View Full Version : venting poem/song thread

February 5th, 2005, 2:22 PM
here's a thread where if you're angry about something, you can get it off your chest, but you can't mention names, and you can't curse. express your anger, but keep it clean. although it may be like swallowing nails, this is a reasonable thread, because it's better to vent than to bottle anger up.

here's somethin i just wrote in my rhymebook:

Its like no matter what I did,
I always ended up losin'
The things you said to me
Left my heart with bruises
And I have never recovered
Or begun to heal the wounds
You left me more barren and empty
Than those arid desert dunes.
Every time Im hurt
I end up apologizing to you.

Lets take a step back through time,
Lets rewind.
Ill reveal to you a little
Of whats runnin through my mind.
In fact lets go back
To just late last week
So I can show you exactly
Just how you played me.

You said I was your one true love
Lets pause there.
offense #1:
You made me think you cared.
You said youd wait right there
If I ever came back.
And I did, but it couldnt be
Because you already lost track
Of your feelings for me,
So I take a look at a thread or two,
You tell me what did I see?
You saying you had feelings for someone for weeks.

Wait a second,
The timelines dont check out.
You telling me you loved me,
What was all that about?
And you wonder why I wont talk
And tell you whats wrong.
From your analysis of my poem,
You knew pretty well, all along.

You left me broken,
Shattered, discarded, and forgotten.
And youre mad at me for the attitude Im coppin?
Well according to my conscience,
I have a right to be mad.
But even after reading all of this,
You still wont feel bad,
Will ya?

February 5th, 2005, 2:23 PM
I liked it very much.Good work.

February 5th, 2005, 2:54 PM
thanx a lot.it's not pretty, i know, but life isn't.

February 5th, 2005, 3:42 PM
Wow nicely done. And don't worry about it not being pretty. You couldn't be anymore right, life is not pretty at all.

February 5th, 2005, 3:45 PM
Oooh, shweet poem Mattie. ^^ Since you're venting anger, I am kinda afraid to review that one. XD But, I do think it has a good flow to it, even if it's expressing anger, 'tis still a beautiful poem. ^^


February 5th, 2005, 4:10 PM
thanx for reaing, that's more than enough kelsey...thank you

February 5th, 2005, 4:16 PM
I loved the flow of it, and how you expressed your anger through such a beautiful poem. I really loved your last verse though, it kinda relates to the last verse in your first paragraph. =D

February 5th, 2005, 4:33 PM
Sowwy, Matt, but I think I have to close this. This actually is kinda a form of SPAM. If people wish to vent their anger, then they can just create their own thread. It's just easier that way, sorry pal.