Bofvar sat in his seat, his feet still propped on the table as he watched his comrades jump into action. What a fine mess they had gotten themselves into. Quite the bit of fun. Maybe it was the Lion’s roar, but he hadn’t thrown himself into the fray as quickly as he might normally have done. His friends seemed to be doing an admirable job without him, getting into a few scrapes but wiggling a way out of them just as soon. As foggy as his head was, he slowly brought himself to his feet and chugged the last of whatever the maid had brought him moments before the fight. The almost briny liquid went down with a bitter aftertaste, just like the evening was. A body came flying through the air, knocking into him from behind. The stocky Dwarf stumbled, but his low center of gravity saved him from taking a face-plant into the wooden floor below.
“Alright you spoony bards!” He turned around and threw his stein at the face of the man who bumped him, the toss catching him square between the eyes and felling the vagrant in one blow. “Come at me, but save the spirits! They’ve done nothing to ya!” Without realizing it, his invitation was more well received than he had anticipated. Apparently, a few of the patrons had just been waiting for an opportunity to throw a few punches his way. Not that he could blame them. His wit and abrasive charm was part of wait made him, him. One of the men’s fists connected with his hardy, well formed jaw. A crack erupted from both his face and the man’s hand, sending both reeling. Bofvar quickly brought his own hand up and popped the dislocated joint back into place, the pop satisfying and the pain dulled by liquor. “Like a face of marble chiseled by the gods,” he called after his attacker, spitting out some blood as he did so.
The other man shifted his feet, a small knife appeared in his hands from some unknown source. Undeterred by his mate, who was currently nursing his hand, his evenings of self pleasure obviously out of commission for a while, the other lunged and went for quick horizontal slashes slashes at the arm. Bofvar’s height at once gave him an advantage as he ducked under the attack, his body plowing forward and tackling the taller man against the wall. The impact of the blow loosened his assailant’s grip on the small blade as it tumbled harmlessly away. “Oi, bringing a knife to a bar fight. Your mother raised you wrong, boy!” With an effort of great strength, he lifted the man and flipped him end over end, before slamming his head against the ground. Two down, the whole rest of the bar to go.
Nimbly ducking in-between the blows and people lining the floor, he tried his best to make it out the door, where it seemed the others might be trying their best to go. Almost to the exit, a woman crossed his path and hit him right in the arm. He was taken aback, not by the blow, but by who threw it. She couldn’t have been more than an inch taller than him. He had fell men almost twice her size. Throwing up his arms, he backed away, a wry smile crossing his lips. “Little lady, I don’t want to fight you.”
“Good!” The girl shouted and brought one of her legs up right between his own. A nearby table was the only thing that saved him from collapsing entirely, his eyes filling at once with stars and then with darkness, before slowly regaining his composure. The woman didn’t let up, however. She pounced on his back, her hands flying against his head and reaching around to yank his beard. The long growth of hair securely wrapped in her hands, she pulled on it like a yoke and reared back. He stumbled out into the alley, darkness embracing the two as he did. The only light coming from whatever artificial sources were nearby. Throwing his back against the alley wall, he kept it up until the woman fell off and slumped down, her breathing come in hurried and shallow.
“Now,” he wheezed, his testies still sore from the prior blow, as he leaned down to look her in the eyes. Brushing the auburn hair from her face, he tried his best to get a better look. “You’re fortunate,” he whispered to her and saw her eyes look up at him as he spoke. “Most men would have made you pay dearly for that.” He drew closer, his face directly in front of hers. “I’m just going to let you off with a warning.” The girl smiled, her face trying its best to look as innocent as possible before she reared back and headbutt him, blood starting to drip down her face. As he stumbled back again, she scrambled to her feet and took off down the alley, disappearing into the night.
“Wait!” He shouted after her, his hand running to his head almost in disbelief. It was too late, she was gone, probably never to be seen again. “I like that in a lass...”