This Dusty Desert Road

oni flygon

:)
    • 7,901
    Posts
    21
    Years
    New Poem, mmhmm... inspired from the works of Bruce Springsteen... I want to capture that moment of hope in midst of desperation... and I came up with this. There's a reason I reposted my two poems from last year and it's because this alludes to them.

    This Dust Desert Road

    There is a feeling of euphoria
    As the arid desert air hits my face
    No sand in my eye
    As I stomp on the baked black asphalt
    Following this aimless desert highway
    Beyond mountains, to the ocean
    Away from the forest, from the meadow

    And memories of Yesteryear
    I hold on to tightly
    Finding myself bound to emotions
    Imbued with imagination
    Facing the crashing desert storm
    About to pass through me

    And wary hope, wandering this desert
    Raised from moments of neglect and dread
    Hanging to salvation by a thread
    She looks to me to hold on
    To help her weather the winds
    To help me let go of the past
    Of my bound emotions of love

    In the middle of the sandstorm
    I feel the memories slipping away
    From my fingers, from my grasp
    To find themselves lost
    Love finds herself caught up
    In between the lines of flesh and fantasy
    And angels flutter by, tugging her arms
    Showing her the way out of this mess
    Only to rip her apart
    And scatter the pieces through the wind

    And all the memories
    Of the vast forest and never ending meadows
    Are carried away by the dust
    Pushed away to oblivion
    As I hold on to dear hope—
    Poor abashed and battered hope—
    While I trod on with dazed footsteps
    On this dusty desert road

    As the storm passes away
    Only the sweet whispers of assurances are heard
    The soft promises from hope held tightly
    Invigorates this weary soul
    To yearn for the ocean on the other side
    Casting aside the doubts in mind
    As long as I follow this aimless road
    With hope to hold and behold
     
    mmm...deep words dude..so deep, it reached far beyond my vocabulary...although i like your idea though...i could use this col poem of yours as an inspiration...anyways...its fantastic...although, i think you had an error at the title..hehe...

    keep it up!
     
    I like the choice of words, and as I've already mentioned, its originality(structure, theme, metaphors). I think I've said too that this is weeping, craving, calling for a melody. The rhythm is something you might want to work on with this one, but other than that, the poem's pretty good. It truly transmits a feeling.
     
    Amidst the flurry of eloquence and beauty I perceived naught but a single yearning desire flowing through the piece. =O

    In other words, it's a very beautiful poem. Your choice of words is ..."difficult" in a sense to describe the procedure. Regardless, it's pretty, Onii-chan! The lack of rhythm contributed to its 'difficulty,' though. I suck at choosing words, lol.

    Nice job, nice job.

    There, I posted.
     
    You must log in or register to reply here.
    Back
    Top