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Ash's son

  • 150
    Posts
    16
    Years
    Ash's Son​


    By Conicteam​



    Chapter 1​


    20 years into the future, 2028, Ash Ketchum is 32, Jerry Ketchum is 60, Bill Cosby is 91, Misty is 33, May and Dawn are 31, Brock and Tracey are 43, Prof. S Oak is 80, and Prof. J. Oak is 42. Ash and Dawn are married now, but let's go 10 years back to when their son, Red Ketchum, was born. It was a painful time, but he was successfully born. Dawn hoped for a girl, but it was a boy. Now back to 2028. Their boy is now 10, and he is about to start his journey as a Pokemon Trainer.
    "I always knew you'd be a Pokemon trainer, but I never knew you'd be a musician and a singer," Ash called looking at Red's Les Paul and microphone.
    "I guess I can baffle you," Red replied. So Red went to Prof. S Oak's lab to get a starter Pokemon.
    "We only have a Pikachu left," Oak stated.
    "That's what I wanted," Red exclaimed. Red took the Pikachu.
    "My great grandson, Blue Oak, is starting his journey too," Oak stated, "so you better look out for him. He's very tough for a beginner."

    Red walked out, and he saw Blue, his new rival.
    "Hello Red," Blue sneered, "What Pokemon did you get?"
    "You can see for yourself because I'm about to battle you right now," Red exclaimed, "Go! Pikachu!"
    "Alright! Go! Squirtle," Blue exclaimed.
    "Pikachu, use thunder shock," Red commanded. It took a lot of damage on Squirtle, but he didn't faint.
    "Hang in there Squirtle! Use tackle," Blue exclaimed.
    "Dodge and use thunder shock," Red exclaimed. Squirtle fainted.
    "D'oh! I'll get you next time Red! Next time, NEXT TIME," Blue yelled as he ran off into the woods.

    Meanwhile back on Moulbious, Sonic, age 37, and Amy, 35, were sending their child, Sam the Hedgehog age 11, to school, as usual, and he waved goodbye as he got on the bus.
    "Bye mom! Bye dad," Sam yelled.
    "Bye Sam," Amy and Sonic yelled.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    How do you like it, and first one to guess where I got the "Next time, NEXT TIME!" thing gets a sprite made by me or a prototype for a game!
     
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    Sure. Now, do you know where I got the "Next time, NEXT TIME," thing. If you do, you could win a sprite made by me or a prototype of a game made by me (Hint: It's a cartoon made by DiC. Original run: 1983-1985)!
     
    Hey Ninja Murkrow, you just wasted 1 minute of your life reading it and 10 seconds of your life flaming someone.
    And isn't that against the rules?
    You know, you can always put WHY they sucked...
    Just because you're new here doesn't mean I'm gunna go easy on you...
    Now that I've finished flaming the flamer, onto the fic.

    Uhm...who's Jerry? And why isn't Delia Ketchum's age there?
    Don't need to give us a massive list of people's ages. It turns off some people. Get's you flamed by people -cough-. Not mentioning names here...

    Wait wait wait... Dawn had Red when she was 21...
    And also, what the heck do the Hedgehogs have to do with this?

    PS. So you support Pearlshipping huh? It's not bad I guess but it leaves May with...-shudders-
    Oh man... please make up some guy...
     
    Hey Ninja Murkrow, you just wasted 1 minute of your life reading it and 10 seconds of your life flaming someone.
    And isn't that against the rules?
    You know, you can always put WHY they sucked...
    Just because you're new here doesn't mean I'm gunna go easy on you...
    Now that I've finished flaming the flamer, onto the fic.

    Uhm...who's Jerry? And why isn't Delia Ketchum's age there?
    Don't need to give us a massive list of people's ages. It turns off some people. Get's you flamed by people -cough-. Not mentioning names here...

    Wait wait wait... Dawn had Red when she was 21...
    And also, what the heck do the Hedgehogs have to do with this?

    PS. So you support Pearlshipping huh? It's not bad I guess but it leaves May with...-shudders-
    Oh man... please make up some guy...

    Hun, go look up the prequel, Ash's Father. It's around here somewhere. Then you'll know about Bill Cosby, Jerry, and all that jazz.

    Don't come at someone like that, either. Flaming is against the rules.

    And also, I take it you must dislike ContestShipping. Don't flame that, either. Once again, against the rules.

    Now, to a review, I like your randomness, conicteam, but I would recommend that you lengthen this puppy. And description is key.

    "You can see for yourself because I about to battle you right,"

    I'm, not I.

    You should also use the default font. It blurs our eyes. And hit enter twice when someone new is about to speak.
     
    Chapter 2


    As soon as Red reached ViridianCity he saw a package in front of him. It read: To: Red Ketchum From: Prof.S Oak. He opened the package and saw a Poke Dex and some Pokeballs.

    "I guess he forgot to give them to me," Red thought to himself. Red looked for a gym, and saw one, but it was closed.
    "Aw man" Red sighed.

    Meanwhile on Moulbious, Delilah Ketchum, age 54, was exploring this planet. She noticed animals standing on 2 feet, and acting like humans.

    "Animals on this planet act like humans do," Delilah stated. She wrote that in her PDA.

    "Excuse me miss, but who are you," Sam asked Delilah. She turned around and saw a young blue hedgehog.
    "I'm Delilah Ketchum," Delilah replied, "and you are?"

    "I'm Sam the Hedgehog, and I'm 11 years old," Sam replied.

    "Is your daddy Sonic the Hedgehog," Delilah asked. Sam nodded.

    As soon as Delilah headed toward her ship, Sam followed her. Even when she got home, Sam still followed her.

    Red headed toward Viridian forest with Pikachu by his side. Like his father's Pikachu, It didn't like Pokeballs. While he was there, he caught a Caterpie. After that, he spotted Brock and May lying beside each over. He noticed the wedding rings on the couple's fingers. Brock and May have been married for a few years, and May is expecting a child.
    "I thought you would marry Nurse Joy," Red chuckled.

    "Well, Joy was only one of the fish in the sea, but May is way prettier than any Nurse Joy," Brock chuckled.

    Back at Delilah's house she finally noticed that Sam followed her.

    "Why did you follow me home," Delilah asked.

    "I wanted to go to Earth with you," Sam replied, "You seem like a nice lady."
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Uhm...who's Jerry? And why isn't Delia Ketchum's age there?
    Don't need to give us a massive list of people's ages. It turns off some people. Get's you flamed by people -cough-. Not mentioning names here...

    Wait wait wait... Dawn had Red when she was 21...
    And also, what the heck do the Hedgehogs have to do with this?

    PS. So you support Pearlshipping huh? It's not bad I guess but it leaves May with...-shudders-
    Oh man... please make up some guy...
    See https://www.pokecommunity.com/showthread.php?t=126289. That will explain the Jerry situation. I showed ages just to give the reader an idea of how time passed from now to 2028, but I didn't know it would turn some people off. I hope you know what Sonic's family has to do with the story now that you've read this chapter. What is Pearlshipping?
     
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    What is Pearlshipping?

    AshxDawn.

    Anyway, I still see lack of description, length, and a good number of grammar errors.

    And I must ask why this woman is on another planet. -_-;;
     
    I AM FRAKIN SHOCKED .WHO WROTE THIS.I WILL GET YOU WHEN SLEEPING AND THEN FEED YOU TO YOSHI.

    What the? That's worse flaming than me!
    And I'm sorry I didn't mean to flame :(
    Shouldn't have smashed him like that...
    I do see what the Hedgehogs have to do with this now... Delia is studying them.
    Let me clear this up for myself... Is it Delilah or Delia?
     
    What the? That's worse flaming than me!
    And I'm sorry I didn't mean to flame :(
    Shouldn't have smashed him like that...
    I do see what the Hedgehogs have to do with this now... Delia is studying them.
    Let me clear this up for myself... Is it Delilah or Delia?

    It's fine. I've probably flamed a good few fics without realizing.

    Andyway, go read the prequel. You'll know what Sonic the Hegdehog has to do with the storyline. The prequel is called Ash's Father. Just search through the pages here. But, be sure not to bump the thread.

    And it's Delia.
     
    The story needs more detail. And make sure you proof read before you post and you wouldn't have as many grammatical errors.
    You are off to a good start only being 11 and all. Just keep writing and practicing, and you will get better and better!
     
    Chapter 3
    "Why did you go to my planet anyway," Sam asked.

    "Well, I was on a mission from NASA," Delia replied

    "You mean National Association for Sloppy Astronauts (insert laugh track)," Sam replied.

    "No silly," Delia laughed, "It's National Space Association. I was sent to your planet to see if there was life, intelligent life to be exact, and I saw 7 personality categories of life."

    "You mean sophisticated, redneck, idiot, nerd, single, gay, and married," Sam asked.

    "Yes, and I saw you standing alone. I guess you're the nerd in the class," Delilah replied. Sam shook his head and said sadly, "I the rare 8th type, lonely." Sam started to cry.

    "Aw, poor thing," Delia replied in sympathy. Sam leaned on Delia, and Delia rubbed his back.


    Back in Viridian Forest, Red and Brock were talking, and decided to battle so Red can earn the badge from Brock.

    "Onix come out," Brock exclaimed.

    "I guess I'll use my new Squirtle that Ash gave me! Squirtle come out," Red exclaimed.

    "Onix use rock throw," Brock commanded Onix. The boulders tumbled onto Squirtle, but it didn't do much.

    "Squirtle use bubble beam," Red commanded Squirtle. Onix fainted, and nearly caused an earthquake.

    "Good job Red. Here's the boulder badge," Brock stated. Red happily snatched the badge and yelled, "I got the boulder badge,"

    "Just like his father," Brock sighed.

    Just then, Speed in his Mach 6 drove past them. Speed Racer Jr. is the son of the original Speed Racer and a graduate from Racer Academy. The Mach 6 is the 6th Mach model after Speed Racer Sr.'s Mach 5, though it can transform back into the Mach 5, just like the Mach 5 could transform into the Mach 4.

    "He's fast," Red stated in amazement.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    I got the Nasa joke from a comedy thing.
     
    This is kinda weird for me... my bro thinks it's weird too. I mean, Ash and Dawn get married? You do know that Ash kissed someone in a pokemon movie, right? He kissed a girl and they are an AWSOME pair. So I don't know what your smoking, no offense. and also, Ash is older than Dawn. The 1st pokemon episode started in 1995 or something, and by now, Ash is older than Dawn, way older...
     
    Not true

    The makers confirmed that Ash and May were the same age when Advance Generation started, so they're both 10!

    Ash and Dawn suck, Ash And Bianca cool!

    Ash and May also
     
    guess your right

    Not true

    The makers confirmed that Ash and May were the same age when Advance Generation started, so they're both 10!

    Ash and Dawn suck, Ash And Bianca cool!

    Ash and May also


    I guess your right, my bad...but wait, I know this is a cartoon created by japanese people, but, there was a year and a half of the first series, then another year of a diffrent series, so doesn't Ash get older???? I'm just trying to make a point, I think.........
     
    This thread is seriously getting off-topic. Off-topic posts fly, infractions fly.

    And Ash is ten, according to the Japanese information. So he's ten, no matter how much it warps your minds to think about.

    conicteam, your chapters are still short. Add more to them, or your story gets closed. I'm getting annoyed at telling you this all the time. This is your last chance.
     
    Chapter 4





    The Mach 6 stopped and the left door opened. Speed stepped out of the car with his white and blue uniform with a six in the middle. Then he took his helmet off to reveal his dirty blonde pompadour. Red was shocked when he saw it, and almost thought his red vest would fall off along with his hat, but only his hat and jeans fell off to reveal not only his silly underwear, but his brown hair and a tail.

    "Holy crap, Red has a tail?" Brock yelled, "Let's get outta here!" Brock ran away with May.Pikachu didn't really care about the tail, but he only cared about the underwear with peace signs, hearts, flowers, and Pokeballs on it that he was laughing at. Red pulled up his jeans and put his cap on. Speed was shocked to see a tail come from a human that wasn't fictional or from DBZ. He then cut a hole in Red's jeans to make room for his tail without cutting his tail. Red poked his tail through and wiggled it a little to check if there was enough wiggle room. He smiled and thanked Speed.


    Suddenly, a car that looked like it belonged to the detective Inspector Gadget drove past them. It backed up a little, and stopped. The man opened the car door and walked out of the car. The man had a gray trench coat, a pair of long gray shoes, brown eyes, black wavy hair, blue pants, a white shirt with a blue tie, and a gray hat with a light gray band. It was the description of Inspector Gadget.


    "Have you kids seen a man named," Inspector Gadget started to speak, but stopped and stared at Red's tail. "That tail," Inspector Gadget said, "is just like the one I use to have, but I cut it off 55 years ago." Inspector Gadget is actually 67 years old, but looks like a 46 year old. "You must be a sayian," Inspector Gadget said. Red looked at Gadget with a puzzled look.

    "What's a sayian?" Red asked.
    "A sayian is an alien race born to fight." Gadget replied. Red only heard him say alien and started to panic. His eyes bulged out just like in the old WB cartoons and started running in circles. Gadget stopped Red and explained the rest.


    "If you train hard enough you'll become a Super Sayian." Gadget said to Red. Red thought he meant Pokemon training and said, "You were a Pokemon trainer?" Gadget shook his head and said that he meant training in martial arts.

    Suddenly, a black car with a metal cat on it and the initials "M.A.D." on it drove past them. Gadget spotted it and yelled, "Aw man! It's the MAD mobile!" He exploded with rage and started to turn into a Super Sayian. His hair turned a sparkling gold. He buffed up, and his trench coat suit burst to reveal a more Gi like uniform.

    The car stopped, and two MAD agents stepped out of the car. One was very fat, and the other one was almost as skinny as a pole with a mustache. The MAD agents started to attack the Gadget. Gadget countered their attacks with a spin kick, and he finished them off with a very strong Kamehameha. A blast of blue energy started to build up in his hands, which were next to his right hip and in the shape of a jaw. He pushed his hands to the front of him, and the energy was released as a big blast of energy which knocked both of them out cold.

    "That's takes care of those morons." Gadget said as he clapped the dust off of his hands.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    The truth reveals itself! Red is ethier half sayian or full sayian! Which one? Find out next time on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z, I mean find out in the next chapter of Ash's Son!
     
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