Rainbow Chara X
Impossible to gauge!
- 129
- Posts
- 9
- Years
- Shiny Hunting in Sinnoh
- Seen May 12, 2025
I was going to hold off uploading this chapter until my friend finished making portraits for a certain person, but I figured "it's taking too long" and we're going on anyway.
[FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Chapter #8 - Made In Heaven[/FONT][FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]
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It's gonna be a big show. Let's not waste any time.
If you have over 20 Pokemon recorded in your Dex, this guy will give you an Everstone. Pretty much the opposite of what we want, seeing as I'd like to make sure we evolve and not get horribly slaughtered.
Okay, you've got to be yanking me. Was I seriously supposed to wait until the third town to evolve Sathala into a Whimsicott? Everybody else is already way stronger than the poor little puffball, so it doesn't even matter.
The only moves she had before evolving were Mega Drain, Leech Seed and etc. (Correct me if I'm wrong) Grinding naturally would have taken forever due to each battle turning into a stallfest. To get any real viability out of her, I would have had to wait several hours for her to reach half of the required strength to be good in this game.
Mind, Ninetales is easily way more powerful due to having Drought and gets an evolutionary stone as early as Flamen. So uh... what the fresh hell is that all about?
: "Uh, hey Ms. Weatherbell. What are you doing here? If this is a field trip, where are the students?"
Weatherbell: "No-no, this is my hometown. I'm on vacation. I'm letting an assistant of mine take care of the little buggers."
: "I think I met that guy back in the Twist Woodlands."
I don't think we have but I don't really care.
Weatherbell: "Remember our fun battle at the school?"
You know, I'm getting really tired of the whole "I was holding back" thing. Why not just use all of your Pokemon to begin with if you're actually that strong?
I can understand because she's the teacher, but when the villains do it...
How much you want to bet that the "vacation" was actually her grinding for hours until she finally got a half-decent team? Not only that, imagine if you never went to check on Ms. Weatherbell back on the first route. You'll be talking to this lady that you don't know and then she fights you in the middle of town for some stupid reason.
Not that it matters, since Ignell burns up everything she has.
Roserade is honestly one of my favorite Pokemon and the fact I don't have the patience to capture one at this point makes me sad.
Take note of Ignell's level here, by the way. The level curve has been pretty obnoxious as it is, but would you believe me that it actually gets worse?
Oooh, that's good.
How does Dark Rising Girl do it?
Yes, we "trully" have. (I'm at a loss for words, sorry - the game's dialogue is kind of wearing on my soul/commentating abilities)
If I can sweep your entire team with a Pokemon that isn't as broken as a glass house, then you were probably never a good trainer to begin with. Just sayin'.
Also, take a look at the right of the screen. We don't need good tiling - all that matters is the story, am I right? (seriously, as a user of advancemap, i don't understand)
One cool thing about Aroma Town is that you can find wild Pokemon in it. You can find Chikorita in here, but all of the starters are at level 10 regardless of where you go... for some reason.
Anyway, remember the house next to Pete and his dad? Let's go inside and meet someone... special.
[Theme I would use here: Stage 2-2]
This is bound to go bad.
"Beside me is Paul, Arceus's main follower. The house you were talking about was nothing but a mere illusion."
... Then what the hell is Arceus, then? He's literally Pokemon's god of creation!
Actually, believe it or not, Tarea is Dark Rising Girl's in-game avatar. That's what she means by "the Creator." That is so stupid I don't even know how to properly tackle it without losing my mind.
"You, Monica, are the chosen one. You can see more than anybody else. You and Noah have both been chosen by Arceus himself to save the world."
: "And you expect me to believe all of this."
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "However, at your current state, there will be a force ahead strong enough to stop you."
: "What would that be, if I may ask?"
: "Spirits?"
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "Monica, I will give you the power to see the spirits of people and Pokemon that wander around this world in endless suffering. Yearning for something... Seeking to accomplish an act of emotion that cannot happen anymore...:
That's edgy teenager fanfiction for you - I have no idea what the hell she's saying.
: [Confused glare]
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "Touch the mystic triangle of Arceus. It will give you the power that will help you on your journey."
THE MYSTIC TRIANGLE OF ARCEUS -
More like the moldy Dorito that Deoxys left under the couch.
I would transcribe the rest of this dialogue, but it's pretty much just Monica asking "where is dad and what am I going up against" - to which Not-Lorelei goes "lol nope figure it out yourself kid" in the nicest way possible. The actual text is "All will be revealed when the time is right", so chalk it up to the "DRG is creatively bankrupt" board.
Anyway, "Tarea" disappears while leaving info about Darugis - that he's born from negative energy and equal in power to Arceus, if not more so. Normally I would be like "yay power levels are being set" but the story is so uninteresting that I can't get jazzed about it.
[Monica touches the triangle - to which it gets absorbed into her body]
... Well, that's certainly one way of doing things. But wait, what's this?
[An overwhelming amount of light washes over Monica and her Pokemon]
Holy shit, now we're talking!
Everybody's getting a piece of this and it's glorious.
: ("Let's rock.")
: "Holy crap!"
It's official - The game is brown bread
See, Lucario Sigurd has the following stats:
80 / 130 / 100 / 130 / 80 / 115
He is obscenely powerful for a very good reason and even comes with his own signature moves. Sure, he doesn't have them now, but when he does... the game will finally be balanced in my favor. Consequentially, this is a casual reminder that Sigurd is fully playable and there is no reason why you shouldn't use him if he were actually in every copy of the game.
Just take a look at those monster stats. He is ready, man.
I'll reveal what I did in just a bit. For now, we have this -
Spontaneous narration as it actually appears in the game, I wish I were kidding: "What this? There some lights coming from Monica! It became an Item!"
Just showing off Dark Rising Girl's mastery of the English language.
Oh, this is what Not-Lorelei meant by letting us see the spirits of the dead. She could have just said "I'm gonna give you the Silph Scope so you can see ghosts", but that wouldn't have been edgy enough.
: "Throughout the history of the Pokemon universe, there have been many Pokemon who have become legends. Victini the Victory Pokemon... It created the balance between Black and White. It represents the hero. Keldeo the Colt Pokemon... It fought hard to save the world against the frozen might of a powerful dragon and eventually won. It represents the fighter... Noah has chosen the fighter. You, Monica, will now have the Hero by your side."
*Snickers immaturely*
But yeah seriously. The Hero and the Fighter? Isn't that sort of redundant? Plus it doesn't really mean anything seeing as there's no real backstory to those titles aside from pasting Legendaries to the lore.
[Theme I would play right now: The Apprentice 2]
: "Hi~! Nice to meet you, Monica!"
: ("W-what?!")
: "Oh my god, he's super cute. Why didn't anybody warn me about this?"
: ("I guess we're stuck with each other. I'll be glad to help you any way I c-")
[The Victini gasps upon seeing Sigurd - theme changes over to Cry-A-Live]
: ("S-Sigurd?! Is that really you?")
: ("Yeah, it's me! I'm glad to see you're still alive after so long...")
: "Wait, you know each other?"
: ("Yes! We're like brothers. Our history goes as far back as 3000 years ago.")
: "What?! How are you both still alive?!"
: ("I can't age. It's... uh... kinda weird to explain how it works.")
: ("But I'm still a little boy at heart!")
: "... Huh. But how is Sigurd still alive?"
: ("It's... complicated. I don't remember much.")
: ("Come to think about it, I don't either. I just remember being with you and Alberich.")
: "Alberich...?"
: ("Oh, I'm sorry - You're out of the loop on this. See, Alberich used to be our original trainer all those years ago. He was one of the sweetest people you could ever meet.")
: ("Monica is the newest trainer I've come across. She has an insane amount of potential... to the point where I've already reached this form again.")
: ("That's awesome, Sigurd! You and Monica seem like a good couple. Mind if I tag along?")
: ("I'd love to have you. What do you say, Monica?")
: "What, are you kidding?! Of course! What's your name, little guy?"
: ("Call me Siegfried. Glad to meet y--")
[Monica pinches both of his cheeks]
: "I'm sorry, you're just too cute."
: ("Awww, thanks.")
Awwwww snap, here we go. Touching the Pyramid of Power has brought us up to superhuman levels...
Or so I would lead you to believe. See, the game is so unbalanced that grinding to reach the appropriate levels would take a millennium. So I did the next best thing.
We can play double-dumbass.
I am not apologizing for this and it won't be the last time.
By the way, if you decide to go back into the house where Not-Lorelei and the Dorito of Danger were...
... You can induce a goddamn time loop and repeat the event as many times as you want, complete with a new Victini each time.
Each Victini carries Sacred Ash, so that's a free full party revival item every time. Dark Rising has as many game-breaking glitches as Action 52 and is about on the same level of quality.
Oh wait, Action 52 at least had the ultra-catchy Cheetahmen song... so Dark Rising is even worse.
Anyway, let's go face palette-swap Gary Oak - seeing as he's blocking the way.
"Nice work back in the Atlantic Cave."
: "Huh? Who are you? And how do you know my name?"
Not-Gary: "The name's Dray. I'm the number one Pokemon trainer in the world."
I fuckin' doubt anyone here could pass off as genuinely good trainers outside the game. Like you have to keep in mind, Dark Rising Girl just makes everything overpowered/unfair for the player and passes it off as "challenging" but if you know how to turn the tables, it all crumbles.
By the way, this might be a rumor, but I've heard that Dray is short for Drayano - another rom hacker as far as I'm aware. I don't know much about him, but I do have a record of Dark Rising Girl saying that "expert hackers" have okayed this game.
: "Uhh... Sorry, I just met the champ not too long ago."
Dray: "You mean that Ash guy? Please. My father told me stories about this."
He's bringing the sass.
"He wasn't all that, you know?"
: "What, did you say Jean Blake?! That's my father you're talking about."
Dray: "I know, I know. Your father was a pretty impressive trainer back in the day."
It's almost as if Monica takes after him or something.
: "Please, tell me if you know where my father is."
Dray: "You're not too bright, are you? Your father's been captured by Darugis. This evil creature totally wrecked the world way before we were born."
You know, this is sort of the reason why plot-relevant information should be out in the open instead of hidden in places where people won't guess to look... like inside a non-descript house or a place that's not required to be entered at all.
The fact that we have rivals appearing with every step doesn't help matters either, seeing as they've worn out their welcome a long time ago.
Anyway, we're not missing much here. Monica wants to know more info about her dad but Dray is just like "fite me", so we humor him.
Dray would be a slight challenge if it weren't for our supercharged team. At the very least he has one of the least eye-searing palettes out of everybody we've seen.
Gale football tackles his Galvantula and laughs in the face of elemental weaknesses.
You know how I said Siegfried (just roll with it - there's a name rater coming up soon) has a ridiculously overpowered move? Zen Headbutt is where it's at.
Normally Zen Headbutt wouldn't be anything special - it's a good physical Psychic move with the capability to flinch. However, Dark Rising Girl managed to screw up the stats for the move to the point where it has a guaranteed chance to make the enemy flinch every time it hits.
The fact its animation in this game is clearly Uproar doesn't help the cheese factor.
These guys are easy peasy even without the boost in levels. (Also there's a shot of Sigurd's backsprite in case you were curious)
Dray's signature Pokemon is a Druddigon with Leftovers. He tries to be bulky but Corin stomps him out in no time.
I'd get angry about the level curve but this isn't even the best time for it. Just wait for it.
Narration: "Monica begins to talk to himself."
What's the point of a gender choice if you're too lazy to change the dialogue in the game to fit? Like alright I know people do this for a hobby but making a game involves effort even if it's just a fan game.
In-Game Monica notices that the Druddigon is like her father's and Dray says "okay I was just testing you" for the millionth time in this game.
"I gotta admit it's really cool for us to have met like this. Both the children of the coolest members of Team DR."
: ("I swear if this is going where I think it is...")
: "What's Team DR?"
Dray: "How could you not know?"
Roll credits.
"It consists of six members, but it was originally four until your dad joined the clique. Oh, and that Gym Leader Blitz guy too."
Essentially, Dray goes on to say that Team Dark Rising was a secret organization dedicated to stopping havoc around the world. One of their female members, Amaris, has some diaries on Darugis and as such that's where we're going. There, I saved you about at least 30 lines of dialogue.
Anyway, Dray tells us about a party going on in Mystic Falls and how he wants to go. Personally, I'd be more concerned about the embodiment of hatred with a veritable army storming the region but these kids have better priorities. Oh well, at least we get to cash in the S.S. Ticket.
Battle Cave? Sounds promising...
Until you realize it's literally just Diglett's Cave with Fighting type Pokemon.
Hey, it's Black Haired Oak. My save file for this moment was literally titled "omg what do you want prof", which is understandable considering how often we get stopped.
: "Professor Ivan? What are you doing here?"
It's obvious what he's here for - to ruin our day and our progress like everybody else.
: "I'm here conducting research on this area on what attracts rare Pokemon to come here and battle each other."
Monica asks for Dad and the Jewel of Life. Ivan tells us there's a guy in Mystic Falls that might know where it is, so that's all well and good. This information, however, comes with a price.
You son of a bitch. Yet another rival battle?
I guess it can't be helped.
The good Professor should stick to research. Nothing he has is really a threat.
... Barring this level 50 Slaking that somehow managed to tank one of Sigurd's uber Aura Spheres.
Good luck fighting this guy with a normal Pokemon. 150 base health and 160 attack are so godlike that they have to give Slaking Truant just so he doesn't classify as an uber.
To compare, Attack Form Deoxys (the strongest non-mega) has 20 more attack and Snorlax has 10 more health.
NOT BECAUSE I WANTED TO, MIND YOU
Shut up and get out of the way, Prof.
... Nursery Road? Huh. What's all this about?
Oh. It's a playground for baby Pokemon. Every conceivable baby Pokemon is lurking around this place, so that's cool if I ever want to raise one.
Poor Sigurd must have scared this poor little Pichu to death, though. Just sayin'.
[The Pichu cries out and trembles]
: ("Oh jeez, I'm sorry sweetie. Here, how about this shiny thing?")
[Sigurd hands a Star Piece over to her and she calms down]
Appropriately, this is where the Day Care Center is located. Due to the lack of Pokemon Centers around here, the PC in the corner will have to suffice if we want any healing.
Oh my god, I am going to bust an artery.
: "Look. I have more than enough problems to handle right now. I don't need this from you, so I'd appreciate it if you back off."
Arguably the most reasonable thing Monica has said in a long time. My hat's off to you.
: "Problems? You have problems? Tell me, is your family dead? Did you have to suffer while they were punished?!"
: "... What the hell?"
Okay, stop. You are not going to make me feel sorry for this woman if she's going to act like this to random people she doesn't know. She doesn't even have a real reason to antagonize us, which makes it even worse.
: "I AM SYDNEY, THE DRAGON MASTER!"
Okay, that's it. Ever since we made it to the Dread Swamp, it's been nothing but rival battles with some plot thrown in. Let me just list off the amount of people we've fought in sequential order:
Sydney (second encounter) -> Kayo (Not Silver) -> some prick from the Omni Region -> Darugis Brock -> Noah -> V (Pink Cyrus) -> Darugis Brock with Entei -> Pete -> Dray -> Professor Ivan and now Sydney for a third time.
Can you fucking CHILL IT with the rival battles? Like jesus christ, it's bad enough that there's practically no real plot aside from "Darugis is a bad guy we need to go take him down" but why do we have to fight every single person we know?
(By the way, I mean that. I've checked what's coming up and it's literally every single person we know.)
Can you blame anybody for being intimidated by Sigurd? His stats and his appearance sort of make him out to be like the Antichrist.
Sydney, honey, every important person in this game has a dragon. If you reached this point and you had to keep up level-wise with the game, then there is no way this lowly Fraxure could keep up with your ultra-badass Dragon starter.
: ("Oi, that tickles! Quit it!")
[Arthur used Megahorn!]
: ("Eh. I gave them a warning. Can't blame me.")
Poor Larvesta had no idea what she was getting herself into.
: ("You again?!")
: ("Sorry, I don't have the time.")
: ("D-damn you..")
: ("Hey, here's a thought. Maybe we wouldn't be fighting if your trainer wasn't hassling Monica.")
No she's not, In-Game Monica. She's one of the easiest people in this entire section.
Now, there is absolutely nothing stopping you from ignoring Sydney and just leaving her in the dust. Still, I should summarize what happens if you talk to her.
: "Darugis took my family! Kayo is involved somehow!"
: "I thought Darugis was just recently causing trouble??"
: "What do you think this is, Pokemon Stadium? You need to pay for the damages you did to this post!"
This shuts up the officer for some reason. I am not missing anything here.
I am very curious as to what a map of this place looks like. I'm also curious if Fly ever gets used at all during the game.
It's not so private when you actively attack someone who just wants to pass through.
The trainers would have perfectly reasonable levels... if this were vanilla Pokemon. I don't understand this game, okay.
: "Better than you can imagine, baby."
[One fight later]
It's a combination of the two. Random trainers are not stopping us any time soon.
Anyway, let's just go and get this over w--
What the hell?
[Theme I would use here: Illusionary World]
: "Hey, what's the deal?"
: ("... I've found you.")
[A Gardevoir materializes in front of Monica]
: "Whoa! A Gardevoir?!"
[Heartache]
: ("You reek with the same energy as that Darugis entity...")
: "Wait, what?"
: ("Prepare yourself.")
: ("I'll destroy you, demon.")
: ("Throw whatever you want at me, but I'm not fighting back. I'd rather not hurt someone who doesn't deserve it.")
[The Gardevoir concentrates her powers with a Calm Mind but Siegfried jumps between the two]
: ("Don't hurt Sigurd!")
: ("Wh-what?")
: ("You've got the wrong guy. Please, let's just talk this through.")
: ("... I'm confused. Are you really not the same person? Oh well, it can't hurt to talk.")
[Replay Illusionary World]
: "What's the deal, miss? Why'd you attack me and my crew for no reason?"
: ("Ah... See, I was taken away from my own trainer and forced into this new region by an entity that calls himself Darugis. He possessed every trainer in sight in order to wear me down. Your Lucario friend's powers had the same intensity as his, so please forgive me for mixing them up.")
: ("I'm used to that sort of thing. Please, don't feel bad about it.")
Ouch.
: "Wow, that sounds pretty brutal, miss... Uh... What's your name, miss?"
: ("My name is Bellamine. It's a pleasure to meet you... now that we're not trying to tear each others' throats out.")
: "Ha, same. My name is Monica. This is Sigurd and Siegfried. We're traveling to get rid of this Darugis guy too."
: ("Ah, I see. You remind me of my trainer, actually... Would you mind if I come with you?")
: "I'm down with it."
: ("Not at all, miss Bellamine!")
: ("You're not the first person to try and kill me, actually... But hey. For me, that's just the start of a new relationship.")
Yep. For those of you who have never read the Snakewood Let's Play (go read through it please), Bellamine was the Gardevoir I had in that playthrough. Her level is the same as it was at the end of that game, and even comes with a neat little item called the Sand Cloak which is pretty much Bright Powder (lowers enemy accuracy) but cooler.
I have a feeling we're going to need her along for this adventure, if only to help me riff the game. (Because trust me it gets worse)
I hate forced encounters.
Casual reminder: Ninetales are Death Gods in this game thanks to Drought, so I was foolish to not grab one earlier.
Also, check this out: Drought was still in effect, Fire Punch gets a STAB boost and Siegfried is about 20 or so levels higher than the Exeggutor.
There's not even ash left of the poor thing.
You were so easy you bored Sigurd to sleep, apparently.
Will this ever be relevant? I doubt it.
Apparently we won the Fight Club Lottery or something because these guys don't stop coming.
Blah blah, son of Jean Blake, great potential, yadda yadda.
Ivan's friend there is Zachary and he's related to our dad in some way. However, this conversation is a bit... different from most others we've had up to now.
: "Nice to meet you, Zachary."
: "I can't really say the same..."
: "Now, Zachary, be polite."
"This child's father refused to destroy Darugis all those years ago. Now the current generation has to deal with the beast."
Wow, you asshole. Monica, on the other hand, tells him off in the best way possible.
: "Look, that's not my fault. I don't know what fully happened back then, but I'm pretty sure my father and his Pokemon put their lives on the line to save the world from Darugis. I'm willing to do the same. Another thing, "Zachary", I'm not a child anymore. Both me and my Pokemon have grown strong."
Excellent. Don't let that bitter old coot bring you down.
: "Oh, is that so? Battle me, smart mouth."
Oh goody, here we go again.
Zachery here has a weird team. Don't be fooled - that's not the Generation 5 Pokemon Accelgor - that's the brand new fakemon called Accellgor. Do you want to know how they're different?
Real Accelgor can't learn Calm Mind. So as far as I'm concerned, the one letter difference makes them a completely new Pokemon.
Between Sigurd's Aura Spheres and Siegfried's Fire Punches, there's nothing he has that can stop the crew.
Suck it, old man.
: "Damn skippy you were."
I'm just gonna summarize what both Ivan and Zachary say here:
: "You are the chosen one, Monica."
: "I can sense the Jewel of Life in Voltair Forest. Also, to catch Arceus you need a Master Ball. You can find them in Iceland City."
Yeah, it wouldn't be a JRPG if we didn't save the world. Oh yes, before I forget:
If you go back to the place where you fought Ivan, you will be forced to fight him again... but this time he won't actually be there. The same thing applies to the Zachary event here, but it's even worse as it blocks you from leaving until you beat him.
I've already made my Action 52 quote of the day so we'll just leave it at that.
Anyway, thank god we're finally done with this one. Next time on Pokemon Dark Rising, I don't even pretend to have patience with this game anymore!
See you then.
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Team setup:
(Corin, level 66, has Dragon Fang,
,
/
) - "I like the people we keep running into. They seem nice."
(Sigurd, level 64,
,
/
) - "So let me get this straight... I meet my best friend after god knows how long and a Gardevoir from another region nearly tries to kill me. Definitely a normal day for us."
(Siegfried, level 63,
,
/
) - "It's never boring with you guys around, apparently! Cheer up, Sigurd. Everything turned out alright!"
(Gale, level 65,
,
/
) - "... To think, if I never met Monica, I wouldn't be on this big adventure with you guys."
(Arthur, level 59,
,
/
) - "Funny how fate works, doesn't it? I'm just glad to finally be an Escavalier!"
(Wave, level 64,
,
) - "Siegfried is such a lil' cutie. He makes me forget about all of the crazy crap we go through on a regular occasion."
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Back up team:
(Bellamine, level 72, has Sand Cloak,
,
) - "Hello! It's very nice to meet all of you... In fact, you remind me of my friends back home."
(Lumis, level 62,
,
) - "Charmed, to be sure. You seem like a very... upstanding woman, Bellamine."
(Ignell, level 62,
,
/
) - "Indeed! Welcome to our merry band of misfits, madam."
(Sathala, level 56,
,
) - "The new guy is super cuuuute!~ Oh, and miss Bellamine looks cool."
(Vera, level 44,
,
) - "Ah. It seems I haven't fully evolved. That's a shame."
(Cinder, level 40,
,
) - "Yo! I like meeting new people! So where do you come from, miss Bellamine?"
[FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Chapter #8 - Made In Heaven[/FONT][FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]
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Spoiler:
It's gonna be a big show. Let's not waste any time.
If you have over 20 Pokemon recorded in your Dex, this guy will give you an Everstone. Pretty much the opposite of what we want, seeing as I'd like to make sure we evolve and not get horribly slaughtered.
Okay, you've got to be yanking me. Was I seriously supposed to wait until the third town to evolve Sathala into a Whimsicott? Everybody else is already way stronger than the poor little puffball, so it doesn't even matter.
The only moves she had before evolving were Mega Drain, Leech Seed and etc. (Correct me if I'm wrong) Grinding naturally would have taken forever due to each battle turning into a stallfest. To get any real viability out of her, I would have had to wait several hours for her to reach half of the required strength to be good in this game.
Mind, Ninetales is easily way more powerful due to having Drought and gets an evolutionary stone as early as Flamen. So uh... what the fresh hell is that all about?
Weatherbell: "No-no, this is my hometown. I'm on vacation. I'm letting an assistant of mine take care of the little buggers."
I don't think we have but I don't really care.
Weatherbell: "Remember our fun battle at the school?"
You know, I'm getting really tired of the whole "I was holding back" thing. Why not just use all of your Pokemon to begin with if you're actually that strong?
I can understand because she's the teacher, but when the villains do it...
How much you want to bet that the "vacation" was actually her grinding for hours until she finally got a half-decent team? Not only that, imagine if you never went to check on Ms. Weatherbell back on the first route. You'll be talking to this lady that you don't know and then she fights you in the middle of town for some stupid reason.
Not that it matters, since Ignell burns up everything she has.
Roserade is honestly one of my favorite Pokemon and the fact I don't have the patience to capture one at this point makes me sad.
Take note of Ignell's level here, by the way. The level curve has been pretty obnoxious as it is, but would you believe me that it actually gets worse?
Oooh, that's good.
How does Dark Rising Girl do it?
Yes, we "trully" have. (I'm at a loss for words, sorry - the game's dialogue is kind of wearing on my soul/commentating abilities)
If I can sweep your entire team with a Pokemon that isn't as broken as a glass house, then you were probably never a good trainer to begin with. Just sayin'.
Also, take a look at the right of the screen. We don't need good tiling - all that matters is the story, am I right? (seriously, as a user of advancemap, i don't understand)
One cool thing about Aroma Town is that you can find wild Pokemon in it. You can find Chikorita in here, but all of the starters are at level 10 regardless of where you go... for some reason.
Anyway, remember the house next to Pete and his dad? Let's go inside and meet someone... special.
[Theme I would use here: Stage 2-2]
This is bound to go bad.
"Beside me is Paul, Arceus's main follower. The house you were talking about was nothing but a mere illusion."
... Then what the hell is Arceus, then? He's literally Pokemon's god of creation!
Actually, believe it or not, Tarea is Dark Rising Girl's in-game avatar. That's what she means by "the Creator." That is so stupid I don't even know how to properly tackle it without losing my mind.
"You, Monica, are the chosen one. You can see more than anybody else. You and Noah have both been chosen by Arceus himself to save the world."
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "However, at your current state, there will be a force ahead strong enough to stop you."
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "Monica, I will give you the power to see the spirits of people and Pokemon that wander around this world in endless suffering. Yearning for something... Seeking to accomplish an act of emotion that cannot happen anymore...:
That's edgy teenager fanfiction for you - I have no idea what the hell she's saying.
Definitely Not-Lorelei: "Touch the mystic triangle of Arceus. It will give you the power that will help you on your journey."
THE MYSTIC TRIANGLE OF ARCEUS -
More like the moldy Dorito that Deoxys left under the couch.
I would transcribe the rest of this dialogue, but it's pretty much just Monica asking "where is dad and what am I going up against" - to which Not-Lorelei goes "lol nope figure it out yourself kid" in the nicest way possible. The actual text is "All will be revealed when the time is right", so chalk it up to the "DRG is creatively bankrupt" board.
Anyway, "Tarea" disappears while leaving info about Darugis - that he's born from negative energy and equal in power to Arceus, if not more so. Normally I would be like "yay power levels are being set" but the story is so uninteresting that I can't get jazzed about it.
[Monica touches the triangle - to which it gets absorbed into her body]
... Well, that's certainly one way of doing things. But wait, what's this?
[An overwhelming amount of light washes over Monica and her Pokemon]
Holy shit, now we're talking!
Everybody's getting a piece of this and it's glorious.
See, Lucario Sigurd has the following stats:
80 / 130 / 100 / 130 / 80 / 115
He is obscenely powerful for a very good reason and even comes with his own signature moves. Sure, he doesn't have them now, but when he does... the game will finally be balanced in my favor. Consequentially, this is a casual reminder that Sigurd is fully playable and there is no reason why you shouldn't use him if he were actually in every copy of the game.
Just take a look at those monster stats. He is ready, man.
I'll reveal what I did in just a bit. For now, we have this -
Spontaneous narration as it actually appears in the game, I wish I were kidding: "What this? There some lights coming from Monica! It became an Item!"
Just showing off Dark Rising Girl's mastery of the English language.
Oh, this is what Not-Lorelei meant by letting us see the spirits of the dead. She could have just said "I'm gonna give you the Silph Scope so you can see ghosts", but that wouldn't have been edgy enough.
*Snickers immaturely*
But yeah seriously. The Hero and the Fighter? Isn't that sort of redundant? Plus it doesn't really mean anything seeing as there's no real backstory to those titles aside from pasting Legendaries to the lore.
[Theme I would play right now: The Apprentice 2]
[The Victini gasps upon seeing Sigurd - theme changes over to Cry-A-Live]
[Monica pinches both of his cheeks]
Awwwww snap, here we go. Touching the Pyramid of Power has brought us up to superhuman levels...
Or so I would lead you to believe. See, the game is so unbalanced that grinding to reach the appropriate levels would take a millennium. So I did the next best thing.
We can play double-dumbass.
I am not apologizing for this and it won't be the last time.
By the way, if you decide to go back into the house where Not-Lorelei and the Dorito of Danger were...
... You can induce a goddamn time loop and repeat the event as many times as you want, complete with a new Victini each time.
Each Victini carries Sacred Ash, so that's a free full party revival item every time. Dark Rising has as many game-breaking glitches as Action 52 and is about on the same level of quality.
Oh wait, Action 52 at least had the ultra-catchy Cheetahmen song... so Dark Rising is even worse.
Anyway, let's go face palette-swap Gary Oak - seeing as he's blocking the way.
"Nice work back in the Atlantic Cave."
Not-Gary: "The name's Dray. I'm the number one Pokemon trainer in the world."
I fuckin' doubt anyone here could pass off as genuinely good trainers outside the game. Like you have to keep in mind, Dark Rising Girl just makes everything overpowered/unfair for the player and passes it off as "challenging" but if you know how to turn the tables, it all crumbles.
By the way, this might be a rumor, but I've heard that Dray is short for Drayano - another rom hacker as far as I'm aware. I don't know much about him, but I do have a record of Dark Rising Girl saying that "expert hackers" have okayed this game.
Dray: "You mean that Ash guy? Please. My father told me stories about this."
He's bringing the sass.
"He wasn't all that, you know?"
Dray: "I know, I know. Your father was a pretty impressive trainer back in the day."
It's almost as if Monica takes after him or something.
Dray: "You're not too bright, are you? Your father's been captured by Darugis. This evil creature totally wrecked the world way before we were born."
You know, this is sort of the reason why plot-relevant information should be out in the open instead of hidden in places where people won't guess to look... like inside a non-descript house or a place that's not required to be entered at all.
The fact that we have rivals appearing with every step doesn't help matters either, seeing as they've worn out their welcome a long time ago.
Anyway, we're not missing much here. Monica wants to know more info about her dad but Dray is just like "fite me", so we humor him.
Dray would be a slight challenge if it weren't for our supercharged team. At the very least he has one of the least eye-searing palettes out of everybody we've seen.
Gale football tackles his Galvantula and laughs in the face of elemental weaknesses.
You know how I said Siegfried (just roll with it - there's a name rater coming up soon) has a ridiculously overpowered move? Zen Headbutt is where it's at.
Normally Zen Headbutt wouldn't be anything special - it's a good physical Psychic move with the capability to flinch. However, Dark Rising Girl managed to screw up the stats for the move to the point where it has a guaranteed chance to make the enemy flinch every time it hits.
The fact its animation in this game is clearly Uproar doesn't help the cheese factor.
These guys are easy peasy even without the boost in levels. (Also there's a shot of Sigurd's backsprite in case you were curious)
Dray's signature Pokemon is a Druddigon with Leftovers. He tries to be bulky but Corin stomps him out in no time.
I'd get angry about the level curve but this isn't even the best time for it. Just wait for it.
Narration: "Monica begins to talk to himself."
What's the point of a gender choice if you're too lazy to change the dialogue in the game to fit? Like alright I know people do this for a hobby but making a game involves effort even if it's just a fan game.
In-Game Monica notices that the Druddigon is like her father's and Dray says "okay I was just testing you" for the millionth time in this game.
"I gotta admit it's really cool for us to have met like this. Both the children of the coolest members of Team DR."
Dray: "How could you not know?"
Roll credits.
"It consists of six members, but it was originally four until your dad joined the clique. Oh, and that Gym Leader Blitz guy too."
Essentially, Dray goes on to say that Team Dark Rising was a secret organization dedicated to stopping havoc around the world. One of their female members, Amaris, has some diaries on Darugis and as such that's where we're going. There, I saved you about at least 30 lines of dialogue.
Anyway, Dray tells us about a party going on in Mystic Falls and how he wants to go. Personally, I'd be more concerned about the embodiment of hatred with a veritable army storming the region but these kids have better priorities. Oh well, at least we get to cash in the S.S. Ticket.
Battle Cave? Sounds promising...
Until you realize it's literally just Diglett's Cave with Fighting type Pokemon.
Hey, it's Black Haired Oak. My save file for this moment was literally titled "omg what do you want prof", which is understandable considering how often we get stopped.
It's obvious what he's here for - to ruin our day and our progress like everybody else.
Monica asks for Dad and the Jewel of Life. Ivan tells us there's a guy in Mystic Falls that might know where it is, so that's all well and good. This information, however, comes with a price.
You son of a bitch. Yet another rival battle?
I guess it can't be helped.
The good Professor should stick to research. Nothing he has is really a threat.
... Barring this level 50 Slaking that somehow managed to tank one of Sigurd's uber Aura Spheres.
Good luck fighting this guy with a normal Pokemon. 150 base health and 160 attack are so godlike that they have to give Slaking Truant just so he doesn't classify as an uber.
To compare, Attack Form Deoxys (the strongest non-mega) has 20 more attack and Snorlax has 10 more health.
NOT BECAUSE I WANTED TO, MIND YOU
Shut up and get out of the way, Prof.
... Nursery Road? Huh. What's all this about?
Oh. It's a playground for baby Pokemon. Every conceivable baby Pokemon is lurking around this place, so that's cool if I ever want to raise one.
Poor Sigurd must have scared this poor little Pichu to death, though. Just sayin'.
[The Pichu cries out and trembles]
[Sigurd hands a Star Piece over to her and she calms down]
Appropriately, this is where the Day Care Center is located. Due to the lack of Pokemon Centers around here, the PC in the corner will have to suffice if we want any healing.
Oh my god, I am going to bust an artery.
Arguably the most reasonable thing Monica has said in a long time. My hat's off to you.
Okay, stop. You are not going to make me feel sorry for this woman if she's going to act like this to random people she doesn't know. She doesn't even have a real reason to antagonize us, which makes it even worse.
Okay, that's it. Ever since we made it to the Dread Swamp, it's been nothing but rival battles with some plot thrown in. Let me just list off the amount of people we've fought in sequential order:
Sydney (second encounter) -> Kayo (Not Silver) -> some prick from the Omni Region -> Darugis Brock -> Noah -> V (Pink Cyrus) -> Darugis Brock with Entei -> Pete -> Dray -> Professor Ivan and now Sydney for a third time.
Can you fucking CHILL IT with the rival battles? Like jesus christ, it's bad enough that there's practically no real plot aside from "Darugis is a bad guy we need to go take him down" but why do we have to fight every single person we know?
(By the way, I mean that. I've checked what's coming up and it's literally every single person we know.)
Can you blame anybody for being intimidated by Sigurd? His stats and his appearance sort of make him out to be like the Antichrist.
Sydney, honey, every important person in this game has a dragon. If you reached this point and you had to keep up level-wise with the game, then there is no way this lowly Fraxure could keep up with your ultra-badass Dragon starter.
[Arthur used Megahorn!]
Poor Larvesta had no idea what she was getting herself into.
No she's not, In-Game Monica. She's one of the easiest people in this entire section.
Now, there is absolutely nothing stopping you from ignoring Sydney and just leaving her in the dust. Still, I should summarize what happens if you talk to her.
This shuts up the officer for some reason. I am not missing anything here.
I am very curious as to what a map of this place looks like. I'm also curious if Fly ever gets used at all during the game.
It's not so private when you actively attack someone who just wants to pass through.
The trainers would have perfectly reasonable levels... if this were vanilla Pokemon. I don't understand this game, okay.
[One fight later]
It's a combination of the two. Random trainers are not stopping us any time soon.
Anyway, let's just go and get this over w--
What the hell?
[Theme I would use here: Illusionary World]
[A Gardevoir materializes in front of Monica]
[Heartache]
[The Gardevoir concentrates her powers with a Calm Mind but Siegfried jumps between the two]
[Replay Illusionary World]
Ouch.
Yep. For those of you who have never read the Snakewood Let's Play (go read through it please), Bellamine was the Gardevoir I had in that playthrough. Her level is the same as it was at the end of that game, and even comes with a neat little item called the Sand Cloak which is pretty much Bright Powder (lowers enemy accuracy) but cooler.
I have a feeling we're going to need her along for this adventure, if only to help me riff the game. (Because trust me it gets worse)
I hate forced encounters.
Casual reminder: Ninetales are Death Gods in this game thanks to Drought, so I was foolish to not grab one earlier.
Also, check this out: Drought was still in effect, Fire Punch gets a STAB boost and Siegfried is about 20 or so levels higher than the Exeggutor.
There's not even ash left of the poor thing.
You were so easy you bored Sigurd to sleep, apparently.
Will this ever be relevant? I doubt it.
Apparently we won the Fight Club Lottery or something because these guys don't stop coming.
Blah blah, son of Jean Blake, great potential, yadda yadda.
Ivan's friend there is Zachary and he's related to our dad in some way. However, this conversation is a bit... different from most others we've had up to now.
"This child's father refused to destroy Darugis all those years ago. Now the current generation has to deal with the beast."
Wow, you asshole. Monica, on the other hand, tells him off in the best way possible.
Excellent. Don't let that bitter old coot bring you down.
Oh goody, here we go again.
Zachery here has a weird team. Don't be fooled - that's not the Generation 5 Pokemon Accelgor - that's the brand new fakemon called Accellgor. Do you want to know how they're different?
Real Accelgor can't learn Calm Mind. So as far as I'm concerned, the one letter difference makes them a completely new Pokemon.
Between Sigurd's Aura Spheres and Siegfried's Fire Punches, there's nothing he has that can stop the crew.
Suck it, old man.
I'm just gonna summarize what both Ivan and Zachary say here:
Yeah, it wouldn't be a JRPG if we didn't save the world. Oh yes, before I forget:
If you go back to the place where you fought Ivan, you will be forced to fight him again... but this time he won't actually be there. The same thing applies to the Zachary event here, but it's even worse as it blocks you from leaving until you beat him.
I've already made my Action 52 quote of the day so we'll just leave it at that.
Anyway, thank god we're finally done with this one. Next time on Pokemon Dark Rising, I don't even pretend to have patience with this game anymore!
See you then.
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Team setup:
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Back up team: