I was walking with some girl that was my friend, who she was i'unno. So, this guy hits me in the face with a football, and I walked up to him and said, "I think you dropped this." He just got all mad and as I walked away, he hit me again. So, I walked back, and gave it to him again, and said that footballs sure are slippery. So, I walked back to this "girl" and he hit her in the face with it. Soez, I grabbezd it, and handed it to himz nad told him that if he hit her again he wuz gon' have som' probl3ms wit' diz person. He grabbed me as I walked away and slit the back of my neck with a knife, and told me he was going to kill me. So, I went to the bathroom, and I saw someone walk in as I was washing my hands, and I grabbed the edges of the sink, and jumped up, and slammed him into a stall with my feet. He was all, "d00d, i'm nockd outz!!11" So, I went to the principle, and told him that this guy tried to kill me, and the principle told me he didn't care. So, I left. I called teh poLeace and said, "d00d, som guy jus treid to kiil me." So, they came and took the kid away and stuffz, so there was leik an assembly at meh school, and teh d00d that doez stuff told me to come up and tell teh sch00l why I wus all beat up and stuffs. So, I told them, and then all the people that call me Klippy at meh school were all, "d00d, Klippy rules!" And, then people chanted meh nickname for 2 seconds, I told them not tooz. I said the guys friends would end up killin' me for getting him sent to jail for attempted murder and stuff. So, everyone was all scared and stuff. Then, I sat down, and these guys grabbed me and my chair and tied me up, and they leik, killed all the adults and stuffz. Then, they yelled at me, and they said I could tell teh p30ple in teh schol won mor phing. So, I toldz some girl I didn't know that I lovd her or something, and the guys shot me with teh gunz, and I was all...dead and stuff. then, they suicided by typing 'kill' in teh consol. lawl. then, som gurl ran up to meh dead bodeh and kissed meh dead lips. And, I was all alive again, and saiz, "d00d, I'd never leave you, d00d." to teh grl. She was all hapie and stuf. So, then, leik it was graduation for leik senior yeur. And, we got married 'nd stuff. it was cool, cause d00d she was smokn hot, so I was marid to a smokn chic, lawl. and, uh, then I was all old and stuff, and I guess I died again or something, it was crazzzzzy.
