The "Infinite" "Wisdom" of Shanghai Alice

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Haunted House of Onyx said:
Okay, How do I get an attractive woman to love me?
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Wait, I think this question and the next are one in the same...


Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! said:
Should I go down to Florida this weekend to waste all of my money at the dog track?
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SHANGLEONE MODE.

*Changes into a suit, and puts on a fedora*

You got problems? Then Uncle Shanghai can help you out. For a price.

HHoO, a little favor or two, and we'll take care of the rest. She'll practically be beggin' you to love her.


Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! And listen to my answer.

The dog tracks? They ain't worth your time. We fix the races, so there's no point in betting.

The snail tracks are the smart investment.
 
Would you fancey a spot of Tea?
 
Shanghai Alice said:
When you think of a kappa...

You...

...

RUB IT IN, WHY DON'T YOU? OH! LOOK! NITORI'S NOT A KAPPA! SHE LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN! HAHA, WHAT KIND OF KAPPA LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN?

I DO. You think I'm HAPPY about my appearance? You think I want to look like a human? Is that it? Do you really think I'm that dead to my emotions, that you can make fun of me at your leisure?

Listen here, human. I might not like your kind in Gensokyo, and I might try to avoid physical contact at all costs, but...

YOU MESSED WITH THE WRONG KAPPA.
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To Nitori: Oh! Sorry! I didn't mean to offend you! I said it so naively...

To Shangai Alice: Will she forgive me someday? =)
 
Shanghai Alice said:
...why not?

Even though that excuse is worn out, it's still good.

[/Tollbooth]
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Ah! One of my favorite children's books of all time. OF ALL TIME

Garouga, you should start hitting on a random forum member, but if you suspect them to be a boy, pretend they're a girl. Or vice-versa. And link me to your conversations.
<.<
>.>
<.<
/slinks off into obscurity
 
Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! said:
Who should I creep out
shamelessly flirt with
express my undying love to shamelessly flirt with?
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Shanghai Alice's Paid Dating Service is now open.

...but not to you. You should shamelessly flirt with...

AZURE! GET IN HERE!

Reddo said:
To Nitori: Oh! Sorry! I didn't mean to offend you! I said it so naively...

To Shangai Alice: Will she forgive me someday? =)
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No, she probably won't. Nitori gets angry very easily.

She's also hiring Rika to work on the Flower Tank Mk II Project, so... you're dead.

Åzurε said:
Ah! One of my favorite children's books of all time. OF ALL TIME

Garouga, you should start hitting on a random forum member, but if you suspect them to be a boy, pretend they're a girl. Or vice-versa. And link me to your conversations.
<.<
>.>
<.<
/slinks off into obscurity
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...oh, wait, you did get in here. Much love and thanks, Azure. That's what I pay enslave you for.
 
Dear magic diary, why are my feet hurting?
 
Pokestick said:
Arisu, why am I typing so fast that I get my title more often than I don't?
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Because the Pokestick is actually a Pokestick of +666 WPM.

You've used it too often, so you now type at 666000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 WPS.

You're a monster.

Please try again in 44.9999999999999999999999999999999999999993 seconds.
 
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