Gardevoir: Always there: A poem

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    • Seen Apr 13, 2020
    I cry for help
    You come to my rescue
    I'm weak
    You protect with your life

    You never leave me
    You wrap me in your arms
    I always feel safe
    I don't have to be afraid

    You hug me and are always kind
    Your gentle voice soothes me
    I can call on you and you will be there
    You always risk your life for me

    Gardevoir, you protect me
    You GUARD me, like you were meant to be
    You're always there
    GARDEVOIR
     
    I love this poem, is it refering to the Mystery Dungeon games?
    But why is guard in capitals?
     
    Nice poem and all, but I noticed it don't flow, also there are words that, while literary, could have been worded better, for example "I call for help" is better than "I cry for help" at least in my opinion and it would kind of make the poem more flowing; as if you're going to have some lengthy words you need to get it bigger overall. I noticed you capitalized "guard" without an apparent need, was it for emphasis? If yes, why? While this do express your feeling to Gardevoir, it could be better, at least in my opinion.
     
    Nice poem and all, but I noticed it don't flow, also there are words that, while literary, could have been worded better, for example "I call for help" is better than "I cry for help" at least in my opinion and it would kind of make the poem more flowing; as if you're going to have some lengthy words you need to get it bigger overall. I noticed you capitalized "guard" without an apparent need, was it for emphasis? If yes, why? While this do express your feeling to Gardevoir, it could be better, at least in my opinion.

    The reason why I capitalized the word "guard" because it was for emphasis. Gardivoir is a protecting pokemon; it protects is trainer with its life. It guards its trainer.
     
    Yeah, but that kind of emphasis is largely unnecessary. I know Gardevoir's a protecting Pokemon without needing to be told that. Even if I wasn't, it would be evident from the rest of the poem, which pretty much doesn't leave any doubt. Capitalising GUARD like that really breaks up whatever flow the poem had, which wasn't terribly much to begin with. Same with GARDEVOIR in the last line - sometimes, less is more.

    Overall, I didn't think this poem was particularly successful. Some lines just don't even make sense - like 'You GUARD me, like you were meant to be' and 'you protect with your life'. For the first one, I don't even know. There's no 'being' going on in that line, so I can't tell what you're referring to. For the second one, 'protect' is a transitive verb, which means you need an object and a subject. I'm guessing you meant 'you protect me', but without that it just seems a bit clumsy.

    The poem gets across your emotional connection with the Pokemon, sure. But it fails because it doesn't give any context or evidence of this connection. There's no mention of Gardevoir actually having to save the Trainer's life, which I think would give a bit more impact. As well as that, the whole 'you guard me, like you were meant to be' thing makes it seem like the Trainer is kind of taking it for granted that his Pokemon will lay down its life for him. As well as that, the constant repetition of 'you protect me, you guard me, you're always there' etc makes it seem like the Trainer is kind of pathetic. There seems to be a lot of reliance on the Pokemon. If that's what you were going for, it could have been a lot clearer. On the whole, this poem was kind of confusing and didn't really go anywhere. There was a story to be told here, but you missed the opportunity.
     
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