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Lucid
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now thats a boy with pride for his country XD
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Because I'm just that bored....
50 Things to do at Wal-Mart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them
and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals
throughout the day.
4. Don't bother doing your own shopping. Simply find someone with a full trolley containing roughly the items you need, and when they are not looking take it and go pay for it at the checkout. (this is not stealing, they did not own the items yet, they were simply 'moving them around')
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the
spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit, then arrange them into erotic poses. (be creative with the gift-wrap tubes used in point 6).
9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly,
especially in thin aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I
think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.
11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off
and turn the volume up to full blast.
12. Re-enact a fatal incident involving the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen
you in so long." etc. See if they play along. Insist on calling them 'Bob', and if they protest, get angry about it (violent if necissary).
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself
loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"
15. When you leave the store, try your car keys in the door of every car in the car park until you get to your own. Then drive off as if this is perfectly normal. (Note- if you don't actually own a car and walked to the store, attempt the above by substituting car keys with your house keys).
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are
taking it for a test drive.
17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet
behind them. Do this until they leave the store.
18. Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. For added fun: See how many cashiers you can glue to each-other before any of them notice.
19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customers items. If the cashier protests, kill them.
20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and
when they say you didn't buy it there say "The customer is always right dammit!!" Make a scene.
21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you
will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other
aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,
"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."
26. Climb things.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"
upside down. Once you have mastered this, progress to "boobs".
29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and
say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between
them yelling "Red Rover."
31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any
in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples). Do a vague hand-mime of what a 'Shnerple' looks like to assist them.
32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale
battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.
33. Take bets on the battle from above.
34. Test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics on all the live animals in Pet-Care.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask
the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as
possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from
Mission Impossible.
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags against their will.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to
your Twinkies."
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: Marco Polo.
43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet
section, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's using an alternative alphabet of your choosing.
45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with
various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at
something, quickly place random combinations of items in their cart, such as 'A Large Cucumber and a Tub of Vasceline'.
47. Relax in the patio furniture drinking beer until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to
your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."
49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to
the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out
much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
50 Things to do at Wal-Mart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them
and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals
throughout the day.
4. Don't bother doing your own shopping. Simply find someone with a full trolley containing roughly the items you need, and when they are not looking take it and go pay for it at the checkout. (this is not stealing, they did not own the items yet, they were simply 'moving them around')
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the
spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit, then arrange them into erotic poses. (be creative with the gift-wrap tubes used in point 6).
9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly,
especially in thin aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I
think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.
11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off
and turn the volume up to full blast.
12. Re-enact a fatal incident involving the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen
you in so long." etc. See if they play along. Insist on calling them 'Bob', and if they protest, get angry about it (violent if necissary).
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself
loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"
15. When you leave the store, try your car keys in the door of every car in the car park until you get to your own. Then drive off as if this is perfectly normal. (Note- if you don't actually own a car and walked to the store, attempt the above by substituting car keys with your house keys).
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are
taking it for a test drive.
17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet
behind them. Do this until they leave the store.
18. Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. For added fun: See how many cashiers you can glue to each-other before any of them notice.
19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customers items. If the cashier protests, kill them.
20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and
when they say you didn't buy it there say "The customer is always right dammit!!" Make a scene.
21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you
will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other
aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,
"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."
26. Climb things.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"
upside down. Once you have mastered this, progress to "boobs".
29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and
say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between
them yelling "Red Rover."
31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any
in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples). Do a vague hand-mime of what a 'Shnerple' looks like to assist them.
32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale
battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.
33. Take bets on the battle from above.
34. Test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics on all the live animals in Pet-Care.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask
the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as
possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from
Mission Impossible.
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags against their will.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to
your Twinkies."
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: Marco Polo.
43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet
section, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's using an alternative alphabet of your choosing.
45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with
various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at
something, quickly place random combinations of items in their cart, such as 'A Large Cucumber and a Tub of Vasceline'.
47. Relax in the patio furniture drinking beer until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to
your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."
49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to
the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out
much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
Lucid
Guest
- 0
- Posts
lets see... done 1, 3, 7, 14, 21, 29, 36, and 42 with cell phones XD
- 30,906
- Posts
- 21
- Years
- Seen Jun 17, 2024
I'm going to sleep now but before I go...
Here are some children's books that will NEVER be written:
10: You're Different and That's Not Good
9: The Boy Who Died After Eating All His Vegetables
8: The Childrens' Guide to Hitch-Hiking
7: Jane Was So Naughty That Her Mummy Stopped Loving Her
6: Curious Colin and the High-Voltage Electric Fence
5: Yummy Sweeties - A Guide to Strangers and Their Sweets
4: Things Which Rich People Have, and You Will Never Have
3: See the Cat Lying, See the Cat Flying
2: Whining, Kicking and Crying - 20 Easy Ways to Get What You Want
1: "Ploff!" said the Hamster and 100 Other Fun Microwave Games
list of fun things to do at a funeral.
Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased.
Tell the undertaker that he can't close the coffin until you find your contact lens.
Punch the body and tell people he hit you first.
Tell the widow that you're the deceased's illegitimate son.
Ask someone to take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the deceased.
At the cemetery, play taps on a kazoo.
Walk around telling people that you've seen the will and they are not in it.
Start licking the widow's face. Apologise. Then do it again.
Drive behind the widow's limo and keep honking your horn.
Tell the undertaker that your dog just died and ask if he can sneak him into the coffin.
Put a hard-boiled egg in the mouth of the deceased.
Slip a whoopee cushion under the widow.
Leave some phony dog poo on the deceased's forehead.
Tell the widow that you have to leave early and ask if the will can be read before the funeral is over.
Urge the widow to give the deceased's wooden leg to someone poor who can't afford firewood.
Walk around telling people that the deceased didn't like them.
Use the deceased's tongue to lick a stamp.
Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you.
Take up a collection to pay off the deceased's gambling debts.
Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on.
Put super-glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss.
Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit.
If the widow cries, blow a trumpet every time she wipes her nose. But don't be discreet; make sure everyone can clearly see the trumpet.
When no one is looking, slip plastic vampire teeth into the deceased's mouth.
Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint.
At the cemetery take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose.
Push the widow as she bends over to throw dirt on the coffin.
Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried.
Tell everyone you're from the IRS and you're confiscating the coffin for back-taxes.
Tell the widow that the deceased's last wish was that she marry you.
Night XD
Here are some children's books that will NEVER be written:
10: You're Different and That's Not Good
9: The Boy Who Died After Eating All His Vegetables
8: The Childrens' Guide to Hitch-Hiking
7: Jane Was So Naughty That Her Mummy Stopped Loving Her
6: Curious Colin and the High-Voltage Electric Fence
5: Yummy Sweeties - A Guide to Strangers and Their Sweets
4: Things Which Rich People Have, and You Will Never Have
3: See the Cat Lying, See the Cat Flying
2: Whining, Kicking and Crying - 20 Easy Ways to Get What You Want
1: "Ploff!" said the Hamster and 100 Other Fun Microwave Games
list of fun things to do at a funeral.
Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased.
Tell the undertaker that he can't close the coffin until you find your contact lens.
Punch the body and tell people he hit you first.
Tell the widow that you're the deceased's illegitimate son.
Ask someone to take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the deceased.
At the cemetery, play taps on a kazoo.
Walk around telling people that you've seen the will and they are not in it.
Start licking the widow's face. Apologise. Then do it again.
Drive behind the widow's limo and keep honking your horn.
Tell the undertaker that your dog just died and ask if he can sneak him into the coffin.
Put a hard-boiled egg in the mouth of the deceased.
Slip a whoopee cushion under the widow.
Leave some phony dog poo on the deceased's forehead.
Tell the widow that you have to leave early and ask if the will can be read before the funeral is over.
Urge the widow to give the deceased's wooden leg to someone poor who can't afford firewood.
Walk around telling people that the deceased didn't like them.
Use the deceased's tongue to lick a stamp.
Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you.
Take up a collection to pay off the deceased's gambling debts.
Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on.
Put super-glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss.
Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit.
If the widow cries, blow a trumpet every time she wipes her nose. But don't be discreet; make sure everyone can clearly see the trumpet.
When no one is looking, slip plastic vampire teeth into the deceased's mouth.
Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint.
At the cemetery take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose.
Push the widow as she bends over to throw dirt on the coffin.
Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried.
Tell everyone you're from the IRS and you're confiscating the coffin for back-taxes.
Tell the widow that the deceased's last wish was that she marry you.
Night XD
Last edited:
Lust
Ubersexual
- 7,652
- Posts
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- Years
- Age 35
- In your most desired fantasies.
- Seen Feb 21, 2015
xD. Those are great! Have a good one, Jorge.
BulbasaurTrainer
im back
- 1,018
- Posts
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- Years
- Age 33
- ?????
- Seen May 22, 2009
hello is anybody here hello >>;
Lust
Ubersexual
- 7,652
- Posts
- 20
- Years
- Age 35
- In your most desired fantasies.
- Seen Feb 21, 2015
I'm here. What's up BT?
BulbasaurTrainer
im back
- 1,018
- Posts
- 20
- Years
- Age 33
- ?????
- Seen May 22, 2009
Nothing much here just wanted to say hi and you how have you been
Lust
Ubersexual
- 7,652
- Posts
- 20
- Years
- Age 35
- In your most desired fantasies.
- Seen Feb 21, 2015
I've been pretty good, but I have to go now. I'll talk to you later!
BulbasaurTrainer
im back
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- Posts
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- Years
- Age 33
- ?????
- Seen May 22, 2009
Me too I need to go thanks for reminding me bye have good night and a good sleepLegendary Pok?mon Master said:
Shadow da Hedgehog
Shadow is here!!!!!
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- Seen Aug 12, 2006
BulbasaurTrainer said:
ok, cya then, nighty! any1 here now?
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