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Revenge and grudges?

Sydian

fake your death.
  • 33,327
    Posts
    17
    Years
    I don't understand how some people can hold onto that stuff, especially if it was way over a year ago. My friend just texted me and I...assume they were talking about my ex? "I saw that fuzzy thing at the mall, want me to cut'em?" Um...no? Me and "that fuzzy thing" haven't seen each other in person for almost over a year. I don't care about that anymore.

    Not to mention said friend is constantly talking about hating someone who stole her boyfriend MANY years ago. Um. If you're so in love with who you're with now, why does it even matter anymore? I understand still thinking it was a cheap move to pull, but why do you still need to bash her face in? Is it even necessary if you have someone better? I mean, I'm sorry if you're one of those people holding a grudge on someone, but if you know this girl like I do...you're just annoyed hearing about it. I worked out my problems with my "fuzzy" ex.

    Sure, it took almost a year for them to apologize, but even still, we've looked past it and can talk like normal people. Hell, I just broke up with someone after a year and almost two months last night and we're doing perfectly fine. I understand not all relationships can end nicely like that, but if you're five years down the road and in a secure relationship with someone you love, does it matter that some hooker stole your 9th grade boyfriend? And even worse, do you have to hate EVERY GIRL that even talked to someone you were dating? I'm sorry, this is just something that's bugged me about her for a long time. Just get over it.

    Well, that's my rant for today. Discuss.
     
    Some people are immature.. like that whole hooker thing.. but other times you can really understand why people might hold a long grudge.. like if it was to someone who really affected -you- badly and did it specifically to -you-.. and then when you tried to get past it and become friends again.. they continuously act in a douchey-prick way that they did back then.. and then it's just like.. "No. I don't forgive you for what you did because you never learned from it, nor did you say sorry." Soo... yeah.
     
    Is that a puppy in a pea pod? :> Anyway, I see what you're saying, but even if the relationship had a crappy ending, if you're with someone that loves you and you love them, what does your ex from 4 or 5 years ago matter? Unless you're still in love with them, then I just don't get it.
     
    To be honest, I can hold a grudge a while but only if no one speaks for the offender or if the offender simply doesn't ever apologize or try to clear up the misunderstanding. Even in those cases, I never hold grudges for longer than a year, except in cases where I've been extremely wronged, walked all over repeatedly and no remorse or worse, false remorse to lure me into another hit. But even in extreme cases, the grudges still only have like 3 years max to live. Hating someone for any longer than that is so painful to me it's impossible.

    So yeah, I don't really understand grudges like that, but I do know that sometimes misunderstandings can breed serious grudges that make people unwilling to listen to reason. *shrug* In that case, you just step away from that person and let 'em alone, you can't please everyone ya know.
     
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