Ash's Tears [PG-13]

[Enperuto]

xD You think about the stupid, Child-like Ash and then this comes and you're like, What the--? It's OK, but I never was much on an alcohol fan. 'Twas pretty good. :)

Thanks.

Well.... A little grim..... definitely not something my borthers should see.... But i'm impressed. I always liked these type of stories.... the kind that keep my brothers up all night...... 9/10 from this Boy.

Thanks, though I would be interested in knowing what makes it 9 instead of 10...

Does anyone realize how how this will end the entire pokemon mecha?As Shoots himself!I ca never see him doing that,well,any ways,how does mistys death involve an alakazam?(and ash is right,drunk gary probably stole his daddy oakys alakazam)

Does anyone realize that this is fan fiction? And why would Gary need to steal his grandfather's Alakazam when he already has one? Alakazam could kill in numerous ways, especially if you go with the theory that Pokemon dampen their attacks when they fight others so as not to kill (Dragonfree/Butterfree pioneered that one, I think), otherwise, just a psychic tecnique that crushed their brain, stopped their heart, etc. It would be quite easy, really.

1.I thought Professor Oak was Gary`s granddaddy.

2. That`s a respectable theory. Ash returns home, Misty dies is murdered, Ash shoots Gary, then he shoots himself.
.
.
(Note to self: If an episode like that were to air, watch it. (SHOT))

3.I`m still wondering why almost all of Pallet Town is drunk. xD Was there some kind of celebration?

Think about: small, well-knit communtiy, and then someone dies. It'd sort of be a tragedy, not to say that alchohol is the solution to tragedy. And my theory would have placed Ash home for a couple of years already, but yeah, pretty much.

T_T Wow.
I loved it! XD
I'm all for Morbid-like fanfictions,(Guilty of writing a few. ~_^ ) Well Okay, Lots XD ) and its a nice change from the happy-like theme Pokemon has goin' on. If you have any other writing works, fanfiction or not, I'd love to read them.

(I have a different one-shot called Jump where a trainer is trying to comit suicide on Victory Road in Hoenn, but that ends with his Ariados rescuing him.) (Also have a chaptered fic, but it's not good at all and you wouldn't want to read it anywas, it's way happier.)

Thanks for reading this, Momoiro!

 

[Scarlet Weather]

OMG YOU SHOT ASH!!!!

Well, aside from the main problem with morbid anime-based fics (i.e. everyone is way OOC) this is... pretty good, I suppose. Why it had to be Ash, of all people, I'll never know. Personally, I think that morbid fics should stick to being OC, since using the anime kind of makes the reader go "this doesn't sound like the current Ash at all" where they should be going "How sad, this poor guy had his soon-to-be-wife shot!" In addition, you took a shipping and incorporated it in, which is never good unless it's altoshipping.

I'll go read that "Jump" fic, and I think I've skimmed over "Now and Forever" a few times. I'll give it another go over.

 

[steel_pscyho612]

woah. thats all i can say. it was just great, couldn't find a single mistake or flaw. i love murder stories. it was great

 

[Lady Berlitz]

This is an awesome fanfic!!! Even though I don't think that is the right word for these kinds of fan fics.

Just one question: Is there going to be a sequel? I mean, if Ash really dies, because it doesn't exatly say where you shot him, or if you get caught by the police?

 

[pokemon157]

9/10 good job , keep up the good work.

 

[Enperuto]

OMG YOU SHOT ASH!!!!

Well, aside from the main problem with morbid anime-based fics (i.e. everyone is way OOC) this is... pretty good, I suppose. Why it had to be Ash, of all people, I'll never know. Personally, I think that morbid fics should stick to being OC, since using the anime kind of makes the reader go "this doesn't sound like the current Ash at all" where they should be going "How sad, this poor guy had his soon-to-be-wife shot!" In addition, you took a shipping and incorporated it in, which is never good unless it's altoshipping.

I'll go read that "Jump" fic, and I think I've skimmed over "Now and Forever" a few times. I'll give it another go over.

The thing is, morbid fics can't happen with in-character characters, because, well, they wouldn't go around shooting people. But I guess I sort of just extended their lives maybe ten / fifteen years so they were all done journeying... And then Ash probably wouldn't have done it except he was trying to drink the pain away...

woah. thats all i can say. it was just great, couldn't find a single mistake or flaw. i love murder stories. it was great

Thanks.

This is an awesome fanfic!!! Even though I don't think that is the right word for these kinds of fan fics.

Just one question: Is there going to be a sequel? I mean, if Ash really dies, because it doesn't exatly say where you shot him, or if you get caught by the police?

Well, I'd thought the last line gave it away, but I guess now that I think about it sort of leaves it open... So kudos for noticing that. And a sequel? I dunno if there'd be room for one, I mean I killed Misty, Gary, and Ash, but I have a germ of an idea for a prequel, maybe... It might be how Ash fell to alchoholism and started dating Misty... maybe.

9/10 good job , keep up the good work.

Thanks.

 

[joyce : the fluffy pirate~]

Oh, I really find this a beautiful story..
So sad, and still I feel like.. I don't know how to explain xD.

[ omgd you killed Gary =O *insert loud fangirl scream inhere* ]

 

[Enperuto]

Oh, I really find this a beautiful story..
So sad, and still I feel like.. I don't know how to explain xD.

[ omgd you killed Gary =O *insert loud fangirl scream inhere* ]

Thanks for reading it, Joyce. (The funny thing is when I posted this on SPPf my avatar was Gary...)

(Holy cow, when is this thing going to be dead? Just kidding, happy people are still looking at it.)