My "Haiku"

[Rokeriukas]

For those who understand it and don't , here is a short description:
"Haiku is a type of japanese poetry.Through nature you express human emotions."
I recently found out about this kind of poetry, and to tell you the truth I'm really intrested in it.Here is one from my scrapbook:
"Two small flies, it's a suprise they ever met, are mating on a rose."
I think true poets will understand the meaning of that Haiku.
I'm currently working on other one, I'll finish pretty soon ^^, C&C.
Another one:
"An enermous tree is blocking the sun that gives life to a flower."

And another one:

"A beatiful butterfly flies through the path of flowers with her daily routine troubles everyday, but once she makes friends with a black spider, now the butterfly flaps her wings with no care..."

 

[DrCoolSanta]

I heard of them earlier, on some other forums.
Can't contribute but I'd like to see more of Haikus.

 

[Rokeriukas]

Thanks for the comment ^^, just check the topic daily and you will find more and more ^^.
EDIT A NEW ONE:
"An enermous tree is blocking the sun that gives life to a flower"

 

[El Gofre]

I hate to be picky but the structures wrong, it should be 3 lines with 5 sylables, 7 sylables, 5 sylables.

 

[melod.ii ous demyx~♪]

Gofre's right~
^-^ They almost have the perfect syllables. [Except the first one x_x]
But, the {enter} key, is magic in this area.

Example:

Flick.er.ing. Can.dle. (5) Shines. Bright. in. the. dark.est. Room. (7) No.one. blow. it. out. (5)

That's just an example, but I like your thread alot~
And your poetry. Alot of it sounds really beautiful.
;-; I liked the fly one too. So, keep it, just without the Haiku title.

Wonderful work~ I hope you keep posting more.

 

[Rokeriukas]

Thanks ^^,I guess, I should rename it , and keep it as "Half-Haiku", I didn't expect such comments ^^.

 

[Rokeriukas]

(Sorry for double post)A new haiku, I think it had a pretty deep thought:
"A beatiful butterfly flies through the path of flowers with her daily routine troubles everyday, but once she makes friends with a black spider, now the butterfly flaps her wings with no care..."
Tell me what you think ^^.

 

[El Gofre]

Again, you're kind of off structure-wise. Can you put each line on a new line so we can see the syllable break up please?
I got bored so i made this:
I'll make a haiku
I wonder when i will start
Oh wait i am done :)

Not overly creative, i was just bored more than anything.
I may have to start my own poetry thread soon, might post some of my A level work :P

 

[Ikouze]

this is to the president of USA (well old president - george bush)

A bomb appears
It blows up in your face
shame you big bastard

 

[melod.ii ous demyx~♪]

Rokeriukas:
O.o" It's got WAY too many syllables now~ <3
heh, I still liked the poem, except, like Gofre mentioned, seperating the lines for us to read would be so thoughtful of you. n_n

See, the entire poem in a haiku only adds up to 17 syllables (the breathy space in each word). So, keep posting~ You'll get it, they're already good. Just work on the format. ^^

Gofre:
n_n that's cute, I'm amazed your advice worked itself out so wonderfully~

Ikouze:
._. Sad~
Heh, nice idea though, except... you're lacking two syllables from the first two lines also. No big deal, except for calling it a Haiku. Which you didn't o.o So, I guess it's fine~ XD;

Good job~