Return to Hogwarts

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I lookd up at her fiercely and hissed, "Who said I had ever left..." I laughed bitterly and stretched out on the floor, saying, "But it doesn't matter to you, after all. Or rather, you shouldn't be involved. Stay out of my life." I finished in a rough tone, yanking my arm from her seat and returning to the other side of the compartment in icy silence.
 
I winced noticably. I was suddenly very angry with this boy. Who did he think he was? I glared at him for a long moment before speaking.

And when I did, I exploded.

"WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO ANTISOCIAL!?!?" I screamed.

Thinking better of myself, I elaborated.

"Don't sit there and tell me to stay out of your life. I made no move to try and get in it. I am just trying to be curtious. You're the one who came in here and sat down in the first place! You're the one who had the episode! I didn't do anything wrong!"

THe anger frothed inside me. I was losing myself again. My hood fell back, my canines sharpened into fangs. I didn't care if he saw, now. There was too much anger, too much that had been building up inside me. I needed blood, now. Not just wanted, needed.

Something inside me egged me on, and something else fought to control it. I fell back against my seat, shaking in a sever seizure. My head was pounding with the force of the voices screaming orders at me. Trilla's tongue licked my hand, but I couldn't even feel that. I was lost to the world, half of me demanding blood, the other demanding control and sanity.
 
I swiftly, silently slipped my wand from my robe pocket and held it by my side. I said in a low drawl, "Calm down, girl. Take it easy, eh? No need to freak out."

I slid my wand a little further forward, a little higher. Closer to ready in case it proved necessary. She was obviously not a full human, but at the moment, not any more than a minor threat. Violence was not prudent if I could talk her down.
 
Control won.

THankfully.

I settled down on the seat, or at least, stopped shaking. Tears slipped down my cheeks as I started trembling instead of seizuring. My teeth had shrunk again. At least for now. I'd need my knife later tonight, but for now, I was all right.

Physically, at least. Emotionally....

That was an entirely different story.

"Sit down, Antisocial," I attempted to spit, even though it came out as more of a shakey, hurt plea.
 
"Know before you speak," I spat. I really had no purpose in saying it. It was something my mother had been fond of saying. Nonetheless, I resumed my seat and slipped my wand back into my pocket. I muttered to myself, "Not that you'd really want to hear about it."
 
I winced as the light in the compartment began to bother me. Pulling my hood back over my eyes, I moved to sit gently next to him. My steps in the process were very shakey, but I made it nonetheless. I sat next to the window, pulling my feet up on the seat, allowing my knees to slide close to my chest. I sat so that I could look directly at him, my back to the window. He could see my eyes through the hood, I didn't pull it down that far.

"You'd be suprised," I said slowly, softly. "If you want to talk about it, I'm willing to listen. I'm good at listening. Always have been."
 
I snorted softly and said, "Heh. Doubt you have the friends to tell it to anyways." Perhaps it was cruel, but I would much prefer to push her away before she found out anything and potentially interfered. I stretched again and felt my elbows and knees pop. I winced slightly as one of my ankles rolled the wrong way. I had taken a landing poorly on it several days ago and it hadn't fully healed yet.
 
I watched the pain flit across his face. I knew full well that I wasn't to do magic outside of the school, and thus, couldn't help immediatly.

I remembered the old T-shirt in my trunk. Rising, I pulled it out and tore it into one, long strip. "Let me see that ankle," I said softly, but firmly. "If you're not going to talk to me about whatever it is that's bothering you so much, you'd at least better be in decent enough physical shape to do something about it."
 
I glared at her and said, "I'll do it anyways. But fine. It'll make my task easier." My expression softened for a moment at her tenderness, then flashed back to its typical brusqueness as I said, "Thanks." I said it about as roughly as I'd intended, but I did mean it. It was rather unexpected of her. Especially towards me. I closed my eyes and sighed, letting tightly coiled, controlled anger burn through me.
 
I pulled off his shoe gently. Healing had always been a specialty of mine. I wasn't very good at anything with magic, but in the relationship I'd previously been in... I shook myself mentally. At least I'd learned to heal myself through that.

As I gently rolled off his sock, I couldn't help but wince. "How long have you been letting this fester?" I asked gently, a little concern seeping through my voice. The ankle was swollen and bruised.

I started wrapping the ankle tightly, pondering to myself. Perhaps my knack for healing was just my way of compensating for all the hurt I tended to do thanks to my... lusts. As I tied off the make-shift bandage and rose back to take my previous seat next to him.

"I'd suggest going to see Madam Nishen when we get to the school. I think you may have broken something. That kind of swelling and bruising means at least a fracture. Madam Nishen can fix you up a lot better than I, anyways."

Trilla bounced back into my lap. I gently stroaked her back and looked back to him. "And, your right. I don't have the friends to tell. I don't have any friends at all. Never have. The only thing I've ever had was an overbearing boyfriend, and that's long over now. Trilla here's my only companion. And we've done just fine."
 
I began laughing, somewhat bitterly though it was more on the mad side of things. I said, "Do you have any siblings? Cousins you're close to? Anyone? Have them yanked from your arms, kicking and screaming? Or not, becaue they're unconcious." I began laughing again, then continued, "Perhaps you should before you hear my tale."

I snapped ou of my fit and resumed my seat on the train, saying, "Thank you for the bandage. I appreciate it."
 
I winced. "I lost my mother to childbirth. My father ran off immediatly afterwards when he found out that I was magical. My aunt and uncle who took me in are childless. My aunt suffered from cervical cancer when she was very young, and this made her infertile."

My eyes glazed over slightly as I continued. "It's hard for me to get close to people anymore. NOt since him..."

I shook myself again, tenderly reaching out to touch his shoulder. "But all of that is really unnecissarily pointless. Leito, if you ever need someone to come to, I'll be around, okay? I'm not gaurenteeing that we'll be best friends, because my trust is easilly destroyed. But, I'll be around if you want to talk."

With that, I moved back to my side of the compartment. "As for the bandage, it's no big deal."
 
"I would rather that," I said in a dead tone, not particularly caring about the end of her statement. "I would rather that a thousand times over than my own life."

I smiled hollowly at her and said, "I was born in France. Slums of Paris. No money, no postal. I dropped out of school when I was seven. Not to sell drugs for my father, because the schools left. Then the cops, when I was nine. It was a gang war. The Federal, the put a wall around us and waited for us to self-destruct. Total gang war, constant gunshots. Automatics, mostly.

They came for us one day. My parents, I guess. I was ten, my sister was sixteen. The gunned down my mom and dad. Not just gunned down. Emptied clips, the bodies were a bloody pulp on the floor. Didn't care about me. What would the government care about slum murders. It was what they wanted. But they found my sister. Kidnapped her. She's 22 now. Last I heard, the leader of that gang keeps her chained to his wrist.

"She's why I live. Why I'll die. I hold no illusions about my fate. I'll die saving her. It's worth it."

I glared at the pair of them, saying, "Never breathe word of this. The death of those bastards is what I dream about. I will do anything to make it come true. Bodies can be hidden."
 
I winced at his last statement. "I'm not about to tell anyone," I whispered, holding Trilla tightly to me. "There is no need to threaten Trilla's life."

I really didn't care about my own.

I pulled my knees back to my chest, biting the inside of my lower lip to get a little satisfaction. It was marvelous, if small.

I was a monster. This I knew. I didn't care if he took my life. But Trilla would live. She hadn't done anything wrong.

Somehow, I got the feeling that he was threatening me emptilly.

"Be careful, all right?" I said quietly, almost inaudibly.
 
"As careful as I can," I said in soft reply. "I doubt I'll be coming back, though." I stretched out again and said, "If I could have some silence for a time, it would be appreciated. I need to collect myself."
 
I nodded and pulled my transfiguration book back to me, flipping through it absently, quietly. I was hard to focus on anything now.

Not come back?

But why?

I sighed. Best not to think about it. I laughed inwardly. I knew full well that I wasn't getting close to this kid. Couldn't afford it. And it was obvious that he didn't want it either. That was fine with me. What did I care if he got himself killed?

Somewhere inside me, however, I did.

I sighed and flipped my pocket knife open, draging it down the inside of my arm. I figured Leito was in too deep of a trance to notice anyways.
 
OOC: Guess who's baacckkkk! No, don't guess, that was an easy question, lol. Welll I've gotten permission to control 2 characters, and seeing how very few users are still RPing, I'm hoping that I'll become a valuble contribution to the RP. It's been awhile, so it might take me a few posts to get back into the groove of things, lol...

Rehan Zahin

Age: 16

Year: 5

Gender: Male

Appearence: Rehan has pale, mocha skin, and short, black hair with almost a ruffly texture that he normally gels straight on the top of his head, and his bangs up in the front. He has a smooth jaw, and his angular face belongs to a set of deep, dark-brown, oval eyes that sharpen on either side. His broad shoulders and medium frame give him a masculine appearance, not exactly 'ripped', but toned, none-the-less.

Personality: At a glance, no one would expect rehan to be a wizard. He is probably as close to a muggle as a wizard could get. Other than in classes and when it is 100% necassary, Rehan tends not to use magic at all. Not because he is against it, but more because he doesn't want to depend on it. His marks are nowhere near 'good'. Instead, he tends to do meet the minimum expectations of the school, but is a considerate person, and confident in his judgement. He does not anger easily, so once someone is on his bad side, it is very rare that he forgives them. Rehan is fairly athletic. He's not good at any particular sports, but he enjoys staying active and playing sports for the heck of it. He doesn't go out of his way to get to the weight-room, nor does he make an effort to go jogging... He is active solely because he enjoys it, and is only a little more fit than the average 16 year-old because of it.

History: See below

House: Gryffindor

Other: Rehan has a male, red/ white patched tabby cat named 'patches'

Zameena Zahin

Age: 13

Year: 1

Gender: Female

Appearence: Zameena, like Rehan, is a pale, mocha color. She has wavy, almost frizzy, black hair that goes down to the middle of her back, but is normally tied up. she stands at 5'6", and has a very small frame. She has, glossy, almond-shaped, amber eyes that are normally covered up by a pair of thin-framed, black glasses.

Personality: Not having much in common with her brother, she spends most of her time indoors, socializing and studying. She gets her marks, not because she is considered 'naturally smart', but just because she is a hard worker. When she sets her mind to something, she NEVER gives up, and will let absolutely nothing get in her way. It is her determination and eagerness to be successful that sets her aside from her relaxed, easy-going brother. She has a business mind-set, and selects every relationship she makes in 2 ways; The personality of the other person always comes first, but she'll never forget to consider how knowing that person could benefit her in the future.

History: See below

House: Unknown

Other: Zameena has been receiving annual letters of acceptance from Hogwarts for three years now, but has denied the opportunity every other year because the thought of a world where magic was real frightened her. After maturing years later, and realizing how magic could help her in the future, she is now excited to see what this new world has to offer to her.

History

Rehan and Zameena were born and have grown up in London, England, and are of East-Indian decent, living a fairly middle-class life. Their parents are both magically inclined, but their mother is a 'mudblood'. Rehan and Zameena have a 9 year-old brother named Khalil who is somewhat amused by the stories he has heard Rehan tell so far about Hogwarts, and would be excited to attend the school one day himself.

RP Sample: Rehan walked into a compartment wearing a pair of blue jeans, beige hiking boots, a black T-shirt, and a white, hooded sweater-jacket, finding Zameena in a pair of blue jeans and white runners, wearing a white blouse, sleeves scrunched up half-way as she held Patches quietly.

'I don't know if you've already heard, but there's a couple of people just a little bit away from us, a guy and a girl. They seem pretty... Uhh... They're having an 'interesting' conversation...' Rehan spat out as he sat down across from Zameena, rolling her eyes.

'You were eavesdropping on them? Now that's sad...' She stated, adding a touch a bitterness to her last few words.

'How much longer do we have to be here for? I want to get everything settled in and just relax for a little bit... See who I'm going to be spending my next year with. I can't see Sandy or Nora for a whole year now 'cause of this, so it'd better be worth it...' Rehan gave Zameena a sour look, running his fingers through his thick hair, adjusting his bangs, still stiff from the gel he'd applied earlier.

'It's not like they'll miss you,' Rehan responded with sarcasm. Zameena stuck out her tongue at Rehan, lifting her feet onto the bench she was sitting on, adjusting herself while trying not to agitate Patches. With a sigh, she leaned against the wall, and watched as the scenery sped past the window... Until Rehan stood up, and got in the way.

'Move!!' She screeched, using her feet to push him aside. Patches quickly jumped out of her arms, and out the entrance of the compartment.

'... Good job...' He said, still sarcastic, following Patches out the door and into the hall.

'... Maybe that's why he said to leave Patches in the cage...?' Zameena recalled earlier, peaking out into the hall now, following slowly behind Rehan.
 
I took a deep breath and let my eyes flicker closed in the instant before the knife was opened. I slipped away, not into my usual lighter trance, but into a full meditative state. I needed to collect myself from my blowup. I had thought I had tighter reign on my emotions than that shameful display. Not only that, but I had told her! She said she wouldn't interfere, but... Well, if it came to that, I could end her life.
 
OOC: Of course, RT has already been accepted. *laughs* I think I pretty much threatened him to join anyways.

BIC: I shifted out of view from the window of the compartment, now hidden back in the corner of my seat. I pulled my feet onto the seat and let the steel blade slip down over my flesh, leaving a small scratch behind.

Natalia, came a nervous prod.

I ignored her. It had been a while since I'd felt so worthless. In fact, this was the first time that I'd ever let myself pull the blade out on the train, even in public. Normally, I was in the bathroom or in my dorm with the curtains of my four-poster bed closed tightly around myself.

But right now, after remembering him, I couldn't help it.

His eyes were cold above me. Seventeen years of hardened muscle pinned my arms down above my head. I struggled beneath him, but my fifteen-year-old frame was weak and frail against his.

"Stop struggling. If you love me, you'll let me."

His hands had found my pants and were quickly removing them. I was scared. I kept asking him to stop. He wouldn't.

~~~~~~

I listened to him pant, my eyes full of tears and my body sore and bruised.

"God, you're worthless, you know?" he laughed. "You weren't even any good."

"I'm not any good," I whispered to myself, pushing the blade down tighter. A drop of blood welled up from under the steel. "I'm worthless. No one could ever love me."

Those three sentences kept escaping my mouth in a sick parody of a mantra. The blade worked deeper and deeper, and then began extending down over my forearm, moving towards the viens in my wrist.

Trilla squealed and lept off the seat, scooting over to where Leito sat in a trance. She looked back, and seeing my own eyes glazed over, the mantra still repeating endlessly in a dead tone from my mouth, she tenativly pawed at his leg.
 
My eyes snapped open before I had truly had the time to collect myself. Annoyed, I was about to kick the fox acros the compartment when I saw what had been worrying her. I sighed, "One of those, huh?" before I stood. I took the long step across the compartment and sat beside her, snatching the knife from her hand. I closed it, bounced it once in my hand And slipped it into my pocket.

I hissed into her ear, preying on her small chant, "Quit that. How do you expect to be any good to anyone if you can't keep from harming yourself. You are worthless if you keep doing that."
 
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