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The Rainbow Connection [LGBTS Club]

Who's Kiyo?

puking rainbows
3,229
Posts
12
Years
I'd love to join this.

Personally, I'm homosexual. But not gay.

Probably a lot of you are quizzical about that last statement, so let me explain.

Back in the sort of beginning of the year, I was going through a large emotional struggle that was triggered (but wasn't the actual problem) by a crush with this quite amazing guy. Not only did depressed feelings rage in my soul, but so did jealousy and unjustified angst.
When this period of time was over, I started to truly dig into my opinions on the word "gay."

And I came to the conclusion, I'm not gay. I'm a homosexual. My sexuality has no effect on my true personality, and if anything, this was something I given as a gift to get me out of introverted phase of my freshmen year and make me more introspective. But now it's just the sex of my future husband. (Not partner, that's the most ridiculous title for a significant other just because you're the same sex in my opinion. But hey, if you like it, please, be my guess and use it.)

But how am I not gay but homosexual?
Homosexual is the actual sexuality.
Gay is a label.

Some people take pride and security with titles, but I'm not one of those people. I dislike very much to be categorized into some label rather than judged as a person for who I am.

Usually people realize very early that they're homosexual, and with that, they label themselves gay. But the ones who are insecure with the fact that their personalities are incomplete as teenagers can easily slip into the stereotype because it's an already made identity, and this gives them security, but they never acknowledge the personality that's the unique individual underneath afterwards. It restricts personality development and can lead to an identity crisis. Those who are naturally are more feminine (guy)/masculine (girl) are especially prone to this, because they think "oh, this is who I am!" when it's not.

I've seen the difference between naturally feminine guys and gay stereotype ones. It's quite staggering. It's like the difference between a naturally feminine girl and a stereotypical hyped-up cheerleader.

To me, the label doesn't fit me to the point where it was actually a hindrance and insulted my masculinity (I am naturally masculine, by the way. I'm also looking for an also masculine guy, if you were wondering.)
Why do I need this label?
So I choose not to use it. Simple as that.
And I felt so much more comfortable with myself and it helped me grow as a person.
I'm a homosexual, it's not even me, it's just who I like.
So why make it seem a huge part of who I am? I'm already comfortable with the fact.

So yeah, there's that summed up in a nutshell.
If you have questions or comments, don't hesitate.

But I have no problem with someone who likes using gay. If it makes you more comfortable like how not using it makes me comfortable.

And unless it's brought up or asked about, then why should I say it? It's not like it's important or anything.

But anyway, that's my spiel.
Now to the questions!

What got you into supporting LGBT rights? Who/What was your inspiration to do so?

Being homosexual, I guess. Equality for the win. Woo. My friend Claire was the inspiration at the time,
so I'd like to thank her for everything.
It's really a pity that's right now she's wrapped up in her own misery.

Have you come out of the closet? If so, and if you feel comfortable enough here in this safe space, share your coming out story with us. How did your parents/friends take it? Describe the scenario.

I suppose you can say I'm out of the closet. I'm honest about it, and hey, if you don't like it, whatever. Your insecurity isn't my problem. Bye.

The first time I admitted it to anyone was via text message to my best friend at the time, Claire. She immediately called me and supported me to the point where I almost drowned. She pushed me to join the GSA, which I did. In my history, saying "Hi, I'm [Name], and I'm a Freshman. And.... yeah, I'm pretty gay." (Even though that term doesn't apply anymore) was one of the best things I ever did; I was on the road to becoming who I aspire to be, that is, a better version of myself.

And that's how it got out for the first time. Yay.

Have you ever been "gay bashed" or know anybody that has? What tips would you give to others to avoid that or to defend yourself?

I know of plenty stories and things that happened to people in my GSA, but I'm confident that I can handle myself and be strong if I ever face it myself. I'm not going to die or get injured because someone didn't follow the golden rule "treat people the way you want to be treated" that we learned in bloody kindergarten.

You just got to stand up for yourself. That's all. And lifting weights help in case a bigot is really violent about it.
Yeah.

*cough*

Thanks for reading this wall of text :D
 
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Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.
8,959
Posts
13
Years
Well wow. Welcome, Destiny Demon, PartiallyInsaneWhimsicott and Kiyoshi the Polar Bear!

Kiyoshi, I agree with everything you say. Gay has always been a default term, a synonym, but I've never thought of it as a hindrance to someone being able to show their masculinity. One point I do have to make though, is that while homosexuality is only about who you like, not who you are, the gay label does grant us certain freedoms that homosexual may not. For instance, gay men are typically (and this is a generalisation so don't shoot me for it) more able to express love for others than straight men would be.

What I'm trying to say is that it's great that you have this great self-awareness about who you are, but in some instances it's good to let a little bit of the "gay" in :). I'm also a masculine guy in real life ("straight-acting" if we're using labels), and I know that while I also prefer guys more toward the masculine end of the spectrum, I wouldn't want one so masculine that he'd feel uncomfortable saying he loved me.

That said, never has a wall of text made me feel so attracted to a person in my life.
/inappropriate

I think I'm going to regret making this post, but I don't know exactly why just yet lol
 
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NurseBarbra

くら くら?
322
Posts
13
Years
  • Age 29
  • Seen Feb 4, 2017
Welcome to all new members! Today is a busy news day!


Oh god...Must... resist...urge...to rant... Anyway, In celebration of LGBT Month, I finally got my dear sweet mother to let me attend the LGBT Pride Festival in Dublin this month~ 17th - 21st is gonna be a long weekend~
 

Steven

[i]h e l p[/i]
1,380
Posts
13
Years
  • Age 30
  • Ohio
  • Seen Jan 4, 2023
[/U]

Oh god...Must... resist...urge...to rant... Anyway, In celebration of LGBT Month, I finally got my dear sweet mother to let me attend the LGBT Pride Festival in Dublin this month~ 17th - 21st is gonna be a long weekend~

FFFFFFFFFF! You're Irish?

We need to find a way to have kids. Now.

I made a little comic regarding "No homo." If you've never seen rage comics before, you might not get the faces. :x

Spoiler:
 

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.
8,959
Posts
13
Years
In relation to the first story posted.

"What does flying the homosexual flag, or any other similar display, have to do with your central banking mission under the Federal Reserve Act passed by Congress?" writes Marshall, one of the General Assembly's most conservative members.

I think the real question to be asked is, why not? Does having the flag there hinder their ability to bank? No. So what's the problem, Mr. Conservative? I think the Fed needs to just ignore all this debate and keep the flag there as though there is no controversy going on at all. There is no better defense against bullies than pretending you don't hear them.


...... Marry me?

Haha, so it wasn't just me, then? :P
 
85
Posts
12
Years
Also:


Anyone else have "Gay Powers"?

Oh my G! This was just...unbelievable. I mean, I know it's fake, but even in a play, how can parents be that stupid, and totally turn a blind eye to what their child is saying about an important lifestyle?

And I guess you could say I have the "Gay Powers" they were ranting about; but they were utterly cornfused, thinking that homosexual people act like the stereotypical "gender role"(I put quotations around this because they are, in fact, inventions of the human mind), which isn't what being homosexual is, or even transgendered for that matter. I mean, basketball is out of the stereotypical norm for girls, and I like it. And my mommy over there ("Hi!") says I have an "eye for fashion," as if it's the most obvious thing about me.

Ah, well, some people are probably just stupid like that. Heck, I bet my mom thinks I'm gay from what I did when I was little and what skills I have and lack using two inventions of the human populus ("gay powers" and gender roles being these), and just the fact that I don't think that she's ever used, or even known, the word "transgender." Although, see, she does know how to appropriately use the term "drag queen," so I'm not so sure about that last one.

But I'm getting off topic. I'd better wrap this up with a little advice:

Look at my siggggggy! It works.

/rant
 

NurseBarbra

くら くら?
322
Posts
13
Years
  • Age 29
  • Seen Feb 4, 2017
Look at my siggggggy! It works.

What If I don't like lemonade? I make life TAKE THE LEMONS BACK! I GET MAD! I DON'T WANT THE DAMN LEMONS WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THESE. I'LL DEMAND TO SEE LIFES MANAGER. LIFE WILL RUE THE DAY IT THOUGHT IT COULD GIVE NURSE BARBRA LEMONS! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM. I'M THE PERSON WHO'S GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN! WITH THE LEMONS!!
/portal2 reference....
 
85
Posts
12
Years
I would think you might take it a little more seriously, but I almost peed my pants reading that! It's just as satisfactory.

My response, myself, to my signature's statements and questions would be, in respective order:

This means that life on Earth is just a trial, and the rest of your experiences will be something more real than what is now.

If I don't enjoy the lemonade, I would pour sugar in it in strife for it to be better! I sugar-coat e'rything as it is...

Ha~

They don't. HA~

Yes...who will argue with an idiot? An idiot? ^^


EDIT: Sorry guys, got off topic. Uh...
Anyone else have "Gay Powers?"
 
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Who's Kiyo?

puking rainbows
3,229
Posts
12
Years
COLOR COATED ORGANIZED RESPONSE TIME, EVERYONE!

Shining Raichu said:
Kiyoshi, I agree with everything you say. Gay has always been a default term, a synonym, but I've never thought of it as a hindrance to someone being able to show their masculinity. One point I do have to make though, is that while homosexuality is only about who you like, not who you are, the gay label does grant us certain freedoms that homosexual may not. For instance, gay men are typically (and this is a generalization so don't shoot me for it) more able to express love for others than straight men would be.

What I'm trying to say is that it's great that you have this great self-awareness about who you are, but in some instances it's good to let a little bit of the "gay" in :). I'm also a masculine guy in real life ("straight-acting" if we're using labels), and I know that while I also prefer guys more toward the masculine end of the spectrum, I wouldn't want one so masculine that he'd feel uncomfortable saying he loved me.

That said, never has a wall of text made me feel so attracted to a person in my life.
/inappropriate

I think I'm going to regret making this post, but I don't know exactly why just yet lol

I'm not quite sure I know exactly what you mean.
Not that I didn't grasp what you said, I'm just not sure of the concept.
I don't see how being "gay," rather than homosexual or heterosexual, allows one to feel more comfortable with expressing their love for someone else in any type relationship (familial, romantic, etc.)

If you could elaborate how this works in your opinion, that would be great for me to understand just exactly your point is. :D

If someone feels uncomfortable saying they love someone, whether it's a homosexual or heterosexual relationship, I don't think that's a problem of being über masculine; that's more of a problem of being insecure or fear of commitment.

However, if it is a problem because he thinks saying "I love you" is emasculating, he's a moron who thinks every little thing threatens his masculinity and you should dump him anyway, simply put.

NurseBarbra said:
...... Marry me?

You sir, are awesome. I shall award you with cookies.

Anyone else have "Gay Powers"?

Oh yay! I do enjoy cookies.

Gay Powers?
People tell me I can pull off a lot of different clothes and look great, so if you consider that a "gay power," then yes, I guess I do.
If being a wise-cracking prick is one too, then call me supergayman.
 

FreakyLocz14

Conservative Patriot
3,498
Posts
14
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  • Seen Aug 29, 2018
I'd like to comment on the whole masculine thingy.

In Hispanic and Black homosexual male culture (especially among youth), being effeminate makes you somewhat of a pariah. Being masculine to the point where you are considered passable as heterosexual is considered golden. I think this stems from the whole DL thing where closeted men might be married to a woman and have children, but have secret relationships with other men on the "down-low". Thus, being able to pass as straight is needed so that no suspicion is drawn when the two are seen in public. Even for those who aren't hiding their sexuality, it seems like its been ingrained in their psychology due to when they might have been doing the same thing in the past.

Being of Hispanic heritage myself, I know what I'm talking about. I had a friend who discovered that her boyfriend was cheating on her. All hell broke loose when she also discovered that he was cheating on her with a guy. She's not homophobic, but slurs were used by her because she was literally in shock.
 
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Who's Kiyo?

puking rainbows
3,229
Posts
12
Years
FreakyLocz14 said:
In Hispanic and Black homosexual male culture (especially among youth), being effeminate makes you somewhat of a pariah. Being masculine to the point where you are considered passable as heterosexual is considered golden. I think this stems from the whole DL thing where closeted men might be married to a woman and have children, but have secret relationships with other men on the "down-low". Thus, being able to pass as straight is needed so that no suspicion is drawn when the two are seen in public. Even for those who aren't hiding their sexuality, it seems like its been ingrained in their psychology due to when they might have been doing the same thing in the past.

Being or Hispanic heritage myself, I know what I'm talking about. I had a friend who discovered that her boyfriend was cheating on her. All hell broke loose when she also discovered that he was cheating on her with a guy. She's not homophobic, but slurs were used by her because she was literally in shock.

I believe the concept you're talking about is Cultural Machismo.

But what I was saying was, my masculinity was being subconsciously threatened by the stereotype that was associated with the term "gay." It was "in all honesty" type of comment.
Which doesn't really relate to what you just said, but you do bring up an interesting topic of your own.

Personally, I think it's awful and selfish when somebody lives on the "down-low."
Why?
Because think about it; A guy/girl can't accept themselves to the point where they lie not only to themselves, but the other people, bringing them into the lie. They get married to a member of the opposite sex, making their life a lie, too. Then they have kids, and their existence is a lie to.
So just because you can't accept yourself, you make other peoples' lives a huge bundle of lies?

That's quite awful. And pretty unforgivable.
 

Steven

[i]h e l p[/i]
1,380
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13
Years
  • Age 30
  • Ohio
  • Seen Jan 4, 2023
I am not going to comment on the whole masculinity thing lol. However I will say, I like a mix. I don't like only manly, or only feminine. I like them to be like me, a mix of both!

I made a comic about relationships..well, mine. Again, you probably wont understand the faces if you don't read rage comics.

Warning: Contains vulgar writing.

I'll update the list and news later.
 

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.
8,959
Posts
13
Years
I'm not quite sure I know exactly what you mean.
Not that I didn't grasp what you said, I'm just not sure of the concept.
I don't see how being "gay," rather than homosexual or heterosexual, allows one to feel more comfortable with expressing their love for someone else in any type relationship (familial, romantic, etc.)

Well, I was sort of expanding on your concept that the term 'gay' is a hindrance to masculinity (therefore being stereotypically feminine), and that you don't see yourself as 'gay'. Displays of affection are typically seen as feminine (in my experience, anyway) so many men aren't comfortable partaking. That's what I mean by 'letting some of the "gay" in' :P

However, if it is a problem because he thinks saying "I love you" is emasculating, he's a moron who thinks every little thing threatens his masculinity and you should dump him anyway, simply put.

I quite agree, but still lol

Also, Nurse Barbra and I both hit on you and you don't acknowledge it? Are we not pretty enough? :P
 
85
Posts
12
Years
Oh, oh, oh, your comic was just...AWESOMELY HILARIOUS. LURVZ IT. DO MORE.

Oh, and, uh...

I came out today. To my parents. They received it very well. I wrote a note to my mom, upon my request she called my dad, and on his way there, my mom and I talked and I explained. My dad took me to Dairy Queen and got me ice cream, and we talked about it too. I was comfortable. We talked as a family (my little bro was at Camp Fitch, THANK GOD) and then my Dad went to go tell my stepmom at their house. My mom told her boyfriend over the phone, and he said that it didn't matter who I was inside. He didn't think any different of me.

I am sooooo relieved that all of the major people who need to know know now, and that they all understand. I have a meeting with the nearest professional, and we'll go from there. My parents are cutting me off whenever I say I'm sure, but we're on hypos like "if we start hormones..." and "I'll pay for this, she'll pay for that..." and all of it. I'm a lot happier NOW. I have to wait until this is all over and see how THAT feels!

/wall of text that bores you but is the best thing I've ever written

I'm happy. :3
 
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