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My Book of Poetry

Persona

Banned
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    19
    Years
    Alright, I decided to make a thread of where I can just post my poems in one place rather than make countless threads for them. Please comment, and I hope that Ozy posts here. He's really good at pointing out of what I need to work on.

    Star Light, Star Bright:
    Heart,
    won't you lasso the moon,
    kiss the prayer infested sky,
    and forgive the stars
    for shining so bright,
    it's not their fault
    you keep asking for foolish pride...

    Wish a new wish for life
    and grant your dreams
    a reason to believe in reverie,
    furnish your soul with hope
    and faith shall bestow
    your shark bitten heart...

    Might it be a lover
    echoing sweet balladry
    with a beat that compliments
    your own unique melody;
    or a ratty old coffee cup
    to console your icy cold fingers
    into a poem of majestic quality,
    whispering humanity rests
    behind the pathetic words
    of this so called prose...

    Desires can be found
    in four leaf clovers,
    friends and sometimes even mothers,
    behind the arms of time,
    and dusty old bibles
    sworn on by sinners crimes,
    so latch on to your preference
    and do your heartstrings right
    wish a crucial wish, tonight...
    _____________________________

    My Mother:​
    I look back on these years
    To see how far I've come and grown,
    I take a trip down memory lane,
    And what I see has shown ...

    That every step I've taken,
    You have been there by my side ...
    From infancy to being a teen,
    We've stood the test of time.

    You cradled me and nurtured me,
    Through all these many years;
    You held me and did comfort me,
    Through happiness and tears.

    You'd pick me up when I would fall,
    You'd dust me off and then,
    Encourage me to get back on
    That horse and ride again.

    Your constant care and loving,
    And your warm inviting heart,
    Has always been a treasure that
    I knew would n'er depart.

    If I could be "just half" the person
    You have been to me ...
    Then you have taught me well dear mom,
    For in my heart I see ...

    A woman whose most gentle soul,
    Embraces me each day ...
    A woman whom I dearly love,
    Much more than words can say.​

    ^ I made that one for Mothers day if you wondered why I posted it. I'll post a few more when I think of ideas. Thanks for reading ^^
     
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    Those are nice poems, I wonder where you get your ideas form? I like the mother one the most
     
    ~*Conor*~ said:
    Those are nice poems, I wonder where you get your ideas form? I like the mother one the most
    Click to expand...

    Thanks bro. It depends, when you want to make a poem about nature, think of the earth and its living things. I guess I just try to dig deeper on my topic to get ideas.
     
    Ah, so Mr. Roy Mustang does pick up the pen to write as well. Unfortunately, poetry is perhaps one of Naminé's many great weak points, so therefore she will have to refrain from commenting as she is certainly, inferior to the other poets who can give any true advice here. However, if Mr. Roy Mustang have wrote any stories, she'll love to glance over them at the very least. If it is a fanfic and it includes canons that she is familiar with, why she'll love to spend the time to slowly read over them as well~
     
    Naminé said:
    Ah, so Mr. Roy Mustang does pick up the pen to write as well. Unfortunately, poetry is perhaps one of Naminé's many great weak points, so therefore she will have to refrain from commenting as she is certainly, inferior to the other poets who can give any true advice here. However, if Mr. Roy Mustang have wrote any stories, she'll love to glance over them at the very least. If it is a fanfic and it includes canons that she is familiar with, why she'll love to spend the time to slowly read over them as well~
    Click to expand...

    I'm sorry Naminé, I don't really write stories. But, I could try. Thanks for commenting. Even though it wasn't entirely about my poems, it still means that you did take the time to read them.
     
    Those were really good and that mothers day one was so sweet Ryan^___^ If I gave something like that to my mom she would be crying her eyes out!! Great job and can't wait to read more when you write them^^
     
    Hehe they are really good poems. Maybe I should make a poetry thread for myself too...
     
    Way to go!
    Great poems , make some more . I'm really looking forward for it . ^ - ^
     
    Thanks for the comments. I have a new one, hopefully I'll get as much comments as before ^^

    As Long As Your're Gone:​
    You're still sleeping,
    I'm waiting for it to end,
    But for as long as you're gone,
    My heart will never mend.

    You're resting your head,
    But no dreams haunt you,
    I'm counting the years,
    Pushing on through.

    You're holding your hands,
    So still together,
    Six years you have been gone,
    And it feels like it's been forever.

    No tears will fall from your eyes,
    I'm still trying to understand,
    But my tears are falling,
    And I still find it hard sometimes to stand.

    I'm finding it unfair,
    Still after all these years,
    My heart is still bleeding,
    I'm still wishing away my fears.

    I still need you here,
    I'm holding a picture of you,
    You're my beautiful angel,
    Moving on is all I can do.

    It still hurts deeply,
    It still feels so wrong,
    This is tearing me apart,
    Like it has been since you have been gone.

    I'm singing a song about you,
    Wishing I could hold you so tight,
    I'm wishing you were here,
    So everything could be all right.

    But you're still sleeping,
    I'm still waiting for it to end,
    But for as long as you're gone,
    My heart will never mend.​
     
    Dang. Never knew you wrote poetry, my man. That is most definately some awesome work though. The one about your mom sent shivers down my spine. o.O Star light, star bright is really good. It filled my mind with some wild, vivid images. The last one is really good as well. Great love poetry. XD Don't know what to criticise, really. Phenomenal work. Keep it up, bro. The Poetry section needs more of this.
     
    megafuz said:
    Dang. Never knew you wrote poetry, my man. That is most definately some awesome work though. The one about your mom sent shivers down my spine. o.O Star light, star bright is really good. It filled my mind with some wild, vivid images. The last one is really good as well. Great love poetry. XD Don't know what to criticise, really. Phenomenal work. Keep it up, bro. The Poetry section needs more of this.
    Click to expand...

    Thanks megafuz, I'm really honored of what you said in the end of your post.
     
    ;; WOW that was excellent, Ryan^^ your poetry is amazing and very well written! Keep it up^^
     
    *Princess Seraphia* said:
    ;; WOW that was excellent, Ryan^^ your poetry is amazing and very well written! Keep it up^^
    Click to expand...

    Thank you ^^

    I don't know when I'll start my next one, I still have to get ideas.
     
    OMG! They're great! ^_^
    I seriously don't see anything wrong with them.
    (even though I read them super fast XD)
    Keep up the good work!
     
    Midori Chi said:
    OMG! They're great! ^_^
    I seriously don't see anything wrong with them.
    (even though I read them super fast XD)
    Keep up the good work!
    Click to expand...

    Thanks Midori. Though, there has to be some things wrong. Not anything is perfect. ^^

    A Sign:
    Something clear to see
    But invisible to you and me
    Something strong to grab hold of
    But the eye can not see

    It stands in front of them
    But they are to blind to see
    Open your eyes
    Don't be a fool
    Why can't you see
    It's standing right in front of you

    The truth is being shown to you
    Grab hold of it take it by the hand
    It might not come again
    Show it to the ones that care
    There is where its dreams come true

    But only if you see
    The truth within me
    So open your eyes
    Look inside
    See the truth
    See whats meant to be

    People all around
    Unable to see
    People all around
    Blind to what they see

    People are hurting inside
    People are invisible
    People are forgotten
    People are alone

    Never noticed
    Never seen
    Never heard
    Never spoken
    Never whispered
    Never wished

    Always forgotten
    Their lonely life
    Nobody can see
    Waiting for a sign from above
    To set them free​
     
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    That's a sad poem ;; but also very good^^ once again keep up the great work, your poems are awesome^_________^
     
    Great stuff, I like your poems Ryan ='D You're awesome at them ^^;
     
    That was indeed a rather sad poem, but lacking in your previous vocabulary. And that was one of the things I deeply admired about your first few poems. I admit that my vocabulary gets repetative when I don't consiously think about finding synonyms to substitute for things like "blade", "love", and "hurt".

    Your weak work in the above poem was "eyes". You used it a lot and it started to lose it's initial impact. I realize that most people don't notice things like that when they read a poem, but I pride myself on decent poetry and being able to recognize the good.

    I greatly appreciate the fact that you have a grasp on grammar. And spelling. And punctuation. Those are wonderful things that make my life much more enjoyable!!

    My suggestions are thus -- keep working to make your poetry taste wonderfully by using words sparingly and mixing it up frequently. Keep up the nice flows and rhythms. I look forward to seein more!

    *inserts catch-phrase* Keep up the good work!
     
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