Rock, Paper... My Foot!

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Your OH apple is no match for the Peanut Butter Jelly banana!
 
There is no spork! At least not after Morrain the Hyperborean giant eats it!
 
Your Morrain the Hyperborean giant is no match for my magus titan! >:D
 
magus titan? pfft. come at my chopsticks
 
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Your oversized paper shredder is no match for my foot! *kicks it!*
 
Your foot shall become burned off your body due to the radiating heat of my, get ready for it....

OVERSIZED CHEESEBURGER!!!
 
Your oversized cheeseburger is no match for my COLOSSAL CHEESE TOASTIE!!
 
Your COLOSSAL CHEESE TOASTIE is no match for my Cute Kitten Sweater!
 
Your Cute Kitten Swear is no match for my Adorable Puppy T-shirt!
 
Your Adorable Puppy T-Shirt vomits and dies from the sheer awesomeness of my real life Pikachu!
 
Your Pirate Ship is nothing compared to my battalion of Dwarves! >:D
 
Your battalion of Dwarves will Trigger a collective fear response, due to my Extraterrestrial Paperweight Of Channel Hopping (codename EPOCH ;) )
 
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