"Friend Bless You"

[<<-_Lord-Krishna_->>]

Okay heres anotha quick Rap please post any comments :D

I knew him all my life, ever since we was kids
And even though Im older we would always agree
We grew up in the ghetto without food or green (money)
I can still remember he had such a brave heart
He was so smart
I was so dumb, he tried to warn me but I didnt listen
I took the side of drugs, who was I to think?
I was so addicted I would hardly blink
All my life I hated my alcoholic father
Then I started drinkin and I would even beat my mother
My friend tried to stop me the night I commited murder (not really)
All I remember sayin is "I would never hurt her"
That night I spent it cryin thinkin of what I did
Then I started realizin it should a been me the one dead
I was in jail for thirty years hopin Id get out
My friend came out to bail me how could I say thanks?
I promised I would set all straight and all would be great
Then I did it again I had picked the wrong fight
I was swearing at these gangsters tryin to be the one right
My friend came runnin to my rescue
but the gangsters shot me as I screamed "friend bless you"

 

[Asura Nirosuki]

Wow.This has so much emotion...*sniff* this was beautiful...

 

[<<-_Lord-Krishna_->>]

Thanks it sound better when I actually rap it.

 

[AburameShino]

Ah,Fellow rappers ONE PIECE MY FRIEND!-Peace sign-Ahem..>>;Nice dude maybe i should post up some of my raps along with the BEATS..but yeah Nice,keep it up.

 

[Kyosuke]

It was really good, thats definatly what real rap music is suppose to be about, insted of rapping about money, girls, etc. something mainstream rap is right now...

The only thing I could say is to leave out words, such as 'had' and whatnot, its correct english but it sort of ruins the flow of the whole thing.

Great job I really enjoyed it ^^.

 

[<<-_Lord-Krishna_->>]

thanks I really need to work on this rap more, Ill post my first complete rap as soon as im done wit it. And thanx for da comments