Nobody likes my cooking,
I just don't understand why.
Why people won't eat my black widow pie.
People run when they see me bake,
they won't even try my moth-filled cake.
I gather up the extras in great big bowls,
but they still refuse to eat my insect rolls.
I put all the goodies in my Frigidaire fridge,
but they throw all my creations off the Golden Gate Bridge.

There once was a pirate feared,
His ghastly name was Blackbeard.
He struck fear upon the sea,
a mighty pirate was he.
His ghastly name was Blackbeard.

I can't fall asleep tonight,
not with all my might.
I've counted all the sheep,
I've buried in my covers deep,
I've tried for hours, I might as well cry.
What's that mom, close my eyes?
Oh well, it's worth a try.

One day I decided to fly,
I gave jumping off the roof a try.
I soared across the sky,
watching the world pass me by.
But then I landed on my head,
now I'm in the hospital, on a bed.