[Gen 4] Aron the World -- Episode 3: Sinnoh Slam Jam -- Platinum

[SteCisGreendog]

Hi there, I'm SteC and this is:

The Basics
This is the third of my ongoing task to defeat all Pokémon in existence with Aron. Now I am moving onto the fourth generation with the Platinum version as the starting point as it benefits from an extended Pokédex over Diamond and Pearl. The task is to clear up the regional Pokédex as much as possible before moving on to the next game. The following rules still stand from my last run on FireRed:

• catching and breeding another Aron for party use is fine, only if the hatched Aron can evolve and the original starter remains unevolved. Victories with Lairon/Aggron do not count
• completing the Pokémon League and beating the last legendary is the minimum requirement. Ideally the regional Pokédex must be beaten before the next region can be explored
• try to keep the 'caught Pokédex' count as low as possible until the Elite Four/Champion are beaten and post-game modes unlock
• other party Pokémon may be raised for the sake of competing in Double Battles, but not essential
• forget what I said about 'eras' and 'parts' and 'episodes' - the current format is fine as it is!

Path to Domination
The regions I intend to play in order.

Hoenn --> Kanto --> Sinnoh --> Johto --> Unova --> Kalos --> Alola --> Galar --> Paldea

The Rules
Detailed explanation of my playthrough in the spoiler box.

Spoiler:

1. Solo run as Aron - hacked in the game as a starter or traded - and use only that Pokémon without evolving it to defeat every type of Pokémon in the region's Pokédex at least once during a wild battle and/or trainer battle.

2. This challenge has several requirements that grow in scale of difficulty:

Req. 1 - use Aron to defeat every Pokémon in encounters at least once, including version exclusives, legendaries and mythicals. You MUST make the effort to track defeated Pokémon within that Generation
Example: rival's starter, legendary guardians, Giratina and Pokémon found only in Diamond and Pearl via battling


Req. 2 - Regional rules; use Aron to defeat all the Pokémon in the chosen region's Pokédex
Example: 210 Pokémon in the expanded Sinnoh Pokedex (play Diamond AND Pearl to see everything that the versions offer)


Req. 3 - National rules; use Aron to defeat all the Pokémon up to the specific Generation across multiple versions
Example 1: 493 Pokémon up to Gen 4 (play Platinum AND HeartGold OR SoulSilver)
Example 2: 721 Pokémon up to Gen 6 (play any of the older versions including X AND Y)​

3. The challenge is completed when any of these requirements are met. Move on to the next Generation. This will be made up in several 'era' below with eligible games where Aron is featured:

Era 1. Gen III Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald, FireRed, LeafGreen
Era 2. Gen IV Diamond, Pearl, Platinum, HeartGold, SoulSilver
Era 3. Gen V Black, White, Black 2, White 2
Era 4. Gen VI X, Y, OmegaRuby, AlphaSapphire
Era 5. Gen VII Sun, Moon, UltraSun, UltraMoon
Era 6. Gen VIII Sword, Shield, BrilliantDiamond, ShiningPearl inc. expansions
Era 7. Gen IX n/a (Aron is not available... yet)
Era 8. Gen I/II ???

​

4. Pokémon defeated from a previous Generation may not be carried over to each Era, but you may start from any Generation as long as you track your progress somehow. This is useful if you are starting this challenge for the first time, or only want to meet Requirement 2 for a specific region in mind (ie. Kalos, Galar).

5. Other Pokémon can only be caught for using specific TMs and HMs required to progress through the game. As for shiny Pokémon, you may catch them to keep as 'trophies' but no other purpose. Keep your Pokédex 'caught' rate as low as possible until the post-game criteria allows you to keep many Pokémon (ie. battle and contest facilities)

Example: Aron can use Cut, but not Fly. Catch a Scyther that can learn Fly and Cut to save space for Aron's moveset.​

6. If your party has more than one Pokémon (see Rule 5.) then try to use Aron in every single battle. It must lead your party at all times. If Aron faints in a wild encounter, you must Run to end the battle and revive it. If Aron faints in a trainer or gym battle, switch to another party Pokémon and revive. Resets may be tracked. Be sure to save often.

7. Aron must NOT evolve. Cancel the evolution all the time until you give it the Everstone to hold. If Aron becomes Lairon, the challenge will fail. You MAY evolve your Aron when Requirements 1 and 2 are met (deemed as 'retired') and you are ready to move on to a new version. However, should you require an Aggron for your team, you may breed an Aron for an egg to hatch and raise; the original Aron must remain in its base evolution ragardless.

8. When starting over a new version or file, Aron should be a new Pokémon, appropriately low levelled as to keep game balance and remove the hassle of file transferring.
Example: hatching an Aron in Ruby/Sword and raising it to level 5 before trading to Sapphire/Shield is perfectly acceptable.

9. For games where Aron cannot be easily hacked as a starter (Parts 5 onwards...) you should try to get an Aron at the earliest possible chance, either by conventional trading (see Rule 8) or hacking so it becomes a wild Pokémon on Route 1. Start the challenge when it joins your party and move your original starter to a PC or release it.

10. This challenge may be stacked with another Pokémon challenge (ie. Nuzlocke, item restrictions, etc.) for extra difficulty and maybe a more memorable experience.

Notes
This is where I say my piece on how I felt about the Fourth Generation back in the day when it was fresh as daisies. I vividly remember that this was the game that got me back into the series after some distractions with Sony's machine for a few years prior to 2009. It was more akin to a chance encounter when a friend and I were visiting a GAME store on a day out and I happened to see Platinum being heavily promoted, which prompted me to bring home a booklet detailing all its key features. As I studied it, a horrifying thought came to me: "wow, so much new stuff has been added since I last played Silver. Not just new Pokémon, but all these strange mechanics. What if it's too much for me?!" Seeing as the Nintendo DS was capable of improving and enhancing the Pokémon formula and then some, I really was worried that I'd put it down due to the saturated content. Well that was bullcrap because, 1) I picked up the Pearl version and went through it just fine despite the slow as hell battle interface, and 2) I should be more afraid of playing Minecraft again which is brimming with new content to the point of over-saturation. I wouldn't know where to start with MC. So I did beat Pearl to dip my toes back into Pokémon and then acquired Platinum later down the line to experiment with my Action Replay but went no further than that.

So, all you smug Sinnoh freaks can thank me later because I have you to thank for luring me back to the series. I never dared to leave Pokémon again ever since. I mean, *scoff* the Sinnoh lineup really look full of themselves, don't they? The old guard getting new forms, the Eevee Revolution kicking off with its new forms, the multiplied mess of Legendaries coming to the fold, that stupid sand shark and its stuck up Champion. I can't wait to wipe the floor with that penguin and flaming butt monkey for baiting me back in. And speaking of which, can you believe that I actually detested Lucario at first for being a shameless example of furbait? That's all water under the bridge now because the movie it starred in won me over.

Well... I changed that tune quickly, didn't I?

In closing, I've been eager to get back on the Solo Challenge ever since FireRed was done, I feel I have to celebrate the occassion by documenting every single sweep with 'Mr. 304.' It's a celebration, that's all it is. Now how will the format be different this time? As far as I know, it is still the playthrough with commentary... just go with the flow. Yeah, that's it.

First part of Platinum is... kicking off this weekend!​

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 1 - A Frosty Beginning

Let's start off with the introductory cutscene. I was really not that impressed with it for years - it's more like a tech demo than anything just to show that the psuedo 3D effect can be pulled off in the Pokéverse, and there is some remnants of a story in there somwhere. That's all I wanted to say about that. As always, open the spoiler tag below to read what I've been up to in the first hour or so.

Spoiler:

Yep, gotta go with the female trainer, because nothing says 'crazy' than not wearing warm pants in the frigid Sinnoh climate and this is a crazy solo challenge that only crazy people can attempt. But don't confuse 'crazy' with 'determined' just yet. She is called 'Aron' for lack of a fitting name.
The rival was going to be called 'Sugarkid' named after my video game pro-wrestling persona but character space wouldn't allow it, so 'Vector' it was, taking after my best friend's nickname. As for him... *rubs hands* oh, ho ho ho, I am going to enjoy riffing him apart in this journey.

And *bang* they're off! Not one tilespace later than my rival stormed in my room like an overexcited dog that missed its master before I could do anything. Must go and see the Professor somewhere.

Must... not... bump... the walls...

Yes, we know. I know.

I said, we get it, caffeine claimed him a few years early but that's no reason to state the obv-

Thank you, Professor. Rowan 'not Atkinson' mused his way into Route 201. Oak, Elm and Birch have their own ways of gifting the player their own Pokémon. Now it's his turn, and what a doozy it turned out to be.

First, the Law. The Law in Sinnoh states that 'yes' means yes and 'no' means the opposite of no. See for yourselves.

What joke? We were just talking about your erratic behaviour tonight. It's nightfall as you can see as I ran this on an emulator in the middle of the day. Later I switched to the real time settings that has yet to confirm anything as of typing.

Here's the Prof's lackey in a not so 'meet cute' moment bringing up the briefcase. Now to make my all important choice in life. Choosing from Franklin, Curious George, or Pingu. But don't be silly, that's not their names on the marquee, people, because it's:

...the strangest looking armour-clad Pokémon I've ever seen. It's mine!

Naturally, I tried to wuss out, and the natural response was:

The rival chose Piplup. I hope I made the right choice 'cause I wanna teach that smug penguin or lesson for playing with the top brass in this entire series.

Oh yeah. The stupid gimmick from the DS series where the trainer interjects themselves in mid-fight spouting nonsense. This ain't about you, chief.

"You are an embarassment to all blue penguins everywhere - and penguins aren't blue!!"

Shots were fired.

Now to play out this whole sequence 30 more times to get the Aron of the exact gender/nature I wanted.

Hmmmmm, Brave wasn't my first choice but a close second. Perfect ability, too. Also has to be a female, so... *shhhh, wink*

A little bed and breakfast at home later we happened to be right near the end of the game to nab a Legendary. I swear, this kid is off the hook.

The mystery man talked to his reflection and then Vec practiced his sarcasm on me. No Poké Balls meant no visit to the Lab in Sandgem Town.

"No pants, what was I thinking?!"

These words will haunt me for the remainder of my quest, like so many before and after. Hey, wild Pokémon!

"Big goofs can go no further."

"Now you've shut up, you can be my new drinking bird."

Here is the 'meet cute' moment we've been waiting for, in Sandgem Town! Can it top the romantic tension last seen in Hoenn?

NAAAAAAW! Of course not! More shade has been thrown at Veccy boy. It's not been an hour of standard gameplay yet and his future already has 'village idiot' written all over it.

No idea how to make a joke of that one, honestly.

Pokémon were allowed more character spaces for naming apparently. What gives? Now Aron can have my rasslin' persona. Wear it with pride.

Refuse, and get the Pokédex anyway. Gosh, so full of 'yes' men in Sinnoh. I'm not sure if I'll ever get used to this strange new world. Back outside...

NO NEED TO SHOUT RIGHT BEHIND ME! I'm a delicate young lady!

Sad, isn't it? Hope it's not contagious.

Scooted back home in Twinleaf to receive the Journal for some reason and a Parcel to send to Prof. Espresso.

Come to think of it, we both share the same raven-hued hair, even that unseen deadbeat father. So does Cheren from Gen 5, the strength obsessed cakehole that made me hate any notions of 'strong' in the series. Let's move on to Jubilife City.

.
.
.

Crikey! What the heck happened here? What happened, I say!

.
.
.

I was in a state of panic so I couldn't give any screenshots of the battle that took down my solo. Well, except this one. Tell me what you think happened to Sugarkid in this battle.

That's right - the wild Kricketot's Bide passed through my typing resistences and fired at my Steel/Rock girl at full blast.

Wow. Lost to a Kricketot, though. I feel humbled.

The SOB owes me 43 Poke dollars.

That fn' Kricketot.

Seeing as it was so early on, there was no point in resetting and instead headed straight to Jubilife on a shopping spree. Those Paralyz Heals were and still are my prized possessions in my bag. I hope I don't run into any nasty Electric types too soon...

And this was where the writing goes to shit, folks. Any notion to getting 'strong' is just gonna get censored. I can only put up with so much hack dialogue made with no effort, thanks to the aforementioned Cheren for planting that evil seed in my brain in 2011.

Route 219? Nothing there.

Another reason why I chose the female protagonist. Anybody who holds their Poké Ball with both hands like a camera is a cheesy twerp! I always hated that!

But... I just bought some! *fumes*

"Something, something, xylophone. Now go away."

WATCH YOUR F*^(&^)£' LANGUAGE, KID!

Seeing all these shorts and skirts running around this region makes me feel like a weakling because I cannot stand cold temperatures in real life- wait, hang on. The female trainer class holds their Poké Ball with both hands, too?! Shut my mouth and lock me away. Forget wait I said about being a cheesy twerp. That's no way to hold a Poké Ball, everyone.

"Tezuka Osama-san's lawyers will see you now."

"Hey, I just beaten a turd with bits of crap stuck on. Story of my life."

Another town, another cutscene as we arrived in Jubilife to have my hand held like a token girlfriend when this gent came by:

'Looker?' As in, it rhymes with f----- (hey now!)

That was amazing. They even snuck a 'YO MOMMA' joke in there. I can't help seeing past the sincerity in his tone of voice. I think he'd sound like a cross between Sean Connery and Humphrey Bogart. He'd sound wonderful!

By 'obtained' he meant 'stole,' right? See, I'm getting used to the Sinnoh Laws of contradiction!

Well look at that. Reading the blackboard keeps Veccy occupied for at least 10 minutes. Who knew? Had to get hold of that Town Map anyways.

Only true dandies get ahead in life. That's the good ol' Sinnoh way. Hisui must have worked out fine, then.

Hey! Ever heard of personal boundaries?!

Cutting to the chase here, but the Pokétch was this gen's big thing made to give the bottom screen something to do, which was why I cropped it off to view the top half until the feature was unlocked. If I hadn't have done that, this log would be an eyesore and people won't want to read. Wanna know something else?

Simple Photoshop magic made the screens go from left to right. I like it!

Word. Honestly, I never played this far in Platinum to find out what that was about.

A Paralyz Heal and it's free. Count your blessings!

The Quick Claw. Ah, it's strange because it always saved my party in the old Game Boy Color days, but since I started over on emulation, it doesn't work anymore! Very surprised to get this early on. Will it be more reliable this time?

Time to wrap up Chapter 1!




Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 6
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 0
Badges - 0
Technical errors - 0
Strong-a-grams - 9

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Believe me when I say writing up the first chapter on a DS system was much, much longer than it had to be. That's what I have to be prepared for now that advances in hardware and technology can slow down overall progress (just when I was getting familiar with the GBA titles...). I will just have to take things slow and like I said before, go with the flow in selecting my words and screenshots. So glad to be using the Action commands in Photoshop to save time in the post-edit.

Don't get too mad at the jokes up there otherwise you'll encourage me! :>

 

[Ben Resolute]

Following - I'm assuming some FEAR shenanigans are going to be afoot and I'm here for it

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Following - I'm assuming some FEAR shenanigans are going to be afoot and I'm here for it

Hi there,
I like your way of thinking but having not tried the FEAR strategy before, I can't make any guarantee that I'll stoop so low to use it. :) otoh, the Sinnoh Pokémon are tricky customers indeed. I'll just have to give it my all.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 2 - Plant the Town Red, Emerald, and Platinum

The date's wrong but never mind that. The journal was thankfully kept to one screen unlike the Kanto remake's Batman recap. Hot off the heels of exploring Jubilife City was the route towards our next destination, Oreburgh Town, and - look, somebody's playing 'pika boo' on one side of the screen there. Could it be?

Spoiler:

The rival, hooked on energy drinks, was determined to beat to me to the Red Bull punch. Not without a quick battle which I thought I was a little unprepared for. I suspected the level balancing in the early game was tweaked compared to Emerald/FireRed. Mud Slap was decent for what it was.

KERR-ASH!

Bit of a gutsy decision to announce your team before a battle. Here's everyone's favourite cavern filler, Zubat and a million of its friends.

"Guess you didn't *see* that coming, eh?"

Machop, and - er... darn.

Machop apparently learned Low Kick at a much earlier stage than its Kanto cousins. Still no other Pokémon in my party, so I lost a little chump change and avoided that lucky trainer until Sugarkid was beefed up.

"One step closer to banning pollen season."

"You're easier to beat in battle than in the wild, you stealth nut."

"Say, here's a question: what color is an orange? Oh, don't strain yourself."

"Betcha can't throw yourself over that chasm."

We've seen the latter three already. I don't need to pad out this log with familiar faces. You can see the new ones, though.

"You've hit below the belt one time too many, chucklehead!"

Except this one. I got my revenge, didn't I?

The Oreburgh Gate (I think it was), where I just happened to be at the right place at the right time with a sucky watch, so an HM was given to me out of pity. That's my take on it, anyway. Ooh, Rock Smash? Holy cow. Now would be the right time to make some friends. *wink*

Meet Phobolina and Deimodonna! I have a theory; inside every Bidoof is a force of indestructible power waiting to be unleashed. Laugh now while you still can.

Here in Oreburgh Town I got the usual treatment of becoming the trophy tart by the welcoming party of one, and had to hold hands with-

He had to spoil my fun.

Yes... yes, he is.

Oh yeah. She gets it.

A cowgirl? See, I... no, I'm holding my tongue until I'm ready to say it.

There was a little business to do in Oreburgh Mine before the first gym can be accessed. In fact it was so easy I won't waste my breath.

No it ain't.

"I like you. Ever considered a career in real estate for stray Aron?"

What's with the goofy camera angle in this gym? Anyhow, I felt I saw this before. The first Sinnoh gym was a Rock type like in Kanto and Hoenn, and you thought the Fire/Fighting starter typing was redundant?! I put my money on the table that Roark used Geodude and Onix and, surprise, I was right. But wait! Here comes a new challenger!

*rolls eyes* Is the sun hot?

"That's what using your noodle gets you, chump."

With that logic, aren't every Gym Leader in the series a bunch of glorified jobbers, though? Handing out badges like they're candy?

Yeah, I saved and called it a day there. However, I had the urge to give more and resumed until my sheet of notes were completely full. I'll show you them sometime.

Leaving Oreburgh with my gym badge actually got me a step ahead of Vec for once. You know, I wanted to mod this file further just to remove that goddamn 'bump' sound effect that plagued the series for a good while up til gen 8. Nothing against the visually impaired at all, but that noise.. it's just annoying. Hence why I only turn the sound on for the first few minutes in a new location and then shut it off for the duration of gameplay.

Follow that scent! It was probably green Monster soda this time.

Using Rock Smash in the Gate got me progressively far, but not progressive enough. I needed a Bicycle. What a waste of time.

"Vampires suck. Bats suck. You suck!"

Look, line, and sinker.

Back in Jubilife, there's a commotion up north. I teamed up with Red Beret (that's my new name for Lucas) and got introduced to Team Galaxy Quest.

Gee, that's some stereotypically evil Pokémon right here. Somehow I don't see Glameow taking the villain's side. It's no Meowth, and with a tail like that, no Marsupilami either.

"What you need, my string beaned friend, is a sandwich - a knuckle sandwich!"

"Stick a cork in it. You're done."

No, really? I thought I came for the high score. Also received a Fashion Case which I am never, EVER going to use. Onwards we went to Floraoma Town via Route 204 taking names and kicking butts along the way.

"Ow, I've been hit by Splash! Like that really hurt!"

"I eat Cherubi for breakfast, right after my iron filings!"
The foe's WURMPLE fainted!

"No squealing or I'll feed you to that Starly over there."

I failed to mention that the Galaxy battle was my first taste of double battles in Platinum. This was the second.

"No tree is safe from you, zappy!"

But... but, you were supposed to pretend I said 'yes!'

So, this is like the business with Lostelle in FR/LG, but in reverse? Apparently some shady business was afoot with Galaxy Quest and the Valley Windworks.

Like in every video game ever!

Methinks I'll have this move.

Skimming the Meadow quickly because Imgur fudged my image order again after refreshing the tab and I've been working on this for over an hour. The Windworks Key was my reward for packing these Galaxy geeks away.

Hmmmmpff. Hmmmpff, HHMMMMPPPPFFF!!

And I don't like shitheads who preach garbage like this in every stinking generation. HACK WRITING, I SAY!

The office. These geeks look important. Sure enough, one is the professor and the other, Commander Mars and the battle music has changed to an intimidating beat. Whoa there, Ray Charles. No need to get fancy. I get the soundtrack is lightyears ahead of the wet trumpet that was the Game Boy Advance, but, really now? This is Pokémon, not Dragonforce!

This doesn't surprise me one bit.

"Hey, you, you ain't got no alibi, you're ugly! Hey you, ugly!"

...
Sorry, I dunno what happened there.

You're telling me! With all that done, Foundad was safe and well (oh hey, we have a GOOD scientist here!)

Very well.




Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 22
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 1
Badges - 1
Technical errors - 1 (foe Wurmple's KO message, lost to time...)
Strong-a-grams - 18

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
It's rude of me to not acknowledge the Universal Pokémon Randomizer rom tool for enabling me to change the starter Pokémon, or these challenges may not have been possible. That should have been a disclaimer on my first post if more than anything. Now if only to fix that stupid 'bump' sound.
What surprised me the most about Platinum is the level scaling compared to the older versions where I'd normally be overlevelled by up to 10 notches by the time I got the first gym badge. Not did I expect Machop having Low Kick at level 8 which put a dent in my pride. Foreshadowing what's to come? Maybe. Maybe... knowing the Sinnoh roster, they really have out for my choice of solo Pokémon and that's not just the rival's starter, which was my choice to make. Not naming any other names in particular but it will make my victory that much sweeter when they're overcome.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 3 - The Garden Thief

Seems like we're ditching the whole journal thing as it's not bringing me up to speed upon booting up the emulator. Keep in mind that I never asked for that option, okay? The Valley Windworks was where the action ended and continued at Route 205 towards Eterna Forest. Got to mention also that Diamond, Pearl and Platinum placed more emphasis on seeing Pokémon for the Pokédex count as opposed to catching them as we find out later, so that's good to know. Good for my solo for helping out with her own special way below.

Spoiler:

"Give up now while you're still young, too-hot-to-trot!"

"Your life jacket does what again?"

Look at Miss Late Bloomer over here. I know Roselia's a Gen 3 girl, but it's in Gen 4 where her star shone brighter.

"Put the roses down - this is a war, not a peace offering."

O-oooooh no, we're not opening those can of worms!

An Aipom. Worthy of note because unlike many of the Gen 2 Pokémon I met through Emerald and Fire Red, here was one yet to make its appearance on a later system, if I'm not mistaken.

"Let this be a lesson for you; never reach me down eye level."

One trainer brought out a... Piplup? I guess starters weren't as rare as we were thought to believe.

Yeah, I'll allow it.

ARON 3 - PIPLUP 0

Forest shenanigans afoot. At first, the SInnoh custom at the lady's house:

Well, excuse me, ma'am (I selected 'no,' by the way).

Eterna Forest, and there goes my privacy. A wandering trainer named Cheryl and her hopeless Chansey needed help to reach the exit and I was like, pffft, the frigging Chansey? She can take care of herself, but here we were getting a taste of double battles with no guarantee of losing ever at all thanks to auto-healing after each battle. But that's okay because...

I'm fairly certain that Cheryl was just lost in the woods and not looking for attention.

"Remind me not to get on your good side again."

"You'll think twice about evolving after this."

"See my metal sparks? You'd be a goner if you got too close to them."

"Who cares about the ears - what's with the diaper?!"

"Does it hurt when I do this?"

"That's pixie dust! What are you, a tinkerbell?"

"Hmmm... you're new to this yoga thing, aren't you?"

Couldn't cut through there yet, but I finished playing escort for the evening and was given the Soothe Bell in return for my services. The question stands, will we see her again?

Yoinking at the route after the forest.

"You can't get fired up on fancy, you hoity-toity showoff!"

And now, for a brief break. Eterna City. The background music seemed more befitting of a sleepy town in the Wild West of America than northern Japan, but leave it to the maestro to jazz it up one minute in.

Oh yeah, the watch. I shoulda checked that more often.

You've heard him! It's time!

But not right now!

Naturally, I got the Explorer Kit before I turned them down. Because Sinnoh.

I figured Team Galaxy was up to something around here but what is this, Capsule Corp?!

Ugh. Bicycles that don't come with a goddamn safety helmet. Sorry folks, but that's been one quibble of mine. The kid didn't seem to mind me checking the cash register.

The Gym Leader Gardenia gave me a warm welcome to the city, so imagine my displeasure when my rival got name dropped and I was reduced to a mere visitor. What does this kid have that I don't, besides a rapid pulse?

See. Toldya.

That's evidently so. I tried out the gym at the risk of feeding my solo to another embarassing defeat at the hands of some mon that shouldn't have a business of beating it (not in this chapter).

It reached Level 25. Take Down is a keeper, let alone that I favoured it over the more powerful Double Edge by accident in my Emerald playthrough.

Shush, you. By the way, it's a general rule that every gym leader to date and beyond takes up after an occupation; so what's Gardenia's job? A gardener? A landscaper? From the way she dresses, I think she's a thief. Yeah, definitely a thief. Everybody's entitled to their interpretation of the story.

Two can play that game, boi. Hey, I was pleasantly surprised that she used a Turtwig so I don't have to restart a run to track all the starters unlike other versions.

"If I'd been a sap like you, cousin, then my life would have taken a different turn."

Too bad I struggled with Cherrim as you'll see in Chapter 4. So I hit reset (don't forget that Cherrim) and set out to train Sugarkid.

"Ah, you spilled my espresso!"
"Oh, my Pepsi!"

Status: taken, for about 5 seconds. Mr. Talk of the Town here greeted me the usual way by guiding me to a specific point in question for some expositionary nonsense.

You know what he tried to say but the censors wouldn't allow it.

Gee, I bet Rocky Balboa didn't put up with that crap.

It's tradition.

Time to train at Route 211.

"Can't expect to do much with one foot, can you?"

"There's a bell born every minute."

Arbitrary job title alert!

Well what are you waiting for? My Aron will bring you luck! (of course I'm talking about the Pokémon, silly)

Don't flatter me. I do enough of that already.

And who in the world of hell would be hiding in three tiles of grass?

Arceus, give me- (not yet)

Sugarkid reached a couple notches higher outside Mt, Coronet, but not enough for the Gym. And finally, I was introduced to the one, the only... Cynthia-aaaaaaaaaa! My nervous system started going off even before she handed me a pity prize in form of HM01 Cut.

...

I don't like her.

I really do not like her.




Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 36
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 3
Badges - 1
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 19

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Sorry about the longer gap between chapters. I felt unwell in between and it really disrupted my rhythm.
After editing and reviewing this chapter in the past couple hours, some of you might take note that this isn't just a visual playthrough of the game, but also observational. Such is my habit to make light of choice dialogue and screenshots. I don't expect that to change but I can't depend on it alone, otherwise there would be a hundred of these chapters over each game I do a run of. It's a small hunch but maybe the remakes will be shorter?

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 4 - Galaxy For Rent

With the enigmatic Cynthia toodling off, we made progress around Eterna City whilst beefing up my solo Aron for the second Gym. It turned out there was much to see and do.

Spoiler:

Prof. Rowan's assistant and Lucas' father (his words, not mine) awarded me everyone's favourite macguffin, the Exp. Share! Like I'm ever gonna use that.

*grumble* ...lousy dictator.

As Cut cannot be readily used until the Gym is cleared, I had to notch up Sugarkid a few more levels. It was nowhere near the grindfest as Misty's Gym in Fire Red was, thankfully, and I got to discover a Bronzor, too.

"I always wanted my own bathroom mirror."

Level 29 got her an Iron Head, and I think we're ready for the kingdom of Gardenia.

Magical Leaf Sailor Moon did me in and I curse my bad fortune as Cherrim was added to the hallowed list of Cokodora Conquerors and a -1 image penalty for this post. The consequences are more dire as you think. Had to reset and try again.

Now that's more like it!

"Get back in the shade before I pluck the rest of you!"

My strategy here was switching to my two Bidoof for healing Aron and then switching her back in when the opponent downed the Bidoof. The plan worked flawlessly but my Bidoof might hold a grudge over me for it.

"Feeling proud because we got new evos?"

New badge! It was no Misty, but it wasn't a walk in the... er, you know.

Because the local community are cowards and chickens, they won't lift a finger against Team Galaxy save for one stubborn bicycle shop owner, so leave it to me to pull his butt out of the fire.

But first... hey, it's Thief! My suspicions about Gardenia's job might have been right on the money after all.

Looker in cognito! Come to think of it, I now imagine his voice having an Inspector Gadget twang to it with a dusting of Sean Connery. But that's just me. Despite not being useful in the Galaxy Building, he played the part of observer while I went in to blow this popsicle stand.

Yes! Yes please! Make him suffer for not throwing in a goddamn safety helmet with his bikes!

Oh for f... if I had a dollar for every time the same old bull like this gets spewed out, I'd retire next year. Now gimme that dollar.

Croagunk, a new poke to cater to the scrubs who couldn't make the grade (geez, a little on the nose, huh?) You know what would complete the look? A tattoo! (Okay, that's going too far).

"Please, I got more venom on my stubby leg."

Sharp Eyes does it again! A hidden item in this room. I felt kind of proud for finding that.

Welp, guess we're back to the scientists being depicted as evil scumholes again. So much for the friendly Windworks guy.

Damn, now that's evil. Using performance enhancement drugs in mid-battle. You had four moves to choose from, dude.

"Mess with my watch, and I mess with you."

Well, duh, the signs did give it any, dontcha think? Oh sorry. I wasn't supposed to question that logic.

Let's give these villains more of a personality that Team Rocket never had. It worked for Magma/Aqua, didn't it?

"My goodness, your performance STINKS!"

All this exposition and all I could think of was how much this floor looked like a kid's bedroom with the fancy wallpaper and everything. The item on the right was an Upgrade. I could think of a few things that needed 'upgrading' here.

One mass evacuation later and this property was now for rent, I suppose.

Oh, yippee ki-yay. It's Cynthia. I've never been her biggest fan, but let's have some fun messing her mind with a 'yes or no' game.

Naturally, I ended up with the Egg. This is going straight into the PC.

The Bicycle. I'm over the moon.

Maybe I'm just too bloody pedantic over rules and such irl, but there's no way I ever ride one without a helmet, and the Pokémon series were so slow on the uptake. I will not use this key item unless I'm forced to.

Better save here before someone comes along for a battle.

Please, you know what my answer is.

Worthy of note because this was my first instance of being paralysed and I haven't met my best friend Magnemite yet. The confusion stat is the new paralysis in this game, it seemed.

"Game over, Mickey Mouse. Game over!"

"Get flocked, beak breath!"

Well that's just mean! *sob*

Aron can overcome adversity, and this proves it!

"You are not Batmon - only Batmon can be Batmon."

Level 32 would have been a gamechanger if I had her evolve and also learn Protect, which I've never been keen on in battle.

Wayward Cave was beneath the bicycle path and the Looney Tunes iris wipe suggested that I turn off and call it quits. Just kidding. I needed Flash and wisely turned back.

"Your defeat is sweet music to me."

If by any chance a shiny comes along, this is the ball for the job.

'A lot of data...?' Aw, what did I do this time?!

Or, what am I about to do? Heh heh heh.

"You know what else burns me up? Your ass!"

"Your schnoz just got clogged, nosey parker!"

At this point, I listened to some of the trainers and got attracted to the idea of getting some fossils from the underground caves. There was one fossil that I'm especially after. You know what I did next?

I got BURNED ALIVE in a trap and forced to reset the software! (lacking a mic function on the emulator can do this to you. I'm sure there's a way around it when I find out how)

Uh crap, Lucas is gonna fight me- wait, no. It's a variation of the 'yes or no' game by choosing which hand to receive some pity prizes. He generously gave me both in the form of a Dowsing Machine and a Vs. Seeker.

Into Mt. Coronet.

"What is this, a B&B? Get outta my rocks!"

Outside... excuse me, but holy shoot, look at this image. A body of water, a pile of rocks, a rocky trail and just off the right side of the screen, a waterfall. Does my Pokémon look like a fuggin' Swiss army knife?

"Now buzz off and collect your honey."

"You know the difference between a dam nuisance and a damned nuisance? YOU!"

"Hey look, now you're imitating a loser!"

"Yeah, I'll put you in the compost heap with the others."

Contests. *deep breath* Hoo boy... are you ready for your first filler episode, everybody? You know I am!




Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 47
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 4
Badges - 2
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 20

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Nothing noteworthy to say this time, only that I'm eager to get started on the next log in my next day off.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 5 - Not Just A Seinfeld Episode

If the title doesn't show you just how old I am, maybe the memes will... we left off from Route 208 coming up to Hearthome City where - well, it's the hippest and most happening place to be for one special reason. Let's take a quick tour around 'cause this was only my second ever playthrough in Sinnoh to date.

Contests.

Spoiler:

Contests.

Yayyyyy.

Booooo. Also, contests.

NO! Don't take me to the contest! Phew, dodged a bullet.

Holy sh... is that a church? Nice to see Nintendo relaxed their stance on religious content in their games. Not a contest.

Inside the Fan Club, I had an interview. Of course I didn't say 'no.' It was a major stepdown from Emerald as only one word answers or phrases can be given for reasons unknown. How awkward would that be if real interviews are this short?

Speaking to the chairman finally gave me a taste of what he was talking about in unfiltered, uncensored detail. Sadly poffins weren't of any interest to me one bit.

Contests. yawn

Oh, this will come in handy. What's with the Quick Claw, though? It didn't trigger at all at this point.

Following the trend of arbitrary shenanigans in these later games, I had to find the Gym Leader and drag their caboose back to where they should be. Did I mention contest?

If I told her that there are now over a thousand in 2024, she'd probably lose her mind.

When I first heard about Pokémon Coordinators back in the day, I was confused as to what they meant. 'Coordinating' like directing race cars over the radio? Or directing the jets from Top Gun? It sounded daft to me.

Bebe's the name of the PC System Admin in Sinnoh. Catchy name, yeah? Bebe, as in BBnet? I dunno.

Psyche!

A genuine WTF moment was coming up, and I couldn't believe I got away with it. Just see for yourselves.

Another interview? Sure, why not?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was a motherlovin' Pokémon battle in a motherlovin' Pokémon Center! This was not the place for this sort of thing! How dare they fight in the Center! What the fudge?!

"Answer me this; what did you do to little Timmy?"

Oh yeah? What about me?!

My partner didn't comprehend the situation at the slightest. Oh shit, I'm so gonna get kicked out for this. Let's check with the nurse.

No? They seem okay with it. Not me.

Welp. Time to get this out of the way.

We met a familiar face and from the sounds of the Judge, looks like this contest thing is going to go my way, if you know what I mean. Oh my gosh, what am I typing?
Side note: not sure how such an experienced Judge can let their Buneary run off so easily.

Oh, and there's the Gym Leader, Fantina. Get back to work, scrub.

Christ, could they not look up the French word for 'strong?'

So naturally, I followed her to the Gym to put an end to this misery of strength-obsessed individuals. Look, I've been playing these games for 25 years. Don't tell me what I already know! Despite that, I didn't remember this gimmick with the flashlights and searching for the tile to pass through the correct door.

"Nyah nyah, I'm too stupid to be spooked. Wait a minute..."

The return of my least favourite trainer class; this time called 'Ace trainers.' Ace of what, pulling out potions in a pinch? Believers of their own hype, if you ask me.

"Even if I keel over one day, it won't be coming from you."

Awhawhawhaw, shut up.

"So you like the sound of crying? What kind of sadistic monster are you?"

Right, here we go, new Pokémon. The battle itself was a pushover with very little type weaknesses and more in the way of stat changes to slow me down, like sleep and confusion. You'd never believe how many times Sugarkid got confused to date. Kinda like me.

"Here's an incantation for you: blepblepblepblepblepblepblepblepblep."

*deep sigh* Here we go. "Strong this, strong that, strong, stronger, strongerest, strong, strong, STRONG!" F*ck me, that is quintessential hack writing this franchise is known for. Fantina's worse than the bloody Winstrate Famiy.

So the Relic Badge is mine, but the madness continued. Looking around Hearthome City was all I could do before I looked for a reason to use the Defog HM.

Apparently, Aron is not cute/privileged enough to accompany me in the Amityville Horror Square. Scandalous.

Ooooooh, I'm gonna tell my friend in Johto what you said in the next episode!

The exit gate on the lower right suggested me the next loca- oh good grief, it's him.

Yup, we're going to have a battle right here in this gate of all places.

Mr. Impulsive has upgraded his kid penguin to that awkward adolescent middle-evo penguin. Prinplup hit me with Bubblebeam which nearly did me in, but I wasn't worried. Regarding the rest of his team, he didn't really make any improvements.

"Out of all the Prinplups I've seen, you are low class."

Yeah, smack his bottom! Smack his bottom!!

Sorry about that.

Well, that's a mature response to defeat, isn't it?

No comment. Buzz off.

Geez, can you believe that nut?

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You know, I did more ranting and rambling than normal in this chapter, chiefly to get these nagging bits out of my chest and I'm feeling mighty bad. I promised you a filler episode and I haven't yet given you what you wanted. After some progress with aquiring the Defog HM which we'll see in the next chapter, I went back and did the Contest. How did I do?

Pretty damn well. :>




Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 53
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 4
Badges - 3
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 32

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Come to think of it, it was at this point when Pokémon introduced me to some of the series' glaring annoyances when I had my first adventures in Sinnoh around 2009. They were mostly about the story and dialogue exchanges. Hard to find fault with party raising and the battle mechanics. This was after my break following Gold and Silver when I generally accepted everything thrown at me at face value. I returned to Pokémon in my young adulthood firmly noting what I like and did not like about it. It's difficult to explain but the humour in my travel logs are intended to shield myself from getting too put off from enjoying the games. On one hand it works brilliantly enough to reap the benefits of postgame content, but on the other hand there were those I couldn't bring myself to finish like ORAS, Sun, Let's Go Eevee, Legends: Arceus and the first Ranger game. Rambling aside, I will no doubt reach the end of Platinum even if it takes me a big portion of the year.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 6 - Greetings From Texas

Let's get this battle out of the way first:

"Get the hell out of here, and tell all your useless friends about me."

Now that's how you start a post. Alright, now onto the log.

Spoiler:

Rumblings were heard of yet another HM for my utility belt. This time being Defog which is needed to clear the bad weather, and the results of which were badly executed. You'll see why further down. Seeing as neither Bidoof or Aron can learn this move, I needed an additional 'mon to take care of the situation.

This was the part before the Contest at the end of Chapter 5. I refused to take the Good Rod before I realised what Pokémon I wanted to catch with it.

Wassup, Sugarkid? Yeah, that Pikachu. Let's... PUSH IT INTO THE RIVER!

Big oop moment. It was just a kid in a Pikachu suit. My mistake. A lotta baby Pokémon from here to make me look bad.

"They should throw you out with the other faulty goods, half pint."

"Nothing left of you but stardust."

The underground vents seemed inviting. Please, please come down and get burnt alive again. It was so much fun. Uh, no thanks.

And then suddenly, this Cowgirl trainer appeared. In Sinnoh? Something felt off to me...

Great. These losers are back. It's only downhill from there for them, you know.

We reached [INSERT FAKE EEVEE EVO NAME HERE] Town and- ow boy, here he comes!

KAPOW! Right in the kisser! Oh wait... that's only in my mind. Damn.

Hold up, he wants to play tour guide with me again. No no no! Don't lead me there-

But then he changed gears and spouted off something I don't remember. Whew, that was closer than the last time.

Well, yeah, I figured. Anyway, Solaceon Town was the name, and ranching was the game. Wait. It was then I realised something from my Pearl playthrough in 2010. This hokey cowboy setting isn't the first thing I thought of Japan's northernmost region, but the area in question is famous for its quality meat and dairy so I'll let them off with that.

Oh, snap, again?!

Prof. Oak's words echoed: Oh, for ^*&('s sake. So pushy as always...

Why was I surprised, then outraged, by this? Here's why. When your first battle in FRLG took place in Oak's Lab, the confinements were okay because the starting Pokémon only resorted to the bare minimal attacks like growling and scratching. Hardly anything to bring the building down; not to mention the noise they would cause. Now consider the anime when Ash and Pikachu fended off Team Rocket's first encounter in the Center, the place pretty much blew up with the monster's fancy moves and nobody got the blame. This is a phenomenal mindscrew when you think about it. It doesn't make sense to have battles in Pokémon Centers. The authorities would not allow it.

Or maybe, you know, Sinnoh residents have no respect for personal boundaries. Just go with that logic.

Nope, the Nurse didn't care one bit.

Over there was the honest-to-good Daycare, which I was actually thankful to find this far in. I was sure the owners have rehearsed their lines by now.

Right. The Solaceon Ruins. The rival mentioned either that, or the Lost Tower. It made sense to visit the ruins first because that's where the Defog HM was found. Not to sound insincere but the Braille gimmick was cast aside for the Unown alphabet. The secret to this maze was solved soon enough.

'Course I couldn't leave without meeting one of those sentient alphabet soups. In this case, it was the 'E' form. Do note I had to be selective with my images from now on because the content had to be trimmed down to not excceed the confounded image count. Besides, I thought Unown before and the chances of seeing these Gen 1-3 Pokémon again are slight unless I needed to make an observation.

"I can read without your help, thanks."

Defog was picked up and it was there and then that I did the Contest in Hearthome and became master of my domain in the Tough category (bah, so much for not referencing Seinfeld...). But come on, catching the right poké for the job was more important, right?

He gave me the Good Rod and then proceeded to explan the process anyway even if I selected 'no.'

There. Go over there.

"Back to the muddy riverbed where you belong, loach."

Saw that dude already. Not important to show you that.

Then it hit me. Wrong part of Route 205! The area before Eterna Forest was where I should be casting out.

Caught this darling [INSERT ANOTHER FAKE EEVEE EVO NAME HERE] with the Premier Ball (a nicer looking ball than the ol' red and white. I learned my lesson this time).

Its name? Justice. Pronounced 'just', 'ice' (that's the cold stuff). Finneon is another personal favourite of mine but never used in any of my teams to date. It's unfortunate it become another one of my HM buddies.

This was where I needed to use the new HM, in the Lost Tower. I knew then straight away that a dreadful thought was coming to me.

FFFFUUUUUUUUwuwuwuwuwububububububububububu-

Yes. Another Pokémon burial ground, another excuse to battle over their dead remains. Sorry, literally speaking. I am appalled. Third time they pulled this stunt off, you know.

"What goes around, comes around, you nectar-nicking creepy crawler!"

"Now say 'I'm a loser ten times...' backwards. In Latin."

The BGM didn't have a lot going for it, either, as it recycled the tune first heard from Eterna Forest. Solemn or serene maybe, but I wasn't feeling it.

This is where I use Defog? But... I can still see clearly. What you playing at, game?

Oh, you mother-

Heh heh. Irony.

See? No respect for boundaries.

Something tells me I am not in the vicinity of Hokkaido anymore. Also when Sugarkid levelled up, Iron Tail was not worth it for the low accuracy rate. I mean, Aron doesn't have have a tail!

"Go... go... go frighten a scarecrow or something!"

I sensed annoyance from my companion. At the top of the tower, using the HM once more allowed the two ladies to reward me with tags that I highly doubt I will use. Defog? More like Defuq! I still couldn't vouch for the HM's usefulness here. Maybe a later point?

Back outside, I had a feeling that I should head north to the next place.

I said north! Not west! I thought this was Sinnoh, not Texas!

"Pfft. I got all the luck I need right here."

MOVING ON!!!!!

"No horse can gallop that fast, you flamin' fool!"

"Begone, moon monster."

Now to give the babies some 'care and attention'. My stars, what are we reduced to?

"Can't use this plug; its horns are bent."

"Go on, pick me up - I'll be here all day."

"You were the dribbling spits out there, kiddo."

"You only had four moves to choose from, egghead!"

Phew. Thank goodness that portion of the route is done with. Time to seek refuge in the milk bar.

The waitress is a trainer, everybody. THE WAITRESS IS A BLOODY TRAINER! WHOOPPEEEEEEE!

"Better watch your calories, munchwad."

"Can't lift this, you honey-licking hunk of junk."

Never a dull moment in the open, beating heart of Texas- I mean, Sinnoh, it seems. Bought some of that milk as a memento. Now the question stands: where's Miltank?

Aw cripes, now this game has treasure hunter trainers. What next, a clown?

Oh, a ruin maniac! Pardon me, sir. I was mistaken.

"Hmmm... somehow I don't see any resemblance."

Did he say... ? No, no, I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. He really said 'banana fries.' Yeah.

"Is there anything your clapper can't do, besides losing badly?"

"Some 'mon still needs to take swimming lessons."

"Nothing but hot air 'til the end."

I gotta say, the double battle with the pretentious Ace Trainer duo at the end of Route 125 was good. I mean, so good. Six Pokémon to my four one. Wouldn't mind more of those.

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Sorry. I am so sorry, I need to do this. It's been fun and everything but this chapter needs to close. There is no room for any more stuff. Cutting right to the chase, I passed through the gates to Veilstone City and did some sightseeing - on my own accord, thank you - and then I saw my fate spelled out in these simple words at the Gym:

Boy, I am in deep shi-


Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 74
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 4
Badges - 3
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 32

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Time to collect my thoughts with this chapter, but this time in bullet points;

• You might have sensed a small deal of annoyance in my comments with this run, and you may be right. By the time I began post-editing the chapter, I had a fun time ripping aspects of the game that would have otherwise irked me. That's the process of how this log is put together, so please don't take this too seriously. :>
• I came close to using strong swears numerous times here to convey said annoyance (now imagine if you were sitting next to me as I played through all that footage last week - my mood was real!). I assure you that this won't be a regular occurence.
• See that very last screenshot that closed the chapter? Good. Now remember the grinding I had to do to overcome Misty in FireRed with a level 30 Aron? And what about the Battle Fronter-style training at the tail end of Emerald? I have this feeling that this will be the mother of all grinds for this Steel user thanks to a certain blue dog with a 4x type effectiveness. It won't be fun, but unfortunately have to be dealt with so I can have the results to show for it, otherwise the challenge in Platinum will go at a snailspace. Among these images are clues that- ah, what am I saying? Just see how the next chapter pans out! You'll be surprised as I am.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 7 - Problem? What Problem?

Slower than a Slowpoke with a hernia, I pressed on diligently towards my fourth Gym Badge, and I'm going to get it whether I like it or not. I did the research and there's no other way to get by than brute force. But I couldn't do that without moseying around Veilstone City first. Gee, I hope I can remember what I did around here.

Very proud of its rock heritage (but surely the gym is not???)

Spoiler:

These people are finally getting the hint of what 'no' means for a change.

Aw, criminy. The TV crew are here. This time I'm really going to nuke this Center like in the anime.

OH HAI MAGS! Aron's best friend made the cut in Platinum, and you can bet I'll be sorry they did when I go further in.

"I'll be waiting for you when you're tougher... friend."

"Get a haircut, youngster!"

The hub of crime, and yet the authorities do nothing. Hmm.

In the Game Corner... Sugarkid's hidden type was Fire. Fat lot of help that was.

Deadbeat Dad Alert! Deadbeat Dad Alert!

There must be a purpose for this platform.

Not sure how they managed to give my steel girl a massage. A spit shine and polish, maybe?

I was still half expecting a Clown trainer battle somewhere down the line. Heck, they've thrown in half of all the occupations I never thought of.

Pardon? Do I hear an echo, or what?

Sugarkid: Hey, whaddya say? Are you taking on the Gym Lea-

Me: Oh, shut up, all of you!

Aside from Lucas, we met another Gym Leader loathing on the job, and he better get his roided butt back where he belongs if I'm ever gonna get anywhere (yet more prophetic words that will come back to haunt me).

Well, here we go. The Fighting Gym, with a 4x type advantage against my solo Pokémon. What chance do I have now? We can't go over it nor under it, but straight through. So we started out by knocking over some punching bags to clear the obstacles with an occasional battle against the Black Belts.

Machoke was very lucky to KO Aron in FireRed - and a wild encounter at that - and I couldn't afford to make the same mistake again.

"Don't 'choke' on me, bro. Hahaha!"

She learned Double Edge at level 43. A well deserved effort. A definite must have for sure!

When I had my last pizza this month I caught hayfever, but this is no excuse!!

Time to meet my Maker, by way of Maylene, the Fighting gym leader. Oh, shit, she's one of those people judging by her dialogue. Is there a chance we could tone down the s----- thing, please? I said 'please.'

Her first Pokémon was Meditite, a total pushover who couldn't lift a finger to my Double Edge. Before it fainted, I made sure to max out Sugarkid's defense stat with Iron Defense three times in preperation for the rest of her team. Planning ahead at its finest.

Are you ready for this? Here comes...

LUCARIO! Give 'em a round of applause for its Force Palm.

As this is a travel log - and it is my log - I thought I'd leave my two cents about this Pokémon. When I returned to the series in 2008, Lucario seemed to be everywhere. From being the cover darling in various advertising materials to receiving top billing on a recent movie, and also being a blessed fighter in Smash Bros. Brawl... I had the impression that it was purposefully designed that way just to drive sales and have a following, similar to how well Charizard and Pikachu were treated. You could tell just by looking at Lucario that this Pokémon is a top draw and it was going to take the shine from the other then 400-plus monsters and counting. As for me? I hated it. Hate it, hate it, hate it. I knew it would be popular with its dog-like build and I also knew exactly where that fanbase was coming from. See, when something gets popular and you're not down with drinking a certain kind of Kool-Aid, you want to get the hard facts and learn why it worked rather than take it for granted. By skipping the series for a long while in the mid-2000s, I felt Lucario had to prove to me that it can stand on its own paws. Funnily enough, for the next year coming, it won me over with the movie and looking at the imaginative fan art overtime, I began to love it. Love it, love it, love it! But not like it enough to remain my top favourite. We're good friends now. So, there's my story.

If I lose to this one, I will hang my head in shame.

I... I... I... I I I I...

"That so-called aura you speak of? Smoke and mirrors... a lot like you!"

Fuggedaboutit! Of course I beat it! The Defense boosting paid of, and to think I needed Endeavor, too.

You said it, girl.

I told you to tone that shit down!! Gawd, you're just as bad as Fantina!

See, the insipid dialogue always brings it down for me. But you know that already, and I am going to move on to the next place.

Right after that letdown, Lucas skulked outside for the second time. He really had nothing better to do? Hang on, because he's about to...

...hold my hand to lead me halfway across the city in a scripted scene. Yep, just like everybody and their dog had done, or tried to do, in this game. I'm all for recurring gags but I'm not having much fun with this one.

*sigh* Gimme a dollar everytime I hear this from them.

[insert joke here]

Looker arrived on the scene and took some abuse from Lucas who was still salty about having his Pokédex taken by Team Galaxy. Afterwards, if you said another scripted hand-holding scene was coming my way, give me an 'EFF YEAH!'

Looker assumed the role of 'Captain Obvious' and told me I couldn't do squat in this warehouse. Well, thanks for that.

Hey, spoilers, dude! Don't tell me what's in that item ball without me checking first!

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*mutter*what's with this game...?*mutter*

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It's okay. Remember the Challenge. Must beat the Pokédex. Aron is counting on me.

Where to now? Route 214 towards Pastoria City.

Emerald had the better idea with multiple word/phrases for their interviews. Still, one of those is more than Red will ever say in a lifetime.

Drums, please.

Alright, back to battling - the meat and potatoes of this quest. Also, meet the PI. What?

"Hey, Kirl-ia. You fight like a girl-ia!"

Choose a path.

The upcoming Collector had an awesome array of Pokémon in his team. Have a butchers at these:

"Losing like this must make you hungry, you know?"

"Look at you - your head is like one giant eyeball!"

"Hey there, Banana Chops. Ha, I always wanted to call you that."

"Beating you is like bending spaghetti."

"Come find me in case you're hungry for another beatdown."

...and Croagunk.

What? I already fought Croagunk.

"Pshaw, call that a dress?!"

"Nice move, genius."


One trainer gave a shout out to these losers.

"Thunder fox, you're not fit enough to power up a live concert."

"Water fox, your furry scales clog up the swimming pool."

"Fire fox, you make a lousy service provider."


There seemed to be some familiar faces around since I fought that Collector. Good thing Sugarkid was never at a loss for words.

"Survive enough falls and you'll end up small, round and cute. Like me!"

"Your loss was so devastating, the whole internet could feel it."

"It's way past your bedtime, pup."

And we're supposed to believe that just because you said so, huh?

Wait. That music... ah, so that's where that ditty came from! It's been in my head for years since Pearl. Here it comes:

duuh du duh du-DUH DUH!

Anyhow, we came to Lake Valor and haven't found a great deal of anything to do here.

Shoulda called it 'Skid Row.'

duuh du duh du-DUH DUH!





Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 95
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 4
Badges - 4
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 36

Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
So, forget what I said about tough drilling. I lucked out on the Maylene fight after all, but not without realising something else on my mind. I remember most of the other Gym Leaders and as it turned out, I am one third over my type hurdles. There is also a Ground and a Water type based gym ahead. And of course, the Champion. Man, Steel types sure got the raw deal in D/P/Pl. Besides that, I had a lot of fun with this part, and what's more, my notes no longer overlap to the next chapter because of some silly image count. Everything's back on track. The weather outside is improving behind the scenes and there are other gaming stuff I have on the go, which explains the slower pace of this travel log. At its core, beating the Pokédex Challenge is still the primary goal and corny jokes aside, I have never forgotten the intent of this series.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 8 - Misty-eyed Flashbacks
It's been two and a half months since the last chapter... let's see if I still got this.

Spoiler:

Right, let's take a look at the first two images sitting at the top in my screenshot folder. Forgive me for being rusty.

Oh yeah, it's one of those pretentious Tubers. Enlighten me with your insightful wisdom, Jared! Evidently enough, both East and West variants of Shellos revealed themselves to me. Sugarkid must be bored out of its mind during our break. Speaking of Tubers, I'm going to be flooded with Water type Pokémon for the first half of the chapter as I think you know what I've been up against.

"East coast, west coast garbage. You're all the same to me."

Metal Burst... I don't think it's that useful but it'll serve as a placeholder for a real move later.

Yes, I know. And it's called 'duuh du duh du-DUH DUH!' Seriously, what was the point in discovering a new area when there was jack all to do? It's like Tarrey town in Legend of Zelda BotW that you literally build from scratch but less memorable and engaging.

The House of Foot. Time for me to gloat how awesome Aron is and receive a Ribbon for being such darn good friends. That's more than TPC have ever done for the Aron line in Gen 9, so there! The good feeling won't last as I will meet Dr. Facepalm in Pastoria City. You'll see.

"Dontcha' know it's rude to spit?"

"So, how is this 'smashing cities' thing working out for you?"

Gotta save beforehand in case something stupid happens through the gate. It usually does.

I don't know, and I don't care.

Pastoria City, and when I think of marshes, I think of bayous, like the one in Disney's The Rescuers which I always loved and cried a lot watching. How about we have a real bayou setting in the next region, please? Roll the commentary.

Um, I don't know what you're talking about!

FFS, this crap again. How I never got banned for life by having battles in Pokémon Centers is beyond me. It makes as much sense as turning the radiator on in July. And here is today's arbitrary trainer class: the Idol. Which must be a pretty sweet gig if you like having agents telling you what to do and not think for yourself. What a soul crushing job. Stick to indies.

...no, not touching that with a 50 foot pole.

Egad, it's worse than I thought!

Thanks, Dr. Facepalm. I'm not sending you Christmas cards anymore. Poffins aren't much of a big deal for me in this playthrough, or not yet anyway.

Hey kids, can you say 'RUNNING JOKE?' Mr. Gatorade returned to size me up for a battle in this exact spot in front of the gym's door.

No way, I wanted that move!

Then I fudged up. Restart!

You're telling me! The rival still acted surprised by losing again, it's kind of cute. Dunno where the theme song line came from. Into the Gym, then, which was probably scared me away from playing for months.

It's a Water Gym. Not the best news my Steel/Rock type girl wanted to hear. I won't lie, I lucked out with Maylene's Fighting squad before, and it was due to my solo's high Defense stat. Water types, on the other hand, favour Sp. Attacks and Sugarkid's Sp. Defense left a lot to be desired. It's gonna be Misty all over again with the grinding. I decided to push through beating the trainers and leave Crusher Wake alone until further exploring outside the city.

"You went from Emerald Champion to this?!"

"Leave my fries alone, you!"

"Do you have room in that beak for little ol' me?"

"This ain't water polo, lil' mousey!"

"What's that? Got wet behind the ears? Oh, I'm so sorry."

"Who do you think you are? Stupid unicorn wannabe guppy."

"You're the only 'mon I know that can swim and suck at the same time."

Holy smokes, did you see that? Can't think why this keeps happening when I gain that much EXP.

A selfie shot with the wrestler and then I ran away for dear life. Great Gym Leader, by the way! I used to be a pro wrestling fan before it got carried away with beards, tattoos, racist Hulk Hogan and other stupid shit like that so I'm now in it for the nostalgia when wrestlers looked like - well - wrestlers. Duh.

Off outside to the Great Marsh, and I wished I put on a swimsuit for this mudbath thing going on there. It was time to level up some more; no choice, really. Pretty surprised to see Luxio this late in the game.

"Time to clip those claws of yours, hairball."

Parasol Lady? Get a real job! And while you're at it, better get the Wooper line out of the way.

"Two words: eat dirt."

"I see you didn't take that fight seriously at all."

The Collector (not pictured) gave us some fan service with Umbreon and Espeon:

"LIGHTS OUT, BABY!"

"Predicting the weather... that's your special ability?!"

This was the Blue Shard House, and excuse me? Fury Cutter? Pffft, who's gonna use that? Not like I'm going out my way getting stuck in traps in the Undergound for shards all the time.

Aaaaaaah yeah! Toxic, a VERY good move that just might be my ticket to the Champion. I'd better hold on to it until the time is right. I mean it makes sense finding this TM in the bog, doesn't it?

Sinnoh is getting out of hand that even the police are involved. Where were they when Team Galctic is running amok? Bet they were busy playing Pokémon Go and received their pink slips the next day. HA!

What's more, bring on the hardcore Rangers. I still picture them as the vigilante type judging by official artwork from later games. They put up a good battle and I got to see some new faces.

"Dude, what's with the war paint?"

"Photosynthesize THIS, pal!"

The eventful fight brought Sugarkid up to level 50, halfway to maxing out! It was such an event that I'll spare you the agony I suffered in the Pokémon Mansion that was coming up, and end it here (you just know I'm doing this to fill my 100 image quota, don't you? *wink* ).

Scratch that, I have about 84 images, but still...





Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 112
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 5
Badges - 4
Technical errors - 1
Strong-a-grams - 39


Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
Please welcome Prinplup to the Conquerors club! Thanks to my shoddy efforts in battle. The two month long break couldn't be helped as my personal life was going through some changes. I still have my job, but my social life kicked back into gear since the pre-Covid years following a convention in Tokyo. I'm pleased I went overall, even though those changes affected my downtime in a big way. Hey, I have a partner now (sorry, that sounds like bragging). Now we're in July with the hot humidity kicking in and it's starting to turn my mind into mush. It's hard to get into gaming and arting when I'm like this.
Last Tuesday I decided to get back into the travel log before it got too overwhelming. Editing this post made me realise that I have not forgotten much which makes me so happy, and I guess I'm going to continue the Platinum solo challenge even if this log takes me up to the end of the year. I hope it wraps up sooner than that but we'll see.
Hey, it's funny that I've been talking a lot about my personal goings on and not enough about what's coming up in Platinum. Like I said, I beaten Pearl but neither Diamond or Platinum and this is considered new territory. Sadly I don't except the dialogue to be any better and I'd swear up and down that I could write better material in my sleep. But you haven't seen me in the Mansion yet.
Hope you enjoyed the log/commentary all the same! It's good to be back.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 9 - Misery at the Mansion

Back in the saddle once again, so let's cut to the chase. First, a message from my rival's Prinplup following my shocking defeat at Pastoria City:

Thanks for that. Moving on from Route 212.

Oh no, no no no no no. Not this place. Not here! There's kind of a good reason I dreaded writing up this log, and I think you know what it is.

Spoiler:

The Pokémon Mansion, owned by the guy named Backlot. It's true! As for the Swagger TM, we're doing enough of that already just like the Taunt. Think of it as our coping mechanism for what's coming up.

One of the main draws of the Mansion is that a handful of Pokémon outside Sinnoh can be caught here daily, but not until the National Pokédex is acquired - which will NOT happen in this challenge! Nothing useful to me so far, though the worst was yet to come.

CAUTION: this section contains strong language beginning with the letter 's' and ending with 'g'.​

​

And today's arbitrary Trainer Class is... the Maid. There, are you otakus happy now? Five of them were to be beaten under very special conditions and none of them can talk for shit.

So let me get this straight: not only was I treated to the worst display of dialogue that make the Winstrates from Hoenn sound like normal human beings, but I had to beat each of their team in less than five turns to get anything out of this? What a waste of f*cking time. Sorry for sounding such a sourpuss but it really needed to be said, and it totally wasn't the reason I sat on this post for three months. That sucked major league. Don't ever test my nerves again.

Okay, deep breath. *hooooo* There.

Never mind that. You know the saying 'there is sunshine after the rain?' It means we are over with this crap and happier times will be ahead. Trust me!

Yes, officer. Please arrest those Winstrate Wannabees in the Mansion for putting me in a foul mood.

Yeah! In fact, she has to use the flashlight during the day. *click* And you, leave the jokes about yo momma to me! Uh... you can unlock the handcuffs now.

If anyone wondered what on earth I was supposed to be doing in this chapter besides the usual riffing, I needed to buff up my solo Pokémon a few more levels before I felt brave enough to take on the Water Gym Leader in Pastoria City... with my Steel/Rock type Aron and its double weakness to Water. Remember the amount of grinding I had to do before Misty's gym back in FireRed? Don't wanna go through that again. Here's hoping level 51 would be enough to put Crasher Wake on the rocks.

Here we go! Quagsire was down with some effort.

If you mean the 'bait and switch' with weaker Pokemon as I heal my solo, then yes, that was a good move. What other choice did I have? :>

Brine and Aqua Jet were the two moves that I had to be wary of as well as any surprise critical hits. Just a little more...

"Pow! Right in the happy sacs!"

Alright! Done in one go without any mishaps! Can you believe the Fighting and Water gyms were my major obstacles at that point and I passed through them without much issue?

Amen to that, brother.

You know what isn't fun? Passing the game over to these bozos so they have more to talk about. At least they're not using any bad language this time *wink*. Now it was something about a bomb and me going after a Galactic Grunt while Vector and Wake play heroes.

No, not chopped liver. I meant you're offal - I mean, AWFUL!! Gotta love that loser.

To cut this short, I ended up chasing the Grunt in the wrong direction of the map of which route I can't recall, but I did pass through the town where nothing happens; except something did happen with the Suite Key and had it exchanged for the White Flute.

Best region in the world, baby! High five!

Found 'em, but lost 'em. Meanwhile, Looker wasn't lookin' hard enough.

The Grunt did not put up much of a fight at all.

Ah crap, here comes Cynthia and VEC SHUT YOUR FREAKING MOUTH YOU ROM COM REJECT!! I could almost hear the Bridget Jones' Diary soundtrack playing in my head in this sequence.

...

What do you think, dear readers?

You know how much I never liked Cynthia as a character, strutting around the region like she owns the place with her smug look, her droopy hair and prized land shark dragon thingy. Here, she gave me a clue and a Secret Potion to cure the Psyduck in Route 210, which she could probably have done herself instead of mooching offscreen and watch from the sidelines.

Saving in case anything else happens!! The Grunt chase had me thinking: I needed to Fly to reach places faster, especially without the fast froward emulation hotkey to rely on. A new Pokémon was needed and that Pokemon was...

Skylark the Staravia. Its next evolution Staraptor has always given me 'Vanilla Ice' vibes. The singer, not the JoJo character. Don't ask.

Did you know I love giraffes?

"When your butt does all the thinking, you're screwed!"

See? She coulda done it herself.

Oh, get a load of this, everyone: Cynthia is afraid of her own grandmother. She's scared of her own grandma! This is rich! You just need to read between the lines.

"About time some 'mon knocked you upside the head."

If you thought the last sequence was... fogged up, here's some inexplicable environmental effects.

Well that's where you're wrong, because I used...

A fish!

Ace Trainers talking bull as usual. After all, she had Grotle to show for it.

"I'd feel lousy too if I had brocolli stuck on my back."

I could have given her the bird but I just caught Staravia.

Oh snap, I forgot to record Raichu!

The foe's RAICHU fainted!

"Cuter, but not any more tougher."

"Hmmmm. Frank Zappa would like to have a word with you."

"Stick to grass cutting, greenthumbs."

The last leg of this log took me to Celestic Town for - you know - subbing for Cynthia. Oh geez, that hurts to type, let alone think out loud.

Clowning around in the Pokémon Center. This doesn't surprise me anymore. Why am I not banned from these Centers yet?

"If this were a pantomime, you'd be cast as the Dame."

Must... resist... urge... to make... mom joke... "so old... bought... cave painting...in an... auction!" Oof.

I get that this was an old fart's PokéMart, but the Wise Glasses were handed to me free of charge. Unfortunately, my solo was a physical attack specialist so these specs were of no use other than for looking like a wise guy.

If she is who I think she is...

Hey, I made one of these over the summer! All for only £30.

Say it with me one more time: if I had a dollar every time I heard that from a grunt...

Not that it's terribly noteworthy, but I met the lady who was Cynthia's granddaughter and she... didn't come off so 'bossy' as much as she was having a heated philosophical debate with the Galactic head Cyrus. I mean anyone can do that! She didn't seem so bossy at the slightest. So what the heck did Cynthy had to be scared of?? I cared little for this exchange other than to tick Sneasel off my list from the battle with Cyrus.

"So tell me... what's so special about those eggs, anyway?"

Then when the smoke was cleared and I got the Surf HM, she showed up like the ungrateful coward she was! Unbelievable. She's got no guts, that girl.

Let's check imgur: no more images. Good. Now onto the stats.






Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 117
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 5
Badges - 5
Technical errors - 2 (missed Raichu's KO message)
Strong-a-grams - 49


Cokodora Conquerors


Closing Notes
Three months since the last instalment? Ouch, my social life has gotten hectic. The writeup has all been done the morning before on my day off work and some editing today. It was good, until I got a cold halfway through which I think was from my jetlag over a recent holiday. I'm pleased with my edits and it doesn't cost anything to be your own moderator other than a bit of your time. Heck, if I came off irritated here, you should have seen my first draft! I promise you won't be waiting three more months for Part 10.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 10 - My Most Metal Day Ever

Cutting to the chase here with my last location when I started up my file a few days ago. If anyone enjoyed my slandering of Cynthia in the last episode, try the shrimp. There's more to come. For now, sources told me that I should head to the next place... Canalave City. It was unreachable by Surf, so down went the hatch for Finneon.

Spoiler:

The surfing music is okay, not much attachment to it.

"Listen up, kid. Manta rays and fish don't mix!"

"You're cold sushi, 'Zubat of the sea!'"

I feel old. It doesn't help that I know the reference.

Thanks, whitecoat. Revolutionary Pokédex technology 101!

Don't you start opening those can of worms!

Canalave City with probs the only town theme I dig, especially in the nightime. Hold on a minute...

No battles in a Pokémon Center? Phew. Just checking.

Aw, geez. Just when things were going dandy, Mr. Saturday Morning Cartoon here reared his ugly speedy head. Like, I haven't been playing Platinum a whole lot for half a year and it doesn't feel like he left the picture. Since we're clashing on the bridge, my rival gets to be the cooler character: Gilgamesh.

Let's what what he had: Staraptor, Empoleon, Heracross, and...

No. Screw it.

I can't handle this.

*reset*

Time to go shopping.

9,999? I mean sure, technology has its limits.

So, the idea was this; since it is a solo challenge, then you really gotta show it that it's indeed a solo effort. The idea of using battle items like X Attack and Guard Spec. came out of the blue. If this was a standard playthrough with a party of six without the fancy gimmicks to make it challenging, I would never - NEVER - entertain the thought of using these items in battle when a simple move or healing item would suffice. This line of thinking carried with me from, ooooh, my first game in Red. I never saw the use in them... until now. So I had the money and bought 10 of each in Veilstone Dept. Store. I'm sure that I will need them from now on.

Back in Canalave...

Rematch with my rival, started by giving his Staraptor a taste of his own medicine before switching to my solo.

The Vanilla Ice wannabe birb was nothing and gave me the time to supplement Aron with much needed Defense and Sp. Defense boosting roids for later. And hey, she withstood Brick Break and Bubblebeam! Afterwards, Roserade and Rapidash went down like a house of cards (Roserade was beaten before).

"You had a problem - I just solved it."

"What tree did you fall from to end up with this loser?!"

"Hmmmm... I thought you were taller. Oh wait - you're on the floor! Hahaha!"

"Hi-ho, Silver! Go away!"

Oh, and before I forget:

This city had three things going for it: the Gym, the library, and the ferry to Iron Island. Two of these will be covered in this log. The library was first and aside from the... LORE, as the cool kids say, nothing useful was gained. What kind of nerd obsesses over the lore, anyway? I wasn't a big deal in my time. *wink*

Oh stand back, everyone! I'm about to explode in merriment by sarcasm from the TV.

Well, okay.

Riley, who may or may not be an ancestor of the late, great, and most totally dead Aaron of Lucario and Mystery of Mew fame, stood there specifially to give me an HM. He tried, he really did. Couldn't use the bloody thing until the next Gym badge was claimed. I mistakingly thought that I needed Strength to get around Iron Island so I left it there and took on the Gym.

"Bow down and gravel, you toothless, dirt earting gargoyle!"

That Steelix was easy as pie. Unlike some other Steelix...

Never, ever listen to anything coming out of an Ace Trainer's mouth.

"That's what you get for running with... with... with SCIZORS! Hah!"

Here's the strange thing about this Gym. The Leader, Byron, is a miner, but has chosen to locate himself upwards with elevators going... up? Not... underground? Must be playing against type.

Funny that I did the same thing with the rival fight and had one battle to feel my opponent before hitting that reset button to do some shopping.

Now then. The last big fights haven't been so kind to my solo of choice. I overcame a Fighting and then a Water type Gym along with a rival battle that forced me to play opposite of my own style, and now this. Same type, and a Steelix that knows Earthquake. This version may have dealt the better hand, but I'm going to made do with what I got.

Nope. Aron can't learn Fire Blast. Dang. I considered traversing through Iron Island to get the egg from Riley but that wouldn't be fair if my solo had a bodyguard hanging around. Another option was a Ground type TM that Aron can learn. Can you guess which one I looked for first?

The Wayward Cave in Route 206. Then I found this little diamond in the rough (hint, hint):

"Chew on that, pint size!"

Other than that, no dice.

Um... that happened. Jerk just ran off without much of a fu- wah - thank you very much.

When I should've went to the other place instead:

There. Dig TM in 20 seconds. Not 15 minutes in that danged Wayward Cave.

Which goes to show, I do make a habit of running in circles. And here's another one. I remained hesistant on giving Aron the Dig TM and wondered if I can make do with the battle items again. If it worked against my rival, then you know...

Byron's Magneton acted like the rival's Staraptor while I gave Aron up to five each of the following items:

• Hyper Potion
• Moomoo Milk
• Paralyz Heal
• X Attack
• X Defense
• X Sp. Def.
• Courage

The only difference was that Magneton was capable of doing me in with a well-timed Metal Sound + Thunderbolt combo which did happen only once. The tricky part was remembering not to switch out Aron and keeping her alive while maxing out her Attack and Defense stats to survive an Earthquake from Steelix. That whole effort took five minutes before feeling brave and taking down Magneton.

"Hoi! Break it up, the three of you!"

Amazing... it stood up to Earthquake! As for Bastiodon? Hardly a threat.

"Goes to show that the past isn't all that hot."

And we leave this chapter just in time for some vaudeville slapstick from our own, Barmy Barry. Take it away, Barms!

Gawd. Right out the front door and in my face and everything.

At least I got to control myself to somewhere this time.

For Muk's sake, you're standing right in front of me!!!

Groan, I knew it. It's a set up for exposition. Wake me up when nothing happens after I mash the A button.

"Whadder'ya shaying, shweethard?" James Stewart, eat your heart out.

Lucas has been quiet through all of this, but when he speaks, the Red Beret asskicking comes into effect. Naw, I'm aware that he wears a flatcap and not a beret. The hat, you see, is... tradition.

Well it's in the fan now... Galactic is winning.

You know what, throw yourself down there. People like Barmy are disgusting (why did I call him 'Vector?'), as if he treats stair climbing like a fricking Olympic sport.

It must be the world's weakest earthquake, because the bookshelves are still intact!

*cue lens wipe*

Oh, that Rowan. Always gets the last word in. Is that joke getting old yet? Is it, huh? IS IT?????!

Yeah, sure. Screw the lake guardians. They can take care of themselves.







Stats
Sinnoh Pokémon Faced - 131
National Pokémon Faced - NA
Resets - 11
Badges - 6
Technical errors - 2
Strong-a-grams - 50


Cokodora Conquerors

Closing Notes
A new chapter within a month this time. Now that's better. My pacing might still be out of touch by leaning towards ripping the piss out of the characters, but that's evolution for you.
The last three gyms and everything between really was a steep hill to climb. On the other hand, who knew - who bloody knew - that the battle items I dismissed for many years would come in handy for the purposes of a little challenge? They might mean little towards the Champion, but it's giving me lots of encouragement for further battles ahead.

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Chapter 11 - A Pain in the Alps

It's been five months. Let's get straight to it.



I'm going to ignore the usual throwaway spiel from Team Galaxy because it's not like I heard it a million times before.



'Wolf Ears' here was about to take a Saturn for the worse if Toxicroak was the best he got.

"Somebody call the Battletoads, cause you're gonna get zitzed, rashed, and pimpled out of town!"

Speaking of throwaway spiel, this idiot takes the bloody cake. He said that word I've always hated like eight times in quick succession:



I rest my case. He deserved to be startled. His TM sucked, anyway.



We've not yet reached the point where I needed a dozen HMs to navigate this world, but my nerves were already tested here. Bidoof couldn't learn Strength until it evolves to Bibarel. No big deal - it's going to happen soon.



Right, the story. Save the legendary lake guardians from token evil group. Time to give my Red Beret friend a hand. How could he lose?! Oh yeah, the story.





What about my rival, the unofficial star of the show? Forget him for now.

*continued*

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Hang a mo'... there was something I was supposed to be doing since the last chapter ended. It didn't sink in ye- oh, that's it!

I got so swept in by the story (if you can call it that) that I almost forgot about Iron Island after Canalave Gym, so here we go! I previously met Riley outside the cave last chapter, and here he was to play tagalong to make me feel good. He's just there to show off his Lucario and why we should worship the ground they walk on.

Well Riley, yes I do mind. The names are the wrong way around. That's the problem with double battles with friendly NPCs. They're just too easy. Instant healing? Pah. On the way, Riley shared some interesting dialogue with me:

Oh, tell me about it! This would have been funny if it wasn't so bloody true. He must be psychic. The mind reading kind, not the type.

"Don't ever try to second guess me again, you yoga yobbo!"

*continued*

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Strength is ready, by the way. Yay.

"Jessica Rabbit call-"

HOLD ON! Aron did not knock out Lopunny that time. It was Lucario the glory hound and his Force Palm that did her in. It sucked, but that's the rules. A KO can not come from the partner Pokémon in a double battle. The following exchange then occured:

Thanks a lot, bub. *grumble* Teacher's pet...
Oh yeah? You know what your problem is? Your aura stinks!
Shut up! *clonk*

Whatever happened next will be left to the reader's imagination. Or ask the Medicham that knocked out Lucario in the next battle.

"First, a chonky camel, and now an aquaphobic hippo? What a world!"

The next double trainer battle was nothing to be sneezed at, either.

This calls for a spit take.

Who in Lucifer's Action Replay gave Staraptor Close Combat????

I feel ashamed to record this.



(continued)

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Turned out the blue haired moptops were responsible for disturbing the Pokemon on the Island. Remember kids, flippant attitude like this will get you nowhere. After a brief battle that was not worth remembering, Riley rewarded me with an Egg. Straight to the PC it went.

On my way out, a wild Steelix! Huh, guess that makes the Metal Coat all but redundant, doesn't it?

And this working-class hero says something unprintable that will certainly get me banned on the forums.

With Strength, we chipped away at the glorious Mt. Coronet to explore Route 216 up north with lots of snow, and like always, the long awaited Ice Type Pokemon to catch so late into the game!

0w0 Wait for it! Here it comes...


(continued)

 

[SteCisGreendog]

>:[ Oh for crying out loud!

"How do you shake hands with those things?"

"Call that an upgrade? I call it an eyesore."

I don't get it. Where were the Ice types? Is all this snow just eye candy? I mean... they let anyone be a Pokémon trainer these days, too. I just don't get it...

Heck, I got snowblind inside the lodge.

"You may not have gotten much H2O, but you got a sound serving of steel!"

"This is as far back as I go - to laugh at you from a distance."



(continued)

 

[SteCisGreendog]

Well that's charming. Ace Trainers, everyone. *slow clap*

"Awww, did someone take your sleeping bag?"

Well, frost my yule log and call me Krampus! It's about time.

There goes another pointless cameo. Not a manga reader, so what do I care?

My memory fails me now, but the fight with Magmar was interesting, as much as I hate to say it! It may have been a trainer battle, because I mean really - a wild Fire type in the middle of a tundra would be fricking stupid. It had some hot moves that wound me up paralysed but in fact, it was that darn weather condition that wiped my solo. It that point I simply revived Aron and sent it back into the fray. Poor little bugger.

(continued)

 

[SteCisGreendog]

"It's all SNOVER for you, stumpy."

Breaking news: another HM was practically given to me with no effort. Another one for the Pokémon Swiss Army Knife variant.

So... I did something stupid and forgot to capture Swinub in battle, but really. You know what they look like.

"You sure have the nose for embarassment, don't you?"

Nerd humour. Gotta love it. I won't get into it here but they sure seem to like lumping Ghost specialists into the 'weird' crowd, which is simply not on in these modern times.

"Look, it's Cousin It's pet dog!"

"That'll teach you to lick frozen rocks, you frostbitten fox!"


(continued)