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~*Relationship Guru*~ (Revived)

Ash_luver

Let me be, My perogative
    • 61
    Posts
    19
    Years
    Isnt it true that age really doesnt matter in love...cause i just got paired with a guy that is 2 years younger than me, i have to feelings, i lyk him a lot, but should i dump him do his age? Taki, since ur online, u can help me^^
     

    Taki

    PC's official CrAzY cAt!!
    • 201
    Posts
    19
    Years
    *sees she's late and Ash luver was relyiing on her* Oh sorry babe I'm late... anyway I think that you shouldn't dump him, no no, you shouldn't care about what other people think of you being with him... If you like him then stay with him and don't dump hiim only for the impression you might make on other people or for his age. Be happy with him! I hope this helps ^o^
     

    KoBRe LaiR

    Pokemon Forest Nature ©
    • 3,591
    Posts
    20
    Years
    Hi Claire, im back for some advice this time. Well here goes.


    im going out this Saturday with this girl named Megan a senior, and we like each otehr and all. We are goiung to the beach this Saturday, but something happened unexpectedly. I asked one of my best buds, Will to ask this guy Chris if he was bi, he did, and according to him he added that I wanted to go on a date with him, so he gave him the place and time where im taking Megan. Now im afraid to talk to chris tomorow in fourth period. And there is a third person, since I flirted with this guy named Jason who is "straight" but everyone knows he will turn eitehr bi or gay. So I started like a prank by choking him, but nothing happened since he didnt say not to, he let him self, then I rubbed his back and going down, and he said nothing. What do you think this means?
    Oh, and now my whole school knows Im bi thanks to some gay guy who hates me and everybody gives me this look. What can I do about that? Besides ignoring...
    I need major help.
     

    Elite Trainer Raven

    Better than you.
    • 854
    Posts
    19
    Years
    I'm amazed that there's not that many people begging for help in relationships. Let alone that a good handful of you are actually old enough to know what you're doing. This kinda thing would annoy me on Serebii.net, but that's considering mostly everyone's under the age of 14 and constantly asks how to get someone to like them. >_>

    Anyways, I don't need advice in picking up someone or getting someone to like me. Nothing like that. Would just like an opinion on a matter of mine from someone (or some people).

    First off, I've never been in a close distance relationship. Most of what I've been in has been long distance. Recently I've been somewhat seeing a girl who's been a friend of mine for about six years now. We weren't anything official since she doesn't like the idea of long distance since she couldn't bear with it. Lately she started getting close to some guy in her area and started talking about how he makes her happy and so forth and how she is enjoying getting close to him.

    So I decided that that was that and I cut it off between me and her since she was going for someone closer yet kept telling me that she loved me. Not gonna get into something like that where it becomes a triangle. She's angry with me now that I won't talk to her and says that I'm overreacting when she had not spoken to me for two weeks simply to be with someone else yet would try assuring me that I was the one for her.

    I'd like to know if I truly am overreacting. I don't really think I am considering it wasn't official and I end up feeling used for something like that. I don't wanna be a part of someone's life when they're involved with someone else. :s Gimme your opinions on this, please.
     

    Claire

    • 6,683
    Posts
    20
    Years
    • Seen May 21, 2011
    hmm..it's difficult to say. What was the kind of decision about your relationship with this girl from the start? If it was made obvious you were just friends, then maintaining the friendship would be great if possible. However, if things weren't clear and she decided this, or if you find it difficult to see her as purely a friend (im sure i would after such a long time -i would feel strong loyalty to the person) then it's a good idea to cut contact in order to break the possible feelings of strong attachment you have. She may say you're overreacting because she doesn't realise how you feel about her due to lack of enough conversation about the situation. So, if your feelings are strong for this girl, it is a good idea to cut off contact -it's the best way to ween yourself off of someone.
    Who knows, in the future once you're over your feelings towards her (and may have found someone else) and will be willing to enable the friendship again, but that is your decision to make -there is no right or wrong decision ^^
     

    Elite Trainer Raven

    Better than you.
    • 854
    Posts
    19
    Years
    Well at first we were just friends but then we started getting abit close. She wanted us to be together, but she didn't want it to be long distance and insisted drop everything I have here and live with her. Was hesitant about it considering I didn't wanna risk having to lose everything and end up finding out it wouldn't work in the end. And I feel it's a good thing I didn't.

    She knew how I felt about her, but she sent me quite abit of some mixed messages. Seemed more like she would say she cared when no one was around to listen. But when it comes to a public audience (such as putting info in her LiveJournal), no where was I mentioned. So it seemed like she didn't want me involved.

    Decided to cut communication off before it went any further to keep my sanity and to keep the peace. I'm just not the kind of person that likes being told one thing and then seeing another. :\
     

    Anacortes

    absurdities..
    • 2,224
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Seen May 9, 2010
    Hi there, I have a problem where my friend's boyfriend likes me and now after she knows she's really mad, but I just can't seem to find a way to explain to the guy that he can't like two girls at once...what do you think would be the best way to talk to him?
     

    Claire

    • 6,683
    Posts
    20
    Years
    • Seen May 21, 2011
    Raven: hmm..it seems she was never sure about things then Raven. It is likely that just as easily as she wanted you to drop everything and live with her, she would just as easily want you to drop everything and move back if she lost interest.
    When someone is as fickler as that, it's best to remain as semi-distant friends -being close friends would probably start the same issues up again, whether or not she continues with this new guy, so maintaining some distance will help protect your feelings.

    Anacortes: Firstly, does this mean that you have no feelings for him? If that is the case then your friend had no right to get angry at you -his feelings are his decisions, not yours. You may say that he can't like two people at once, but it does happen. If his feelings for other girls are relatively strong, he has to do is take a break from his girlfriend to not only give himself time to think about who he cares about, but also his girlfriend deserves someone who carely whole heartedly about her. But make sure that what he has isnt just physical attraction towards you -if that's the case then that's perfectly natural -we can't all just close our eyes for good ^^;
     

    Cool Cr@cker

    I am now Chrono Cr@cker
    • 1,778
    Posts
    20
    Years
    Claire I need some Major Help buddy...
    A girl in My class, whom I consider only as friends has indirectly told me that she liked me. From August she has been sending messages through her friends that she liked me, but I refused to believe them!Anyway Last week her best friend came and told me that and I just shouted at her saying you guys(girls) are all just teasing me.Well I was shocked when she herself told me this!I just told her coldly that I dont care for her more and I feel about her only as a friend..She just walked away.How do I let her know again without hurting her feelings!
    Thanks!
    PM me the answer!
     

    Claire

    • 6,683
    Posts
    20
    Years
    • Seen May 21, 2011
    Well..that's difficult CC since you've already said to her "i don't care for you anymore" ^^;
    What i can suggest is put yourself in her shoes. You have a friend and you really start to like them..you're too embarassed to tell them, but you tell your friends hoping that the friend will find out. You gain up courage to finally tell your friend that you like them, and then they say they don't care for you -its a tough situation to go through, but we've all been there ^^
    The best way to go about things is normally to subtly suggest you're not interested in them is to say you're interested in other people -talk about girls you're attracted to etc. and the one who likes you normally takes the hint. It may be too late for that since you've already told her you dont feel for her, but go up to her and tell her that you didnt mean to hurt her feelings, but her confession just surprised you. Say that you really love your friendship, and that you feel you can talk to her about everything. Say you don't think it's worth the risk of a relationship which may end up in the friendship breaking up.
     

    KoBRe LaiR

    Pokemon Forest Nature ©
    • 3,591
    Posts
    20
    Years
    Claire, your adviced on MSN worked out pretty well. Probably you already saw the results, Im happily in a relationship with Jason who is really cool, and cute. You already know all this, anyways thanks for your help.
    Now I need help on getting past his parents.. O.o!!
     

    Claire

    • 6,683
    Posts
    20
    Years
    • Seen May 21, 2011
    I'm really happy for you alex *hugs* and don't worry -his parents just need to adjust ^^
    Forbidden love can sometimes make things more exciting ;)
     

    Vincent Valentine

    Midnight Angel
    • 350
    Posts
    19
    Years
    Congrats Alex!
    Anywho, Claire, guess who's back with yet another problem?
    CLAIRE: SANTA CLAUS?
    ME: NO! ME! lol

    Anywho, that was my daily rant of the day. Now, onto my problem.
    Alright, how to word this?
    Um....
    Alright, let's see. There's this girl in my Science class. She's a sophmore, which is cool cause if things work out, I'll be dating someone older! lol
    anywho, I really like talking to her, and she seems to be the only one I can have conversations with on a level higher than 5th grade. She's a really cool person, but I don't know what to tell her. I mean, I like her. I do. She's cool and smart.
    Now, the thing is, we sit right across from each other, so....if I tell her and things go bad, we're stuck for the rest of the year, always in an akward place. I really don't want that either. I just don't know what to do.
    I mean, honestly, I'm afraid just to ask her for her email adress! lol :D
    So, what does the mighty and all powerful Claire have to say to this small minion!? :D
     
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