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[Pokémon] Diamond Dust - An OT Fanfic

Unionhack

Yes Indeed
  • 40
    Posts
    13
    Years
    I'd imagine the OT bit scared you off by now, but if not, thanks!

    Rated PG, by the way, but it may go up later in the future.

    Here's chapter One.

    _________

    It was a bright day in Littleroot Town, a day like many others. But today was special for a group of young friends who lived in the town.

    Jet and his two friends, Dawn and Blaze, were waiting anxiously outside Jet's house. Jet was a medium sized ten-year old, with brown hair that was chin level in the back and sides, and covered his forehead in the front. He had blue eyes that were often the source of compliments. He was quite laid back when he wasn't being serious, but when he was riled up like he was while waiting, he was perky and hasty.

    Jet tapped his foot while leaning against the side of his house, Blaze right next to him, and Dawn lying down in the grass in front of them. They had all one thing in mind; when Jet's father was going to get home with their first Pokemon.

    Blaze began to whistle off-key out of boredom. He was a tad bit shorter than Jet, with wild blonde hair that stuck up in the back and on the sides. He was the most impatient of the three, and of many people he knew. Waiting was not his cup of tea, especially when it concerned Pokemon.

    Dawn sighed and stretched out on the grass, tying to doze off to lessen the wait. She was a short girl compared to her two friends, due in part that she was a year younger than Jet and Blaze, who were both ten. Dawn had long blue hair than went down past her shoulders, and had light blue eyes, eyes not as deep and calm as. She was more patient than Blaze and Jet, and always kept them happy when things were looking bad. She didn't mind the wait, because she liked quiet afternoons like the one she was experiencing, and it was all the better with her two best friends alongside her.

    Blaze was about to complain, when Jet looked this left towards the road going to Route 201. "There!" Jet exclaimed. "There's the truck! My dad's here!"

    Indeed, a truck was driving towards the town, driven by a short and black haired man with a smile on his face. Norman was a Pokemon trainer who loved everything about Pokemon, especially catching them. He had always promised his son and his friends a Pokemon, but it had taken him quite a while to find a gap in his work schedule to take the time and catch some. Norman was the gym leader of Petalburg city, a town not too far from Littleroot, often reputed to be one of the friendliest cities in Hoenn.

    Norman parked the truck outside the house and got out, with a box in his arms. "Alright, you three. These Pokemon come from a man I know well, a friend of mine named Bill from all the way in Kanto. They haven't any Pokeballs to themselves, so I hope you all brought the ones I gave you."

    Jet, Dawn, and Blaze each grabbed the Pokeballs that Norman had custom-made for them. Jet's was a dark blue with a white snowflake on the top, while Blaze's was red with an orange flame decal on the top. Dawn's was a green pokeball with a leaf icon on the top. Norman looked at the three kids and nodded, then put the box down and opened it.

    Inside were three Eevees, small fox-like Pokemon that were known for their unstable genetic codes. Two were brown, while the third was a shining silver.

    "They're all about six weeks old. The two brown ones are brother and sister, and the silver one had a brother, another silver Eevee, who escaped from Bill for some reason. Bill takes great care of his Pokemon, so I have no idea why one would run away from him. The little one's been taking it hard."

    Jet bent over and looked at the three. The two brown ones were standing up with their paws on the edges of the boxes. The one on the left, an excited little male, was scraping at the edges, while the one on the right, a calm female, eyed Jet eagerly. The silver male was curled up, eyeing Jet with a curious expression. Jet went to pick the silver Eevee up, who sniffed his hands and looked at the boy timidly. Jet carefully lifted him under the arms and held the Eevee up. "I'll take the silver one, dad. I'll make him feel better, don't worry." Jet said.

    The silver Eevee leapt back a little from Jet's feet when he was put down, but then walked back slowly. Jet set his poke ball on the ground in front of the little Pokemon, who sniffed it. The silver Eevee leant forward and tapped on the middle button of the ball, which opened with a light blue beam that engulfed the Eevee. The Eevee squeaked at first, but then disappeared into the beam, which went back into the ball. The ball shook three times, and then laid still.

    Jet clenched his fist in joy at his first catch. "Alright! No problems at all!" Norman patted his son on the back. "Nicely done. Take care of him." Jet nodded and looked at the poke ball. "I'll name him Union. It sounds neat." Norman looked at his son. "Ah, you're nicknaming it? Most trainers decide against nicknaming their Pokemon." Jet shook his head. "Dawn, and Blaze and I decided we're gonna nickname our Pokemon so we don't get them confused with others. It makes them stand out!" Norman nodded, smiling. "Alright. Take care of Union then."

    Blaze ran up to the box next. "Hey, you're pretty excited, huh little fella?" He said as he picked up the little brown male Eevee. It wriggled out of Blaze's grasp and leapt onto his face, licking furiously. Blaze fell to the ground, startled. "Whoa! Whoa! Chill out, buddy! Chill out!" He said, as he plucked the baby Eevee from his face. The Eevee ran leapt up and down at Blaze's feet as he readied his poke ball. He tossed the ball up, and it landed on the Eevee. A red beam, akin to the one that came from Jet's ball with a different color, engulfed the Eevee. The ball didn't shake once; the Eevee willingly allowed capture.

    Blaze leapt from his feet. "Yahoo!" he yelled as he picked up the ball, cherishing his first Pokemon. "I'll name you… Pyro. Yea, that's it! And I'll make sure to get a Fire stone to turn you into a Flareon when you're older!"



    Dawn chuckled at him, and then peeked into the box. "Hi, little girl!" She said to the last Eevee. The Eevee responded with a happy squeal. Dawn lifted her out of the box and then set the Eevee at her feet. "Aw, you're so cute! I'm glad you were the last one!" She said as she scratched the Eevee gently on the head. "You ready? You'll be mine from now on." Dawn said as she laid the green ball on the ground. The Eevee calmly walked to the ball and nudged the button with her nose. The ball opened and shot out a green beam that caught the Eevee like the two before it. Dawn bent over to grab the ball, smiling. "I'll call her Nei, I think." She said, staring at the pokeball.

    Norman smiled as the three children eyed their pokeballs. "Take care of them, you three. Now, go ahead and let them out. They've been boxed up for a while, they could use some exercise."

    The three kids complied and opened the pokeballs. Union, Pyro, and Nei materialized from the beams in front of their eyes. Dawn knelt in front of Nei and scratched her like before. Blaze tried to get Pyro to use moves, but Pyro just stood at his trainer's feet, confused at the commands.

    Jet knelt by his Eevee. "You wanna go play with them, Union?" The silver Eevee looked at his trainer, his ears drooped. Jet frowned. "Aw, don't be that way. You still miss your brother, huh?" Union walked a bit closer to Jet, listening intently. "Don't worry! One day, we'll find him. I mean, how hard can finding a silver Eevee be? We'll go to Kanto someday and look for him. I promise!" Union's ears bolted up, his eyes bright. "Eevee?" he squealed, a happy look on his face. Jet nodded and nodded, and Union sprung up to Jet's face and licked it. Jet laughed and pointed at Nei and Pyro, who were engaged in a battle by heed of their trainers. "They're busy, so you're stuck with me for now."

    Union leapt a little bit backwards, and crouched, indicating he wanted to play. Jet stood up and stepped forward, and Union sprang off at a high speed, running around Jet's house. Norman stared at the silver blur, amazed. "He's fast, Jet. Faster than any Eevee I've ever seen, that's for sure. I've seen Jolteons that Union could outrun. How'd you get him so excited?" Jet shrugged. "I just talked to him." Norman nodded. "Eevee is a smart species that understands human speech easily. You've picked a special Eevee, that's for sure. A different colored one with unnatural speed. You'd do well to train him to use that speed to your advantage." He said. Jet nodded, and then gave chase after Union.

    Norman stood and smiled. He looked forward to the day his son would be ready to face him, and he didn't doubt one bit that Union and Jet would be a near unstoppable combination.

    __________________


    Jet awoke from his nap suddenly, Dawn's voice calling his name. He opened his eyes and saw Dawn and her Leafeon, Nei, standing over him. "You and Union dozed off against your house, Jet. Come on, get up. Your mom wants you inside, it's late." Jet looked to his right, at the white and blue Glaceon at his side, a special Glaceon opposed to the normally turquoise-blue Glaceon. Union always seemed to be shiny, especially when in the moonlight like he was. Jet leant over and patted his Glaceon on the back. "Union, get up, we've gotta go inside." He said. Union groggily opened his eyelids. "Glai?" the Glaceon said, still sleepy. Jet stood up, and Union got up as well, stretching out on the grass.

    Dawn tapped Jet on the shoulder. "Jet, you do remember what day it is tomorrow, right?" Jet thought for a little while, and the answer dawned upon him. "It's your fourteenth birthday tomorrow, Dawn. I wouldn't forget!" Dawn frowned. "You forgot last year." She said sadly. "I know, I know. Don't worry; I'll make it up this time." Dawn smiled again. "Promise?" she said. Jet nodded. "Promise." Dawn smiled. "C'mon, Nei, let's go home." She said. Nei leapt onto Dawn's pink skirt and propelled herself up to Dawn's shoulder, and then to the top of Dawn's white beanie. "See you tomorrow, Jet!"

    Jet stared at Dawn's back as she walked away. He had remembered her birthday at that moment, but he had forgotten to get her a present from the market in Oldale. "I'm dead, Union. I forgot all about it." Union looked up at his trainer with a curious look. "Glai?" he said again. Jet shook his head. "I'll think of something. Come on, let's head inside.

    Jet's mom, Elizabeth, was reading to Dawn's Togepi, Tipi, on the couch, while Jet's sister, Lui, was playing with her Vulpix, named Vully. Elizabeth had been taking care of Tipi for Dawn, because Norman had insisted that Togepis needed special attention early in their lives, and if anyone could provide it, it was Jet's mom, who was a professional Pokemon breeder. Union immediately ran to the couch and stood up to Tipi. Tipi smiled and squealed "Togi!" as the white Glaceon curled around her. Union had taken up an older brother position among the younger Pokemon in the house in the past five years since Jet caught him, especially the baby Tipi, and Union played with Vully often, who wasn't much older than Tipi, having been born to Elizabeth's Ninetales two year earlier. Tipi, on the other hand, was discovered as an egg in route 202 by Dawn, who was taking a walk with Nei.

    "Sorry, mom, I dozed off." Elizabeth laughed. "I know. If it weren't for Dawn coming to check up on Tipi, I would have had to come and get you myself." Jet sighed. When his mom came to wake him up, she often used her Exploud, Screech, to wake Jet up. "I'll thank Dawn later, then." Jet said, chuckling. Jet's mom nodded. "Remember, it's her birthday tomorrow. Don't sleep in." Jet sighed again. "I won't, I won't. I don't wanna have to deal with Screech, after all. Come on, Union, let's get to bed." Union flicked Tipi gently with his tail, and followed Jet up the stairs to his room.

    After getting ready for bed, Jet stepped out of his bathroom to see his white Glaceon already asleep at the foot of his bed. Union never did like being inside his poke ball, even when asleep, but he went when he had too. Jet smiled, and then went to the chair beside his window. It was calm and cloudless outside, so Jet opened the window. Across from the window was the window to Dawn's room in her house, and across the road from Dawn's house was Blaze's house, part of it still blackened and charred from an accident when Blaze's Flareon, Pyro, tried to use ember during a battle with Union, who easily dodged.

    Jet looked at the window to Dawn's room, the curtain down and the window closed. He could see the silhouettes of Dawn and Nei laying in the bed, watching TV together. Jet frowned and clasped his hands over his face, leaning over. He looked up again towards the night sky, dotted with stars. He stared at the beauty of all the stars, sparkling in the sky, so lost in their glitter that he almost missed the sight of a shooting star flying across the sky. "Wow…" Jet said as he witnessed the nearly once-in-a-lifetime occurrence.

    Jet never really believed in wishing upon shooting stars; in fact, the very idea seemed childish to him, but something compelled him to do just that. "I wish I could find something great to give to Dawn tomorrow, something that'll make up for forgetting last year. Something unique."

    He stared at the sky for a little longer, and then got up out of his chair and looked at his bed. On it rested a small jewelry box with a red bow on top. "Huh?" Jet inquired. He opened the box, and in it was a necklace, a masterfully crafted necklace with a golden chain and a thin emerald in the shape of a leaf on the end, with the word 'Nei' engraved on the emerald.

    Jet stared in awe at the piece of jewelry. It was definitely unique, just like he had wished. Astonished, Jet ran back to the window and leant over, his head sticking outside. He saw nothing in the sky and nothing to his right, but when he looked to his left, there floated a small, white creature with a yellow, star shaped head, with blue tags hanging from three of the tips of its head. Jet gasped and backed away from the window and shook Union, who woke up. The small figure floated in front of the window and timidly landed on the windowsill, eyeing Jet. "Jira? Jira-chi?" the small Pokemon said.

    Jet stared at it as his brain rushed to find where and when he had heard that word. 'Jirachi…' thought Jet. He remembered suddenly. "Are you a Jirachi? The wish making Pokemon?" Jet asked, remembering what his dad and the local Pokemon Professor, Professor Birch, had said about the legendary Pokemon.. Jirachi floated up and did a small somersault in the air, pointing upwards while exclaiming "Jira-chiii!" Jet stood mouth agape, while Union stared at the small figure.

    Jet shook his head. "Well, if you made that present appear, thanks a lot. You really saved me there. Is there anything you need? Anything at all? I really wanna make it up to you." he said, while Jirachi listened intently. The small figure floated towards Jet and turned around, showing a cut on its' back. Jet made a sucking noise with his teeth as he looked at the wound. "You're hurt pretty bad, huh? Sure, I'll help you, it's the least I could do for you." Jirachi smiled as Jet walked to his desk and looked for a box of bandages. Union just sat on the bed, while Jirachi floated around him, inspecting the unusually white Glaceon. Jet came back with a few bandages. "Okay, Jirachi, stay still for me." He said. He sprayed a bit of a potion on Jirachi's back, which made Jirachi jump a little, but it floated back. Jet then wrapped an adhesive bandage around Jirachi, covering the cut. "There. All better, right?" Jirachi squealed in joy as it flew around the room.

    Jirachi landed and sat on Jet's head. "You know, you're welcome to stay here for a while, if you want, so whatever's chasing you will leave you alone. Me and Union here will make sure you're okay." Jirachi flew up off of Jet's head and landed on the bed, looking at Jet with wide eyes. "Alright, you can stay here. But there's one condition. I've got to show you to dad and Professor Birch. The professor really wants to know more about you, Jirachi." Jirachi made a sigh-like sound. "Please, Jirachi? They won't hurt you, I promise." Jirachi put a hand to its chin, and then nodded, smiling. "Alright then! Come on, let's go see dad first. Come on Union." Union hopped off the bed, rather angry that he had only seen a few minutes of sleep today.

    Norman was walking down the hall from up the stairs, carrying a few binders filled with papers concerning the Pokemon gym in Petalburg. He looked at Jet sleepily as his son walked out of the room, Union following him. "Yes, Jet? What is it?" Jet had his hands behind his back. "Dad, this might be a shock to you, so be prepared for a surprise." Norman put a free hand to his face, a little irritated and ready to go to bed. "Show me, Jet, so I can go to bed." Jet put his hands to his sides, and Jirachi floated from behind him. Norman's jaw opened from surprise, and the stack of binders he was holding hit the ground hard. "Oh my god." Norman said.

    Jet held Jirachi in his arms. "I told you so." He said, still a little shocked by his father's reaction. Norman stared at Jirachi for a little while, until he spoke to Jet. "Put some better clothes on. We're going see Professor Birch."

    _____________________

    Their car pulled up outside Professor Birch's lab a few minutes later. Union followed Norman and Jet, who still had Jirachi in his arms, into the lab.

    "Professor," Norman said as he walked inside. "Come see who Jet found." Professor Birch rubbed his eyes. "This late, Norman? I hope it's good." Norman laughed. "I think you'll like what you see." He said. Jet walked in, Jirachi in his arms, and Birch went through the same reaction as Norman. "This… this is impossible. We've searched for Jirachi for years, and all it takes to find him is a teenager to sit around? Jet… have you ever considered the Pokemon Professor career? You could make decent money if Jirachi simply showed up to you." Jet laughed a little. "Jirachi agreed to let you research him, but only if you keep it to a minimum. And don't do anything startling, please. He's really scared of people. He was scared of me at first until I patched up a cut on his back."

    Birch nodded. "It can talk?" he asked, but Jet shook his head. "He understands, though, and he can nod or shake his head to let you know. Be careful with him, please." Birch shook his head. "I think this situation is a bit beyond my level. Will Jirachi stay with you if you bring him home?" Birch asked. Jet nodded. "I said he could stay so he could get better so he could go back home." Birch nodded. "Let's hope he stays for a little while. I'm calling Professor Oak." Norman gasped. "Oak? I haven't seen Professor Oak in years. It'll be good to see him again. Is this really that big of an occurrence?" Norman asked. Professor Birch nodded. "This is a once in a lifetime chance, Norman. We can't let this opportunity pass us by without letting Oak look at Jirachi. Jet, you've done us a great thing by showing Jirachi to us." Jet nodded. "Hear that, Jirachi? They're not gonna hurt you." He said to Jirachi, who floated around Professor Birch's head. "Amazing…" Birch remarked.

    ______________________

    Jet woke up the next morning, relieved to see Jirachi still sleeping, cuddled up with a curled up Union. He crawled out of bed and put his favorite black shirt on, a long sleeved black shirt with a blue line going down the middle where it could be unbuttoned. Jet put some jeans on as well, and unbuttoned the shirt at the bottom so that it spread out a little at the bottom, showing a bit of his white undershirt. Union awoke slowly like he always did, and Jirachi floated up to Jet's head. "Jirachi, I know you don't like people very much, and Union and I are going to a party today, so we'll leave you here with my dad, my mom, my sister, and a few Pokemon for you to play with, okay?" Jirachi floated around Jet's head while upside down, saying it's name a few times. "Heh, I'll take that as a yes." Jet remarked. "

    Jet left Jirachi with his family and walked over to Dawn's house, present in hand, and Union at his right side. He knocked on the door, and Dawn opened it. "Hey, Jet!" she said as she hugged him. "Hey, Dawn. Happy birthday!" Jet said back as Dawn stepped back. "Blaze and Pyro are already here. Oh, and that reminds me, Hi Union!" Dawn said as she patted the shining Glaceon. The three walked inside, where Blaze and his Flareon sat back on the couch. "What took you so long, Jet? I'm gonna fine you a whole lot this time!" he said. Dawn sighed. "You only got here recently too, Blaze. Stop trying to make a quick buck." She said, a hint of laughter in her voice. Blaze chuckled. "You know I'm just joking, Dawn. Sheesh."

    The doorbell rang soon after, and Jet answered it. Standing in the doorway was a man in his mid 60's, wearing a lab coat and holding three small gadgets. "Hello there. I'm Professor Oak, from Kanto. I'm looking for Jet, Dawn, and Blaze." Jet smiled and shook the man's hand as Blaze and Dawn walked to his sides. "Well, you can stop looking, professor. I'm Jet, Norman's son. How'd you get here from Kanto so fast, sir?"

    Professor Oak tapped a Pokeball hanging from his belt. "I have my ways. So Jet, tell me, do you know what a Pokedex is?" Jet nodded. "My dad has one. It's a dictionary of Pokemon, right?" Professor Oak nodded, and handed a small, dark blue, rectangular gadget to Jet, a red one to Blaze, and a green one to Dawn. "I've asked many young trainers this, and I'll ask again. I'm much too old to continue my field work, and I must rely on the children of the world to continue my research for me. They've been updated with the pages for your respective companions; Jet has a Glaceon page, Dawn has a Leafeon page, and Blaze has a Flareon page. I hope you all use them well, whether or not you leave Littleroot town at all."

    The three kids immediately opened their Pokedexes and began messing around with the features. "Thank you, Professor!" Dawn remarked as she closed hers. Professor Oak smiled. "Of course, young lady. Consider it a present. It is your birthday, isn't it?" Dawn smiled and nodded. "Yes sir, it is. Thank you very much!" Oak nodded to them and turned around away from the door. "I must go see Norman and Professor Birch. Thank you for what you've done, Jet, and happy birthday, Dawn." Professor said, before he stopped and turned around. "Ah, and Blaze, tell your father I said hello." He said before continuing his walk.

    "Wow." Blaze said. "He must really be important if he knows my dad. Look at this piece of work, Pyro! Isn't it awesome? Look, it even has a picture of you." He said. Jet shook his head, grinning, and then turned to Dawn. "What did you do, Jet?" the blue haired girl inquired. "It's a long story, Dawn. Anyway, since all six of us are here, let's get the party started, shall we?" Jet said. Dawn continued her inquisitive look, but shook it off and nodded. "Sure! My mom made a cake, so let's have at it!" she said.

    Dawn and her two friends ate the cake, Jet and Blaze eating more than half, as they often ate a humongous amount when they were hungry. It was a small party, but Dawn and her friends were the only kids their age in Littleroot, and Dawn preferred it like that. The three Pokemon ate a few poffins that Johanna, Dawn's mother, set out for them, and Jet, Dawn, and Blaze sat around a table, ready to open presents.

    Jet laid the gift from Jirachi on the table, while Blaze put a small bag next to it. "They're a bit small this year, but you'll like them." Blaze said, acting as if he knew what Jet had gotten her. Dawn nodded and opened Blaze's gift first. Inside was a case containing a few poke ball seals. "Seals? Oh, Blaze, how did you know I was saving up for these?" she asked. Blaze grinned, quite full of himself. "Just intuition." Blaze said, chuckling. Jet laughed. "That and hearing her talk about it for about a month." The brown haired trainer added. Dawn opened a few other presents, some from her parents and a few others, all containing Pokemon related gifts, until she had one present left; the one from Jet.

    Dawn looked at the small box. "Looks like you didn't forget after all, Jet!" she said as she picked it up. Jet shrugged. "Y-Yup, didn't forget, no sirree." He said, lying about remembering. He was extremely glad that Jirachi had arrived when it did.

    Dawn's face turned red when she saw the beautiful emerald necklace. She stared at it for a few seconds, and then took it out and clipped it on. "Aw, Jet, it's perfect! You're the BEST!" She said as she gave Jet a flying hug. "G-Glad you like it." Jet said, a bit uncomfortable from the death-grip of a hug from Dawn.

    Dawn stood up and stared at it again. "It's even got Nei's name on it! This must have cost you a fortune, Jet!" Jet smiled, trying to think of a clever story. "I-I ran in on some money. Some rich kid was paying big for someone who could beat him in a battle. I got it custom made for you in Petal-I mean, Rustboro." Jet said, remembering that Petalburg didn't have a jewelry store. Dawn knelt over and showed it to her Leafeon. "Look at how pretty it is, Nei! Say thanks to Jet, okay?" Nei leapt up to Jet's lap and licked his face in thanks.

    "Hey guys," Blaze said, kneeling on a sofa and looking out of a window. "You two have any idea of what 'Team Galactic' is?" he asked. Jet knelt next to Blaze and looked outside to see a few men in strange suits with strange, dome-like hair, and a few others, obviously officers, with different colored hair and more elaborate suits. A truck with the words 'Team Galactic' sat parked outside.

    "Never heard of them." Jet said. Dawn joined them on the sofa, looking out of the window. "Me neither." She said. The men in strange suits and their four officers walked into the town and met up with Norman. "Huh. I wonder what those freaks are up to." Jet said. A tall man with light blue, spiky hair, obviously the leader, stood up to Norman with a demanding look. He said a few words to Norman, who retaliated rather harshly with a few sentences, inaudible from the window. "Uh oh. I don't think that Galactic guy has good intentions." Blaze said.

    Norman finished what he was saying to the man. The tall man stood there for a moment, and then raised his hand to deliver a hard backhanded slap to Norman's face. "Dad!" Jet said as his father flew to the ground. "Glaci!" Union yelled as it charged to the door. The three friends rushed out of the house with their Pokemon following them, and they stood behind Norman, kneeling on the ground. "Dad! Are you okay?" Jet asked. Norman got to a knee, nodding. "Y-yea. Get your Pokemon out. I'll need some help." Norman said, as he stood up and turned his face to Jet and his friends. He was bleeding from his nose. "Jet and Dawn, help me out. Blaze, hurry and go fetch Professor Oak and Professor Rowan. Hurry!" Blaze nodded and ran towards the lab, while Jet and Dawn ordered their Pokemon to stand in front of them.

    The tall man laughed at the group. "Two kids and a gym leader. Alright then. Let's see your pitiful effort." He said, tossing three poke balls to the ground. Out came a Houndoom, a Weavile, and a Gyarodos, three extremely powerful Pokemon. "Alright then. Go, Zangoose!" Norman yelled, as his white-furred Pokemon appeared.

    Jet looked at Dawn. "This is serious if he's using Zangoose. That's his most powerful Pokemon!" he said. Nei and Union cowered in the presence of the huge Gyarodos, but their trainers reassured them.


    "Zangoose! Use slash!" Norman yelled. Zangoose's claws flashed white, and it slashed the mysterious man's Weavile hard. The Weavile flew back a few feet and rolled to its feet. "Union! Icy Wind!" Jet yelled. Union took in air and blew hard at the Houndoom, sending a harsh wind and several ice crystals at the large Pokemon. Houndoom crouched back and unleashed a cone of fire from its mouth, melting the ice crystals instantly. Dawn smiled wickedly at the Gyarodos, knowing she had a type advantage according to what Norman had taught her and her two friends. "Nei! Use Magical Leaf!" Dawn yelled. A dozen colorful leaves materialized over Nei, who sent them flying at the Gyarados. The leaves struck home and Gyarados backed away in pain, and then slithered back.

    The man laughed. "Fools. Your futile attempts are nothing compared to the great dream of I, Cyrus!" he pointed forward. "Weavile! Use Night Slash!" he commanded. The black Pokemon dashed off at quick speed, so fast that it seemed to disappear. It reappeared soon after behind Zangoose, who turned around to meet a harsh slash that sent it flying back. Zangoose rolled away and struggled to get up, eventually getting back on its two feet. "Gyarados! Waste no time! Use Giga Impact!" Cyrus yelled. The Gyarados' eyes turned red, and its' whole body seemed to glow. It backed up, roared loudly, and rammed full speed into Nei, whose small frame was hurled away into the wall of Jet's house. "Nei!" Dawn yelled as she ran to help her Pokemon. "Dad!" Jet yelled. "I've got her covered." Norman said as he tossed another poke ball to the ground. Out came Norman's Hitmonlee, a Pokemon he never used in gym battles due to his position as the 'Normal' type gym leader.

    "Houndoom!" Cyrus yelled. "Use Flamethrower!" The Houndoom repeated the cone of fire, this time aiming towards Union. "Union! Get out the way!" Jet yelled. Union dashed away at a supernatural speed, away from the Houndoom's attack, and behind the Houndoom itself. "Now! Use Aqua Tail!" Jet yelled. Union's tail glowed blue, and it leapt in the air, flipping and striking the Houndoom on the back with its tail. The Houndoom fell to the ground, fainted from the super effective attack. "Impressive, young one. Quite an unusual Glaceon, with a different coloration and a high speed… it would make a fine addition to my team." Jet scooped up a rock and tossed it at Cyrus, who was hit in the forehead. He clutched his head out of anger more than out of pain. "Very well then…" Cyrus said through gritted teeth. "Go! Crobat!" he yelled.

    A Crobat appeared out of the ball and fluttered above the ground, as Norman had his Hitmonlee kick the Weavile, making the Pokemon faint. Cyrus growled angrily at his Weavile. "We can do this all day, Norman!" he yelled as he threw his Honchkrow's poke ball onto the field. "I'll be getting Jirachi one way or another!"

    "Ah, you're here for Jirachi, then." Said an old voice behind Norman. Professor Oak walked next to Norman and held a poke ball, with Professor Birch, Elizabeth, and Blaze behind him. "I see you've followed me around, Cyrus. You've given up living in Sunyshore, and formed a gang, I see? A shame. You would have made a fine technician." Cyrus gritted his teeth again. "Oak, you come and mock me, I see? You'll share the same fate as the gym leader and his son, you old fool.

    Professor Oak chuckled. "Fool, hm?" he said as he gently tossed the poke ball to the ground. "Norman, call Zangoose back. I'll help you." Norman did so, and Oak's poke ball opened to reveal a Skarmory. "I may be old, Cyrus, but age makes no difference in battle. Skarmory! Use Steel Wing! Teach Cyrus a lesson!" he said. Skarmory screeched loudly as it flew towards Gyarados, its left wing shining. It struck the huge snakelike Pokemon at high speed, and Gyarados fell over.

    "So you've still got a bit of use in you, old man. Very well. Gyarados! Come back." Cyrus yelled. "Crobat! Use Cross Poison!" he yelled. Crobat's fangs turned purple, but before it could attack, it was hit by a flying fireball. Cyrus was startled. "What? Who dares?" he yelled. From Route 201 ran a large group of men and women in ridiculous red suits, with large M's imprinted on them. "Team Magma! Attack!" Yelled a red haired man wearing a much less ridiculous suit, a simple red jacket and black pants. The man himself sent out a Camerupt.

    Norman and Professor Oak looked around the town. "Cyrus! What is going on?" Norman demanded. Cyrus scowled. "It appears I have some competition. Mars! Saturn! Jupiter! You know what to do." Cyrus yelled to his officers. The three officers riled the men, and a large number of Pokemon appeared, mostly Glameows and Stunkies. Team Magma retaliated with a large number of fire type Pokemon.

    Norman stared at the scene. "Looks like they're going to battle it amongst themselves…" he remarked. Suddenly, a burst of water came from Route 201. The leader of Team Magma seemed outraged. "Team Aqua! They've followed us!" he yelled. Another group of grunts and commanders charged into Littleroot, wearing striped shirts and blue scarves with skulls on them on their heads. Professor Birch sent out a Lairon, while Elizabeth used Vixen, her nicknamed Ninetales.

    The group from Littleroot town battle fiercely against stragglers from the three teams focusing on them and not their rival teams, but none were strong enough to stand up to Professor Oak's Skarmory. The fight continued on until yet another explosion was heard. A huge black ball emerged from route 201 and hit a Wailord that was on the battlefield. Yet another team of thugs charged in, these thugs wearing black trench coats with white C's on them. They unleashed a large amount of dark, ghost, and psychic Pokemon, and joined the five-way battle.

    "Jet!" Norman yelled over the commotion. "Go get Blaze and Dawn, and take Jirachi out of here! Get to Rustboro and find Roxanne! She'll be able to help you!" Jet nodded and returned Union to his poke ball. Oak patted the boy on the shoulder and handed him a bag. "Inside this bag are my supplies for field work. You'll need them." Oak said. Jet nodded and ran off with Blaze to Jet's house, where Dawn was.

    "Dawn!" Jet yelled. "Dawn, are you alright?" Dawn looked up, tears in her eyes. "I'm alright, b-but… Nei's hurt real bad!" Jet patted her on the back while looking at the unconscious Leafeon. "I'll see if the Professor had anything here to help…" he said, rummaging through the bag until he withdrew a diamond shaped medicine tablet. "Here's a revive. That should make her feel better until we can get to a Pokemon Center." Jet said. Dawn stood up and thanked Jet. "We're going somewhere?" she asked. Jet nodded. "Dad said we have to take Jirachi and get to Rustboro. You should go get Tipi inside while Blaze and I get Jirachi. Hurry!" he said. "Jirachi?" Blaze and Dawn asked simultaneously, but Jet held up his hand. "Later! Hurry!"

    Dawn ran inside the house, Nei in her poke ball, to go fetch Tipi, while Blaze charged toward the lab. The two boys sent out their Pokemon in case there was trouble inside the lab. They opened up the door and saw Jirachi floating behind a desk, scared of the outside conflict. "Jirachi! It's Jet! Come on, we're here to get you out of here!" Jet yelled. Jirachi hurriedly flew to Jet, who unbuttoned the top of his over shirt. "Get in here! Hurry!" he said. Jirachi snuggled against Jet's undershirt and stuck its head out, like a baby kangaroo. "Let's go, Blaze!" Jet yelled. The two boys and their Pokemon ran out of the lab, where they met Dawn and Tipi.

    "Jet, how will we get around them?" Dawn asked. "Remember the forest path we used to play in when we were older? It leads to Oldale. We can use that." Dawn nodded, and looked at Jirachi. "So this is Jirachi?" she asked. "Yea, it is. C'mon, let's get out of here!" Jet shouted. Blaze took off with Pyro, and Jet and Dawn, along with Union followed.

    Norman gripped another poke ball. "We may not be the prime target, but we're losing." He said to Oak. Professor Oak's Skarmory had just fainted after taking out numerous grunts. "I'm afraid it's up to you, old friend." Oak said to a poke ball, which released a Charizard when he threw it. The Charizard began to spew fire at the many Pokemon opposing each other, while Norman looked back at the lab. "Stay safe, kids." He whispered.

    ___________________

    Jet, Dawn, and Blaze quickly maneuvered through the forest, avoiding Spinaraks and other Pokemon, before they finally got to Oldale town an hour later. It was late by the time they arrived, and no one was outside. The sounds of conflict in Littleroot were still heard, but barely. Jet looked around and saw nothing out of the ordinary, and started toward the Pokemon Center when Union cried out. Jet quickly turned to see an Umbreon crouching angrily at Union, who was contrarily sitting with a submissive look. "That Umbreon isn't normal." Dawn remarked. "The rings on its tail, neck, and legs aren't yellow. They're blue! He's differently colored just like…" Jet gasped. "Just like Union."

    A masked man emerged from behind the building the Umbreon was standing in front of. "I see you've met Oblivix, my Umbreon." Said the masked man. He had black hair and stood tall, but not as tall as Cyrus, and wore a black jacket with a white C imprinted on the middle, and dark red pants. His most prominent feature was his mask, which was like a headband that covered one of his eyes and had a hole for the other. His revealed eye was a bright red, and the pupil seemed motionless.

    "We're done with you and those other goons. Leave us alone!" Blaze remarked, Pyro crouching beside him. The masked man laughed. "I am not one of those goons, child." He said, walking forward. "I am Axis, leader of Team Chaos. We are above those pitiful Magmas, Aquas, and Galactics. We strive for something greater. And to achieve such, we need Jirachi. And it seems you've saved me the trouble of finding him."

    Union looked at Oblivix with a loving stare that wasn't returned. "And it appears we've met another differently colored, or 'shiny', Eevee. A Glaceon now, I see. He seems to be a bit reluctant to attack Oblivix, hm?" Jet scowled at the man. "It's because he thinks Oblivix is his brother than ran away when he was a baby, but I doubt it. No Pokemon related to Union could work with an evil guy like you." Axis laughed. "He didn't run. Oblivix was captured by yours truly, my boy. He was the best of two, eager to leave while his weak brother sat and slept. And I obliged, of course, breaking into Bill's lab and stealing Oblivix and raising him until he became the very powerful Umbreon he is now. I didn't expect it ever happening.... but I see that he's met his brother once again, and it's very apparent how they feel about each other, hm?"

    Jet looked at Union, still not willing to attack his long lost brother. He was surprised that the angry Oblivix didn't attack when it looked so willing. It must have at least remembered Union to not want to attack.

    Axis pointed at Jet. "I will give you one week, son of Norman. Three days, and then I shall come and seize Jirachi, whether you like it or not. You can comply and hand it over at our Headquarters near Mossdeep city, or you can keep traveling this futile journey and let me take it by force. Either way, you cannot protect Jirachi." Jet angrily stared at Axis, shaking his head. "Never." Jet said.

    Axis withdrew Oblivix into a black poke ball, and he held it with two fingers. Slowly, it rose into the air, seemingly by Axis's doing. It rose and eventually was at Axis's eye level, where it suddenly caught on fire. "As you can see, I command power greater than your young minds can comprehend. I wouldn't take me and my team so lightly." Axis said as his poke ball lost the fire and fell back to his hands. "One week." Axis said before a column of flame engulfed him and disappeared, taking it along with him.

    "Glai…?" Union said sadly as his brother's trainer disappeared. "Union, let's go." Jet said as he called Union back to his poke ball. The three walked into the Pokemon Center and were greeted by a Nurse named Joy.

    "My my, isn't it a bit late for you kids to be out?" Nurse Joy asked. "We just need a place to stay for the night, ma'am." Dawn said. "We need to get to Rustboro in the morning." She finished. Nurse Joy nodded. "You're welcome to stay, you three. Make yourselves comfortable while I take care of your Pokemon." She said. The three put their poke balls on a tray, and Nurse Joy took the tray to the healing machine.

    The three sat on cushions, the most comfortable thing they could find. Jirachi and Tipi were sound asleep along with Blaze, while Jet and Dawn stayed up, watching a Pokemon contest on TV. Their Pokemon were returned to them soon after Blaze fell asleep, and Jet and Dawn let Nei and Union out to sleep with them.

    "Dawn?" Jet said. "Yea?" she replied. "I'm… sorry all of this happened on your birthday. It's sort of my fault for wishing for something and getting Jirachi's attention." Dawn smiled. "It wasn't your fault, Jet. And besides, I get to travel for a while now, and that's a great present, even better than the necklace you gave me. Sure, I'm worried about everyone back home, but we've got a job to do, and we might as well have fun doing it." Jet nodded. "That reminds me. We've got to protect Jirachi until we find a way to avoid Axis. I wonder how Roxanne will help if she's only a few years older than us." Jet asked. Dawn shrugged. "She's a gym leader for a reason, Jet. She'll know something."

    Dawn stretched and laid back on a cushion next to a fully recovered Nei, and Jet laid next to Union, ready to call it a night.

    "Dawn?" Jet said again. "Hm?" his friend said sleepily.

    "Happy birthday."
     

    Giratina ♀

    what's your sign?
  • 1,439
    Posts
    16
    Years
    • Seen Jul 23, 2013
    Yes, perhaps I was overreacting to the point-gun-to-forehead thing, but as I mentioned later people being out of character is one of the few things that get me ticked off in a fanfic. Sorry.

    What do a lack of EVs have to do with two Eevee being Shiny? In Generation II IVs determine Pokémon shininess, but in later games it's all about the personality and the Trainer IDs. No matter how you slice it or which canon it's in, Shinies are ridiculously rare. We've only seen, what, seven Shinies in twelve seasons of the Pokémon anime; I wouldn't know much about the manga, but I'm willing to bet they don't run rampant there either. Unless your AU says that there are additional ways to determine Pokémon shininess - such as it being an inherited trait from a parent - then the chances are just... well, not promising.

    Alright, that's true, Jirachi is pivotal to the plot. But there are probably sixty other ways to get Jirachi to meet up with Jet and not make it seem quite so jarring - for example, have it happen a few chapters in after one or two "Jirachi plotting scenes" about what's going to happen. Just telling you that your OTs are straying a little close to uncomfortable Suedom.

    You got it! :D

    "Hey," Jet said, still tired.
    Grammar error, though a common one that every writer has grappled with at some point in their life (heck, even me). If there is a tag after dialogue (tag="Jet said", "Lisa boomed", "Dawn wailed", etc.) and the dialogue ends with a period, the period turns to a comma because the sentence is not yet done. This means it becomes "Hey," Jet said, still tired.

    Also, for future reference: If, in a tag, you have "said" or any other non-capitalized verb before the name, it would go like this: "Hey," said Jet. Not "Hey," Said Jet.

    I see now that you really want Jirachi to stick around with Jet, but it would also be worthwhile to add some shocked reactions from strangers - for example, Nurse Joy walking in to see a space-altering god sleeping in a little ball and giving off a squeak of surprise or something. Not exactly necessary every time we meet a new character, but it brings some realism and detail to the scene. I noticed you brought it up with Roxanne, but as a recent graduate of the Trainer's School I think the reaction would be more than a "Oh, he is real? Interesting." (Personally, when my character had to hide a creature who bore a striking resemblance to a Celebi, he stuffed her in the hood of his hoodie and told her to keep her yap shut. I don't know if Jet would react the same way, but still.)

    and that's where Dad catches a lot of his Pokemon.
    Since he is referring to his father and not a random father, Dad is capitalized.

    Dawn begged...Dawn's begging eyes.
    Try to vary your word choice a little. Pleading, worried, etc. would have worked just as well.

    forcing it back a step.
    Minor problem (also one I ran into early on with a Magnemite), but doesn't Ninjask fly? You were probably thinking of Nincada, the prevolution of Ninjask.

    Dawn nodded and patted the Ralts on the head.
    How long were they separated? You'd be hard-pressed to find a Ralts in under two hours, and that's if you were specifically looking for one. Trust me, I've tried.

    It's a slang word, but the proper spelling is "yeah". Silent H.

    Jet tossed a poke ball at the falling Piplup, and it disappeared into the capsule, which fell into the water.
    I hope you have an explanation for a Piplup showing up in Hoenn early routes... :/ Just saying.

    So... yeah. You're still doing okay, but it seemed a little choppy. I recommend using two or three longer scenes instead of five shorter ones; it makes the story a bit easier to follow when things aren't time-shipping left, right, and center. I know I must seem a little harsh, but sometimes things need to be said.
     
    Last edited:

    Unionhack

    Yes Indeed
  • 40
    Posts
    13
    Years
    Okay, I'll address all your problems then.

    Before I start, let me just say the whole *points gun to forehead* was not needed. Grow up a bit.

    Now, I'll say thanks for pointing out the 'enter after a new character comes in to talk' rule was greatly appreciated, and I put it to good use.

    For the likelihood of two Eevees being shiny, it may be 1 in 8192 in the games, but these aren't the games, even though they're based in the same world. It's a bit more realistic if we assume Union and Pyro, etc have no IV's and stuff like that.

    For the whole 'main character meets legendary' argument, let's get something straight. Only in every pokemon movie/manga special/game has there been one character that interacts with every single legendary that exists, and never catches them (cough Ash cough). Complaining about this isn't exactly justified because without Jirachi, there would be no story.

    And lastly, good point with Cyrus, but Birch was just joking.

    Now, I give you the second chapter. Go find some flaws.



    Jet awoke to a cool breeze. Union was using icy wind to wake him up, and it worked. "Alright, Union, lay off, I'm awake." Jet said, still tired, as he sat up. He looked around and saw Dawn awake, patting Nei who was still sleeping. Blaze was still asleep, Pyro in his poke ball, while Jirachi and Tipi slept on a cushion.

    "Good morning, Jet!" Dawn said as she saw Jet sit up.

    "Hey." Jet said, still tired. "How's Nei doing?" he asked. Dawn smiled at her Leafeon.

    "She's feeling better. She's just a little tired." She said.

    Blaze sat up moments later, yawning and stretching. "Good morning. What's for breakfast?" he said, every bit as tired as Jet was.

    "Nurse Joy said she was going to cook something for us. She says we're the first trainers to stay here in a while, because Oldale doesn't have many trainers, so she's happy to do it." Dawn responded. Blaze sent Pyro out from the poke ball.

    "Hey, Pyro. Got a good rest? I hope you're hungry!" Blaze said to his Flareon, who leapt up and down yelping happily. Nurse Joy came in minutes later, bringing eggs and bacon for the kids and poffins for the Pokemon.

    Jet nudged Jirachi awake, who floated up and sat on Jet's head, which was quickly becoming its favorite spot. Jet handed a pink poffin to Jirachi, who cutely nibbled on it. Union picked out a red poffin with blue sprinkles and sat on his master's lap, eating slowly. Everyone ate for a few minutes until Jet had an idea.

    "Hey, you two, let's see what Professor Oak had in his bag." He said, opening the bag. Inside was a pack of thirty poke balls, ten thousand poke dollars, a few potions, a case of revives, a few pens and papers, binoculars, and a camera.

    "Wow, Professor Oak sure does like to be prepared." Blaze remarked. Jet nodded with a smirk, and handed out ten poke balls to both his friends, and kept ten for himself.

    "If we're gonna be on the run, we might as well get some more Pokemon with us to make all of this easier." Jet said. "There's a good field on the way to Petalburg, which is where we're going next on our way to Rustboro, and that's where dad catches a lot of his Pokemon. Let's go!" he said, and leapt up, Union climbing up to his shoulder and Jirachi holding on tight to his head.

    Jet and his two friends left the Pokemon Center after thanking Nurse Joy, and headed west towards Petalburg, down a calm forest road of little activity.

    Jet was impressed. He didn't go to Petalburg often, despite his father's occupation, but when he did, he loved the sights and smells of the road. Dawn and Blaze were looking around all over for Pokemon, but Jet just strode on, relaxed. Suddenly, he heard a small 'Pip' sound as he walked near a pool. Union hopped down from his trainer's shoulders and faced the water, crouched and ready to strike.

    A shape stirred underneath the water, and then burst forth, splashing the whole group with water to Pyro's discontent. A Piplup fell from midair onto the ground and stared at Union. Union bared his fangs as Jet pulled his Pokedex out of his pocket.

    "The Pokedex says this is a Piplup." Jet said. "I've never seen one before. Might as well take advantage of the occasion!" he shouted. "Union! Use quick attack!"

    Union sped forward at a high speed and rammed into the Piplup, who fell into the water. It rose again, its head out of the water, and spat a high pressured stream of water with blistering speed at Union. The water attack made Union fall back, but he quickly recovered. "That was a water gun." Dawn said as she watched. "I'm surprised it was fast enough to hit Union before he could dodge it!"

    Jet smirked. "His water gun may be quick, but Union's quicker! Union! Use Aqua Tail on the water!" he shouted. Union leapt over the water and slapped it with his glowing tail. The resulting splash threw the Piplup high into the air, while Union swam back to shore. Jet tossed a poke ball at the falling Piplup, and it disappeared into the capsule, which fell into the water. Jet and Union ran to the edge of the pond, looking for a sign of the pokeball.

    The buoyant pokeball came out of the water shaking a bit, and then was still. Jet plucked the ball out of the water and tossed it upwards, catching it like a baseball. "That was easy, huh Union?" Jet asked his Glaceon, who shook all the water off his fur onto Jet.

    Dawn giggled for a little while at the spectacle, and then looked around. "Hey, where's Blaze?" she asked aloud. Jet looked around as well, and saw no traces of the boy or his Flareon.

    "Maybe he went into the forest or something, Dawn. Come on, let's go look." He said. He looked down at the pokeball containing the Piplup. "I think I'll call you Neptune." He said, as he fixed the pokeball onto his belt next to Union's.

    Jet and Dawn found an entrance to the forest, but the path was dark and foreboding. "M…Maybe you should go in by yourself, Jet. I'll stay h-here and… wait and see if Blaze comes back." Dawn said. Jet was about to reassure her, when he saw a flash of black and blue in the corner of his eye. He and Union twirled around and saw a black form with shining blue marks leaping away through the forest.

    "Glai!" Union shouted while Jet took down the road.

    "Dawn, come on! Axis must be nearby, and Blaze might be in trouble!" he shouted as Union took off after him. "Aw, come on!" Dawn shouted as she hesitantly gave chase, Nei on her shoulder.

    Jet and Union ran frantically through the forest looking for Oblivix or a sign of Blaze, but found nothing. Eventually, Jet got too tired to keep running, and sat down, Union joining him, as Dawn and Nei caught up. "Can we get out of here, Jet? I think Blaze can handle himself, huh? Please?" Dawn begged. Jet looked up, breathing heavily, at Dawn's begging eyes.

    Jet smiled and shook his head. "Alright, alright. We'll go ahead and walk out. Just don't freak out. It's just a forest." Jet said. Dawn nodded and held Tipi close while Jet stood up.

    "We went in this way," Jet said, pointing towards Oldale's general direction. "So we'll head the other way. There can't be much forest left." Dawn nodded and followed Jet out the forest, keeping close to him out of fear. They continued on when they saw a flash of light not too far ahead of their location.

    "Blaze!" Jet shouted as he ran to the source of the light, Union right behind him.

    "Oh, come on!" Dawn yelled as she ran after her friend, Tipi giggling in her arms. The group ran into a clearing amidst the trees, with Blaze and Pyro sitting down in the middle of it. Light bathed the clearing, unlike the rest of the dark forest.

    "Hey, guys! What took you so long?" Blaze said. Dawn's face got red, and she scowled at Blaze.

    "Don't you know I'm scared of dark places, Blaze? And you left us all alone and Jet and I had to come in here and find you!" she screamed at her friend. Blaze scratched the back of his head.

    "You guys were taking forever. I was just trying to catch a Pokemon, that's all." Blaze said, dropping a poke ball to the ground. Out of the ball came the usual flash, and a Pichu materialized at Blaze's feet. "This is Jolt, everyone. Isn't he cool?" Blaze asked. Jolt tilted his head as he stared at Jet and Dawn, and then Union decided to walk forward and inspect their new companion.

    Union sniffed the baby Pokemon and backed up to get a better look at him. Jolt sat on the ground, his head still tilted and his hand in his mouth, while Jirachi floated from off of Jet's head and joined Union in inspecting the Pichu. "Well, seems like they're getting along. That's good." Jet said.

    Dawn tugged on Jet's arm with her free hand. "Jet? Please? For me?" she asked. Blaze stood up and brought Jolt back into his poke ball.

    "Oh, no you don't, Dawn! You think that every time you beg him for something, you'll get anything you want!" Blaze said. "Right, Jet? Come on, we can stay for a little longer."

    Jet looked at his two friends, and sighed. "Look, we've gotta keep moving, Blaze. I know this is fun and all, but we've got powerful criminal organizations on our tail. We might be able to hold our own against a few grunts, but if we get in Axis's way again, I don't think our Pokemon alone will be enough." He said. Dawn smiled at Jet, while Blaze frowned and shook his head.

    "Alright then, let's get outta here." Blaze said, disappointed. They turned towards a nearby path through the labyrinth of trees and walked away from the clearing.

    ___________

    The group continued walking down the road towards Rustboro, having unintentionally passed by Petalburg City along the way. Jet decided it would be for the best if they saved time and went directly to Rustboro and met Roxanne.

    The road was livelier this time around, with wild Oddish running around and groups of Taillow and Swellow flying overhead. There were also a few trainers down the road, all whom which seemed to pay attention to the group due to Jirachi being with them, but Jet, Dawn, and Blaze politely declined all challenges, preferring to hurry to Rustboro.

    Blaze tried to keep the trek lively by striking up conversations. "So, Jet, Dawn, what are you guys gonna do once we get all of this out of the way?" he asked.

    Jet smiled at Union, who was comfortably riding on his shoulder. "I want to take the League challenge and take down every gym leader in Hoenn, including my dad! After that, I'll probably just travel all over the world, to Sinnoh, Johto, and even Kanto, seeing new places and catching all kinds of Pokemon, to help Professor Oak complete the Pokedex." He said, subconsciously day dreaming as he walked forward. "What about you, Dawn?" he asked.

    Dawn put her hand to her chin in thought. "I'm not sure if I'll take the league challenge, or become a coordinator. Either one sounds pretty fun, and later down the line, I'll probably try to become a breeder, like Ms. Elizabeth." She said, Nei listening intently while walking by her trainer's side.

    Blaze chuckled. "I'll be the best there ever was! I'll beat every challenge that everyone throws at me, and become the champion! Me, Pyro, and all of my Pokemon to come will take our place in history!" he said, slightly shouting.

    Jet smiled at Blaze. "Oh yeah? You'll have to get past me first!" he said to provoke Blaze purposefully.
    Blaze grinned anxiously. "Just wait when this is all over! I'll take you down easy!" he said, Pyro leaping and making a growling sound at Blaze's side.

    Before Jet and Blaze could continue their argument, Dawn pointed forward. "Look! There's the gate to Rustboro!" she said. Jet and Blaze looked forward, and excitedly ran towards the city. "Hey!" Dawn shouted, trailing behind her two friends.

    The three friends awed at the size of Rustboro's buildings and streets while standing at the gate. "How are we going to find the gym in this place?" Jet asked, bewildered.

    Dawn shrugged, Tipi sleeping quietly in her arms. "Maybe we can get directions inside the city." She said.

    Blaze turned towards Jet. "Maybe you should hide Jirachi somewhere. I don't think a big city like this is the best place for him." He said. Jet nodded and lifted Jirachi from his head to the front of him.

    Jet held Jirachi level with his eyes. "Jirachi, I'm sorry, but you've gotta ride in the bag for a little while. You'll be okay, huh?" he asked. Jirachi frowned and sighed, but floated into the bag as Jet opened it. "Don't worry. As soon as we find help, we'll let you out, okay?" he assured Jirachi. Jirachi still frowned, but curled up inside the bag alongside the supplies and fell asleep. Jet gently put the bag over his shoulder and walked on, his friends following him.

    The group found a directory soon after entering the city, and made their way to the Rustboro Gym. They entered into the Gym quickly, not wasting any time.

    The Rustboro Gym was like a huge lighted cave, with rocky formations all over the place and pillars of stone in several places. The floor, however, was flat and smooth, unlike the rough ceiling and walls. Trainers and their rock Pokemon were scattered across the gym, battling each other or training by themselves.

    Jet and his friends walked to the far end of the gym, to a large battle coliseum. A girl no older than sixteen sat on a bench on the side, wearing a short grey dress and pink pants underneath. Her hair was black and was styled in braided orbs.

    "Hello." The girl said as the group approached. "I'm Roxanne, the gym leader." She said as she stood up, her Nosepass and Geodude resting on the bench that she was just sitting on. "If you're looking for a gym challenge, I'm afraid you'll have to wait until I get back from the Pokemon Center. My Pokemon aren't in the best shape after our last fight." She said.

    Jet shook his head. "We're not here for a fight, Roxanne. My name's Jet Sinclair. I'm Norman's son." He said.

    Roxanne smiled immediately at the mention of Norman. "Oh! You're Mr. Norman's son, huh? What brings you here? Your dad need a favor?" she asked.

    Jet nodded. "Littleroot was attacked yesterday afternoon by a few criminal gangs. Me, and my friends Dawn and Blaze here, escaped while Dad and a few others held the front. They might have driven them off, or they might have been beaten. Either way, we need some help finding the gangs and driving them off." He explained.

    Roxanne frowned. "Why would gangs attack Littleroot? Multiple gangs for that matter?"

    Jet sighed. "It's hard to explain, but I'll have to do it anyway…" he said, lowering the bag from his shoulder to the ground and undoing the tie on it. The bag opened, and inside slept Jirachi. "This is Jirachi, Roxanne. It's a Pokemon that can grant wishes. The four gangs: Team Aqua, Magma, Galactic, and Chaos, are all after him." He said, patting the sleeping Pokemon.

    Roxanne stared wide eyed at Jirachi. "So he is real, huh? How'd he get to Littleroot?" she asked.

    Jet, Dawn, and Blaze explained their situation to Roxanne. After a while, they were done, and Roxanne was still no less amazed.

    "Is there anything you can do to help, Roxanne?" Blaze asked the gym leader.

    Roxanne nodded. "I've heard of Team Aqua and Team Magma before, but Galactic and Chaos, I've never heard of. If they're as dangerous as the other two, we'll need some serious backup. I think I can get in contact with the other gym leaders in Hoenn, and I'll see if I can get the international police to help too. In the meantime, if what you say about Axis following you is true, you're going to need more Pokemon, and you're going to need training. Do you each have poke balls?"

    Jet pointed to the poke balls next to Jirachi. Roxanne nodded and then picked up the town map that was also in the bag. "There are a few areas around here where you can catch a few good Pokemon. We've got a nice beach north of here, a dense forest and a path to the east, and a series of caves even farther east. There are plenty Pokemon to catch over there, so try and find some that suit your tastes." She said.

    Blaze nodded. "Now, where do we go once we get a few more Pokemon?" he asked, impatient to catch Pokemon, but understanding the need for plotting their course.

    Roxanne pointed to the far northeast part of Hoenn. "I have a relative in Fortree City, named Bach. He's real old, but he's been studying Pokemon for a long time, especially mythical ones like Jirachi here. You should probably learn more about Jirachi if it's going to be staying with you for a while. Bach can tell you much you need to know."

    Jet nodded and rounded up the supplies and Jirachi in the bag. "So, we catch a few Pokemon, then head north towards Meteor Falls and into Fallarbor, and then east to Fortree. Sounds about right, Roxanne?" he asked the gym leader, who nodded. Jet stood up, Union on one shoulder and the bag slung over his other. "Alright, then. Let's go, guys!" he said. Before he began walking, he turned back and looked at Roxanne. "Thanks a lot. We owe you." He said.

    Dawn and Blaze got up along with him and walked out of the gym, their heads held up high.

    __________


    They reached the path leading to the forest later that afternoon. Gathering at the entrance, Jet, Dawn, and Blaze gathered and discussed a plan.

    "So, how do you two wanna do this? Wanna split up, or stick together?" Jet asked.

    Blaze shrugged. "You saw how well sticking together worked earlier. I say we split up." He said. Dawn, however, disagreed.

    "But, we should stick together in case one of us gets in trouble, huh? I don't wanna go in some cave by myself!" Dawn said in a worried tone.

    Jet shrugged. "Blaze, you can go ahead and do your own thing. Let me talk to Dawn real quick." He said. Blaze looked at the two, cocked an eyebrow and grinned, and then walked off, Pyro and Jolt following him. Jet then looked at Dawn. "Dawn, if you're scared of all of these dark places, you can stay here in the path. They have all kinds of Pokemon here." He said. "And besides, you have Nei and Tipi with you. There's nothing to be afraid of." He continued, sympathetically patting Dawn on the shoulder.

    Dawn shook her head. "It doesn't help to have someone with me. When I was little, my parents and I went to Sinnoh on vacation. When we went to bed at the hotel I had a few real bad dreams several nights in a row. I've been scared of the dark ever since." She said, staring downward.

    Jet kept a sympathetic attitude. "Were the dreams really that bad?" he asked.

    Dawn nodded. "I dreamt that I was alone in a pitch black room, and some ghost-looking thing with one eye just stood there, staring at me. It doesn't sound scary, but it was. Really, it was." She said.

    Jet nodded. "Just stay here on the road to the forest, then. We'll meet up here when we're done, alright?" he asked Dawn. Dawn nodded slowly, still sitting in the grass. Jet knelt down and looked at her. "You sure you're gonna be alright?" he asked.

    Dawn blushed, and quickly shook her head to hide it. "Yea, Jet. I'll be fine. See you later!" she said, as she leapt up, waking Tipi up and startling Nei. They ran off in search of Pokemon, leaving Jet and Union alone.

    Jet pulled out a red poke ball and threw it to the ground. Neptune the Piplup materialized on the ground. "Piplup!" he said as he pointed towards the sky proudly.

    Jet smiled. "Hey, Neptune. You ready to have some fun?" he asked, standing up.

    Neptune puffed out his chest and proudly exclaimed "Pip!" Jet nodded and motioned for Neptune to follow him. Neptune happily skipped along with his trainer down the road.

    ___________

    As soon as Jet and his Pokemon got near any tall grass that was home to Pokemon, a bug catcher ran up to him and challenged him to a battle.

    "When two trainers lock eyes, you have to battle, you know! It's the rules!" the bug catcher shouted. Jet smiled sarcastically and looked at the trainer's belt, which only housed one Pokemon.

    Jet figured an easy win wouldn't take up too much time, so he nodded and grabbed a poke ball. "All right, then, let's do it!" Jet shouted. "Go! Neptune!" he said as he threw the poke ball to the ground, revealing Neptune the Piplup.

    "Go, Ninjask!" the young boy shouted as he threw a green poke ball to the ground, revealing his lone Ninjask.

    Jet grinned and pointed forward. "Neptune! Use Bubble!" Jet shouted. Neptune complied and blew a stream of bubbles at the other trainer's Ninjask. The bubbles burst in the bug Pokemon's face, forcing it back a step.

    The young boy was startled by the sight of his Ninjask being hit with such an attack, being unaccustomed to battles so far. He kept his cool and pointed forward, mimicking Jet. "Ninjask, use String Shot!" he shouted. Ninjask leapt forward and spun a thin silk with its mouth, shooting it at Neptune.

    Neptune got entangled on the spot and struggled to break free. Jet saw the Ninjask walking forward cautiously, ready to attack the helpless Piplup. "Neptune! Use Peck to get rid of all the string!" Jet shouted.

    Neptune responded with a "Pip!" and began furiously pecking at the string. The Ninjask leapt forward and tackled Neptune hard, interrupting his pecking but breaking him out of all the string. Neptune rolled backwards a few feet, and then stood up, shouting a defiant "Piplup!" at his enemy.

    Jet lost his smile, getting serious. "Neptune! Use Peck!" he shouted. Neptune ran forward and leapt into the air, diving at the Ninjask beak first. Neptune struck hard and the Ninjask struggled to stand up.

    Neptune backed away as the bug catcher commanded the Ninjask to use Poison Sting. A poisonous dart came from the Ninjask's mouth, but Neptune leapt out of the way. "Hurry! Use Bubble before it gets to shoot another one!" Jet shouted. Neptune ran forward and blew a flurry of bubbles that blew the Ninjask away. Jet clenched his fist, and Neptune puffed his chest out in victory.

    The bug catcher withdrew his Ninjask and paid Jet the appropriate prize money, and then walked off in disappointment to a Pokemon Center. Jet knelt down and patted Neptune on the head, and then picked him up. "Not bad for your first battle, Neptune!" he said. Neptune squeaked happily, and Jet carried him as they walked into the woods.

    __________

    Jet let Jirachi out of the bag since there were no trainers in the woods, despite the fact that the woods weren't very thick at all. He looked throughout the forest, but found no Pokemon at all. After about an hour of searching, Neptune was asleep in his arms, Jirachi was asleep on his head, and even the calm Union was bored. Jet turned and left, disappointed.

    As Jet turned, something rammed his leg from behind, tripping him and making him drop Neptune. Jirachi and Neptune awoke suddenly, and Union leapt from Jet's shoulder and took a defensive stance.

    Jet got to his feet quickly and turned to see a small Poochyena growling at him. "You're a brave little fella, huh?" Jet said, grinning. "Union! Use Icy Wind! Blow as hard as you can!" he shouted. Union sucked in as much air as he could, and blew it all out with his strength.

    The Poochyena was startled badly, not expecting such a fierce attack. The Icy Wind hit so hard that the Poochyena was frozen on the spot.

    "Nice work, Union." Jet said, tossing a poke ball at the Poochyena, catching it easily. Jet walked over and picked the ball up. "You'll need a name too…" Jet said, pondering until he thought of a good nickname. "Your name is Alturiak. Got it?" he said to the ball, affixing it to his belt. Jet returned Neptune, who was a bit dazed from the fall, back to his poke ball, and he allowed Jirachi to float onto his head once again. Jet walked out of the woods smiling.

    __________

    Dawn was sitting patiently in the grass with Nei, Tipi, and a Ralts when Jet arrived. "Hey, Dawn." Jet said. "Look like you caught one!" he exclaimed.

    Dawn nodded and patted the Ralts on the head. "Her name is Cosmo. She gave Nei a lot of trouble, but eventually she gave in and I caught her." She said. "So, when do you think Blaze is going to get back?" she asked.

    Jet heard a loud 'Woo hoo!' in the back of his ear. "Right about now." He said, turning to see Blaze running down the road, followed by Pyro, Jolt, and a Riolu. He reached the group and leaned over, panting. "Hey Blaze. You got a new friend too, huh?"

    Blaze nodded, still tired. "Yeah… this… this is Skywalker… he's… Riolu…" Blaze said, gasping.

    Jet chuckled. "Walk next time, Blaze." He said. He turned to the way they came. "Let's head back. It's getting late." Jet said. Indeed, the sky was already dark, and stars were appearing.

    Dawn looked up in awe at the beauty. "Hey, you two. You know how our parents never let us go camping before?" she asked her two friends.

    Jet shrugged. "We never really asked. Why?" he said.

    Smiling, Dawn leant back against a tree. "Well, Blaze is tired, so we shouldn't make him walk all the way back, and since we're gonna be on the road for a while, we might as well get used to it, right?" she said.

    Blaze sat down to catch his breath, his three Pokemon joining him. "I agree…" he said, still exhausted. Jet nodded as well.

    Dawn smiled ecstatically. "Alright! This'll be great!" she said happily.


    ___________

    Later that night, the group had set themselves up a few logs to sit on, and a campfire lit by Pyro. Blaze had fallen asleep, and Jet was getting drowsy, lying against the edge of a log with his hands crossed behind his neck, but Dawn was wide awake. However, even though she was wide awake, Dawn wasn't happy.

    Dawn patted Jirachi and Tipi, both whom were in her lap. "Jet," Dawn said, "Do you think we'll be ready when Axis shows up?" she asked.

    Jet yawned and stretched. "I dunno. Guess we won't know till it happens, huh?" he responded.

    Dawn hung her head down, looking at Jirachi. "So, Jet, what exactly did you wish for to make Jirachi appear?" she asked. Jet's eyes widened and his mind raced to find a lie. "I mean, you said you wished on a star, and that's how Jirachi appeared to you."

    "Don't lie. Lying always makes it worse!" Jet told himself, but he made up a lie anyway. "I… uh… wished for… for you to have a good birthday." Jet said, hoping Dawn wouldn't suspect anything.

    Dawn smiled. "Awww, thanks! It was a good birthday. Well, besides the whole gang invasion thing and worrying about Nei after that Gyarados hurt her, but besides that, it was great!" she said.

    Jet sighed a sigh of relief and closed his eyes. "G-Glad to hear it…" he said nervously, hoping not to give anything away.

    Dawn leant back and closed her eyes, but she opened them again, forgetting to say something. "Jet?" she said.

    Jet looked at her with half closed eyes. "Yea?"

    Dawn blushed slightly and looked at her friend. "I… I'm glad me and Blaze got to come with you. I couldn't imagine a day where one of us was missing. This adventure is probably going to be one of the best things that'll ever happen to us, so, thanks."

    Jet nodded and smiled. "It wasn't my idea of a dream vacation, but I'm glad we're all together too." He said, stretching one more time before finally giving in to sleep.

    Dawn looked at the two Pokemon in her arms one more time, smiling before she too propped herself against a log and fell asleep.
     

    Giratina ♀

    what's your sign?
  • 1,439
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    • Seen Jul 23, 2013
    Hilariously, I botched up and pressed the "Edit" button instead of the "Quote" button. Go me.

    Yes, perhaps I was overreacting to the point-gun-to-forehead thing, but as I mentioned later people being out of character is one of the few things that get me ticked off in a fanfic. Sorry.

    What do a lack of EVs have to do with two Eevee being Shiny? In Generation II IVs determine Pokémon shininess, but in later games it's all about the personality and the Trainer IDs. No matter how you slice it or which canon it's in, Shinies are ridiculously rare. We've only seen, what, seven Shinies in twelve seasons of the Pokémon anime; I wouldn't know much about the manga, but I'm willing to bet they don't run rampant there either. Unless your AU says that there are additional ways to determine Pokémon shininess - such as it being an inherited trait from a parent - then the chances are just... well, not promising.

    Alright, that's true, Jirachi is pivotal to the plot. But there are probably sixty other ways to get Jirachi to meet up with Jet and not make it seem quite so jarring - for example, have it happen a few chapters in after one or two "Jirachi plotting scenes" about what's going to happen. Just telling you that your OTs are straying a little close to uncomfortable Suedom.

    You got it! :D

    "Hey," Jet said, still tired.
    Grammar error, though a common one that every writer has grappled with at some point in their life (heck, even me). If there is a tag after dialogue (tag="Jet said", "Lisa boomed", "Dawn wailed", etc.) and the dialogue ends with a period, the period turns to a comma because the sentence is not yet done. This means it becomes "Hey," Jet said, still tired.

    Also, for future reference: If, in a tag, you have "said" or any other non-capitalized verb before the name, it would go like this: "Hey," said Jet. Not "Hey," Said Jet.

    I see now that you really want Jirachi to stick around with Jet, but it would also be worthwhile to add some shocked reactions from strangers - for example, Nurse Joy walking in to see a space-altering god sleeping in a little ball and giving off a squeak of surprise or something. Not exactly necessary every time we meet a new character, but it brings some realism and detail to the scene. I noticed you brought it up with Roxanne, but as a recent graduate of the Trainer's School I think the reaction would be more than a "Oh, he is real? Interesting." (Personally, when my character had to hide a creature who bore a striking resemblance to a Celebi, he stuffed her in the hood of his hoodie and told her to keep her yap shut. I don't know if Jet would react the same way, but still.)

    and that's where Dad catches a lot of his Pokemon.
    Since he is referring to his father and not a random father, Dad is capitalized.

    Dawn begged...Dawn's begging eyes.
    Try to vary your word choice a little. Pleading, worried, etc. would have worked just as well.

    forcing it back a step.
    Minor problem (also one I ran into early on with a Magnemite), but doesn't Ninjask fly? You were probably thinking of Nincada, the prevolution of Ninjask.

    Dawn nodded and patted the Ralts on the head.
    How long were they separated? You'd be hard-pressed to find a Ralts in under two hours, and that's if you were specifically looking for one. Trust me, I've tried.

    It's a slang word, but the proper spelling is "yeah". Silent H.

    Jet tossed a poke ball at the falling Piplup, and it disappeared into the capsule, which fell into the water.
    I hope you have an explanation for a Piplup showing up in Hoenn early routes... :/ Just saying.

    So... yeah. You're still doing okay, but it seemed a little choppy. I recommend using two or three longer scenes instead of five shorter ones; it makes the story a bit easier to follow when things aren't time-shipping left, right, and center.
     
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