1,000 Ways to get Kicked Out of Walmart [v.2]

397: Play cart bowling, see how many people you can knock down from a distance with a cart loaded with the heaviest items in the store. Bonus points if you get an employee.
 
Here's something spooky...

398

If the 13th of a month falls on a Friday, paint a 13 on a large sign and say everything is only $13. But it comes at a cost, everyone needs to have a tattoo on their neck, carry a gun or bleach their hair to get the discount.

(Guess where I got the idea from)
 
399. Yell, "Spongebob put me in a box for three months, trying to give me a make-over, and wouldn't let me have some chicken which he said I devoured within minutes upon opening the container!" and rip up as many boxes as you can find...say..."I'm looking for eggs! It's EASTER..." and have it be Christmas when you do it....idk...
 
402. Make it look like you're eating cat food, saying it's a delicacy. "THIS FOOD=MINE. BACK OFF. NOW." Making oming and noming nosies. Then, step on it after you spit it up, because you're definitely not going to like the taste of it, especially if you don't like seafood. Make-out with the floor, and compliment its kissing technique.
 
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404. Lick one's poodle saying, "mmm...These are good pooding pops." Sound like a guy named Bill. Do it in the dog food section. (Don't actually do it, just make it look like you are... and say, "finger lickin' good.")
 
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406 . Sing naughty words to little kids
 
407. Pass gas, or in your case, float an air biscuit, if you're from the land of tea and crumpets, and say, "ah...sir, do you enjoy this stench?" Watch them look at you in disgust. Say this seriously, too, because it's funnier if you're serious about it.
 
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409. Go into the store with a bunch of friends with homemade Twilight shirts saying which Team you're on, but you and your worst rival, who's pretending to be your BFF for the day, even though you two hate each other. If no one's on your team, draw on the face of those who don't like you. You can let your clan wear vampire fangs, and have the others sport hair extensions. Have a sword fight with a light-saber, and say, TWILIGHT/STAR WARS CROSSOVER BIOTCH! It helps if you and your worst rival are named Edward and Jacob.
 
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411. Claim you hear voices when someone announces a sale on the intercom, or asks someone to come. Act really obnoxious and annoying when you do it. On a megaphone, say, "SHUT UP! (use vulgarity too.) "YOU ARE SOOOOO LOUD_AH!"
 
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413. Edit. Walk up to people, individually, telling them, "HEY, you like just like (insert someone here)," watch them get infuriated.
Orig.
"Tell everyone they remind you of someone who looks nothing like them and watch them get angry, while you flee on your mobile device" ...like a scooter.

The number's right, but there's two 411's.... Why is that? O.o <talking to self.... OOOH...I'm such a weirdy! I talk to myself....I guess that's why I'm So INTA-RES-TING!
 
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