You will die because, one day, while skydiving, you were... well, skydiving, and you got hit by a plane that Jordan was recklessly driving, and then you fell down to the ground, and except, you didnt land on the ground, you instead landed in the ocean, and a shark ate you, but you see this shark hasnt any teeth.
So a day later, while being digested, you got crapped out, and then some old man with a gotee came down and saved you, and he croaked, and so you swam to the ocean shore and this one crab gave you this pickle, you see, and well you see this pickle was a very poisonous pickle. And so you got sick.
A week later in the hospital, while getting stabbed with all kinds of needles, you woke up and there was some old lady holding a drill bit and stuff in one hand, and a butcher knife in the other. But fortunetly for you, she started puking up bananaz, and so she died, but tradgecally the knife fell out of her hand, and it stabbed you... but this was not the cause of your death. You see, it stabbed your foot, and the doc said your foot didnt matter so they cut it off...
Then the next day you were walking about and these sk8ers came along singing "Splish Splash! Takin a bath!" and they bumped into you, and you just died.... or so they th0ught...
Anyway, you actually died because everyone thought you were dead...
...and so they will creamate ya alive =(((((((
Actually thats probably a little farfetched... it'll probably just be like... a surprise attack by Casty while you slumber or something... i dunno