Indignation or Imagination?

Missingno.7-4468

The Kazuka Party is for curry!
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    Now, this is just a little poem I wrote a while back. It was originally a shaped poem, with no rhyme or meter, but that shape was impossible to get typed(I tried). Anyway, I hope you like it.
    _________________________
    I stand alone here in the sand,
    Midnight waves calm my mind.
    The highest tide takes my hand,
    Stress and worries I leave behind.

    Without moving I am in the sea,
    While waves quicken their pace,
    I see a thing that puts terror in me,
    And I swim away from this place.

    A swirling mass,
    It churns and spins,
    Oh, alas,
    And sucks me in.

    As I get closer, I think of times
    When things were bad,
    And I remember the lies
    That all made me sad.

    And I remember also,
    The good times as well,
    When everything would glow,
    And things seemed so swell.

    And as I am drawn closer,
    I stop, the flowing ceased.
    And so I swim back to shore,
    As I head due east.

    But before I reach the beach,
    Again I am standing in sand.
    Explaining this with my speech
    Would make it hard to understand.

    Was this experience real,
    Being an indignation?
    Or was it something surreal
    From my imagination?
    _____________________________

    Comments and constructive criticism welcomed.
     
    Last edited:
    Fabulous work you wrote here.
    A couple verses were a little tricky to read in a smooth pace, no big problem.
    The rhyming is pretty well thought up. And a decent concept too.
    Keep at it, and your poetry could be works of brilliance.
     
    I agree with the person above me~ : 3

    I enjoyed a lot from your poem, and your improving well! : D
     
    Thanks. Yeah, I know the meter was off a little. It would have probably been better if this was the original poem, but it's a conversion of a shaped poem I wrote for English class... So yeah...
     
    I see. : )

    I'm looking forward for the poems that you'll write. : D
     
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