• Our friends from the Johto Times are hosting a favorite Pokémon poll - and we'd love for you to participate! Click here for information on how to vote for your favorites!
  • Welcome to PokéCommunity! Register now and join one of the best fan communities on the 'net to talk Pokémon and more! We are not affiliated with The Pokémon Company or Nintendo.

my first attempt at a sonnet

Finglonger

Leper messiah
  • 329
    Posts
    20
    Years
    yeah well I posted this one a while back, but that was when nobody was posting in this area and it kind of got ignored. well anyhow I really set into this piece recently. I did a lot of editing and a lot of rewording, so tell me what you think, and what you think I can improve on. This is dedicated to a very good friend of mine, someday I hope it's good enough to give it to her.

    Seduction in B minor

    The curtains draw; amidst an ornate velvet sheet
    A welcomed shade from daylights heat
    Tenor sings in slumber blanket sheets, so night's
    moonbeams dance in seductive lights.

    Basses sing low, memorium in her dark repose
    sounds embrace, mingling as the music grows.
    Crescendo!Crescendo! the Maestro cries,
    altos sigh, love spread in sultry skies.
    Strings tussle 'neath the moonlit night,
    with winds of which they used to fight.
    She cries...night's climax is her clasp
    retold in melody, opulence, begins to gasp

    And as the curtain slowly closes with a hush
    she turns to him, her face begins to blush.
     
    ^_^;; It is original. As I have always said, everyone has their own style, and no matter what anyone else says, that person's poems will always be flawless so long as it came from the heart. Well done, Finglonger.

    ~Kelsey
     
    thanks = ), its a work in progress, actually I'm looking for suggestions to improve upon it. eh, anybody?
     
    Back
    Top