Our Journey- A...song...oO;

[Eliana]

Well, I'm not posting this in my poem thread (Kels dont mind XD) Because:
1) This isn't 100% my work...this is almost the exact same song, but translated from Hebrew. However, I think I changed it a bit, so I can call it my work.
2) Its a song...so it wouldnt fit in. XD

Our Journey

The quiets returned, you smile once more,
You watch the calmed sea, after the storm.
The light protects us, we will go on,
And no the journey is not yet gone…

Your eyes are shining with light,
Blooming fields are yet in sight,
More mountain peaks are yet to come,
But just remember…our journey is not done.

Shafts of light, reflect your tears,
But you can lean on me, have no fear.
You are my shining glory, in the dark,
When the candle dies, you're there from the start.
I won't let you down; you don't have to hide,
Just remember- I'll be there forever, by your side.

Your eyes are shining with light,
Blooming fields are yet in sight,
More mountain peaks are yet to come,
But just remember…our journey is not done.

--EDITED--

Our Journey

The silence has returned; you smile once more
You watch the sea after the storm.
The light protects us; we will go on,
No, the journey is not yet done…

Tears glisten in your eyes;
But blooming fields are still in sight
More mountain peaks are yet to come,
But just remember…our journey is not done.

Shafts of light reflect your tears
but I'm right here- there's nothing to fear.
You're my shining glory in the dark;
There to light my severed heart.
I won't let you down; you don't have to hide
Just remember- I'll forever be with you, by your side.

Your eyes are shining with light,
Blooming fields are yet in sight,
More mountain peaks are yet to come,
But just remember…our journey is not done.

 

[Lizzie]

eli that's beauitiful ^_^ great job! it kinda reminds me abuot how the learning process never ends, there's aways something to learn or to see ^_^ makes me feel positive about learning :D

 

[Kyosuke]

Nice poem Eliana it really describes how times might be hard, but in the very end everything will be alright. This could work either way, as a poem or a song so its hard to tell what it was meant to be had you not explained ^^.

The words and metaphors that you used such as, "Blooming fields are yet in sight,
More mountain peaks are yet to come", really tells that a lot will get worse, but some things have gotten better. If that made any sense XD, just know that you did a great job translating it, and changing it a bit ^^'.

 

[Eliana]

Right...XD Nice try Lance XD
Its just good ol' mountain peaks, but if you say so, lol. Thanks! ^___^

You too Lela!

 

[Shana]

That's a really sweet song, Eli. ^^

 

[Eliana]

Awww, thanks! ^__^
I believe it's about a couple who fought, but I'm not sure...