Parents keep child’s gender under wraps

[Flashmeteor]

We are living in a society today where everyone wants to be unique and different, yet everyone wants to be equal. Different and equal just can't be together. Despite what people say, everyone is NOT equal. That's the reason a lot of society is so messed up, because we are using an incompatible equation.

I'm not saying one should be racist, sexist, or homophobic I'm simply saying we should just ignore all of that completely and just look at people for who they are. Different people. Great things will happen when people stop looking for difference and equality at the same time.

 

[Mr. X]

Gender neutrality aside, does the world have a legal right to know the sex of your child? Seems like some people are caring about the wrong things here.

Hows about instead of raising high hell about parents not wanting to tell the world what sex their kid is, we focus on solving the problems the economy is having right now?

 

[Livewire]

Gender neutrality aside, does the world have a legal right to know the sex of your child? Seems like some people are caring about the wrong things here.

Hows about instead of raising high hell about parents not wanting to tell the world what sex their kid is, we focus on solving the problems the economy is having right now?

Technically, in the United States, every male child is required to enroll with the selective service once they turn 18, no objections. So in that sense, gender would matter in the eyes of the governement. Insurance companies also like to know that sort of thing when determining your insurance policy and your coverage, because policies vary depending on gender. But other than that, there's no ~real~ need to know.

This whole situation is pretty stupid. Which explains why people don't stop talking about it.

 

[Mr. X]

Aite then, lets me rephrase that.

At its (current) age does the world have the right to know what its sex is?

But then again, I was referring to people not government. Should have phrased that part clearer earlier so i'll make the clear right now.

The hospital the child was born at knows. Its parents know. The insurance company will know when they apply for the childs insurance. The government will know once it starts attending school. I've covered (most) of the main groups that have a technical 'right' to know but does this mean that the average person has to know as well?

And before someone calls me out and calling the child a it, as its sex has yet to be revealed I won't be attempting to classfy it either way.

 

[Oryx]

Hows about instead of raising high hell about parents not wanting to tell the world what sex their kid is, we focus on solving the problems the economy is having right now?

Because in my free time I solve the problems the economy is having. This argument assumes that either the government is talking to the parents and therefore neglecting their duties, or that the average people (journalists, passionate comment-writers, PC members) have the ability to fix the economy. Lol >_>

By the way if you're going to be politically correct by not using the male pronoun as gender neutral, "it" isn't the word you want. It's "he/she", "his/her", etc. Just for future reference, "it" implies it has no gender, when if you're not sure, the proper way is to use either both, the male ones, or the random gender neutral pronouns that exist that no one uses. (:

I'm not arguing that I have a right to know what sex it is. I don't think anyone here is arguing that point. What I'm arguing is that the child is going to grow up with a gender complex, because once he/she's old enough to understand that there's a difference between gender and sex, he/she's old enough to be asked questions about his/her sex everywhere they go. People who don't know him/her at all will care, not about the child as a person, but the child as a child without sex and he/she'll have to deal with knowing that thousands of people only care about him/her because of his/her sex, nothing more. If this kid had been born, his/her sex had been announced, and he/she moved on to live a normal life, I wouldn't have heard of it, no one would have cared. Instead, that kid is growing up as a celebrity that no one actually cares about beyond his/her sex.

 

[Dawn]

I'm not arguing that I have a right to know what sex it is. I don't think anyone here is arguing that point.

I just realized I never made this clear. o.O
Toujours is right. I for one am not concerned with the child's sex, and don't believe I have some... innate right to know. I am concerned with the mental health of a child of parents that are letting their ideals get in the way of good parenting. He could be a girl, or a boy. It doesn't matter, because either way he's being denied the exact same thing.

 

[Who's Kiyo?]

I've discussed this before with a club at my school and my family, too. Funny this keeps coming up.

Anyway, I understand what the parents are trying to do. Their ideal is that they want their child to grow up in a free-of-judgment environment to fully express them self and flourish; and no matter their sex, they want the child to express it's own personality whether it's more masculine or feminine.
It's a nice thought, in theory.

First off,
Human infants barely have their personality yet, because their brains haven't fully developed, and it won't be complete until s/he hits around twenty or so.
So what s/he is going to do anyway is mimic its older siblings and parents. This is what humans do. S/he is not going to make personal decisions on their own about what clothes to wear, etc.
It's going to get information about human behavior and decisions from her/his family and makes their own using that gathered information.
S/he's going to mimic.
If they wear a certain thing, it's not because they're more masculine/feminine. It's because they're integrating what they've observed.
Only until later on will the child's personality be grown enough to even prefer something based on masculinity/femininity or personality.

Second, there's a huge difference, when they're old enough to make personal decisions, between:

Parent: "You know, it's okay if you wear that."
Child: "Well, okay...."

versus

Child: "Hey, do you think I could wear that instead of these?"
Parent: "Sure, I don't see a problem. If that's what you like."

In scenario one, we're getting sort of an influence of implied opinions. It's pushing the child to make that certain decision that's "okay."
In scenario two, the child is making its own decision, and the parent is accepting.

It's influence vs. actual preferred taste.

It seems to me the parents are doing scenario one.
You should support your child whether you child be masculine of feminine. or neither, even. Saying to them without them asking will give the child notions that you want to make that particular choice.

Anyway, that's my take.
Please, if you want me to elaborate or have questions, comments, just quote. :3

 

[Mr. X]

Well, technically, since boys and girls look diffrent even at younger ages the kid (should) be able to relize that he/she looks more like group A then group B. Due to every persons innate desire to 'fit in' the child would (most likely) impersonate that group.

 

[Dawn]

Well, technically, since boys and girls look diffrent even at younger ages the kid (should) be able to relize that he/she looks more like group A then group B. Due to every persons innate desire to 'fit in' the child would (most likely) impersonate that group.

They're being deliberately sheltered away from other kids to avoid outside influences via homeschooling. =/ Says so in the original article, ftr.

 

[Åzurε]

It might strike you as illogical, but it's a fact of life for some people. It's something of a necessity to explain to people who aren't necessarily sympathetic or accepting. You gotta say: "physically I'm ______ but mentally I feel I'm ______" for some people to accept you and even then a lot won't.

So they say that sort of thing to explain it to those people who don't understand. I can see where they could be coming from. Doesn't make it less inconsistent on the part of those who try to distance themselves from gender roles.