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Diamond and Pearl: Never-ending cheat on how to obtain Celebi

Your mom who will eat it and die because it was posioned..
After the funeral u run away from all you know near & dear and wind up in
 
You End up in Mario's Castle in which he jumps on your head 100 times to get a mushroom out of you to feed is pet gorilla scyther(o.o) and when he is done eating he throws you out the window and you land in..
 
catching a ratata and riding it to canlava city than steel the books in the library go to porf brich and tell him to gave you a mudkib nickname mudkib into celebii than a elebii well apper but it well ran away you must fallow it too................
 
... South Dakota but you will not find it there so you must keep searching. Check out the computer in P.S. 1578, and check your email. There, you will find an email containing...
 
A Rattata-virus that came to eat you! If you have an anti-virus then the Rattata will dissapear and the email will say that you need to go to the Mining Museum and...
 
Steal all of the fossils on display.
You steal them and u are chased until u reach cinnabar island where u find a place to stay... u look at the fossils and 1 is a celebi but...
 
The Celebi takes off a mask and reveals another Celebi. While you are confused, the Celebi takes the fossils and...
 
Your mom. She actually survived. Or you thought so, until she transformed into a Ditto, and...
 
you need this ditto! bring it to rustborrow city to the devon building to the people that bring fossils back to life. they will bring the ditto back to life and it will turn into a very special golden with black and pink stripes and blue and green dots pokeball. you need this to catch a green lugia with 3 wings. but you need to weaken it with a special pokemon. go get your yellow deoxys with 8 arms from your computer, and watch out, because there is a undead burnt rattata waiting behind the computer, and he wants to eat you! just shoot at him with a big gun thingy. now take deoxys to your home, the green lugia with 3 wings willl be sleeping in your bed. just weakken it and throw the very special golden with black and pink stripes and blue and green dots pokeball at it. now you will have 2 of the 8 pokemon you need to catch celebi :D
 
...except they die after giving them to an evil nurce joy, who then gives you an evil togepi, and it randomly evolves in to a...
 
evil Togetic with a bazooka. Then you have to challenge Brawly to a Gym Battle to it, and your Togetic will blow up the gym with his bazooka, and Brawly will die. Then you steal the badge, and run away to...
 
saffron city. siliph co. has finaly begun creating mass masterballs, and they are for sale here in the pokemart. so go there and spend all your money on masterballs. you will be able to buy... 0,0000345 masterballs when you have max money, so have alot of rematches with everyone and collect money untill you can buy 10 masterballs. when you buy your tenth masterball a warp hole will open that sucks you in and you will end up in Hollow Bastion. here you find Riku who is possessed by Xehonarts heartless who tells everyone he is Ansem. he will attack you. to beat him you need: a yellow deoxys with 8 arms, which you don't have, a green lugia with 3 wings, which you don't have, a puple arceus with type ??? that knows only curse, which is having a nap around the corner so catch it with one of your masterballs(this is one of the 8 pokemon you need to catch celebi),and a keyblade, which you don't have. so Riku will kick your ass, punch your face, pull your hear, and thrust his knee... in a place where you don't want it. then he uses his special keyblade to unlock your heart and turn you into a heartless. now you must...
 
Pretend to be dead, because a raging Ursaring is about to attack you. It pulls your head off and eats it, but when it walks away, your head comes back, because you're the main character, stupid! Main characters don't die! Then you throw the Masterball at the Ursaring, which is the 2nd of the 8 Pokemon you need to catch Celebi.

Then you go to your mom's house, and she tells you that you actually need every Pokemon to catch Celebi, even Celebi. You then proceed to scream out "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" for 30 seconds and collapse on the floor, weeping your eyes out. Then..
 
Wooty McWoot said:
Pretend to be dead, because a raging Ursaring is about to attack you. It pulls your head off and eats it, but when it walks away, your head comes back, because you're the main character, stupid! Main characters don't die! Then you throw the Masterball at the Ursaring, which is the 2nd of the 8 Pokemon you need to catch Celebi.

Then you go to your mom's house, and she tells you that you actually need every Pokemon to catch Celebi, even Celebi. You then proceed to scream out "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" for 30 seconds and collapse on the floor, weeping your eyes out. Then..
Click to expand...

you find out that your mom was a ditto that transformed into your mom, telling you a lie, the ditto transforms into a caterpie and attacks you. then.
 
You step on the caterpie, killing it, then go to the Professor Oak's house, and ask him where the next pokemon is. Then he tells you the Ditto was actually your mom who transformed into a Ditto(lol) and you killed her. Then...
 
he realises that you are a heartless and that you look very scary and he attacks you with his house key. you must kill him to survive. then...
 
...Prof. Oak comes alive and will tell you to eat his desk. As you are doing so, Prof. Oak will eat you. You will then be sent into (via oak's im eating off your head and sending you somewhere powers) to Tracy Sketcitt's Prof. Oak love shrine. He will tell you to eat a blue-ish-grey...
 
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