Fire Eagles Pokemon Adventure

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 1
When Fire Eagle woke up at 5:00 in the morning, he got up off of his bed, got his clothes from his closet, and went into the bathroom. When he was in the bathroom before he took his morning shower, he shaved his mustach and beard so he can be fresh and clean for Professor Oak.

After his shower, he went downstairs and went to the kitchen. In the kitchen he went and looked in the fridge to see if there was any milk left. There was milk left so he brought it out, opened the cubboard where the bowls were and poured himself a good bowl of cereal.

"Good morning mom." said Fire Eagle.
"Well good morning to you." said his mom. "Your in a good mood today."
"Yes I know, I want to be ready for Professor Oak to give me my first poke'mon." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle was done with his cereal so he put it away in the sink. He grabbed his backpack, kissed his mom, and opened the door. When he was outside, he grabbed his bike and headed to the pokemon lab.

When he was coming towards the pokemon lab, he saw Professor Oak waiting for him. When Fire Eagle was coming closer, Professor Oak had three pokeballs in his hands.

"What are those?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Well these are the three pokemon you are going to choose from." said Professor Oak.
"Oh, okay, well can I pick now?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Yes you can, but choose wisely though." said Professor Oak.

When Fire Eagle was slowly picking his pokemon, he chose Squirtle the water type pokemon. He was so excited that he just picked his starting pokemon so he suddenly hurried to begin his pokemon journey by jumping on his bike and biking towards the next town or city.

"Hey wait for a minute, I have to give you something." said Professor Oak.
"Oh yeah forgot." said Fire Eagle.
"Here, I had to give you this or else your not going to see the right information about the pokemon." said Professor Oak.
"What is it?" asked Fire Eagle.
"It's a pokedex, an encyclopedia that can transfer the data from the pokemon to the pokedex." said Professor Oak.

Fire Eagle grabbed the pokedex out of Professor Oaks hands and he headed onto his pokemon journey.

"Hey wait up." said Fire Eagles mom. "You forgot to kiss me another kiss before you go onto your pokemon adventure."
"Oh yeah I forgot." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle stopped his bike and turned it around so he can kiss his mom a goodbye.

"I'll miss you." said his mom.
"I'll miss you too." said Fire Eagle.
"Here I want you to take this watch what your dad gave me before he died last year." said his mom.

Fire Eagle grabbed the watch and put it on to see if it fits around his wrist. The watch was a little bit to big for him but Fire Eagle said that he'll fit in it. When his mom gave him a goodbye, Fire Eagle turned his bike around and biked towards route 1.

 

[bobandbill]

Hmm, I do think you need a bit more work on this... a few mistakes, and a few debateable 'issues' I had with it.

Chapter 1
When Fire Eagle woke up at 5:00 in the morning, he got up off of his bed, got his clothes from his closet, and went into the bathroom. When he was in the bathroom before he took his morning shower, he shaved his mustach and beard so he can be fresh and clean for Professor Oak.
Now, firstly... Fire Eagle? What kind of a name is this? Is this Pokemon with Indians? Not even the Orre region has names that weird, with the possible execption of Miror B (simialar to Mirror Ball...).
Mustach ain't quite right, and '5:00am' in the morning isn't much of a nesserary detail to have.

After his shower, he went downstairs and went to the kitchen. In the kitchen he went and looked in the fridge to see if there was any milk left. There was milk left so he brought it out, opened the cubboard where the bowls were and poured himself a good bowl of cereal.
Already feels a bit dull. So far - he woke up, he got clothes, he shaved, he went down some stairs, he looked for milk - gasp there be milk - he uses milk for breakfast.
But we don't know his age, or his appearance (save some facial hair), and the part with 'he looked for milk - he found some' really doesn't seem all that interesting.

"Good morning mom." said Fire Eagle.
"Well good morning to you." said his mom. "Your in a good mood today."
"Yes I know, I want to be ready for Professor Oak to give me my first poke'mon." said Fire Eagle.
Said said said. Use some other words there.
Secondly - if the part after the dialogue flows on from the dialogue, and the two parts can be treated as one sentence, use a comma over a full stop. In each instance here, comma over full stop.
Also, 'You're' over 'Your'.

Fire Eagle was done with his cereal so he put it away in the sink. He grabbed his backpack, kissed his mom, and opened the door. When he was outside, he grabbed his bike and headed to the pokemon lab.
Also, the pattern to sentences is similar. 'This happened. Than that happened'. or rather ' Fire Eagle did this. Then he did that. 'Blah blah' said mum. Fire eagle replied and did something else. Then he did this.'. See what I mean? Repatitive.
This can be partly fixed by changing the lentghs of the sentences. Have some longer than others, and do that by putting in description (of the house, 'Fire Eagle', etc), and detailing some other things. What about the mum - how will see feel about her son leaving? After this she is promtly forgotten, when you could add some more here such as emotions her thoughts, etc, to give a more interesting read than the finding of the milk.

When he was coming towards the pokemon lab, he saw Professor Oak waiting for him. When Fire Eagle was coming closer, Professor Oak had three pokeballs in his hands.
Always capitlise 'Pokemon' in every instance, generally. Pokemon and Pokeballs included.

"What are those?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Well these are the three pokemon you are going to choose from." said Professor Oak.
"Oh, okay, well can I pick now?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Yes you can, but choose wisely though." said Professor Oak.

Same thing with 'said', and also 'asked' (e.g. enquired, questioned), and the use of commas and other punctuation in dialogue - DarkPersian479's guide on the such is a good read for that, explains it well.
A comma after 'well' can also be used as a pause in speech.
When Fire Eagle was slowly picking his pokemon, he chose Squirtle the water type pokemon. He was so excited that he just picked his starting pokemon so he suddenly hurried to begin his pokemon journey by jumping on his bike and biking towards the next town or city.

'Slowly picking his Pokemon - but a second later, he chose it. If he was taking his time, why not show it more - have him look at the Pokemon - what are the other Pokemon?
What does Squritle look like as well? Pretend I haven't played Pokemon and describe it properly. People who've only played Diamond and Pearl may not even know Squritle. In short - more description!
'Next town or city' - wait, he doesn't know where he wants to go? I doubt this for a guy living in his region wouldn't know this, and he should have a plan on where he wants to go.


"Hey wait for a minute, I have to give you something." said Professor Oak.
"Oh yeah forgot." said Fire Eagle.
"Here, I had to give you this or else your not going to see the right information about the pokemon." said Professor Oak.
"What is it?" asked Fire Eagle.

"It's a pokedex, an encyclopedia that can transfer the data from the pokemon to the pokedex." said Professor Oak.
You're (you are) over your, again. Same mistakes again made, and generally this is somewhat generac, like the games/anime - give your story something else than the same happenings.

Fire Eagle grabbed the pokedex out of Professor Oaks hands and he headed onto his pokemon journey.
Wow, awfully nice to do for someone who gets a Pokemon and a device for a guy - a 'thank you' or something rather than 'yanking it off' and not a word of goodbye is more realistic.

"Hey wait up." said Fire Eagles mom. "You forgot to kiss me another kiss before you go onto your pokemon adventure."
"Oh yeah I forgot." said Fire Eagle.
Geez, 'Fire Eagle' forgets a heck of a lot, doesn't he? Fire Eagle's mum did come back - but still doesn't show emotion.
Fire Eagle stopped his bike and turned it around so he can kiss his mom a goodbye.

"I'll miss you." said his mom.
"I'll miss you too." said Fire Eagle.
"Here I want you to take this watch what your dad gave me before he died last year." said his mom.
And NO emotion here either? 'Here's a watch of my dead husband, son, who'll I'll never see again until you become the champion!' You could do a fair bit more than this.

Fire Eagle grabbed the watch and put it on to see if it fits around his wrist. The watch was a little bit to big for him but Fire Eagle said that he'll fit in it. When his mom gave him a goodbye, Fire Eagle turned his bike around and biked towards route 1.

Ok, a quick overview on things to improve on/fix:
Description - more! Only thing we know about Fire Eagle is that he has facial hair. Nothing on his age, stature, and so forth. And only thing on his personality is that he forgets a lot as well... other things such other characters, Squirtle and places also suffered from this. Put more with the dialogue, so we see how thinsg are being said as well.

Character reaction - unrealistic (yanking of Pokedex from kind professor who gave him a Pokemon to boot, and no reaction from him for that rude bit), or missing (mostly the mum, and news about the dead dad). Consider how someone would act to each piece of info you give, and add it in.

Characters - more personality - unless you intend Fire Eagle to be a impolite, forgetful guy... but more could be done, really. And, really, 'Fire eagle' - what name is that? I don't really have a liking to it...

Dialogue - less 'saids' and 'asked', and the punctuation thing.

Sentences - change the length up a bit, with more description and all.

Events - some wasn't nesserary - he woke up at 5:00 am (and didn't react to having to wake up in the dark, being sleepy or anything, may I add), and the milk part if another example - a bit pointless to say 'he looked for milk', and then tell us he found it.

It's better than some, but you have a lot of room for improvement. Dopn't get discouraged though by this review - I sometimes get harsh when I think it is neede.d Take these comments on board and spend time on improving this and the next chapter, and you will improve. Look at some of the better fics here to get a better idea as well. Don't give up, and good luck!

 

[Cynic Kaka]

..Will the watch turn him into Ben 10?

But seriously, this is cool! Keep it up!

 

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 2

When Fire Eagle was in route 1 biking along the grass, he saw a pidgey so he stopped and creeped towards it. The pidgey saw him and it flew away. Fire Eagle looked around to see where it was and then when he was about to go back on his bike, he saw it again.

This time Fire Eagle opened his backpack and threw a peice of apple to it. The Pidgey was eating the apple so he quickly grabbed a pokeball at it. The catch was unsuccessful so Fire Eagle got off of his bike again and went to get the pokeball.

Fire Eagle suddenly heard a noise right by him so he slowly turned around to see what it was and it was the same Pidgey that been impossible to catch for him. The Pidgey looked at him and it flew away not not quickly because he threw out Squirtle to go catch it.

"Squirtle go catch the Pidgey and use tackle." said Fire Eagle while he was pointing at the Pidgey.
"Squirtle." said Squirtle while he was running towards the Pidgey.

Pidgey was getting Fire Eagle made so he started chasing after it. A few munites of chasing, Fire Eagle was getting tired but Squirtle wasn't. When Squirtle used tackle on Pidgey, the Pidgey came crashing down towards the ground.

It was Fire Eagles chance so he grabbed a pokeball and threw it at Pidgey. When the catch was successful, Fire Eagle jumped so high that he was very excited that he caught his very first pokemon. Fire Eagle looked around and it started getting dark so he went back on his bike and and pedaled on.

A few minutes later, Fire Eagle was getting tired of pedaling and sleepy as well so he pedaled faster so he can find a house to sleep at. He couldn't find any place to sleep but he saw lights up ahead so he pedaled as fast as he could to see them further.

When he was pedaling he saw lights of buildings and houses so he slowed down so he wouldn't fall out of his bike. When he entered the city, there was a sign that said, "Welcome to Viridian City." After Fire Eagle read that, he quickly found a pokecenter.

When he arrived at the pokecenter, he chained up his bike and headed inside to sleep for the night. Inside the pokecenter, he didnt start sleeping right away, he first asked the nurse to heal his pokemon. While his pokemon was getting healed, he grabbed a pillow and put it on a bench.

"Here you go, your pokemon are okay and ready to battle again." said the nurse.
"Thanks alot but my pokemon arent going to battle untile tomorrow morning though but thanks anyways." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle grabbed his pokemon, put it in his belt, and laid down on the bench so he can sleep for the night.

 

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 3

When the sun rose from the horizon, Fire Eagle woke up and headed out of the pokecenter. When he stepped outside, he saw a boy trying to steal his bike so Fire Eagle walked up to him and pushed him on the ground.

"What are you doing with my bike?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Me, nothing, I was just looking at it." said the boy.
"Nope, I think you were about to steal it." said Fire Eagle.
"No I wasnt, want to battle for it?" asked the boy while grabbing out his pokeball.
"Alright, lets go then." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle grabbed out his pokeball and he brought out Squirtle.

"Squirtle huh? try this out." said the boy throwing the pokeball at the ground.

The pokeball opened and it came to be a Bulbasaur.

"Bulbasaur use tackle." said the boy.
"Squirtle dodge it and use tackle." said Fire Eagle.

Bulbasaur got knocked down right out of the air and it fell harshly.

"Squirtle use tackle again." said Fire Eagle.
"Bulbasaur used tackle while Squirtles coming at you." said the boy.

When Bulbasaur and Squirtle went head on, they fell right next to each other.

"Get up Bulbasaur and tackle his Squirtle, get up now." said the boy with an angry voice.
"Why are you forcing your pokemon to attack? Bulbasaur is trying to get up as well as my Squirtle." said Fire Eagle.
"Yeah so what?" asked the boy.
"So what? your going on the stage from a good pokemon trainer into a bad pokemon trainer and then when you become a bad trainer, your pokemon will leave you." said Fire Eagle.
"Whatever lets get the show on the road." said the boy.

Squirtle got up before Bulbasaur.

"Squirtle wait until Bulbasaur gets up and use tackle to finish him off." said Fire Eagle.
"Bulbasaur get up, get up now." said the boy with an angry voice again.
"Alright I win I guess because your Bulbasaur won't get up." said Fire Eagle.
"No not yet he's getting up." said the boy with a sad voice.

The boy was crying so he grabbed his Bulbasaur and put it back in its pokeball. Fire Eagle walked towards the boy and told him to get Bulbasaur to the pokecenter. In the pokecenter, Fire Eagle grabbed the pokeball and gave it to the nurse.

"Is my Bulbasaur going to be okay?" asked the boy.
"Yes it is, probably its sick or something." said Fire Eagle.
"Well I just got it today at Professor Oaks lab." said the boy.
"Alright then, lets just wait tell it gets healed." said Fire Eagle.

Later that day, the nurse came out with Bulbasaur okay and well. When the boy saw Bulbasaur he ran towards it and hugged it with all his heart.

"Sorry with the bad start." said the boy.
"Thats okay, whats your name?" asked Fire Eagle.
"My name is Aaron, whats yours?" asked Aaron.
"My name is Fire Eagle." said Fire Eagle.
"Thats a cool name, can I come with you on your journey?" asked Aaron.
"Sure you can, I can have a little company in my journey." said Fire Eagle.

After the conversation with each other, Aaron got on the back of Fire Eagles bike and Fire Eagle started biking towards the next town or city.

 

[The Confuzzler]

your certinaly getting better at writing. Keep writing and this will go far :)

 

[Scales]

Like it has been mentioned you need a tad more writing experience. A good way to learn is to read well known novels and participate in roleplays. You can also learn by participating in roleplays with already experienced writers.

Something I recommend is to read over your chapters before submitting them. It helps you add more discription. Try to read it from the perspective of an outsider. It can help you add more emotion to the story.

 

[Ninja Caterpie]

Kk... Dodgy... Always "the next tow or city' Maybe tell us WHERE he's going?
I mean it wouldn't hurt would it?
If Im being mean... then Im mean GRRRRR :) jokes.

In a Pokemon Center, I think they have rooms like a hotel free for trainers... If Im wrong tell me.

I'd say to try and make our sentences...er...I...dunno how to say it... :(
Well, the speech is slightly unrealistic...But Oh wells... Good work at least.

 

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 4

When Fire Eagle and Aaron was riding along route 2, they seen alot of pokemon so they stopped for a while to try and catch pokemon and train their own.

"Look there's a Rattata." said Aaron.
"Yeah I see it, why won't you catch it." said Fire Eagle.
"Alright, I'll try to catch it." said Aaron.
"Try battling it first and then catch it." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron brought out Bulbasaur and it looked ready to fight.

"Bulbasaur use tackle now." said Aaron.

When Aaron sent out Bulbasaur, the Rattata looked ready and focused and it used quick attack.

"Dodge it and use tackle from its side." said Aaron.

When Rattata was running towards Bulbasaur, Bulbasaur stepped back and hit Rattata straight on with its forehead. Rattata crashed hard but not hard enough so it got up and it used quick attack another time.

"Bulbasaur, dodge it again and hit it with another tackle." said Aaron.

Bulbasaur tried to dodge it but the Rattata was too quick. Bulbasaur kneeled down and concentrated on Rattata.

"Run towards it and use tackle." said Aaron.

When Bulbasaur was running towards Rattata, Rattata tried to dodge it but Bulbasaur was to presice about the attack. Rattata got knocked out and when Aaron had the chance, he grabbed a pokeball and threw it at Rattata.

The Rattata was caught and Aaron was happy.

"Now it's your turn." said Aaron.
"Alright then." said Fire Eagle. "I got to find a Pidgey."

Later on the day, Fire Eagle found a Pidgey so he threw out Squirtle and made it use tackle on Pidgey. Pidgey flew up high and it landed a big tackle right on Squirtle.

"Watch out Squirtle by watching Pidgeys moves." said Fire Eagle.

So Squirtle listened and watched Pidgeys moves by trying to catch it. When Pidgey flew to the right or left side, Squirtle ran with it.

"Squirtle, try attacking it with tackle when it stops flying." said Fire Eagle.

When Pidgey stopped, Squirtle started running towards it and when Squirtle caught it, Squirtle caught it with its hand and it used tackle right after.

"That's a good job." said Fire Eagle. "Now its time for a pokeball."

Fire Eagle grabbed out a pokeball and threw it at Pidgey. Pidgey was caught and both Aaron and Fire Eagle were happy.

"You sound like you fifteen." said Aaron. "Are you fifteen?"
"Nope, Im sixteen." said Fire Eagle. "How old are you?"
"Im ten." said Aaron. "Where do you live?"
"I live in Pallet Town, do you live there also?" said Fire Eagle.
"Yeah, my parents kicked me out because I always cause trouble at school." said Aaron.
"That's sad, anyways let's start going before it gets dark outside." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron got on the back of the bike and Fire Eagle got on and pedaled. Later on that day, Aaron found something on the ground up ahead so when Fire Eagle spotted it, he stopped the bike and Aaron picked it up.

"Its a map of the region." said Aaron.
"Yeah, were are we heading?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Were heading towards Viridian Forest." said Aaron.
"Cool, let's get wild in the forest than." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron laughed and Fire Eagle sped so he can catch more pokemon in the forest before it got dark out. It got dark and Fire Eagle stopped.

"Unzip my bag and bring out the flashlight." said Fire Eagle.
"Okay." said Aaron while he was unzipping Fire Eagles backpack.
"Do you got it?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Yeah." said Aaron.
"Alright lead a trail of light forward on the trail." said Fire Eagle.
"Okay got it." said Aaron.
"Okay lets go then." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle sped up more so he can get there before midnight. Later that night, Fire Eagle didnt see a stump that was in the way so they flew off the bike and landed in a bush.

"Ow that really hurts." said Fire Eagle.
"Yeah I guess so." said Aaron. "Where are we?"
"I don't know lets look around and see." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle and Aaron got up off of the ground and they looked around so they can know where they were.

"I think were inside the Viridian Forest." said Aaron.
"Yeah I guess so, theres alot of trees around here." said Fire Eagle.
"I'm scared of this place." said Aaron.
"Dont worry." said Fire Eagle. "Its just the darkness thats making it scary."

Fire Eagle grabbed the bike but it was too damaged.

"Oh forget it." said Fire Eagle.
"Forget what?" asked Aaron.
"The bike, its ruined and broke." said Fire Eagle.
"Well let's just find our own way out of here with the flashlight." said Aaron.
"Alright then, lets go." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle looked at the map and it read that the next area was route 3 and Pewter City.

"Next its route 3 and a Pewter City." said Fire Eagle.
"Okay, lets make it quick for I can rest up my legs from all of this walking." said Aaron.

Aaron and Fire Eagle was still walking around while they were looking for another place to get out.

 

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 6

"This is really quiet and scary." said Aaron.
"Yes I know, lets sit down for awhile." said Fire Eagle.

When they sat down on the grass, they suddenly heard a noise in the woods. The noise kept on getting louder and then they heard laughing. Fire Eagle got up and he looked around to see where the noise was coming from.

When Fire Eagle was looking in the woods, he saw a yellow tail moving up and down behind a bush. When Fire Eagle was walking further towards the bush, he saw another yellow tail. When he was looking at the two yellow tails, it came to be two Pikachus playing with each other.

"Look, come here and see what I found." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron got up from the grass and ran to Fire Eagle to see what was up.

"Those are Pikachus." said Aaron.
"Let's catch them." said Fire Eagle.
"Yeah but how, their fast." said Aaron.
"I don't know, chase that one of the left and Ill chase the one of the right." said Fire Eagle.
"Alright, on the count of three." said Aaron.
Okay, start." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron counted to three and the Pikachus ran different directions. When the Pikachus ran away, Fire Eagle and Aaron when an ran as fast as they could to catch them.

"Come over here." said Fire Eagle.

The Pikachu stopped and looked at Fire Eagle. Fire Eagle stopped and looked at Pikachu. The Pikachu glared at Fire Eagle and it used thudershock at him.

"Ouch that hurt you punk." said Fire Eagle.

Pikachu laughed and it started to run again. Later that same night, Fire Eagle kept on running trying to catch his Pikachu but when Fire Eagle ended up in a dead end, he stopped and looked around. Fire Eagle turned around and he saw the Pikachu grabbing a pokeball what he accidently dropped.

Fire Eagle kneeled down and looked at the Pikachu. Pikachu pushed the button that opens the pokeball and it went into the pokeball.

"Hey I got mine." said Fire Eagle.
"Thats good, Im trying to get mine, still." said Aaron.
"Alright Im going to help you." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle ran towards Aaron and looked around to see where the other Pikachu went. Fire Eagle went left and Aaron went with him. Later on, they both turned around and they saw the Pikachu looking at them.

"Come on Pikachu." said Aaron. "I want to catch you."
"Yeah Pikachu, come and travel with Aaron and I." said Fire Eagle.

Aaron looked at Pikachu and Pikachu grabbed Aarons jeans and tugged them around.

"Do you want to come with me now?" asked Aaron.

Aaron grabbed a pokeball and put it down on the ground. Pikachu looked at the pokeball and it went inside it.

"Finally we caught the stupid Pikachus." said Aaron.
"Yeah but their going to be great when we meet a water trainer because we still have to find the way out of here." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle and Aaron got out of the bushes and walked on the trail. It was about to be morning and Fire Eagle and Aaron was still walking in the Viridian Forest.

"Hey I found a sign." said Aaron.
"Yeah what does it say?" asked Fire Eagle.
"It says, Pewter City up ahead." said Aaron.
"Alright, lets run straight ahead to get out of here." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle and Aaron ran straight suddenly they saw an open field. They kept on running and then they got out of the forest.

"Oh yeah this is how I like it." said Fire Eagle "An open feild outside the forest.
"Yeah me too but you said that we have to keep heading forward until we see a pokecenter." said Aaron.
"Yeah youre right so lets keep on walking then." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle and Aaron saw lights turning on up ahead. They looked at the map to see where they were going and they were going to Pewter City.

"Welcome to Pewter City, the city of rock." said a man that was guarding the entrance of Pewter City.
"So were is the gym leader?" asked Fire Eagle.
"The gym leader, he is in the Pewter City Museum finishing up his night shift." said the man.
"Okay, can we get through?" asked Aaron.
"Yeah you sure can." said the man.

The man stepped away and Fire Eagle and Aaron kept on going until they saw a pokecenter. When they saw a pokecenter, they went inside to rest their pokemon and themselves for a while.

"Welcome to the Pewter City pokecenter, can I manage you a room to stay?" asked a young lady holding a pokeball in her backpack behind her.
"Yes you can." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle and Aaron walked with the young lady until they saw their room.

"Here you go your room." said the young lady.
"Thank you." said Aaron.
"Hold on, I'm going to ask this young lady something." said Fire Eagle.

Fire Eagle followed the lady and started to talk to her.

"Hey hows it going?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Its going good, how about you?" asked the lady.
"Its going good, me and my friend just walked in the scary Viridian Forest over the night." said Fire Eagle.
"That's sad." said the lady, "I wish I can go out for a pokemon journey."
"I saw a pokeball next to your bag there." said Fire Eagle.
"Yes it is one, its a Charmander." said the lady.
"A Charmander, that's amazing." said Fire Eagle, "I got a Squirtle."
"A Squirtle? that's so amazing, can we trade?" asked the lady.
"Sure we can." said Fire Eagle.

The young lady brought out her pokeball and Fire Eagle brought out his pokeball and they both traded.

"Here you go, a level 15 Charmander." said the young lady.
"Thanks, here is the level 13 Squirtle." said Fire Eagle.

After the trade, Aaron showed up.

"Hey what did I miss?" asked Aaron.
"Well you just missed a trade between me and the lady here." said Fire Eagle.
"Nice." said Aaron, "I need to heal my pokemon."
"You go do that and the lady and I will keep on talking." said Fire Eagle.

 

[F.E. DeWitt Jr.]

Chapter 7

"Can I come with you and your friend?" asked the young lady.
"Sure you can come with us." said Fire Eagle.
"Okay cool, I got to tell my mom if I can." said the young lady.

The yound lady gets up from the bench and asked her mom, the nurse of the pokecenter. When the young lady came back, she looked happy.

"I can go." said the young lady while she grabs her backpack.
"Okay cool lets go then." said Fire Eagle.
"Hey wait up, dont leave me." said Aaron while he runs to the others while they leave.

When they were outside, Fire Eagle was looking for the Pewter City Museum.

"Where is it?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Wheres what?" asked Aaron.
"Are you looking for the museum, its right over there." said the young lady.
"Okay cool thanks." said Fire Eagle, "Whats your name?"
"My name is Brooke." said the young lady.
"Nice to meet you Brooke, my name is Fire Eagle and this is Aaron." said Fire Eagle.

When Fire, Aaron, and Brooke were going to the museum, Fire Eagle accidently bumped into a man that was walking away from the museum.

"Watch it there guy." said the man who got bumped by Fire Eagle.
"Sorry about that." said Fire Eagle.
"Thats okay, my name is Brock, whats yours?" asked Brock.
My name is Fire Eagle and these are my friends Brooke and Aaron."
"Nice to meet them also, hey Im going to go inside the Pewter City gym, want to go with me?" asked Brock.
"Yeah sure, well come along with you." said Aaron.

So Fire Eagle and the gang went walking with Brock while when Brooke recognized Brock.

"I think thats the Pewter City gym leader." said Brooke.
"Why yes I am the gym leader." said Brock while he stops in his tracks.
"What, you are the gym leader?" asked Fire Eagle.
"Did I studder, I am the gym leader." said Brock. "Here we are my pokemon gym, the rest of you can watch while the first challenger battles with me."
"Alright, I'll challenge you said." Aaron.
"Alright okay then, lets go inside." said Brock.

Brock opened the doors to his gym and inside there was rocks everywhere on the ground.

"Alright, the rules are two pokemon each and the winner gets the badge and the loser loses with no offer applied." said Brock.
"Okay got it, lets do this." said Aaron.
"Go Geodude." said Brock.
"Go Bulbasaur." said Aaron. "Use tackle."
"Use tackle on Bulbasaur." said Brock.

When Bulbasaur and Geodude went head on, Bulbasaur got hit first and Geodude didnt get hit hardly.

"Use your leech seed attack." Fire Eagle said to Aaron.
"Why use leech seed, it just absorbs Geodudes health." said Aaron.
"Yes, use it to do that for you can get an advantage." Fire Eagle said to Aaron.
"Okay enough talk, lets battle." said Brock.

Aaron paid attention to Brock instead of Fire Eagle.

"Use leech seed Bulbasaur." said Aaron.
"Alright Geodude use tackle." said Brock.

When Geodude rolled towards Bulbasaur, Bulbasaur spurted out seeds and they landed on Geodude. Later on, Geodude still hit Bulbasaur but Bulbasaur gained health back from leech seeds effect.

"Alright Geodude use tackle again to end his Bulbasaur." said Brock.
"Alright, well see if you end my Bulbasaur, go and use vine whip on Geodude." said Aaron to Bulbasaur.

When Geodude was rolling towards Bulbasaur, Bulbasaur took out two vines and whipped them at Geodude. When Bulbasaur used vine whip, it blocked Geodudes attack.

"Alright Geodude use defense curl and use tackle on Bulbasaur." said Brock.
"Okay Bulbasaur end Geodude by using vine whip." said Aaron to his Bulbasaur.

Geodude used defense curl but it didnt have enough time to use tackle on Bulbasaur because Bulbasaur attacked Geodude with another vine whip.

"No Geodude." exclaimed Brock while Geodude took his last hit by Bulbasaur. "Okay you took out my Geodude, let's see if you take out my Onix."

When Onix came out, Bulbasaur looked at it and Bulbasaur didnt matter if Onix was giant or small, hell take it out easy.

"Use vine whip Bulbasaur." said Aaron.
"Alright Onix use tackle now." said Brock.

Onix raised its head back and threw it down at Bulbasaur but Bulbasaur dodged it and used vine whip. When Onix hit the ground hard it got right back up without a scratch on its body.

"Alright Bulbasaur use vine whip again." said Aaron.
"Okay Onix, squeeze Bulbasaurs vines out with bind." said Onix.

Onix lifted its tail and tightend it around Bulbasaur. Brock laughed at Aaron because his Bulbasaur was getting squeezed by Onix.

"Alright, you want to play the hard games right, Ill give you hard games to play, use leech seed Bulbasaur." said Aaron.
"Keep on holding Onix." said Brock.

Bulbasaur spurted out seeds to lay on Onix but Onix kept on squeezing Bulbasaur. Onixs health got absorbed and it went to Bulbasaur.

"When are you getting enough?" asked Brock towards Aaron.
"Never." said Aaron.
"Okay Onix stop." said Brock, "Use tackle."
"Bad choice Brock, use vine whip Bulbasaur." said Aaron.

Bulbasaurs vines went towards Onix and they hit it on its head so hard that Onix went down crashing onto the ground hard.

"No." exclaimed Brock, "You win, you deserve the boulderbadge from me."
"Yes, I won my first badge." exclaimed Aaron while jumping.
"Here take this with you also." said Brock. "I have three so you can all have one."

Brock handed Aaron, Fire Eagle, and Brooke a metal coat.

"Use that on an Onix you catch later on in your journeys because it can do you good." said Brock.
"Thanks for the item." said Aaron.
"Your welcome, whos next to battle me?" asked Brock.
"I am next." said Fire Eagle.

 

[Ninja Caterpie]

Uh...Hello? Aren't you gonna reply to anyone?
Or will you just keep posting chaps?
Expression. Simple as Shift 1 or Shift /
......
Uh...would you speak like this?

"Alright, you want to play the hard games right, Ill give you hard games to play, use leech seed Bulbasaur."

I sure wouldn't!
I'd say...
"Alright, you want to play hard games? I'll give you hard games to play! Use Leech Seed Bulbasaur!"