Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted [V.2] [shh, no tears now, only dreams]

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Granted, it corrupts your 3ds
I wish I was a cabbage
 
Granted, but now Ash only cares about girls and not Pokémon.

I wish Misty was back in the anime.
 
granted but now she is the main protagonist and ash is the side character

I wish my laptop could transform into a ps3
 
Granted, however the whole world is invisible as well.

I wish I could control the elements. ^_^
 
Done, but now the Fire Nation wants to capture you.

I wish Captain Planet lived in the real world.
 
granted but due to an airplanes huge weight they fall adn crash lol

I wish rpgs where you can actually go in them(sword art online) were real
 
Granted, but now they rot faster.

I wish the Colossal Titan existed in the real world.
 
granted but he goes crazy and destroys washington dc(lol buh bye obama)

I wish I wasnt lazy
 
Granted, but now Kirito needs your help to save this new RPG world.

I wish Eevee had a flying type evolution.
 
Granted, but it's actually weaker than its pre-evolution.

(I'd still obtain it though)

I wish I could control time.
 
granted. you lose control of your godly powrers and accidently resets time itself

I wish I could print my own money
 
Done, but now Benjamin Franklin is mad with all of us.

I wish we didn't have to go to school.
 
Granted, but Pikachu had only 1 ears and two tails.

I wish there are no ocean.

You're wish is my command, koff~

Your wish is granted. Much to your horror, you realize that your wish doomed the entire planet to slowly rot. As there are no Oceans, there are no water ways. Lakes dry up, underground reservoirs seize and no longer provide water, but sand. Earth's ecosystem is turned on it's head. Animals that require less water fare better than those that rely on it to survive. Plants wither into dust and blow away. The smell of decay is heavy in the air. Dead bodies fill the streets and dehydrated animals scamper about. The beating sun crisps and blackens the dead. As you lay dying on your porch, you lick your lips with your dry tongue one last time before succumbing to death. In the back of your dying mind, you hear the laughter of thirsting gods. It will be less than 100 years before the Earth looks like Mars. I'm so glad I could grant your wish, master.

I wish I owned a real Koffing, koffi~
 
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