Barrels

I think I'm literally a thread killer. I'll post in a thread and then NO ONE ELSE RESPONDS EVER.

~28 hours later~

It is a conventional swear word with 'e' tacked onto the end. It starts with an S and ends in a T - but I'm not shocked that you didn't recognise it... it is British, after all :P

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! THE HUMILIATION IS TOO GREAT I CANNOT STAND IT! And I figured you might have seen the TV cameras around! Country places tend to be small tight-knit communities, I'm sure you'd know if you had some exciting big city TV show coming to a house near you! :P

W-wait. Seriously? They were actually arguing the truthfulness of that comment in the youtube comment stream? YouTube is hilarious lmao. People are just dumb there. I've inadvertently gotten myself into so many YouTube fights because people are just dumb lmao.

Barrels' breaking the chain > Money > A gargantuan moth named Terry > The Cotswolds > The Goth Detectives > condoms >******* terrible English TV > Lily Allen > Self-flagellation > my forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Although... maybe you didn't forget to do it and break the chain. Maybe you just realised that nothing could trump money and forfeited in shame!

EDIT: I have been trying to reply to this thing for two days. Every time I sat down to do it, something would pull me away. YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT TO ME THAN ANYBODY JUST SO YOU KNOW! Anyway, below you will find your regular scheduled programming:

From the moment I saw you'd italicised "believe", I read that entire line in Hermione's voice :P And if you provide me with the glider and the giant moth named Terry, I'll be more than happy to provide you with the proof!

And I made it girlfriend because you are straight! If I'd said "I don't go around insulting your boyfriend" it would be weird because you'd never have a boyfriend (much to my dismay)! I was catering for you, you unappreciative little ****e!

But yes, the implication there was that I am married to money :P

OK seriously, you live in the country country? Like, in a place that may have been visited by Escape to the Country? (also lmao I thought for a second you'd legit never heard of the Cotswolds and had just made a typo... then I realised you were mocking my typo. Screw you :P)

OK now, watching!

*five minutes later* LMFAO. omg. I'm so relieved, I've been terrified for the last three years that I might have gotten somebody pregnant. I use condoms, but the success rate is only like 99% so I'm happy the bum-bum is a baby-free zone.

Money > A gargantuan moth named Terry > The Cotswolds > The Goth Detectives > condoms >******* terrible English TV > Lily Allen > Self-flagellation > my forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

lmao yeah I own them all because they had irresponsible owners who went inactive. So I had them changed into my name because I know I'll take care of them and I don't want them to die :P The only club I actually started myself was the Retail Workers Union, everything else I just absorbed like Majin Buu (I hope you get that reference. It isn't British, so you should :P)

Et je n'ai pas besoin de Google Traduire! Je parle francais moi-meme, merci beaucoup! Je....... alright I'm incredibly rusty but I did five years of high school French and I came first every year! French was my specialty subject! Though I do love that you can tease me in more than one language :P




I think you know where I'm going with this, sir. Better than money? I don't go around insulting your girlfriend... oh, well I guess I did, but that's because she was a ***** who will hopefully get chlamydia.

YOU LIVE IN THE ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE? SERIOUSLY? IS IT THE CODSWOLDS?! IS THE COTSWOLDS WHERE YOU LIVE?! I CAN'T STOP SAYING COTSWOLDS. COTSWOLDS!

And yes, 'chavs' is a British thing. I just said it because I try and speak in the national vernacular of whoever I'm talking to to reduce confusion... since I speak fluent British and American :P. Incidentally Australia does have its own version of chavs, and in true Australian style, they're even less cool. Here, we call them 'bogans'. You're free to look that up at your leisure :P

OK I went into your link, and I want to watch it, I really do. But can I just say one word? Well not even a word, just a string of numbers:

1:41:17. That is how long it goes for :P. THAT IS THE LONGEST THING I HAVE EVER BEEN LINKED TO ON YOUTUBE! Where is this 'bit' I'll adore because I cannot devote that much time to a YouTube video :P


The Cotswolds > The Goth Detectives > condoms >******* terrible English TV > Lily Allen > Self-flagellation > my forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Oops, I should have been more clear. I'm not going to be a dance teacher, I'm going to teach high school English! :) I am going to study dance as a minor, though.

Yeah, a mashup would be fun. It would be almost impossible though. :P I can always try! Haha. :D I'll definitely film the first few dances out of those I choreograph. I've had a pretty dry period. I just haven't been feeling choreography lately...

Well this isn't even the first time I've told you this, but I am not the mod of Other Clubs :P. I am the mod of Other Voting Polls! You are my friend you should know these things!

And Ladette to Lady is great! I've never watched an episode in my life but I can tell just from the previews that it is amazing, life-changing work, and it's cleaning up the streets of not only Britain, but Australia as well! They take 8-10 chav girls every year and put them together in Eggleston Hall where these two uptight old crones teach them how to be ladies! Seasons 1-3 have British girls, and Seasons 4 and 5 have Australians. I know I feel safer on the streets since this wonderful show came around. It's 16-20 less potential muggers I have to worry about.

Escape to the Country is... not to over-sell this... the greatest show of all time. They take a couple of Londoners each week who are desperate to get away from city life and into the Cotswolds and other country areas to show them four separate houses they could potentially buy. They rarely, if ever, buy any of the houses they're shown, but it's a great way to be shown the English countryside and have a peak around in people's houses and take bets on whether they'll buy the house or not :P.

My God my life is boring.

I am glad you like Lily Allen. It means you get to live and I don't have to kill you and put you in a back alley dumpster. I am pissed at her right now, though. A few weeks ago she announced via tweet that she was coming back to music - getting me all fanboying and squeeing - then just weeks later she announces she's... you guessed it, pregnant. More spawn to distract her from her gifts to the world. I UNDERSTAND THE NEED FOR SEX, BUT MY GOD USE A CONDOM.

Condoms >******* terrible English TV > Lily Allen > Self-flagellation > my forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Oh lawd, I'm definitely not professional. :P I have problems with injuries, and there's a good chance I have osteoarthritis in my knees, so I'm physically incapable of keeping up with a professional company, unfortunately. I would have loved to dance for the Joffrey for a few years before beginning my teaching career. :/

As far as music, it's hard to describe. Especially for jazz, because that style of dance can be taken in so many directions. I'll just give you an example for each style of dance I do, haha.

Ballet or Pointe: This is a personal favorite of mine- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtVl2Q9v8hA
Tap: Sounds like it wouldn't fit tap, but trust me, I love it. xD http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dxmf2o3GotY
Jazz: For contemporary jazz, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_sNi9nIXxVo.
For classical jazz- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF2EV93s6Yk.
For "jazz funk"- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-HSlgjLfdg

There's so many other variations of jazz, but those are the main ones I do. Anyway, continuing. xD

Hip Hop: I can do some mean choreography to more "pop-ish" artists like Beyonce, Destiny's Child, etc. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_y3MdOxtL0
Or if it's more like hardcore hip hop- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaaKglEVgUI

I don't really do Acro a whole lot anymore, because all of my injuries kind of stunted my ability to contort myself like that, but pretty much anything instrumental goes well. I like to use Cirque du Soleil music.

For Modern, you can pretty much use anything, but I prefer instrumental. My favorite so far is the song we used for recital this year. http://www.last.fm/music/Oliver+Kraus/_/Kalimbeth

And last but not least, Lyrical. The music would be preferably slow, and it has to display great emotion. Some songs I like:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=___l8Y21yNM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skoNpAZkOJ0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_U6iSAn_fY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_9sd6kGRuk

One of these days, I'll get around to filming my own choreography. I have little mini combinations in my head for almost all of these songs. I just need to stop being lazy and finish them. xD

If you can't tell, I love talking about dance. xD

Oh, and wolves and banjos a bonus? How about just banjos?
Pretty good for a lyrical- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tL_Ye0h5xEI

Oh calm yourself :P I forgot all about mah clubs yesterday and read your post right before I went to bed. It was masterful, as usual, but I didn't have the energy to reply to it so I put it off til this morning. It's the next item on my agenda after this VM!

Also do you not know what Ladette to Lady is?! It's another thing from your turf! I swear I know England better than the English do. I suppose you don't watch Escape to the Country either...?

You'd better at the very least like my spirit sister Lily Allen...

Lily Allen > Self-flagellation > my forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

OMFG I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT MY VMS TODAY. I READ THEM THEN OPENED ANOTHER TAB AND I JUST CLICKED BACK OVER AND HERE THEY ARE BUT IT'S 2AM SO I'M GOING TO BED I WILL REPLY PROPERLY IN THE MORNING I'M SO SORRY DON'T HATE ME.


My forgetfulness > Englishing correctly > Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Well, my studio kind of uses the term "dance intensive" pretty loosely. Dance intensives are usually one week long with classes everyday from somewhere around 7 AM- 4 PM. It's pretty much every style, too. At my studio, it's just two days a week, but you only study one discipline, and the classes are from 3:00-6:45. So instead of spending an hour per class everyday, you're just spending 3 hours and 45 minutes on one class twice a week. I took Jazz, since that's one of my strengths and I wanted to take a somewhat simple class for my last summer. :)

That's terrible! And after I offered to protect you from bullies! You've hurt Daddy's feelings :(

I'm glad you're happy about sounding like Daniel Radcliffe! I've actually physically heard our Mr Cat Dog speak and he legitimately does sound like Daniel Radcliffe, voice, accent and all - yet whenever I bring it up he visibly stiffens or changes the subject. He is a bad Englishman and you must teach him how to English correctly.

Oh :(. I'm disappointed that you didn't spit on me. While that would have been an incredibly mean-spirited thing to do, the Barrels I would have created would have been taught better manners than that and therefore would have been a version of you that was both younger and better behaved. He then would have grown up to teach elecution lessons on the 2043 season of Ladette to Lady. Oh well, I guess those old women will get to keep their jobs after all.

Daddy's unconditional love > NOOOOOOOOOOO > Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

And now most of my college stuff is in order AND my summer dance intensive is over so whee!

Haha, it wasn't really intended. :P

AND I'M SORRY I REALLY AM IT'S JUST COLLEGE STUFF IS A;LSKDJF;ALSKDJF and it's quite the time suck.

OHHAI! Haven't talked in a while. How goes it?

If anybody punches you out, you just come tell me and I'll sort them out. Nobody's gonna harm you and get away with it -_-. You're gonna be one of those deliriously over-confident kids at school who believe they are absolutely infallible because all you come home and hear is "you're the best, Daddy loves you. You're the best, Daddy loves you." and I'll be DAMNED if anybody is gonna take that away from my little man!

(I'm not sure where in this scenario I became your father, but lets roll with it)

And you said you looked like Darren Criss, so basically in my head you look like Darren Criss and sound like Daniel Radcliffe. I would like to be proven wrong on both counts as soon as possible kthx :P

and LMAO. I had no idea about the whole Elizabeth thing, that's so amazing. What an amazing reason for hatred of ALL THE MUGGLE-BORNS lmao.

Daddy's love > Royal Rejection > my hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

EDIT: Thank you for spitting on me - I will use the DNA to create my very own Barrels :)

You have to teach me to speak like you. You have all these subtle Britishisms in your speech that just make it a delight to read. YOUR VMs ARE THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY.

~So pleease don't take my sunshine away~

*ahem* yes, the Great British Summer, where more than three days of 33C heat is considered a 'heat wave'. Meanwhile, in the Great Australian Summer, 33C is the norm and every degree above is just a sizzling, sweating bonus. I feel such sympathy for you and your Great British Summer :P

I'm more bummed than you know about the picture thing. I am never going to see my very own British Darren Criss, am I? AM I? :(

And yeah, I did ask in the Harry Potter thread lmao - not sure if you saw. I haven't been back to the club since to check, but I hope the mystery can soon be put to rest!

My hatred of patriotism > Elizabeth's National Pride™ > rain > sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Yes, the nasty Slenderman scurrd me :(

Why were you at the beach?! It's England! Englishmen don't go to the beach! You better have taken pictures though, that's what the beach is for!

And lmao I can't explain who Elizabeth is either. I had that same problem. Maybe one of us should ask :P

In the spirit of your ill-fated beach trip, Rain > Sunshine > Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Slenderman > Emma Stone > alligators > chickens > fairies > Fowl > McGonagall > nukes > old ladies

Seriously... ****in' Slenderman. Have you seen that ****? It's horrible. I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight. It's worth about seventeen hippos made of nightmares.

Also for somebody who is so proud to be a Muggle you sure neglect the Harry Potter club that NEEDS YOU! :(

Just credit me in your sig or whatever. :)

If I hadn't said this before, but yes. You can use Lapracargo in any way you want.