Love Is Gone
Dawn brought emptiness and confusion?
And I don?t know why?am I in delusion?
The light is now nowhere to be seen.
The last sentence seems to hinder the rhythm a bit. Also, the refference to "dawn" and light disappearing might make the stanza a bit contradictory. Maybe you're specifying that even though light has come, heart break has made you blind, or maybe you could change dawn to dusk... I'm not sure... but whatever you want to convey in the poem ;)
Because your bright green eyes no longer hypnotize me,
I am lost in the dark.
Maybe you should reorder the sequence of the stanza a bit? The long sentence is a bit shaky form of syntax. But I'm not really sure. You could be trying to convey the quick and sudden darkness that has overcome you the moment you realize that you can't seem to fall in love with this boy again
Left alone, with an empty heart.
Love has gone another path,
Is it gone forever? Will it come back?
Everything is grey, drenched by rain?
Just return love, and stop the pain.
October skies are getting old,
Everything seems so dark and cold?
I find these lines to be quite good. October, to me, is the beginning of autumn. Autumn, to me is a romantic month rather than February. The way you say how October skies, the romantic skies of fall, and how hackneyed they are now, show pretty much how you gotten sick of love and how love is making you feel terribly. I just love the line.
And the light is gone?
Rain has been falling far too long.
My heart is crying,
Severed and dying.
Tomorrow will never come again,
Rage and hate will come instead.
On top of it all, I stand and watch,
Now wondering about those bright green eyes,
Green eyes by which I was once mesmerized?
It sounded pretty awkward on your repition in this line. Well, to me that is. It might depend on every person but repition should be used carefully. Very carefully.
And I want to fall into them, once again,
And I don?t want the light to leave, ever again...
