That sounds bad... But as much personal as that might be, you can always tell someone like a close friend if you want. They might provide some sort of comfort.
I'm not gonna show enthusiasm in wanting to help you, because people end up thinking of me as very annoying if I even want to hear of their bad situations in life, lol.
But yeah, forget that all. The job is truly your first and most urgent step. You can always live for your own self if the worst comes to the worst.