I am, why?" asked Aaron.
"Oh, because if you're looking for a battle come to the gym and we'll have a battle." said the security guard.
"Okay cool, I'll come with you." said Aaron. "What's your name?"
"My name is Brock, the gym leader of Pewter City." said Brock. "Here we are, the gym."

Brock and Aaron walked inside the Pewter City gym and they started the battle.

"Alright, this will be a one on one poke'mon battle, you can have two poke'mon okay?" asked Brock.
"Yes I got it." said Aaron.
"So let's go." said Brock. "I choose you Geodude."

Geodude came out and Aaron brought out Bulba.

"Bulba use vine whip." said Aaron.
"Use tackle." said Brock.

Geodude curled up his arms, put it under its body and rolled towards Bulba. Bulba's vines spurted out of its sides and Bulba whipped them around Geodude while Geodude was rolling towards him. Geodude stopped when Bulba's vines hit Geodude, Geodude stopped and crashed.

"Geodude get up and use tackle again." said Brock.
"Okay Bulba, when Geodude comes towards you jump and try to sling him around with vine whip." said Aaron.

Bulba looked at Geodude and when Geodude rolled towards Bulba, Bulba jumped and used vine whip. the vines wrapped around Geodude and then when Geodude was on top of Bulba, Bulba released it and Geodude came crashing down on a wall.

"Alright, return Geodude." said Brock. "Go Onix."

When Onix came out, Brock made Onix use tackle. Onix slung its head and it crashed down on the floor. By the time Onix's head came down, Bulba jumped on Onix and Aaron used vine whip.

"Go Bulba, use vine whip again on Onix." said Aaron.
"No you don't." said Brock. "Use bind."

Onix got up and started moving his tail to start binding on Bulba.

"Bulba, jump off Onix and use vine whip again." said Aaron.

Onix's tail collided with its body and Bulba used vine whip while jumping away from Onix. The vines hit Onix and Onix crashed down.

"Aaron, you have earned the Boulderbadge." said Brock.
"Cool, thanks." said Aaron.

Brock gave Aaron the Boulderbadge and when Aaron got it, he walked outside of the gym.

"Hey wait up, I want to come with you." said Brock.
"You are?" asked Aaron.
"Yeah because I want to find who those crooks are for myself." said Brock.
"Alright, let's get going then." said Aaron.

So Brock and Aaron exited the Pewter City and started walking towards Mt. Moon.

Hmm...
A little boring, but It's not that bad of a fic. It just needs a little work. I have a few suggestions for improvment.

1.) The fic could use a lot more detial. Speech is nice, but you need more detail to add to that. That is, more detail within the speech itself, as well as details for the area they're in and the characters. It's starts getitng boring when it's just a bunch of simple, plain speech with just a few details. So add some more and it'll become overall more interesting.

2.) The characters are a little one-dimensional, you need to give them more personality, maybe some back-story on Aaron. Work on personification. And add more emotion into the characters so they don't seem too flat.

3.) Please don't abuse the word "said". You just kinda threw it in after most of the dialogue, try to think of other words to make it seem less plain.

And as for some of the grammar errors...

The Beast said:

"Okay Pikachu thundershock." said the man.

Click to expand...

First of all, replace the period with a comma, or exclaimation mark if he was yelling, this tended to happen a lot in the story.
Also, be sure to put a comma after Pikachu, so it would be "Okay Pikachu, thundershock!" or something similar to that.

Ah, and I suggest spacing after eahc ine of dialogue, so it doesn't look too smashed up and confusing.

So just work on some of that stuff, and I'm sure you'll get a lot better, and so will your story.
Keep on writing.

...Man, I suck at closing reviews -.-;

Part 1 Chapter 3: The Two Ancient Fossils.

While Aaron and Brock was walking towards Mt. Moon, he saw a bunch of poke'mon so they rested and trained their poke'mon. While in Aaron's training Bulba evolved into Ivysaur and then Aaron decided to call Ivysuar Ivy.

During in Brock's training his Geodude grew to level 15 and learned rock throw and magnitude.

"Yes, now my Geodude is stronger." said Brock.
"Yes it is, and my Ivy is stronger." said Aaron.

After their training, they started to walk again. Later, on they saw a poke'center so they went inside and started to heal their poke'mon. After they healed their poke'mon they saw the mountain so they went inside to pass through it.

Inside the mountain, Brock and Aaron was training their poke'mon while walking to see a way out of the mountain. Later on, Aaron saw Team Rocket nearby so he told Brock to watch out.

"I'm not scared of the Team Rocket." said Brock. "Let's go and fight."

So Aaron and Brock went to fight the guard that was blocking two strange fossils so they walked over towards him and grabbed out their poke'balls.

"Hey, what are kids going in here?" asked the Team Rocket grunt.
"Us, where going to take those two fossils you got there." said Aaron.
"Well first you got to take me out first." said the grunt.

The T.R. grunt took out Ekans and Zubat and then Aaron and Brock took out Ivy and Geodude.

"Geodude use Magnitude." said Brock.
"Okay Ivy jump towards Ekans and use razor leaf." said Aaron.
"Alright Ekans and Zubat use bite on Ivysuar." said the T.R. grunt.

Ivy jumped and used razor leaf on Ekans and Zubat. Geodude used magnitude on then also. Ekans and Zubat got hit by razor leaf but Ekans got hit by magnitude but Zubat didn't.

"Okay Ivy, use vine whip on Zubat." said Aaron.
"Okay since he's using vine whip on Zubat, use rock throw on Ekans." said Brock.
"Use bite again Zubat and Ekans." said the T.R. grunt.

Ivy used vine whip on Zubat and then Zubat went soaring down. Geodude grabbed a rock and threw it at Ekans and the Ekans flew and crashed against a wall.

"That's easy." said Aaron.
"Yes it was." said Brock. "Now can we get the fossils?"
"Sure you can, but make sure that you pick the right one that you guys want." said the grunt.
"Alright, let's pick then." said Aaron.

Aaron picked up the right one and Brock picked up the left one. After they picked up the fossils, they turned around and all they seen was smoke.

"Alright since he got away, now we need to get out." said Aaron.

Later on, Aaron and Brock walked out of the mountain and arrived outside.

Part 1 Chapter 4: The Water Showdown.

When they were in Cerulean City, they first went to the poke'center to heal their poke'mon. After they were done healing, he looked at the map inside and saw that they had to head to the Cerulean City gym and defeat the leader.

"Hey, I gotta defeat the gym leader." said Aaron.
"The water trainer, Misty." said Brock.
"She uses water poke'mon?" asked Aaron.
"Yes she does." said Brock. "So if your challenging to go to Indigo Plateau, we got to go."
"Alright let's go then and defeat Misty." said Aaron.

When Aaron and Brock came out of the poke'center, Aaron looked around and then he saw the gym nearby so they went inside.

"You Misty?" asked Aaron to a girl that was wearing a swim suit.
"Yes I am, you're here for a battle?" asked Misty. "If you are, let's begin."
"Alright, go Ivy." said Aaron.
"Alright then, go Staryu." said Misty.

Misty sent out Staryu and Aaron sent out Ivy.

"Use razor leaf Ivy." said Aaron.
"Use swift Staryu." said Misty.

Ivy used razor leaf and then when the leaves hit, Staryu got hit hard.

"Alright Staryu, try swift again." said Misty.
"Okay Ivy, use vine whip now." said Aaron.

When the vines came out, Ivy jumped and whipped them at Staryu.

"Okay Staryu, try again." said Misty.
"Okay now, use razor leaf." said Aaron.

When the leaves came, Staryu dodged them and it went into the water.

"Alright that's enough Staryu." said Misty. "Come out now."
"Okay try again but be more presice." said Aaron.

When Ivy used razor leaf again, it was a super hit and Staryu came flying towards Misty.

"Alright Staryu, come on out Starmie." said Misty.
"Alright when Starmie comes out, use vine whip." said Aaron.

Starmie came out and then Ivy used vine whip. Starmie got hit by the vines hard.

"Okay Starmie, use bubblebeam." said Misty.
"Use razor leaf to fly through the bubbles." said Aaron.

When the bubbles came out of Starmie's top, Ivy immediately used razor leaf. The razor leaf went through the bubbles and it hit Starmie hard.

"Starmie, nice try." said Misty. "We did a nice try but we lost."
"Yes, I got a badge." said Aaron.
"Well about that." said Misty.
"What?" asked Brock.
"A mysterious man came here and stole my badges." said Misty. "I'll give them to you but there gone."
"Was the man wearing a military suit?" asked Aaron.
"Yes he did, why?" asked Misty.
"It's Team Rocket then, mostly it was Lt. Surge." said Brock.
"So Lt. Surge stole my badges then, let's go and find him then." said Misty.

So Aaron, Brock, and Misty went out of the gym and then suddenly they saw one of Misty's badges.

"Hey it's one of my badges." said Misty.
"Great, then now I got two badges now." said Aaron.
"Yes, but we still got to find the rest of them." said Brock.

So Brock, Aaron, and Misty went on for a search to find the rest of Misty's badges.

Part 1 Chapter 5: The Search For The Badges.

"How long is it going to take?" asked Misty.
"I don't know." said Aaron. "Maybe you should go look for yourself and it could be easier." said Aaron.
"Don't worry Aaron, let's just keep searching." said Brock.

So Brock, Aaron, and Misty kept on searching around Cerulean City and then suddenly, a mysterious man showed up.

"You looking for the cascade badges?" asked the mysterious man.
"Yes we are." said Misty. "Do you know where they are?"
"Yes I do, they're inside a ship and their taking them to another region." said the mysterious man.
"Who are they?" asked Misty.
"I don't know." said the mysterious man.

The man dropped a smoke bomb and then when it hit the ground, the man disappeared.

"Alright anyways, the next ship that's around here is in Virmillion City." said Brock.
"Alright let's go to Virmillion City then." said Aaron.

So Aaron, Brock, and Misty found the way to get out but it was down hill so they both went into a bike shop and they bought bikes to ride down the hill.

"Alright then, let's ride down the hill." said Aaron.

Aaron, Brock, and Misty both sped up down the hill and then when they got down the hill, Brock fell off his bike.

"Alright then let's ride up ahead." said Misty.

When they rode up ahead, they were in Virmillion City.

"There's the boat, so let's go." said Misty.
"Alright so let's go and board." said Brock.

Later on, they entered the ship and then they seen the badges boarding the ship.

"Hey what are you doing with my badges?" asked Misty.
"Where taking them to a secret area." said a man wearing a black uniform.
"Yes we are." said Lt. Surge while walking towards them.
"It's you." said Aaron.
"Yes it is, the captain of the S.S. Anne and gym leader of Virmillion City." said Lt. Surge.
"Come on take them back." said Misty.

Misty ran towards the badges and grabbed a big handful of the badges.

"Alright, you moved so come on out Raichu." said Lt. Surge.

Raichu came out and it used thunderbolt on Misty.

"That hurts." said Misty.
"It should be." said Lt. Surge.
"Come on now, if your hurting Misty, you should hurt my Bulba." said Aaron.
"No, wait until later, come on out Geodude." said Brock.

Geodude came out and it used roll out on Raichu. Raichu jumped but then Geodude came rolling back and hit Raichu.

"Come on Raichu, use quick attack." said Lt. Surge.
"Keep on rolling Geodude." said Brock.

Raichu ran as fast as it could and then Geodude came up towards it with a huge blow to the body.

"No my Raichu." said Lt. Surge. "You won back your badges but no my badge."

Lt. Surge grabbed a smoke bomb and then when it dropped, Lt. Surge and everything that came with Team Rocket vanished.

"Alright now, since you got your badges, what should we do now?" asked Aaron.
"Well you should go back to Virmillion City and defeat Lt. Surge once and for all." said Brock.
"Alright let's go for it." said Aaron.

So Aaron, Misty, and Brock came out of the S.S. Anne and went walking towards the Virmillion City gym.

wow
you like to type alot

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