Mr Cat Dog
Frasier says it best
- 11,344
- Posts
- 20
- Years
- Age 34
- London, UK
- Seen Sep 29, 2017
The advantage of coming from an RP background is that description is nearly vital to succeed well - at least from my experience. So... it's good that you've pulled it off quite well. The use of dialogue is good, as there isn't loads of it, but there still is enough to keep the flow of the story going. Well done ^_^
You do have spelling and grammar flaws, but they're nothing major - and MS Word can sort those out for you. This does however make the cliche-ometer explode severely. This does all seem very predictable... and probably will continue to be unless you add in the plot twist of some kind. The Mew saga can only really carry on for a limited time, and can't be the only thing stopping this from being another countless predicatble OT fic.
Well, if you add something like a plot twist in, then this looks as if it could turn out quite well. ^_^
You do have spelling and grammar flaws, but they're nothing major - and MS Word can sort those out for you. This does however make the cliche-ometer explode severely. This does all seem very predictable... and probably will continue to be unless you add in the plot twist of some kind. The Mew saga can only really carry on for a limited time, and can't be the only thing stopping this from being another countless predicatble OT fic.
Well, if you add something like a plot twist in, then this looks as if it could turn out quite well. ^_^