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Vaporeon Dreams... (fixed)

Aw, cute stowy. X3

Mmm...Spelling errors. Get MS word or spellcheck and fix them. XD (Reapeting- Repeating, yers-years, indincating-indicating, sarcasticly-sarcastically, grined-grinned, supossed-supposed) and you used some apostrophe misuse...Also, try checking out this part:

"No, Joel. That Vaporeon is a stray and dirty." She answered his question.
Click to expand...

You didn't need the 'a' considering you were describing the Vaporeon. And for such words as 'wasn't' and 'couldn't'..make sure you remember to add apostrophes, K? ^^;Also, some dialogue mistakes using an example of the previous one:

"No, Joel. That Vaporeon is a stray and dirty." She answered his question.
Click to expand...

It should be:

"No, Joel. That Vaporeon is stray and dirty," she answered his question.

There were plentiful amounts of mistakes like that...try to avoid them in the future! As for Aurora, Jet seemed cool, and I like the way you left the ending.

Nice job, keep it up! ^_~
 
thatnks lily.^^ i`ll try to do better. i know i`m not the best fic writer, but i try.

hey! you could be my official fic er, checker person... ^^

i have another...
 
i back!! it so sad how these two loves just don't get together. it like a one sided love. Jet loves Aurora but Aurora is undecidius on what she wants. figthing with her montions to love Jet.

Then there Kiki and Aurora who still together but what keeps them together? it also goodly how this Fanfis is. (can't say the same for me. i have writers block rigth now.(bangs head on table))

GIVE ME MORE!!
 
okay, i guess i should really stop getting side-tracked...^^'

ch.6: Battle in the rain... ​

"Are you okay?" Aurora asked, noticing Jet was panting.

"Yeah, fine..." He said, but Aurora didnt believe him. "Maybe you should leave..."

"I cant fight for myself, you know." Aurora said frowning.

"Against two pokemon at once?"

Aurora was silent for a moment. "I.... no..." She admited.

"Exactly." Jet said.

"So what makes you think you could?" Aurora demanded, stomping one paw.

"I can't."

Another dark ball shot at them. Aurora jumped, and Jet ducked.

"This is just pure luck." Said a voice. Its tone made Aurora's skin crawl. She didnt like them, and instinc told her to watch out.

"Yeah. These two will be perfect. And they'll be easy to catch." Added another voice. "Get 'em, Seviper!"

Aurora paniced. It was raining so hard, she couldn't see. The Seviper could have been anywhere...

"Arrgh!" Aurora heard Jet yell. Her heart raced as she ran toward the sound of his voice, hoping he was alright.

"Jet!!!" She shouted, slowing down. He was nowhere to be seen.

"Attack, Mightyena!" Something hit Aurora in the face. She could feel a warm liquid drip down her cheek.

Aurora stumbled. She couldnt see, and she was a target for another attack.

Ka-BOOM!!!

Lightning flashed overhead as thunder rolled through the sky. For an instant, everything was illuminated. There was just enough time for Aurora to pinpoint Migthyena's location.

As the light disappeared, so did Aurora.

She charged at Mightyena, and hit it on the side.

"You'll pay for that!" She shouted, regaining her balence.

Aurora smiled viciously. "I think not."

*~*~*​

Aurora lay on the ground, shaking. Mightyena leaned on a tree. They had been engaged in battle for almost an hour, and both showed signs of giving up.

Slowly, Aurora got to her paws. "I... wont.... let you win...." She said, limping toward Mightyena.

The Mightyena chuckled. "Its pointless." She replied, swaying, "You'll never win..." She fell forward.

Aurora managed to stay on her feet, even though every little move she made sent pain searing through her body. "Get up." She comanded.

Mightyena howled. Aurora didnt move, having no idea what was going to happen.

Aurora heard footsteps. "You stupid animal..." Said the first voice Aurora had heard earlier. A man appeared through the rain, looking through a backpack. He wore strange clothes, a black and white striped t-shirt, and jeans. On his head was a bandana, with a weird symbol.

Finaly, he found what he was looking for. "You'll be gettin` no dinner tonight." He growled walking away, cursing under his breath.

Some kind of food lay on the ground in front of Mightyena. She ate it, swallowing the pill whole.

Energy seemed to come back to her. She stood with ease, and sneered at the Vaporeon.

"Now who's gonna win?" She taunted. Aurora couldn't believe this. After all that hard work she had done.

Another voice broke through the rain. "We got one!" He said happily.

No... Thought Aurora, They got Jet...

Her strength seem to flood bach to her. Aurora growled, and prepared for the next attack.

"I... wont.... let..... YOU TAKE HIM FROM ME!!!!" Aurora shouted. She shot an Ice Beam at Mightyena. The white beam hit Mightyena on the chest.

Mightyena charged at Aurora. She jumped onto a low branch of a tree. Mightyena opened her mouth, and shot a dark ball at Aurora. It raced at her, but Aurora jumped to the ground the second before it hit her.

Aurora bit Mightyena. The wolf howled in pain. She rammed Aurora into a tree, almost knocking the vaporeon out.

Auora fell to the ground. She had lost....

"Heh," Mightyena said smugly, "I knew you couldnt win."

Aurora lifted her head. "Yes... I... CAN!!!" She growled. Aurora got back to her feet, and stood in one spot, concentrating.

A faint noise could be heard in the distance. It became louder, becoming a roar. Mightyena paniced.

"What are you-" A large wave swept over the land, taking everything with it. Aurora was holding onto a branch with her teeth, and it looked as though it would brake.

When the water drained, she found herself at the very top of a tree, but she wasnt the least bit conserned about that.

Wheres Jet...?
 
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I just read all the chapters!Your a very good writer.I like your fanfic.It's awesome,intresting,and unique.^^
 
*bows* thank you, thank you! your all just too kind!
XD thanks tabbi.^^
 
Ch.7: They Got Her...​

"JET!!!" Aurora shouted, but her voice was lost in the rain. Thunder roared loudly overhead and the freezing rain pelted her back. "Where are you?!" Her tears mixed with the rain that was hitting every square-inch of her body.

"No.... You can't be..... gone..... " She said quietly, sitting down, and staring at the mud around her. The Vaporeon bit her lips, trying hard not to cry, although she already was. "Jet...." The forest around her was dark, and dreary, making her feel even worse. The trees towered over Aurora, dripping with cold rain. She shuddered, starting to stand again.

"Aurora...." A faint voice called. Auroara's ears perked up. She knew that voice.

"Jet.... Jet?!" She said, running toward the sound of his voice, "JET!!!" She could see the dark shape leaning against a tree. He collapsed, urging Aurora to run faster.

"Aurora..." Jet gasped, trying to stand, "They got her... I tried to protect her, but I couldnt.... Its all my fault..."

"Jet, settle down... Please, your hurt..." Aurora said, noticing many injuries on him. She thought he was delusinal. What was he talking about?

"No.... We have to save her....." He tried to walk, but only fell aganst Aurora.

"Who, Jet? Save who?" Aurora couldnt make any sence out of this. "Please, tell me. Its okay."

"No..... not okay.... They got the girl..... Kiki....." Jets eyes closed, and he slumped against the ground.

Aurora sat there, shaking. None of this added up. They went after her and Jet, but got Kiki? What?

"Jet...." Aurora's eyes closed as well, as she fell beside him.

Okay, I would type more, but I gotta go soon...
 
Thanks, Reyna.^^ I try to keep things intresting by twisting the plot up. Wait till next month. *Evil grin*
 
Ch.8: You Have Taught Me...​

Aurora was blinded by sulight as she awoke. Blinking and trying to get rid of the yellow spots from the sun she sighed, remembering last nights events. It was all so clear to her, losing Jet, the joy of finding him again, learning about Kiki's capture... A thought suddently hit Aurora. Wheres Jet?

The bushes in front of her rustled, as a black fuzzy face peeked out from them. But there was something different about this face. The usual happy-go-lucky grin was nowhere to be seen and Jet's eyes seemed to show emptness. The long slash on his left cheek made him look even less cheerful. Aurora couldn't stand to see him this way.

"Jet..." She started, searching for words, but none came. Jet looked everywhere but at her.

"Aurora... I'm so sorry... Its my fault.... " He said quietly. Sunlight rained down upon his coat, illuminating the black surface. Jet finaly met her eyes. Aurora felt lost in the two pools of green, sadness reflecting back at her.

"No..." She insisted, gazing back at him. Jet could stare at her blue eyes forever. He felt comftort in them.

"Yes. I couldn't stop them..."

"Thats right. You alone couldn't stop them. But, togerther, we could."

This captivated Jet's attention. Aurora continued on.

"All my life, I thought I was alone. I was shunned by the other Vaporeons; an outcast. My heart heardened, and I stopped interacting with everyone all together. Then, I met a young girl, who taught me a lesson: 'Never let life bring you to your kness, no matter how hopeless the circumstances are'. But, I ignored that lesson. That is, until I met you. You taught me that there is always some good in the world, always some little bit of hope left. Even if that one bit of hope is small, it can grow, overcoming anything. Jet, you have taught me a very important thing. Wherever theres darkness, theres always a bit of light."

Why was Aurora acting this nice? She had never cared for anyone like this black Vaporeon, named Jet. She had never felt this way for another. This wasn't sympathy for a lost little girl. The emotion Aurora was feeling was much deeper. This was love for another, love for someone who had lived through hell through-out their life. This was love for one person that could see through Aurora's anger and pain. Aurora couldn't deny it anymore. She was in love with Jet.

"I taught you that?!" Jet seemed shocked, "But, I havent even known you for a week!" He looked proud of himself, despite the situation. And better yet, a small smile was back on his face.

"Yes, you did." Aurora said, walking to his side and resting her head on his shoulder. "You have taught me how to live."

Well, I would type more, but I'll leave that for next chapter. See ya!
 
Beside a few misspelled words it is pretty good.

We get more into Kiki and Aurora's reationship. I been intrested in that. Keep it going.
 
that story was very well written.[gives you plushie] why not have a sassy espeon try and inter fear with there love?
 
Oh LORD, its been a long time since I've written in this thing! *slaps self* Bad Saphi!!!

Oooh, thats a good idea, but I think I know what I'll do next... *evil grin* You never know what I'll post next... or when. XD

Ch.9: Kiki's Transformation...​

"C'mon, you Slowpoke, get over here!!" Auroara shouted gleefully, running through the meadow. Jet was behind her and quickly catching up. They had decided to rescue Kiki. But who said they couldn't have fun while doing it?

Jet had caught up to Auroara now, and nipped at her heels playfully. "Now who's the Slowpoke?" He laughed, pulling ahead of her. Auroara pounced on his tail to slow him down, and leapt over him, taking the lead again.

"So," Jet said, panting. They were walking now, and still in the middle of the meadow. "Do you have any idea where we're going?"

Auroara shook her head. "Not a clue."

"You don't even have a hint?"

"Nope. Do you?"

"Not really."

They walked in silence now, pondering over where they would find the strange people. Meanwhile....

~*~*~​

"Oi, its a girl!! We got a girl!" One of the grunts exclaimed, opening the cage. Kiki tumbled out, looking lost and frightened. They were in the middle of the forest, the opposite way from where Auroara and Jet were heading.

The other rubbed his head, looking puzzled. "No wonder it was so heavy..." He muttered, watching the trembling girl.

"Wh-who are you?" The girl demanded, trying to sound brave. These men were weird. She had never seen anyone dressed this way. "And where a-am I?"

"Er... We're some friends of your mummy's!" The first one said.

Kiki looked at his in disbeliefe. "I don't have a mom..." The second man looked sad.

"Well, we could take her to base for training. Give her a home, and everything. I think this girl could become a good Aqua trainer," He said, turning to his partner, who was watching Kiki as she curled up into a ball.

"I guess that would work. We need some more members anyways." They turned to face Kiki.

The first one reached out to her. "My name is Tom, and my friends name is Tim. We, er, can give you somewhere to stay, if you?d like,? He said, taking her hand. Kiki smiled weakly. Maybe these people weren?t so bad?


Sorry for it being so short...
 
I haven't seen this in a while. This always makes me feel better.

WHAT!?!?! No, don't do it. She can't be turn evil. Her heart is to pure!

I really like to see what you going to do next! More more more!!
 
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