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If Pokémon even remotely made sense . . .

Ineffable~

DAT SNARKITUDE
    • 2,738
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    16
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    In this thread we list off the many silly frivolities of the Pokémon World. It is rather simple, for example:

    "If Pokémon were logical, we wouldn't have yellow sheep constructing magical screens of light."
    "If the Pokémon World weren't so preposterous, we wouldn't have singing pink balls with curly hair everywhere."

    Start your sentence with something like "If Pokémon were logical" and proceed to say something that definitely wouldn't happen in real life that does happen in the Pokémon world.
    I'll start us off!



    If Pokémon even remotely made sense, there wouldn't be fish that turn into octopuses and then start breathing fire.
     
    If Pokémon were logical we wouldn't be shoving CDs into Pokémon's heads to teach them how to throw floating rocks into the air.
     
    if pokemon were logical,ten year olds wouldn't be dropping out of school to play with monsters :P
     
    If pokemon were logical, everybody would be dead because they eat no food.
     
    If Pokémon were logical, that one Rocket in Gold Version would be dead from Lance's Dragonite's Hyper Beam.
     
    If pokemon were logical, you wouldn't be able to fly on a small pigeon
     
    If Pokémon were logical we wouldn't have tiny graceful half-bee half-snakes and yellow three-eyed stars running around making things flinch.

    If Pokémon weren't so preposterous, Fresh Water would diminish a Fire-type's HP.

    Hybrid Theory said:
    If pokemon were logical, you wouldn't be able to fly on a small pigeon
    Click to expand...
    Spoiler:
     
    If pokemon were logical, the pokemon would be crushed to death upon entering a pokeball
     
    If Pokémon made any kind of rational sense, us humans would be the ones captured in the Huma Balls, not the other way around. I mean, seriously, a good majority of Pokémon could deal a tonne of pain to the average Joe or Jane. Even Weedle could give you a taste of some deadly poison!
     
    If Pokémon weren't so massively ludicrous in every single way, Vulpix wouldn't be able to sit on the grass without setting it on fire. -Points to avatar-
     
    If Pokémon were logical, Ash would either be in his twenties or a charred, electrocuted corpse somewhere in Kanto.
     
    If Pokémon even remotely made sense, Jessie and James would have died a long time ago from shooting off into the sky repeatedly.
     
    If Pokémon made sense, very slow Pokémon wouldn't be able to run at such a blinding speed that there appear to be several copies of it.
     
    If pokemon made sense then little animals wouldn't pack such a punch unless you give them a weapon. And why give a pokemon a weapon when you could use it yourself? It would turn out to be a war-filled country where people shoot each other if they lock eyes, chainsaw each other in battle, lots of blood and gore. Thank goodness pokemon isn't logical. o.o
     
    If Pokémon were logical, a mean look would only be more likely to make the opponent want to flee.
     
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