Pokémon Infinity (hand drawn fan comic)

[Kumata]

Introducing the latest Pokémon webcomic, courtesy of myself and Savvy! The comic is scripted, drawn and edited by the two of us, so the art style will fluctuate accordingly.

(Sorry if this is in the wrong forum! Please move it accordingly!)

Pokémon Infinity

The comic is hosted on our website, which can be found at: www.robocomics.com​

Summary
In the region of Pelua, the Pokémon League Championships have once again begun! Two aspiring young trainers, Oscar and Bill, embark on a quest with their newly-obtained Pokémon to explore the mysteries of Pelua, create their 'dream teams', and conquer the Pokémon League!​

The comic
Prologue
Comic 1
Comic 2
Comic 3
Chapter 1
Title page
Comic 1
Comic 2
Comic 3
Comic 4
Comic 5
Comic 6
​

Well, it's not incredible, but we've all gotta start somewhere, right?​

Yes, the comic will be featuring a number of original Pokémon created by Savvy and me. Don't worry, we plan on updating the site with a Pokédex so you can keep track of them. If you have any ideas or suggestions for new Pokémon, let us know - we may very well incorporate them into the comic!​

Pokémon Infinity will be updated every Friday, but with any luck we'll build momentum and start updating twice, maybe three times a week.​

We're already a part of the Drawn Pokémon Comic Alliance, but would like to get the word out about the comic in as many places as possible. If you'd like to help advertise our comic, here's a handy banner for you:

And that's everything! Fire away with your comments and constructive criticisms! Even advice about the site itself is welcome!​

 

[ShinjisLover]

Right away I can tell you need a lot of work before starting a comic. Your people are drawn fairly crappily. Their faces are much too fat and have no defined structure, especially where the cheekbones are. Their heads are also too big for their bodies. Their bodies should be bigger as the human head is only one-fifth of the whole entire body, believe it or not. Two thirds are the legs and the other two thirds is the torso (including the pelvis, stomach, chest, and neck).

Comic 1
Again, the human's face is too fat. The thick black lines are the borders are annoying and should be thin black lines with white surrounding them instead. This will also give it a more clean-cut professional look. Also, when drawing, you make your lines just a tad too thick.

Comic 2
The eyebrows on your human come off the head like they're really, really bushy. This is usually okay for a more cartoon-ish comic. But, considering this is a manga, I wouldn't do that. In the panel with the Poké Ball, the Pokémon isn't completely rounded and the bottom looks sort of lopsided.

Comic 3
In the final panel, the hand is drawn with his fingers much too thick. Also, instead of looking like his leg is just facing backwards, it looks like it's much smaller than his other leg. This is because you hadn't put a separate line showing where the thigh of the leg ended and the knee and shin began.

Title page
Reviewed that when I first began way up there ^.

Comic 1
Okay, it's hard to review the art when I can barely see it. There is way too much talking going on. I'd say that talking should be dealt evenly by making sure that only one person is talking every panel. Anymore than that, and it's overkill (*is starting to wonder if they should make manga making tutorials. . Probably needs more practice first*). Overall, the people are very badly drawn. It was much better in the Prologue, actually. You need much more work before beginning a manga. I'd say practice more and try again.

And Rose's boobs just got bigger or something. *twitch*​

 

[Kumata]

This isn't a manga! I didn't mean to imply that by comparing it to the special manga!

Cheers for the critique regardless. We're not going to stop, practise then try again - this is practise.

 

[☆Patched☆]

Instead of just using just grayscale colors, why not try screentoning. It'll give it more of a manga feel.

It gets a bit confusing reading the text bubbles. Like, the first one you should read is on the bottom. Anatomy needs work. They have slightly big heads, and their eyes are out of place. (o.e Also...what does Rose do to her--)

Also, you switch between saying it's a commic and saying it's a manga. I'm a little confused, because I'm not sure which way I should read it (could you please state that in the first post)

Overall it's good. Just needs some editing is all. ;)

 

[Kumata]

It seems that my mention of the Pokémon Special Manga was misconstrued... this isn't a manga.

 

[Roboevil]

New updates and profiles!

 

[Kumata]

We have updated again! This comic is the first one we made, so it's noticeably bad... things only get better from here on though!

 

[Roconza]

I think the comic fine but screen tones sounds good but they can be a pain. FYI to others the art is not what matters it's the story so lay off. Look at popular series like metal gear awesome, the art is less then realistic but but it's good

Hang in there .

 

[Kumata]

Thanks the support! We have updated yet again!

 

[Yuoaman]

I actually like the style, it's like a mix of manga style and traditional comic books that reminds me of VGCats for some reason. I wish you guys luck, you've already made a fan in me.

 

[Kumata]

Awesome! We update once again, introducing the last of the three starters and a new character!

 

[rando serian]

As I am no longer an artist, I will refrain from commenting on the artwork, mostly because I believe to each their own style. However as a writer that does both professional and fan-workds I must point out something I have learned in my years of writing. Starting off a new series with a battle, not just a battle, but a battle with unfamiliar characters is a good way to lose readers quickly. The only reason why series such as pokemon began with a battle in the first episode was because they were attempting to connect it with the opening of the video game.

If you take a look at most Action Oriented American Comics and Japanese Battle Manga (A term used to refer to manga similar to Dragon Ball, One Piece, Naruto) almost none of them open with a battle, this is because even though readers enjoy seeing a battle in comics and Manga, they prefer to have some knowledge of the world in which the story takes place before the action begins. Not only that but you have the series move too quickly for most readers to get into it, there's no need to move a story too quickly, in fact most series that move that quickly in the beginning end up running into problems later on. And then there's the fact that you decided too, in a fashion similar to more than half of the percentage of pokemon fanfic writers and fanartists, to open with Fanmade starter pokemon, which has become an overused scenario. I must say that I'm glad you didn't start with the most overused pokemon fanfiction beginning, which is to have a new Villain Team, or even an existing Villain Team, tracking down some legendary pokemon, either from the series or fanmade.

Now don't get me wrong, I actually enjoy fanmade pokemon, some are actually quite original. But only one of your fanmade starters impressed me and that one hasn't even been shown on the pages of your comic and can only be seen in the about section. As for the other two... the idea of a mammalian water and grass pokemon for starters is interesting... but kangaroos are more associated with deserts, kickboxing, and stealing the coats of fat black guys than they are with water. As for the grass starter, there has been pretty much one pig, pig-like, or pokemon with pig-like features, introduced in each generation of pokemon; Gen 1(Mankey - Primeape (Pig-like Feature)), Gen 2 (Swinub - Piloswine (Pig-like(Boar))), Gen 3 (Spoink - Grumpig (Pigs)), & Gen 4 (Mamoswine (Pig-Like(Boar/Mammoth))), so it is believable, but boring.

That's it from a first glance... there's not much to go on right now...

 

[Kumata]

Good to hear you like our fire starter (who has actually shown its face)! Another new update!

 

[Roboevil]

Updated last night dudes!!

 

[Kumata]

Updated again as promised!

 

[LDUK]

Ha! This is awesome! I love the new cartooning approach. I think the fact that it's not a Manga makes this more unique and is another reason why I like it. It's different, but it's still pokémon. Now I'm not saying it doesn't need work but I think your going in the right direction. I can see this being a great spin off. Nice work.

 

[Kumata]

Updated once more! The shading took me ages so you'd better like it!

 

[Vriksha]

a real good style humn.......!!!