Internet vs. reality

They recently did a study showing that if you talk to your mother over an IM client or text, you have no reaction to her words, but if you talk to her over the phone it's major stress relief. Just putting that out there.

There are levels of internet friends. For example, I've had friends in the past that I would IM while I was online, text while I was offline, and have voice conversations with video over Skype with regularly. That, to me, is not an 'internet friend', it's just a long-distance friend. But there are also friends that, for example, I only VM on PC. To me that's just an internet acquaintance; I can't tell you what that person is actually like in my experience because I know people are different online oftentimes. I myself fall victim to that, I'm the confident type online and friendly and outgoing but offline I'm very shy and quiet and tend to blend into the background.

So, I feel to transfer an internet friend into something more permanent, something like a Skype call or a phone conversation needs to happen so you can see how that person interacts in real time, when not behind a computer that they can use to think about replies and not be honest about who they are.
 
I think of internet friends more as long distance friends than internet friends. They're friends, but I just so happened to meet on the internet. They're very real, but internet friendships are really hard for me because they feel very temporary. You can lose them at any time. At any moment, they can choose not to log in. I've had some of my internet friends decide to do that in the past, and because of that, we lost contact immediately. It's hard because you can't really blame them. You can't say to yourself "Oh, how dare he not log in and talk to me! How dare he decide to leave this forum!" We're all going to do that some day. We're all going to move on in life, and unless you have other means of communicating with them, they're gone.

That said, I prefer most of my internet friends to my offline friends, but I would prefer to have all of my internet friends offline. By that I mean, I wish that I knew them offline and we could hang out regularly and do things like go to the movies, go out to eat, and go to the mall together. I always find myself wishing that. I have a really hard time having internet friends, because I eventually get to a point where I want to no longer be confined to talking to them on MSN. I want to text them, I want to call them, I want to Skype. I feel a lot closer to them that way, because that's what I do with my offline friends, so it starts to feel like I know them offline.

You think of texting an internet friend differently than texting an offline friend when you first get their number and start texting that way. It kind of feels like you're texting a really strong crush you have that has built up over the years; it feels special. There's just something about moving it offline that makes it stand out to me.
 
Juicy said:
I think the thing that makes it easier is that people are more seperated into their interests (ie Pokemon forums have people that like Pokemon and generally video games and what not). People in University and school are the people that make up the internet though and while they might be spread out there are loads of people with similiar interests the difference is you've gotta get to know them before you discover them.
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... honestly i was going to reply, but i can't really think of much else to say than ''i know right?!''
i'm sure there's a lot of people here who share interests, i won't doubt that. all that's left is to find them, i guess. that's exactly where the internet is so useful though. everyone is basically already 'categorized' for your convenience. XD;

Juicy said:
I find the major difference between school/work/anywhere you frequent is that on the internet it's a lot easier to avoid someone if you screw up...
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as for that.. i never really thought about it that way, but i guess that's also true. XD;


and as for all the other comments i didn't quote now.. i guess it makes sense that a conversation in person makes everything feel more 'real' than IM or text, simply because you - this may sound stupid - get to use more of your senses when speaking? just reading the text a person typed doesn't give you any feedback about what that person is feeling at the time, after all. in person, there's facial expressions, body language and even on the phone, it's not hard to hear what kind of mood the other person's in by hearing them talking.

in that sense, i guess it is a good way to distinguish between 'internet friends' and 'long-distance friends' too; the 'internet friends' being the ones you contact only through text/IM/VM/etc. obviously... which also makes them the most temporary.
those can still avoid you when they screw up, after all. XD;

welllllll that's enough ranting for now
 
I usually keep a certain distance from online friends because in my experience people are completely different in person. It's disappointing when you meet them and they're totally weird IRL. This has happened to me a couple of times, although I did meet this one awesome guy on the internet.
 
I only have a select few friends on the internet. I only count two or three people on PC as friends and on Facebook I only add people I know. I also had "friends" on YouTube (VainAttempts, is my name) but I trolled them and hacked them and instantly they quit the internet.

Most of my friends I have are in real life. My friends are the most wonderful people I could ever meet.
 
I'll start by answering why I believe that people are wary over the internet; especially parents I have noticed are extremely skeptical about their children's online usage. I think this could come from (I think because I am not a parent, and do not plan to become one in all honesty) the fact that not many older parents used the internet, but for those younger ones that do use it, it seems to hurt their relationships at times.

Personally though, the internet is what made my relationship. I met my fiance on a Naruto forum and we've been together for some time now. Not only that, but he's changing school districts to go to college with me in North Carolina (He lives in New York currently) So positives and negatives of internet? I suppose people could consider not being about to physically be there is a negative, but I would disagree. Loving someone takes a lot more than physical action, that goes for lovers and friends.

A positive about someone in person would be the physical aspect, but honestly most of my friends ARE online. Most people I've met in person have been full of themselves, not serious about anything, a *****, or something stupid. I'm pretty sure it's just because of the area I live in, and if I were to finally escape this place (Which I will once I get my degree in teaching, along with my fiance) I may find some more open-minded people. Though I seek these people on the internet, for my home town isn't very diverse. They're mainly close-minded, Christian, Country/Hickish, people. I have nothing wrong with someone having a belief, but when there is no tolerance for one another it pushes me over the edge.

The topic is called "Internet vs. Reality" So I guess I should say which I believe is better.

At this time in my life I would say internet, but once things get settled then of course reality. Though I do not believe having an internet life or hobby is bad at all, unless you are satisfied with your life, then I believe that you shouldn't spend hour upon hour neglecting your college work/ job or your family.
 
I learned a lot growing up on a computer, for better and worse. It was the best decision of my life to get onto here and other certain websites, however. I grew mature, met people with my common interests, etc. I can see why people disapprove of the internet certainly, but I'm very happy to have spent some time on here.

Personally, I can't think of internet friends and rl friends the exact same way, but I have found some amazing people here and I would hate to leave them in the dark. Some of them really do mean a lot to me as well, even more than certain individuals in RL.
 
-Grayscale- said:
I learned a lot growing up on a computer, for better and worse. It was the best decision of my life to get onto here and other certain websites, however. I grew mature, met people with my common interests, etc. I can see why people disapprove of the internet certainly, but I'm very happy to have spent some time on here.

Personally, I can't think of internet friends and rl friends the exact same way, but I have found some amazing people here and I would hate to leave them in the dark. Some of them really do mean a lot to me as well, even more than certain individuals in RL.
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I like what you say about how much you care about them, because I too believe you can create a very strong bond as I stated in my previous post.

Though I also must say I would think of my friends in RL and my friends on the internet in the same way. I just have different care and concern for each one.
 
well id say i dont have many internet friends actually :P im not a big fan of that now and i preffer spending time doing something else :P
 
Well I met my fiance online (Haguri who posted above) so I may be a bit biased but I find that online connections are just as real as any. Sure you can't hear them or see them unless you use cams but to me that can just prove the connection is that much more real. The fact that two people can just talk for however long is proof of some connection.

I believe that having been with my fiance this long with such little physical contact has in a sense brought us together because it has made things tougher but getting through that really has prepared us to take on issues together. The struggle has proven our devotion and I haven't a doubt that she and I can take on anything together.

So I believe online relationships are just as real as any other.
 
Kajini said:
Well I met my fiance online (Haguri who posted above) so I may be a bit biased but I find that online connections are just as real as any. Sure you can't hear them or see them unless you use cams but to me that can just prove the connection is that much more real. The fact that two people can just talk for however long is proof of some connection.

I believe that having been with my fiance this long with such little physical contact has in a sense brought us together because it has made things tougher but getting through that really has prepared us to take on issues together. The struggle has proven our devotion and I haven't a doubt that she and I can take on anything together.

So I believe online relationships are just as real as any other.
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I totally agree with you. Mostly because I also met my ex-fiancee online. And don't say that's wrong because I'm so young.
But the downside of talking to someone on the internet is you can't spend
real time with them. But for some reason, talking online makes you spill more about yourself. Sometimes good, sometimes bad.

But then of course, there are a lot of creepers on the internet, but you can just block those XD
 
Standard internet friends can be seen as standard RL friends; those people you only see every so often and like but don't talk to that much.

Now-a-days, for me, the realms of RL friends and internet friends are the same really. Granted, I will always have a better friendship with people I see in RL, but that doesn't take away from the fact that my online friends are still amazing people and I am close with them.​
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MisterCotton said:
In my opinion, some certain people on the Internet are more annoying than people in real life.
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Exactly.
People on the Internet are always trying to be the best, and most of the time, they fail.
 
You can have friends on the net, no problem. The difference, however, is that on the Internet, you can change usernames, and that gives you a whole different identity. In real life, you may lose contact with a friend, but should you cross paths, you are going to recognize each other! But on the internet, you could cross paths with someone you were good friend with and not recognize him, just because he has a different username. But also, chances are that if you meet someone with the exact username, it's just going to be someone else that thought of this name.

That's why I believe Internet friends cannot be true friends.
 
If there was more of a visual component to online life, then maybe. The problem is that the internet is an imitation of the real thing, it simulates real world socializing. Nothing you do here, or on facebook, or skype, or Twitter can truly mimic or equal face to face interactions.
 
When you're talking to someone online, you can connect with someone thousands of miles away, which is so cool. But it's not very realistic, or humanistic in any way.
Meanwhile, with talking with someone in person, you feel like you can emotionally connect with them WAY more, especially if it's someone that you feel intimate about.
 
Online and offline friendships are, the way I see them, incomparable. In an online friendship you can get very close to people but all you're really able to do while you're separated is talk with each other and as nice as that is, I don't think it makes up for the lack of physical contact and interaction you've got offline. There are simply physical barriers there in an online friendship which makes it really difficult to understand the personality of whoever you're talking to. They can describe themselves and you can get an impression of them, but what are they really like? Are they quiet? Loud? Involved? Distant? These are questions which can't easily be answered in an online friendship.

I do think, though, that online friendships have huge benefits. I personally find it much easier to talk to people online about issues which really bother me. Maybe it's the fact that they're not there in person, or that you can easily walk away from an online friendship at any time, that makes it easier. I don't really know, but it just is for me lol.
 
Live_Wire466 said:
If there was more of a visual component to online life, then maybe. The problem is that the internet is an imitation of the real thing, it simulates real world socializing. Nothing you do here, or on facebook, or skype, or Twitter can truly mimic or equal face to face interactions.
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I don't see why. I can convey the same meanings online as I can offline. Maybe people who can't express themselves well in words might think differently, but I see no reason why online interactions are inferior to offline ones.
 
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