I've never been spanked, I know what's wrong and what's right. I'm not disobedient.Hopefully my child takes after me!
To be fair, I think I would discuss the matter with my partner to see how we should handle decisions like this. And we would both have to agree on whether to or not.
Well maybe that could cause trouble going to the bathroom or something. Either way, there are other ways to solve the problem.
I heard that it's now illegal to spank children.
But I believe it's necessary sometimes. I mean, you don't have to beat the living Helen of Troy out of them, but you shouldn't let them overstep their bounds. Not like it concerns me because I don't plan on having kids. Ever. But it does get annoying when you go out to a public place like a store and someone's child starts crying and screaming.
No, you shouldn't be allowed to hit someone anywhere, period. I don't care how justifying you think hurting somebody is, but I don't see anything good coming from it.
I wish SOMEBODY would please explain what good comes out of hitting your child.
I agree with Hantsuki. You dont have to torture them to behave or what have you.
Also Kauai, I'm not saying you should slap them on the face or anywhere else except the butt. Slapping your kids to a point where it leaves scars is completely wrong. Its not like your spanking them hard enough to make them bleed. Just to get a point across. And I wasnt trying to make a broad generalization about every kid who was or wasnt spanked just about what I have experienced. When a child continually misbehaves and words arent working spanking is the next step.
I also agree with Yusshin when she says kids can stop misbehaving when they are told but only some kids. Not all kids can be that reasonable haha
Leaving bruises, scars are the like is definitely not ok. If you are hitting your kid that hard then you need to try something else.
Violence doesn't teach a child to behave, it simply teaches them to fear. Parents should set clear standards, explain to children why they are needed, and then set non-violent punishments on a sliding scale of severity if they misbehave. This way, they aren't doing it because they are in fear of pain, but because they understand it's the right thing to do and behave and will thus apply it to other places in their life without the need for violence.
Yeh...I've been watching too much Oprah.
I actually agree with this. Spanking a child or even hitting them is obviously the same as abuse. The child doesn't understand why you spank them and it doesn't matter if you let the child cry after explaining... let them cry. They're just children. They'll get over it after a while because they'll tire out and stop crying.
Abuse Definition said:to treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way
Actually, if you explain it to them twice on two different occasions, I don't see why a child wouldn't understand already before reaching the third strike. They'll see how serious you are about it if you spank them a bit. They won't do it again because it hurts, and they might ask why, but the parents will say "I explained it to you three times already, and you refuse to listen. Don't hit your sister" or w/e the child did. They might even reflect on what they did and think twice the next time they're going to smack their sister, or write on the walls, etc.
It's not the same as child abuse, because you only do it to cause slight pain on rare occasions in a place on the body that can't cause long-term damage. Child abuse is leaving bruising, letting a child bleed, breaking an arm. Abuse is when you go too far - that's why it's called "abuse".
Take it this way. Casual drinking. That's not abuse; it's the same as spanking. Becoming an alcoholic is abuse, or in this case, beating your child with fists.
The dictionary says:
When you spank, you don't mean to be harmful, injurious, or offensive. Your intent is not to hurt them; your intent it to show a child, specifically children who won't listen to words, that you're the parent and you know what's best, and it's best not to fight against what you say because you have reason for it. Even if the child doesn't agree with the reasoning, they'll whine and complain about everything before the age of eight. If you let them control you from a young age, or get away with things that they shouldn't get away with, they won't understand how serious certain things are.
I said to my dad as a child "**** you". He hit me. I never did that again because I realized how serious it is to insult or offend a parent / guardian at that moment in my life. "Daddy never hit me before! Why did he hit me now? It must have been really bad what I said... I didn't realize..." If my dad hadn't done that, I'm sure I would be like my sibling of whom he didn't hit: my sister, who calls him an ******* and a bastard at least twice a day.
As said, not all children can be taught with words. Most people have friends like this, too, who don't communicate with diplomacy. For a child, you spank them on the buttocks to leave red, but not a deep red. It shouldn't last more than an hour or you've hit too hard.
S'all.
You know, there's plenty of alternatives to hitting them. I would personally never lay a hand on my child unless it was to embrace them in a gentle manner, like a hug or pat on the back.so you don't end up with bratty mouthy drug addict kids that never listen to you- you have to show that you are the parent/guardian
