Umm.
I don't really like obsessive fangirls either, but, some things I want to say...:
1.) Satoshi is his Japanese name. Some people prefer "Satoshi" over "Ash." You can't bash people's preferences.
2.) True. Haha.
3.) You're a guy. :\ Have you EVER EVER EVER seen a guy call another guy handsome or anything like that? Doubt it.
4.) Uh. Like you said, he's twelve. That's too young to really worry about love or anything. So, just because of that, he's gay? It's a show; it doesn't have to relate to real life (aka little ten-thirteen year olds having cute little crushes and/or thinking they're in love)
5.) Lol... A lot of people on this forum are probably 13 and under, too, so... If they're over that, though, then that is kind of creepy.